At what age are men too old to have kids?

Beck - posted on 10/04/2010 ( 16 moms have responded )

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I'm just curious as to what people think as we as women have a bit of a time limit and things start getting difficult over 40 tho many mums still have babies then. But what age does it start getting weird for a man to father kids? You have to take into consideration whether he will be able to play with them,or how old the child will be when the father passes away which these days the male life span is around 70-80 or so isn't it?

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Jodi - posted on 10/04/2010

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Studies have shown that men begin to have an abnormal DNA fragmentation index at the age about the age of 56. This leads to an increase in likelihodd of birth defects or miscarriage.

So yes, I do believe there comes a point at which men are too old to have children.

In addition to the biological factors, there is the role of the father in the child's life, and obviously as a man get older, there is increased likelihood that he won't be around until his child has finished growing, or that he will be retiring before his children are grown and self-supporting. I do think there comes a point at which choosing to have a child becomes a purely selfish decision.

Alison - posted on 10/05/2010

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I think that if a man is with a younger woman, there is nothing wrong with having a baby at 50.

Jayde - posted on 10/05/2010

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I agree with Jodi -Simply think about the child & how unfair it would be to them. Definitely think its selfish.

Krista - posted on 10/04/2010

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I think with both men AND women, anything over 45 is starting to push it for having biological kids. Not only are the woman's eggs getting older and less numerous, but from what I've read, the man's sperm quality is starting to suffer as well.

As far as adoption goes, it really depends on the health of the adoptive parents, I guess. If two 50 year olds are still very fit and energetic, and want to adopt a 6-year old or something, then I don't see that as being an issue.

But yeah, you do read about some men who are fathering kids at age 70, and I really just don't think that's a good idea. Sure, any of us could die at any time, but when you're fathering a child at age 70, the odds of you seeing your kid graduate from high school are REALLY pretty slim. And there's no way in hell too many 73-year olds would have the energy to keep up with a busy toddler all day, every day.

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Sherri - posted on 10/05/2010

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I don't think it will happen my husband gets mistaken all the time for a far younger man no one on his softball team even relatively realizes his age. He plays with 20 something yr olds and then he tells them he is 41 and they almost fall over dead as he is quicker and faster then most on the team.
My son has a friends parents that are quite a bit older. No one even cares a hoot. They are the neighborhood place to be. Actually the mom just went and got her black belt in karate and is in her 50's not actually sure the exact age but I know both parents are well into there 50's with an 8 yr old.

Beck - posted on 10/05/2010

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How would having an older dad affect the child, as I pointed out earlier what about the childs friends with younger dads being able to do lots of stuff but if a child has a father in his 50's then situation differs dramatically. How would a child cope with that if it became an issue for them being teased that their dad is old etc

Sherri - posted on 10/05/2010

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I don't know why I feel the way I do but probably because there are way more men in the public eye and even that I know personally that are older dads and they are amazing. They keep up with them and are still amazing dads. Look at David Letterman he was 56 when his son was born!!

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My husband is 12 yrs older than me. He is 45 yrs old. We have a 5 yr old, 16 month old & I'm due to have another in 2 months... He's not too old. He is in good shape & can still play with them. Granted, he can't/won't play with them like if he was in his 20's, but he tries. Once our kids are a little older we plan to do foster care, because I want more children, but don't want to put them at risk with us being "old"...

Dawn - posted on 10/05/2010

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I don't see a problem with a man or woman being in their 40's......my husband is 43 and our child is only 19 months. On the other side, my uncle is in his late 60's and has 2 children in early childhood....I feel sorry for them as they get older, as my uncles health is already compromised. I actually think I have a bigger problem with people having children too young if they aren't ready to take care of them.

Beck - posted on 10/05/2010

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I'm curious about the emotional sides of things of how a child would deal with an older father, what would it be like for them for when they are at school and their friends dads are young and running around and coaching the soccor team but their dad is 50 and starting to have heart problems...

Charlie - posted on 10/05/2010

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I think of it in terms of " how many quality years do i have to offer a child " .

Yeah i would go with in their 40;s man or woman !

Erin - posted on 10/05/2010

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I agree with Krista... anything beyond early 40s is dicey for me (man or woman). I believe parents never stop parenting their children. A man fathering a child in his 50s or 60s is doing that child a huge disservice. He could conceivably be old and frail before the kid is out of high school. Who wants to move their father to a nursing home at the same time as they go off to university? Not me.

Jodi - posted on 10/04/2010

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Really Sherri? You don't think it would be irresponsible for a 70 or 75 year old man to be fathering a child?

Candi - posted on 10/04/2010

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My uncle was 47 when his daughter was born. He and his wife tried for years then when they stopped trying b/c they felt they were old and it would never happen, guess what? A baby was on the way!! My brother-in-law is also in his late 40s and his oldest kid is only 8! It all depends on the person I guess

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