Clingy Like crazy!

Christine - posted on 04/08/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My daughter, Ava, is now 23 weeks. She has more recently become very clingy... She will barely even go to my husband. When I put her down she screams bloody murder. I can't find a way to be able to get anything done because she won't do anything independently at this point. It's driving me absolutely nutty! Is anyone else having this problem? Or does anyone have any suggestions for how to deal with this??? My ped. said that around this age she will start to show signs of stranger anxiety and not really go to other people, but that is only PART of the problem I'm dealing with... Please, I need advice.. I can't listen to this screaming all day long, nor can I hold her for every waking moment!

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Becky - posted on 04/08/2009

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Oh Christine, you poor thing, so she is crying all the time even when she CAN see you? I am sorry, it is so hard to be at home and get anything done, I know this is terrible but maybe you can leave her in her room with low-music on so that you can get stuff done or even get a shower without hearing her crying? Does she go down to sleep or nap well? What if you put her in the baby carrier facing you so that she can't grab anything? When I was home, I was able to cook (some stuff), do stuff on the computer (laptop) and even go to the bathroom with him strapped onto me. Of course this was not always fun, but at least he wouldn't be crying. All I can is that it will get better... This is something I've been passing onto other moms and I said it in an ad in a baby/parenting mag and it has the mom stressing out and a bubble next to the baby saying something like - "i'm sorry that i am so crabby/whiny/fussy/tired/hungry, etc. - but I will only be this age once." That helped me a lot when he was crying and I couldn't make him stop. I hope you are able to pass him on at least in the evenings or on the weekends so that you can get some mommy time.

Christine - posted on 04/08/2009

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The problem is that I'm probably like the 1 in a million mother that can't get anything accomplished with the baby in the carrier...  I don't know why, but I just can't do it...  It drives me nuts to have her in front of me, and she wants to grab everything (as most babies do).  And I guess I wasn't clear because I posted this on a couple different forums and all my responses had to do with Ava crying while I LEFT the room... however, I'm having this problem while I'm in the room- sitting on the couch, on the floor in front of her playing, if I bring her in the bathroom while I shower...  It's really ridiculous...  I try to let her cry, but she just doesn't stop unless I'm holding her.  I am an at-home mom so it's literally 12 hrs of non-stop frustration.  I'm trying to keep myself together here so I'm seeking advice... And just a mention- this started when she started teething (about 3 weeks ago). Now both teeth are in, but still...

Becky - posted on 04/08/2009

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Hi Christine - OMG, this has literally started this week (or so I've noticed) with my son, he is 24.5 weeks now and when I get home (I work FT), I put him in his little chair or standing-thingy and he is fine but when I leave the room to go change or heat up some dinner he will start crying until I come back and just stare at me and it breaks my heart. But he is OK with other people and doesn't care who holds him, so at least that is OK. But I have also heard that up to 12 months you cannot "spoil" them. But I think my son is starting to catch on because it literally happens the second I am out of his eyesight. But sometimes he is OK with me leaving, depends on how awake or tired he is I guess.



Good luck, maybe if you need to do stuff you can carry her in a bjorn or wrap?

Sue - posted on 04/08/2009

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Hi, our daughter is also very clingy, apparently it is anxiety seperation they are starting to realise that we lead "seperate lives as well" (health visitor advice), but don't yet realise that when we leave them we will always come back. Have you tried giving her a cuddly toy to suck/bite/play with & telling her that you will be back in a min or even coming back into the room & playing peep po & then going. It is just starting to work with our daughter but has taken a while and she can still be clingy but not as bad. x

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