Children and smoking

Nikki - posted on 02/24/2010

I am a smoker and so is my husband and both of our families..... but NEVER will I smoke near my son... we go outside... we do not smoke in the car ever even if he is not in it... when we take him for a walk in the stroller we don't smoke until after we get home and he is inside.... we do not go to anyone's house where they smoke inside...we wash our hands and brush our teeth before we pick him up.... We know we have a horrible habit and hope to one day quit but in the meantime there is no way our son will ever suffer b/c of it... and so many of our family members are like bring him over we'll smoke in the other room... or if we are outside with him they will light up... we will walk away with him.. they get mad... I DONT CARE , we will not expose him to smoke and if they want to see him they will just have to live with our rules no ands ifs or buts

Meghan - posted on 02/24/2010

My husband smokes but never directly in front of or around Carleigh. He doesn't even want to smoke but he still continues...he can quit for 6 weeks at a time and then for whatever reason he just starts right back up...who knows...I don't think its ever okay to smoke around your kids. Everyone says their minds are like little sponges anyway do they think that smoking is magically something they will not pick up? I would like to know what percentage of kids who's parents smoke will grow up to smoke themselves...I bet its a pretty high margin...idk...they want to be just like you so if you don't want your kids to smoke...don't smoke around your kids to begin with! I really hope Cyle will someday...

Melissa - posted on 02/24/2010

I think it should be completely avoided! My husband and I do not smoke, neither does his family. My mom only smokes in the garage, so I have no problem with my son being there. But my dad smokes in his house, I will not bring my son over there and put him in the position to breath that in. I know what it can do to a person and I will not tolerate it around my son.

Brandi - posted on 02/24/2010

It is never okay to smoke around anyone, much less a child.

Keisha - posted on 02/24/2010

Yes actually! He quit smoking when we found out I was expecting and hasnt gone back since but his 3 brothers still do.

Teresa - posted on 02/24/2010

Keisha, I would not bring my kids to that house. If they want to see your daughter they can come to you (preferably in a public place so they don't reek up your house). I wouldn't bring it up to them though. That would be your fiance's responsibility. I don't think you're being anal about it at all. If my parents smoked, my kids wouldn't be in their house either. Even if they didn't smoke while we were there. All their stuff would still reek and have all the toxins in it.....

Alison - posted on 02/24/2010

Invite them to your place instead. If they are not willing to make the necessary efforts you shouldn't feel bad about turning down the invitation. Tell them, I would love to, but I really don't feel comfortable unless you can promise to smoke outside.

I have strong opinions about children and smoking, but if they agree to do all of their smoking outside, I would suck it up and bring my kids over for a few hours. And please don't make any negative comments when you are there. It is just poor form.

Dana - posted on 02/24/2010

Keisha, you should never have to bring it up to them, it's your husbands parents, it's his job to take care of it. Out of curiosity, did your husband used to smoke or any of his siblings who grew up around it? I always love when people say "Oh, I smoked around my kids and they were fine" I always think, well how many of your kids grew up to be smokers because they thought it was fine. *eye roll*

Dana - posted on 02/24/2010

Never is a good age for me. I used to smoke so it's not like I'm so anti smoking that I'm unreasonable but I couldn't ever imagine there being a good age for my son to be around cigarette smoke.

On a side note, I was leaving the doctor's office at a hospital and saw a lady sitting in the front passenger seat with a baby/toddler on her lap. I was still far off and I thought to myself I hope that baby has a car seat in the back and he just happens to be sitting in the front for a second (it was in a drop off/ pick up lane of the hospital). So I was already working up to getting mad. I get closer and it's a little boy of about 11-12 months old sitting on her lap and in her hand maybe 4 inches from his face is a cigarette. She had ALL the windows rolled up. I looked around for a cop to tell him, yeah....I was going to rat that b*tch out. No cop was around and I wasn't about to get into it in the middle of the city with some chick and her husband/boyfriend who was also in the car. Days like those make me wish a was a big ole bruiser of a man.

Keisha - posted on 02/24/2010

You guys have some very good points! I can talk to my parents and they pretty much get the point now and smoke outside whenever we are there and also for a few hours before we even get there (yes Im that anal about it) but my fiances parents just dont understand ,they have 4 sons including my fiance, and smoked in the house with them all since they were born! they are always inviting us over but never with enough time for them to clear out the house (think "supper is in a half hour yous should join us" kinda thing) and they are chain-smokers who never open a window. I just dont know how to bring it up...AGAIN without sounding overly bitchy

Alison - posted on 02/24/2010

I don't think it's ever ok to smoke in the family home no matter how old the kids are. It's not so bad to go to public places where people smoke every now and then. I live in Tennessee where it's only legal to smoke outdoors most places. I don't think it's as bad for people to smoke round their kids when they're outside. I would rather see parents smoking at the park than imagine them sitting next to their kids on the couch having a smoke.

Teresa - posted on 02/24/2010

I don't smoke and would love to allow absolutely no smoking around my children ever (especially since I'm allergic... not life and death allergic, but still quite annoying). Unfortunately my ex started smoking after bailing on us (he quit before we started dating and was smoke free for 9ish years), so I don't have a say in the matter anymore.

Chatty - posted on 02/24/2010

Kinda off topic! Charlene: I took my 17 month old daughter to Vegas recently to visit my sister-in-law and I was disgusted by the fact that you could still smoke pretty much EVERYWHERE! Walkin around in the casino's they all stink of old stale smoke and in the restaurants people were lighting up around us.......it was sooo strange because like you I've gotten so used to people not being able to smoke anywhere......I used to smoke so I'm not comdemning it but I have to say we take it for granted here!



I wouldn't allow anyone around my daughter with a lit cigarette or any other lit substance! That being said I won't shelter her from it; like some of the other moms said it's a good opportunity to explain that it's a bad, YUCKY ( as my daughter calls it ) habit! Good luck!

Charlene - posted on 02/24/2010

Where I am originally from(PEI), it's illegal to smoke in public places such as malls, restaurants etc. It's also illegal to smoke within 20 metres of an entrance to any public place and it's even illegal to smoke in a car with passengers under the age of 18.

Nothing grinds my gears more than seeing someone smoking around kids who are too little to do or say anything about it. My husband smokes, but he never smokes in the house or the car. My mother and grandmother, who live together, smoke in the house. We live in Calgary now, but when we were home visiting, I didn't like going there because you could smell it before you got up to the front door. But when we were there, the smoked out on the porch, so I still took my daughter to visit.



It also drives me NUTS when I have to walk past people who are smoking right under a sign that says 'No Smoking within 20 metres'. I get that they have a right to do whatever they want to their own body, but my child and I have a right to breathe air that is not polluted with carcinogenic toxins. Take the time to walk that extra distance from the entrance so I can walk into the mall, the doctor's office, the grocery store etc. without having to hold my breath as I walk in.

Catherine - posted on 02/24/2010

Exactly, and they say that the poisons in cigarette smoke actually amplify the poisons in things like upholstery foam and carpet backing. So I just don't smoke in the house or car.

September - posted on 02/24/2010

I just have to also add that particularly smokers, have no idea that third-hand smoke, the cocktail of toxins that linger in carpets, sofas, clothes and other materials hours or even days after a cigarette is put out, is a health hazard for infants and children.

Wanda - posted on 02/24/2010

My husband smokes outside, he doesn't smoke in the car - even when my son and I aren't with him. If we're outside playing or going for a walk , then he'll have a smoke but since we're outside, I don't think it's that big of a deal.



My inlaws are smokers but they don't smoke in the house when we come for a visit, otherwise they do. I'm thankful that they don't smoke inside while we're there but I don't think I'd refuse to visit if they did (I'd probably cut down on visits and no overnight visits but I wouldn't refuse to visit).



My son has already been exposed to it (he's 2), I keep telling him it's a 'bad habit' and 'don't you do it' (as he gets older I'll be able to explain it better) so hopefully he'll get the idea it's bad at an early age.

September - posted on 02/24/2010

I don't feel that it's ever ok to smoke around children. Of course children get exposed to it but that does not mean that you can't try to avoid it especially within your own family!

Jackie - posted on 02/24/2010

I myself am a smoker but I quit long before I got pregnant and I started the nasty habit again when she about 3 months old.

I do not smoke in the house, in front of or around her or any other children for that matter.

Here is my take... You can help what she exposed to when it comes to family and close friends by removong her/him from a situation that you are not comfortable with. But sometimes you cannot help what she exposed to when it comes to everyday strangers. Like I wouldn't walk up to somebody at the mall smoking outside and tell them to put out their smoke because my kid is walking by.

Catherine - posted on 02/24/2010

I always say 'Once you become a parent, you also become a hypocrite.' I never smoke in front of my daughter, and rarely anywhere where she might smell it. It's a disgusting habit and we're all stupid for doing it. Why in God's name would I want my kid to see me do it? I'm her role model for everything.

Lady - posted on 02/24/2010

She's your child and they should resect your wishes. My mother and sister both smoke but would never do it around my children. Even when we go to their house they go in a seperate room or outside. I don't think people should ever smoke around kids.

Jackie - posted on 02/24/2010

I try to keep my daughter away from it as much as possible, while at the same time not sheltering her. I still take her everywehre and anywhere i want to go. If we go somewhere that people are actually smoking inside (which in the US is extremely rare) I will take her to another room, or as far from the smoke as we can get...and we just don't stay too too long. I don't keep her from our family members who do smoke, but I just keep the indoor visits short and sweet if they smoke in their houses. Yes they will be exposed to it, but theres no reason to increase that exposure just for fun. THe less the better if you ask me.

But my bigger issue would be that they are totally disrespecting your wishes as her mom. It shouldnt' be that hard for them to not smoke at least when she's around.

Sharon - posted on 02/24/2010

Once in a while. Like once a month.



One day smoking will be obsolete or replaced with a REAL non harmful alternative. Her grandparents are deluded.