Baby Shower....

[deleted account] ( 25 moms have responded )

Is it appropriate to have a baby shower for your 3rd baby??

We are having a boy this time around & actually have everything we could possibly need. Clothes, blanket, toys..whatever. But I thought maybe it would be ok to have a "Diaper Shower"... I would have it after he was born so everyone could hold him. But is it rude to have a shower & tell people to just buy diapers & wipes???

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Stephany - posted on 09/25/2010

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My best friend is in the military and lives far from home. I wasn't able to make it out for her first pregnancy, so I threw a babyshower for her second baby. Since she still had all the general "baby stuff" from baby #1 (only 16 months apart, mind you), I threw a baby book shower. I made the invitations to look like little fairy tale books ('One day the King and Queen decided it would be nice to bestow their kingdom with a prince...etc.). Included in the invitation was a request that each guest gift the expectant "queen" with a copy of their favorite childhood story book. Everybody thought it was really creative and had a fun time finding some great, classic children's books.
We had a friend decorate a sheetcake to look like the cover of my best friend's favorite childhood book. It was really cute.
I also had a raffle. Anybody who brought an outfit or pack of diapers or wipes was entered into a raffle. The winner received a $25 gift card to Target.
I like hte idea of a 'welcome baby' party, though. That way you could host it yourself and still have the get-together to celebrate the baby (which, in my opinion, is far more important than gifts anyday).
Have fun, and congratulations!

Alison - posted on 09/24/2010

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Whether or not a shower is appropriate depends entirely on your social circle (it's not about right/wrong, but socially acceptable). I have heard of Diapers and Dinners showers for subsequent children, but I do not think you should host a shower yourself.



Make it a "meet the baby" party and don't ask for gifts at all. Some people will ask if you need anything, to which you can reply with a diapers request. And some will bring teddy bears and sleepers no matter what you tell them.

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[deleted account]

I don't think it's innappropriate to have a 'Welcome Baby' party but I wouldn't expect gifts. Come to think of it, I wouldn't EXPECT gifts at any party.

Charlie - posted on 09/24/2010

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Teresa said - Every baby deserves to be celebrated, so I don't feel it is rude at all.

You aren't having a baby shower though. You're having a 'welcome to the world' party. Which IS totally appropriate for you to throw yourself. :)


I agree with Teresa !

Nikki - posted on 09/24/2010

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Here we only throw showers for the first, I could maybe understand for the second if it was a girl and you had a boy prior and vice versa, but If I were to have another boy, I have everything we need so I couldnt really ask for anything else, hell for his birthday i wanted winter clohtes and diapers and even then I didnt ask for that kind of stuff, I let people make their own decisions. I think if someone was throwing a 2nd or 3rd shower for diapers and wipes, i probably wouldnt attend but thats just me

Candi - posted on 09/24/2010

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yes, no matter wht you request, you will get the norm, blankets and bears! Since my son was born in January, people thought we'd be living outside I guess, b/c they gave us so many blankets we couldn't use them all. When my daughter was born 16 months later, (she was born in May) we didn't get a single blanket for her. Good thing we still had plenty from my son!!

Charlene - posted on 09/24/2010

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@Candi. There was two showers for my daughter because my boyfriend's aunt held one for his family and my aunt held one for my family. Also, my BIL's girlfriend just had twins and she had four before they were born. One hosted by her mom, one by her friend, one by my boyfriend's cousin and another by her step-mom.

Candi - posted on 09/24/2010

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My sister had shower for all 3 of hers. of course between baby 2 and baby 3, there was a 20 year gap! I had showers for my first 2 b/c first was a boy and second was a girl! My showers were thrown by my MIL. Heck a friend of mine hd 2 showers for her first. One before the baby was born in the state she lived in, then one at her moms house(in another state) after the baby was born

Sherri - posted on 09/24/2010

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In the US typically you only have 1 baby shower and that is for your first born only. It is held before the baby is born to help the mom with items she may need to become a new mother. Baby showers for other children comes across as greedy and not acceptable.

Starr - posted on 09/23/2010

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I think Diaper parties are always acceptable. It doesn't matter how many kids you have. NO, it is not rude. Just have a friend get together an invitation or do it through email and have fun. We even go to the point of listing what brand of diapers and wipes we like best. I had a baby shower and a diaper party for my oldest. With the diaper party we included at the bottom of the invite that we would like to start a library for our lo and would love it if everyone brought their favorite children's book and sign it for the babe. It ended up being really nice. Have fun.

[deleted account]

I think it is just fine to have a diaper & wipe party. I would have no problem going to one if any one I knew someone was having a third child. Diapers & wipes are not that expensive (you can always find coupons) and it takes the pressure off of having to go to a store & look through a ten page registry. In fact whenever anyone I know has a baby I give them diapers & wipes. I don't think it's wrong for you to throw it for yourself either. It's for the baby, it's like a birthday party for one of your kids. I think it's a fun idea & there will always be some one bent out of shape about what you do. Plus if people want they will buy you other gifts by choice. I think you should call it a "Celebration of Life Party"
Diapers & Wipes would be much appreciated!!!
Sounds good to me, Congrats on the baby :)

Rosie - posted on 09/23/2010

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i wish we would've!! i don't think theres anything wrong with it at all!!

April - posted on 09/23/2010

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Teresa...I love the way you think!! you always have a good outlook on things!! i love the idea of a welcome party. it wouldn't be rude because you'd be feeding these people. it's not cheap to throw a party. some kind of small gift would be very appropriate here.

[deleted account]

I agree with Teresa. And maybe it depends on your family. I don't live near mine, but if I did they would love a "welcome" party and wouldn't care if I requested diapers if they wanted to bring a gift.

[deleted account]

Every baby deserves to be celebrated, so I don't feel it is rude at all.



You aren't having a baby shower though. You're having a 'welcome to the world' party. Which IS totally appropriate for you to throw yourself. :)

Charlene - posted on 09/23/2010

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Where I am from, there is a shower for each one.. I have never heard of not having a shower for a 2nd or 3rd child.

But yeah, I think it would be better to get someone else to host it. Or, I like the idea of a 'Welcome Baby' get together as well.

[deleted account]

I feel it's appropriate if there is a large age gap between babies. If not, then the suggestions of "Welcome Home Baby" is more suitable. By hosting your own shower, it might send a message that your seeking gifts, and I know you're not. But others may misinterpret that. Sending a word of mouth "We need diapers & wipes" is the best case scenario. Best of luck to you!

Krista - posted on 09/23/2010

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Traditionally, showers are just for the first baby, but it's now considered appropriate to celebrate the birth of any baby with a get-together of family and friends. Like Candi said, some people host a "Welcome Baby" party after the baby is born (and that's one that you CAN host yourself), and you can ask a loose-lipped friend to spread the word that you're desperate for diapers.

Krista - posted on 09/23/2010

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Yeah, sorry. It's rude to throw your own shower, and it's rude to tell people to just buy diapers and wipes.

If someone offers to host a shower for you, they could host a "It's a Boy" party, which at least differentiates it somewhat from your first shower and takes a bit of the focus off of gifts, gifts, gifts. Then, on the invites, you can discreetly include registry information. And register mostly for diapers, but include a few other items, just so that it's not so blatant.

Candi - posted on 09/23/2010

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When my 3rd child was born, people refused to throw me a shower b/c it was my 3rd! They said showers were only appropriate for the first. Although we had nothing for a baby. We thought we were finished with our second, so we got rid of everything. She was a surprise after a 15 month deployment. There's a 5 yr gap between our 2nd and 3rd! few people gave us outfits, but nothing else. It was sad. We were military, far from family, and no one acknowledged a baby had been born. I don't really care though. If you live near family ask to have a shower thrown. Absolutely ask for a diaper/wipe shower! My sister got married after living with her bf for 10 yrs, so they asked for a Wishing Well reception, where people just give them money instead of gifts. Everyone respected her wishes and thats what they got. Go for it. Good Luck

[deleted account]

Could you ask a close friend or relative to throw the shower for you? I wouldn't do one for myself. But I think it would be okay for someone else to do it. From what I've experienced with second and third children (not my own, friends and family) people tend to give a small gift anyway. If someone asks what you need, tell them diapers.

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