'humping soft toys' at 18 months?

Nic - posted on 04/22/2010 ( 23 moms have responded )

48

15

3

Does anyone elses 18 month old 'hump soft toys'? Our little girl is becoming very interested in lying down on her soft toys and humping them cos it feels nice. Hmmm, how do you deal with this situation without making her feel like its 'bad' or 'ditry'?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Emma - posted on 05/05/2010

8

7

1

Hi, I got this out of the latest issue of the littles magazine in the ask the expert section there was another mother whos child was "humping" objects aswell this is what it said "masterbation is a common activity of most children, and can start as early as six months old. Children may subconsciously begin to masturbate by repeatedly rubbing there genitals or perineum against a firm surface. The rocking, rhythmical movements may be accompanied by a fluched face or vacant facial expression, sometimes misinterpreted as seizures. It may occur once weekly or several times a day and usually occurs when the child is sleepy, bored or watching tv. The best way to deal with this is to either totally ignore it (easier to do at home than in public), or to gently distract your child, without drawing attention to the fact you are doing so, by picking them up, offering him a toy, reading a story or engaging in a new activity. As your child becomes older, it may be necessary to tell them this is something you do in private and not in front of others, but make sure you do this in a way so as not to make them feel ashamed or guilty. The behaviour is likely to diminish rather then get worse with toilet training and, eventually, there sense of appropriate social behaviour will likely mean they stop the habit." hopes this helps

Shana - posted on 04/23/2010

7

7

0

Children that young do not recognize that what they are doing is sexual. They are at the age where they are exploring their environment and seeing what things are "fun" and what things cause other responses. My son is 18 months old and instead of humping persay he has been taking off his diaper and will run around naked, and occasionally will play with himself. This to him is part of exploring his body. Not something "sexual". I am studying psychology (gettin my bachelors in it as we speak) and just learned about the stages of development. This age group is all about exploring themselves and their surroundings. So I would not display any response to it. By leaving it alone, you are allowing her to explore and thus helping her develop her brain and mind.

Yvonne - posted on 05/03/2010

3

11

1

While I agree that "exploring" is a normal part of their development, I would get on some forums online and check out what other people are saying. I say this b/c I have read that children that exhibit this type of behavior and would prefer to do that rather than play may have had something going on or something that they have seen that they are mimicing. I honestly don't mean to alarm you but it is cause for concern. Start asking yourself all of the important questions, like who cares for her, what other kids are around her, do you have cause to question anyone that has access to her. In this day and age you can never be too cautious. My little girl has become very protective of her private area and hates when I try to wipe her so it has prompted me to ask all the questions and look around online for answers. Blessings and prayers.

Anna - posted on 05/02/2010

5

10

0

My 18mnths old daughter also does the same, and I thought that was strange. I just let her be, even though it's kind of embarrassing when you have people visiting your house. They give me this strange look.

Katherine - posted on 05/05/2010

24

10

0

My little boy likes to ride his bigger soft toys, and "mooches" on soft toys - buries his face and chest in them. Your girl is probably doing something between mooching and horsey-back riding. Sounds like she might enjoy a rocking horse - we have one and the 18 month old has been riding it for months. Besides that, don't worry about it. Like everything baby, it's a phase, and it'll pass. If you don't like it, pick her up every time she starts and distract her by showing her another way to love on her toys, like rubbing her cheeks on said toy. You could always make the soft toys she does it with disappear. I imagine there are plenty of other toys and she'll forget that kind of play fast if you do that. She's not at an age where she'll miss them.

This conversation has been closed to further comments

23 Comments

View replies by

Nic - posted on 02/27/2014

48

15

3

I posted this 4 years ago, my little girl is over 5 now and at Kindergarten. I just wanted to update the post to say that looking back there is no doubt that she was rubbing on her soft toys and bed at 18 months old because it felt nice. I think its normal for kids to explore their bodies and work out what feels good. I was just surprised that it started so young in her case. At five, she often still touches herself or rubs on the bed or blankets (which she sometimes purposely bunches up between her legs) in bed before she goes to sleep. At least she doesn't do it in front of us anymore as we started reminding her a few years ago that its a private thing and something to do when she is alone, in bed, or in the bath. She is a completely normal and happy little girl, just very interested in this feeling. Plus I have never told her its wrong or dirty. She of-course doesn't understand the sexual nature of it.

Thanks so much for all your posts!!

Litesha - posted on 01/03/2014

2

0

0

I have two twins a boy and a girl they are nearly 2. I sometimes let them both walk around in there diaper and sock i walked in to them the 1 day both sitting down, my daughters nappy off and they are both messing with her bits and she was giggling (like she was enjoying it) i didnt say anything i just got her a new diaper and put it on and tried playing with them, but i found that whenever i leave the room, they keep doing it. What should i do?

Jeri - posted on 12/17/2013

59

54

5

Don't make a big deal out of it, try ignoring the behavior. Or talk to her doctor.

Nic - posted on 12/11/2013

48

15

3

I posted this 4 years ago, my little girl is over 5 now and at Kindergarten. I just wanted to update the post to say that looking back there is no doubt that she was rubbing on her soft toys and bed at 18 months old because it felt nice. I think its normal for kids to explore their bodies and work out what feels good. And some kids do this at an earlier age than others. At five, she often still touches herself or rubs on the bed or blankets (which she sometimes purposely bunches up between her legs) in bed before she goes to sleep. At least she doesn't do it in front of us anymore as we started reminding her a few years ago that its a private thing and something to do when she is alone, in bed, or in the bath. She is a completely normal and happy little girl, just very interested in this feeling. Plus I have never told her its wrong or dirty. She of-course doesn't understand the sexual nature of it.

Thanks so much for all your posts!!

Penny - posted on 05/05/2010

192

7

40

i dont think its possible for her to feel anything sexually nice when doing this. i dont think the right hormones are there to make this possible until puberty begins around 11yrs old. im not concerned when my son plays with himself i think its normal for them to do this.

Tiffany - posted on 05/04/2010

279

28

4

I dont think she's "humping" the way we look at it (sexually)
She's more than likly "bouncing" and hugging.
To be crude, it isnt as if she's rubbing her yoo-hoo on it to get off..you know?

My daughter, same age, also jumps on her big teddies and lies on them... and sort of bounces around on them... but I think its pretty norm.
It's them showing affection Id say.

Nic - posted on 05/03/2010

48

15

3

Thanks again for your comments ladies. My daughter doesn't attend any type of day care, I am a stay at home Mum and I am with her 100% of the time. We don't have any family here, or any babysitters or other children. During her playdates with babys her age, I am with her. I definitely don't think there is anything 'concerning' about her actions. She hasn't tried to hump soft toys since that first time I saw her so I guess she was just exploring herself. She often touches her clitorus in the bath, but I don't think that is out of the ordinary for her age group. Like I said in a earlier post, I think she realized humping a soft toy felt nice by accident - she used to rub her hips (hump) on the bed while she was on her tummy because it used to relieve the tummy discomfort she had as a baby - she realized this also felt nice and still does this sometimes while in bed. Its nice to know that she's not the only one 'exploring her body' - thanks for your posts ladies!!

Jenny - posted on 04/30/2010

1

10

0

My 18 month old son does the same thing to Noddy! I don't think there is anything sinister to it, and I just let him carry on. I think they are only exploring their own body. At least I know he's not the only one who is doing it!

Nettie - posted on 04/29/2010

11

0

0

My 18 month old daughter just discovered her vagina whicle I was changing her diaper, now everytime she is without her diaper she touches it and giggles... my sons did the humping thing when they were small, I just ignored it and they eventually stopped doing it.

Kelly - posted on 04/29/2010

17

20

0

is your daughter attending childcare? maybe at some stage she has picked up the habit from there, however my 18month old son does play with himself as weird as i felt at the start i just came to grips that boys will be boys and its probably just a natural thing =)

Stacia - posted on 04/28/2010

5

11

0

The doctor told me that as most moms have posted its normal for them to be curious about their bodies and all of its parts. If she's rubbing against her stuffed animals or even trying to touch herself while you change her diaper let it go and just try to move her attention to something else. It's a faze and it will pass.

Cory - posted on 04/27/2010

1

25

0

My son started the same thing at about the same age. We just ignore it. He usually does it right before bed so we just say good night and leave. I guess I would just tell her to wait until nap/bed time for this activity. If she is doing it at random during the day, redirect her attention to something else. Hope this helps :-)

Nic - posted on 04/26/2010

48

15

3

Thanks for your replies ladies. I agree that its not sexual and its important to let your children explore their bodies and surroundings. She has often moved her hips to rub on her bed while on her tummy - something that I think started when she was very young and had tummy discomfort - the motion would relieve the tummy discomfort and she realized rubbing on the bed felt nice too. The other day was the first time I saw her 'humping' soft toys though and I left her for 25 mins, then I felt it was about time she did something else and I tried distracted her (by making the toy dance). She took the toy off me and placed it back under her crouch and carried on 'humping' on it. She got upset when I tried distracting her again because she wanted to continue so I just wondering what other Mums thought. Thanks so much for your comments!

Andrea - posted on 04/25/2010

23

30

3

I would just let her do what she is doing but don't encourage her. My son is 18 months and will touch himself and laugh and be a little silly but it only lasts a few mins then he is onto something else.
I would say that they are just exploring what body parts are and when they are old enough we have to start telling them what they are and do

Alison - posted on 04/24/2010

24

6

4

My daughter has found her vagina while in the tub, and says "boboo" when she touches it. Originally, when she found it, she would just touch it and then giggle over and over. I tried not to make a big deal out of it, either, or make her feel bad. I would just try to distract her with something else. Maybe you should try that.

Larissa - posted on 04/23/2010

20

4

3

hmm does she say it feels good? Or are you just assuming that because many children rock or bounce or "hump" i guess you could say, for comfort I don't know the psychology behind it but the movement somehow comforts them. I would say in combination with her soft toy it's probably more of a soothing thing than sexual.

Nic - posted on 04/22/2010

48

15

3

She doesn't know its sexual, to her it just feels nice because humping her crouch up and down on her soft toys put pressure on her clitorus and it feels nice.

Verniece - posted on 04/22/2010

16

9

2

Wow, I have no idea what to tell you. Are you sure she's actually "humping" them? I don't think their brains are advanced enough to even realize what they are doing at that age.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms