How do you deal with christian disaproval?

Lisa - posted on 08/07/2010

Read up! If they actually knew their Bible they would realize most stories and practices can from pagan celts!! A good example is the story of King Authur, it is an old celtic story dated before Christ and the Roman Catholics twisted the celt names and made the story their own, just as they have done with many others. We existed before they did and are still around today, their ancestors were at one time pagans, so shove that up their throats!!!

Soleil - posted on 06/25/2010

My husband and I are raising our children as Odenists, which is based on the ancient religion of the Vikings, and his family is very Christian, and southern! His mom was convinced I was the devil, and going to hell and yada yada yada. I think the best thing you can do, is remind them you believe in good, and that their own beliefs state that it is not their job to judge. Really, you just have to hold your head high, and as long as you're secure in your beliefs, that is all that matters.

Kimberly - posted on 06/14/2010

Honestly, I'm very open about it. The only person I keep it from really is my 92 year old grandmother who would never really get it in the first place. I see no reason to upset her with anything at her age. I do tell people that I'll answer any questions they have so long as they are asked in earnest and that I ask for them to respect my beliefs as they want theirs to be, doesn't always work.

I always explain that I do believe in god and that I see it as being a different side of the same thing when it comes to religious differences. If you look at a tree from one side you see something different when you walk to the other, even though it's the same tree.

Telling them that you appreciate their concern and welcome all prayers is always good too. And if everything else fails, you can always do the break down method, and talk about their faith from and outside perspective and show them that things always look different when you don't understand them.

Lucy - posted on 03/03/2010

I dont know what your views are in regards to your branch of Paganism. I have 2 very good answers that shutup all except the move feverish and frothing christians.

I do believe in God I just beilive in the Goddess too.

Pagnism is the europeon Equiliant to first nations spirituality.

You will always get the ones who beilieve you are going to hell if you are not christian I simply don't talk to them about it and tell them they are offending me if they become pushy. It takes a bigger person to walk away than to fight. The energy for fighting is already there with people like that and to not particapate and smile and understand thier limatations takes your own power back from them. It leaves them speechless. It is not up to us to educate them they may simply not be able to see it from our viewpoint. At that point you are creating a diffrent kind of Karmic energy and true tolerance can begin because you ar understanding and accepting them for who they are not who you want them to be. If they can not accpet you just walk away.

I know that is hard with in laws. Your stoery sounds so much like my own with my in laws. And in the end I had to be the one who stopped the fight. It took me 3 years to even tell them that they were offending me and tell them my beiliefs. then it took 4 more years for them to realise that I did not just pick a religion to spite them ! they honestly thought I was just saying it to be perverse!

You never can know whereyour path will lead you ...What you can do though is know how you walk your own path. The example you set will echo through out your life and other people's lives.

Blessed Be.

Dina Cepeda - posted on 10/24/2009

Oh, I can so relate. I am so tired of the christians shoving their faith down our throat.

Myra - posted on 10/16/2009

When I have someone like that, I simply tell them, "I am a good person, that should prove my faith is not promoting the things you think it does. I am done having this same argument...it does neither of us any good. I accept our differences, and hope you can, as well. I refuse to have to repeat myself, so, to keep peace and balance - which BOTH our faiths teach - I will say nothing more on the subject."

If they continue to argue or start again at a later time, just don't say anything. If you get to the point where you *might* in their mind prove them right, simply and politely excuse yourself. Christians seem to want to prove we are bad people, so try to always keep your cool - even if you have to remove yourself from the situation.

Rebekah - posted on 09/19/2009

I too, have been put in similar situations while my family is very open and don't really care as my Dad is a very open Atheist and my Mom and her side are very Catholic, They have never really cared about what I believe as long as I'm happy. On the other hand my DH family the first thing I was asked was when the Baptism was (they are also Catholic.) So I think they have always just figured I followed my Mothers religion as they all belong to the same Parish. I don't know? Anyway I told them that it was my child's choice to be Baptized and if when she is older she decides to follow a Christian path then that is fine with me and I will support her in it the same as if she decides to become an Atheist like her Grandfather or follow the Pagan Path that I and her Dad lead. I told them all that at her first birthday there would be a blessing and I would allow anyone to bless her under whatever God or Goddess they see fit. (Oddly enough the one person in his family who stuck up for me is a cousin who is attending the Seminary to become a Catholic Priest) I will teach her what I believe but also have no problem with her going to Mass with them if they want to take her and she wants to go. I truly believe everyone has a path and each Path is as individual as the person themselves. When she enters an age of Reason I have no doubt that she will choose what is right for her.

on a side note: By the way the way My brother believes similarly to me and has done religion much the same way and his kids are now in there teens and love celebrating all the holidays. His son seems to lean more towards Christianity while my niece is such a little witch and I love her visits where we talk and do rit's together.
At 12 she said something to me this summer that made complete sense and is the reason I bring it up she said, and I quote; I will always celebrate the Holidays that Grandma and her Nana's family celebrate because it brings together all the energies of family and family love and that is one of the best kinds of energy ever.

Vignette-Noelle - posted on 08/30/2009

I have a similar situation. My in-laws are also Christian though my husband and I are not. So far, it hasn't really come up though I anticipate it will once our daughter is born and things like holidays and such become more important. My best advice to you is not to argue about it. Just listen to their side and if they ask you, tell them your side. It never does anybody any good to be pushy with their beliefs. When I have had discussions with Christians about my beliefs I usually point out the similarities rather than the differences. (For example, Easter can be traced back to Ostara or the that love is a big part of the philosophy behind my religion) I think it's all about finding common ground. Best of luck to you! Hope you can find some common ground with your in-laws! ;)

Firebird - posted on 08/18/2009

My ex's family hassled me for a few years to baptize my daughter (they're all Catholic) but I never felt it was necessary. One day my ex's brother said "it doesn't even matter just do it. It'll make Granny feel better." I simply replied "you're right, it doesn't matter, which is why I won't bother with it. I'm a Pagan, a Witch, why would I baptize my daughter Catholic?" and that was the last I heard of it from anyone. I did not get pregnant and have my daughter to "make Granny feel better" so there is no reason to raise my daughter as such. As for dealing with other Christians, I usually just laugh. My family is largely Catholic too but the ones who know my faith, never look down on me for it, even if they did, I would still laugh at them. Maybe because I was picked on my whole life I developed this "I don't care who you are or what you say, you can't hurt me anymore" attitude. For all who do have problems with friends and family not accepting your faith, good luck! Love and light. )O(

Cori - posted on 07/23/2009

It's difficult, but I manage. I can argue with them like nobody's business, but in the end, it's like trying to mentally move a brick wall. Not happening.

My father still talks down about my choice of religion. My son was born on june 20th last year (yep, either day or day before Litha, depending on where ya are) and was baptised that night by me during a thunderstorm in our hospital room. My father asked me if I was going to get my son baptised Christian and I told him he was baptised in my religion and that was that. He continued to annoy me about it and I asked him what the h-e-double hockey sticks was his issue; that my religion was recognized since 1975 and that I don't believe in Christian Hell or Heaven, and that I wasn't going to impose such a horrible view of the world and afterlife on my son (and some other things that I won't repeat here because I really got nasty about organized religion and its evils). He eventually gave up.

I usually tell people I don't know who get in my face about religion that I follow a different path and to respect it. They get nasty with me, I return the favor, and they see the door in their faces.

Family? They leave me alone. They know better. ROFL.

Laura - posted on 07/09/2009

I have the same issue with my in-laws. My husband used to be a practicing Christian but since joining the military he no longer practices and questions some of the beliefs. My family is fine with my practicing Wicca, but my in-laws, who talk every Sunday of going to worship look down on me. My MIL told me once that she was sad that when I died she wouldn't see me in heaven and she was angry when I talked about raising this baby Wiccan. In fact she called my husband and yelled at him about it.



I try not to get involved in conversations about religion with the in-laws. They don't agree with my beliefs and I don't see any point in fighting with them over it. How this baby is raised is between my husband and I and they have no right to put in their two cents, so I just keep my mouth shut and just let whatever negative things they say roll off me.



As for getting into aurguments about it, I don't. I well state my opinion, but if things get heated I will walk away. I do not let people call me a devil worshipper, those people I will set straight, like the in-laws, who called me that in the beginning. I told them I don't even believe in the devil, heaven or hell, but as for fighting about it... I see no point.

Jae - posted on 07/07/2009

I have had many debates with christians over this. My family is devout christians (mostly) and they are very supportive. My dad and I actually have friendly religious debates. The other christians in society tho....I wish I could say that I can argue peacefully with them but I have to admit, when they start yelling and calling me names I get defensive and tend to fight even more. I guess I really don't know how to be polite about it other than just let them think what they want. Everyone is entitled to their beliefs and that includes their prejudices. If they want to believe you are a devil worshiper let them but you can also try to calmly let them know if they ever want to know more you are only to happy to instruct them on what it is exactly you believe.

Amber - posted on 04/07/2009

My family is very aware of my beliefs. And it is very difficult at times. My response when someone is trying to "argue" is, "You have every right to believe what you will, as do I. If you don't want to hear what I believe, then I do not want to hear what you believe." I also bring up the "historical" facts or lack there of about the bible, 9 times out of 10 that is enough to get anyone to listen to me. Even my Aunt who is about as Christian as you can get.
As for being called a devil worshiper. I have no problem being disrespectful when it comes to that. If someone can't respect you by getting the facts first. Then, in my opinion, they deserve no respect. They don't need to agree, they just need to understand. I guess I have been pretty lucky, and most of the people I have dealt with have listened and spoken to me and I've been lucky to have many wonderful conversations on the topic of religion. There have been a few times that people have gotten hateful or rude, and I have just removed myself from the conversation with this, "I can see that you have no tolerance or understanding to listen to what I am saying, therefore, I no longer have the tolerance, want, or need to listen to what you are saying."
I hope you can find a way that works for you!

Lin - posted on 03/24/2009

In regards to your in-laws -There's nothing wrong about expressing who you are; in fact it would be better for them to hear it from you than from someone else, or discovering it on their own; if they are uncomfortable, there's a personal issue that they need to work out.  And hey, you might be doing them a favor, by challenging themselves to love someone that is different, to give them the opportunity to grow as a person.

In regards to Christian vs. Pagan arguments - Who says you have to argue?  If someone is attacking you for your beliefs, you don't have to put up with it - remove yourself from the conversation.  Maybe give them a couple of good resources that they can use to educate themselves about Paganism before they start talking about something they do not know about.....I'd recommend Christians and Pagans and www.religioustolerance.org.

In regards to your grandparents - I personally come from a background that just because you're family or old doesn't mean you can still be disrespectful to others and still expect respect back.  If they are not listening to what you are saying (it sounds like it to me), how much respect should you really give them?  Ask them what part of "I don't even believe in the devil don't you understand?"  When they can't answer that, ask them to please listen to what you're saying.  Maybe you'll get the point across.

With coming out to everyone, realize not everyone is going to jump up in rejoicing and say, "Let's have a coming out of the broom closet party!"  Be who you are and let them decide how they want to act - and if they want to act like buttheads know that they are missing out on a wonderful woman.  Really, in the end, appeasing other people is not what is going to make you happy - embracing and celebrating yourself is.