Does the bible command parents to spank?

Tanya - posted on 06/28/2010 ( 52 moms have responded )

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I saw a few threads about this on the welcome page.

Do you believe that the bible says you must spank your children

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Minnie - posted on 06/29/2010

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What I don't get is how many Christians claim to be 'Christ-like' and yet display completely different attitudes toward their children than Christ did. His disciples complained all the time, were disobedient, faithless, lazy, and one betrayed him. Did he hit them to teach them? No. He admonished with words. He also said that whatever we do 'unto the least of these' we do unto him.



Much of the Bible is figurative. It's filled with exaggeration and poetic license in order to get the writer's words across. Take the Bible literally, and you're in a lot of trouble :). A people of a different time and culture wrote it to people of a different time and culture. One needs to understand this when attempting to figure out what the writer was trying to say.

Charlie - posted on 06/28/2010

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In regards to " spare the rod , spoil the child "



No , it isnt even in the bible a HUGE misconception , its a very old verse from a poem .



Notably most versus in the bible in regards to discipline refer to sons , does this mean only boys should be disciplined .



The bible does refer to whipping "He who loves his son will whip him often, so that he may rejoice at the way he turns out."



Shall we take this literally and chase our kids around with whips swinging over our heads , No IMO.





Any reference that does condone acts of aggression towards children in certain peoples eyes were words for another time, another place, and another people from which we have evolved past .

Rod verses - what they really mean. The following are the biblical verseswhich have caused the greatest confusion:



"Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him." (Prov. 22:15)



"He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him." (Prov. 13:24)



"Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish him with the rod, he will not die. Punish him with the rod and save his soul from death." (Prov. 23:13-14)



"The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to itself disgraces his mother." (Prov. 29:15)



At first glance these verses may sound pro-spanking. But you might consider a different interpretation of these teachings. "Rod" (shebet) means different things in different parts of the Bible. The Hebrew dictionary gives this word various meanings: a stick (for punishment, writing, fighting, ruling, walking, etc.). While the rod could be used for hitting, it was more frequently used for guiding wandering sheep. Shepherds didn't use the rod to beat their sheep - and children are certainly more valuable than sheep. As shepherd-author Philip Keller teaches so well in A Shepherd Looks At Psalm 23, the shepherd's rod was used to fight off prey and the staff was used to gently guide sheep along the right path. ("Your rod and your staff, they comfort me." – Psalm 23:4).



Jewish families we've interviewed, who carefully follow dietary and lifestyle guidelines in the Scripture, do not practice "rod correction" with their children because they do not follow that interpretation of the text.



The book of Proverbs is one of poetry. It is logical that the writer would have used a well-known tool to form an image of authority. We believe that this is the point that God makes about the rod in the Bible – parents take charge of your children. When you re-read the "rod verses," use the concept of parental authority when you come to the word "rod," ratherthan the concept of beating or spanking. It rings true in every instance.



While Christians and Jews believe that the Old Testament is the inspired word of God, it is also a historical text that has been interpreted in many ways over the centuries, sometimes incorrectly in order to support the beliefs of the times. These "rod" verses have been burdened with interpretations about corporal punishment that support human ideas. Other parts of the Bible, especially the New Testament, suggest that respect, authority, and tenderness should be the prevailing attitudes toward children among people of faith.



In the New Testament, Christ modified the traditional eye-for-an-eye system of justice with His turn-the-other-cheek approach. Christ preached gentleness, love, and understanding, and seemed against any harsh use of the rod, as stated by Paul in 1 Cor. 4:21: "Shall I come to you with the whip (rod), or in love and with a gentle spirit?" Paul went on to teach fathers about the importance of not provoking anger in their children (which is what spanking usually does): "Fathers, do not exasperate your children" (Eph. 6:4), and "Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will be discouraged" (Col. 3:21).

nowhere in the Bible does it say you must spank your child to be a godly parent.

Jodi - posted on 06/29/2010

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"If you are not a Christian you wouldn't get it and that's cool, but I wish people would leave it alone."

Christa, I find that rather insulting, because I AM Christian, and I don't get it. And I know I am not the only one. My interpretation is that the rod was to guide and discipline which may or may not include spanking, but it does not tell us to spank (similar to a shepherd guiding sheep with his crook). I am not anti-spanking, and I have spanked my children (I couldn't even tell you the last time I did), but I will own that decision and not say that it is ok to spank because the Bible said so. Because that's a cop out.

[deleted account]

Christa I agree with Jodi - I am a Christian and I do not understand it. The Bible does NOT say to spank your children but again this is down to interpretation and my interpretation is that as adults we should guide the young and discipline where applicable - nowhere does it say HOW to discipline.

Actually the Bible teaches tolerance of people and their mistakes and forgiveness for what they have done, it also teaches love and respect and I do not see how hitting another person is demonstrating any of these qualities!

Minnie - posted on 06/30/2010

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It seems to me that the Bible has a very negative view of children - that they WILL disobey, they WILL play up, they ARE little brats...



Or the Bible views children as people who need loving grace-filled guidance (just like adults do too) and it is certain Christians who have had their minds filled with the interpretations and traditions of patriarchal pastors and authors who have the negative view.

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 10/28/2012

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~~ADMIN ALERT~~



Old thread...locking it. Feel free to start a new one.



~PD&HT Admin Little Miss~

Monchelle - posted on 10/28/2012

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Spankings and abuse are two different things. You are not to simply beat on your child because they make you angry. Im sorry for those people who grew up in households like that. It is horrible but please dont get it confused. The bible tells you to correct, guide, and spank your child. Not out of anger, but in love. Every person is different. Therefore every child is differnt. Some need spankings more than others, while some dont need it at all. Thats where a parent's wisedom should kick in. I have 4 children. Some need it more than others at times. One of my daughters i only have to talk to, sometimes very firmly, and she gets it. My son understands after restrictions. One of my daughters seems to only heed to correction after a spanking. They all understand that i love them. I never use spanking as a first result.

My sibblings and i got spanking growing up and my mom and i are close. Spankings kept my brother out the street and on the right path. With the friends he chose, a stern talking to and restrictions wasnt enought. I tell you the truth, she had to spank him to keep him from grown up and beating someone else one day. It keeps children on track.

Stephanie Jo - posted on 07/12/2010

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The Bible says to correct your children.I am a Christian,I have used spanking,time out ect.I also believe that it is sad that those who bash Christians and the Bible.Amazing how people get off the subject that was asked.

Kimberly - posted on 07/02/2010

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I'm not sure if thats what the bible is saying, but I was raised on spanking and my dad was the bad guy. I grew up fearing my dad and as much as I keep telling myself that I will never do that to my kids for that same reason I find myself doing it anyways. I slap on the wrist is one thing but, If they do something drasticly horrible that they know is wrong I say yes give them there spanks, but ONLY on the butt and no where else!!

Christina - posted on 07/01/2010

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Discipline and spanking are two different things.
We, my hubby and I, do both. Our little girl gets her butt spanked when we have repeatedly warned her not to do something, such as throwing play doh on the floor. It's one smack but she knows we mean it. She gets discipline, too. Verbal warnings and losing something she likes as a consequence to unfavorable behavior is a constant. She understands both, and we use both.
I'm not sure if the Bible necessarily condones spanking. But teaching your kids discipline and how to respect others is a constant, as is setting a good example.

Morgan - posted on 07/01/2010

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i believe that you should spank your children but the bible does command it, it simply tells you that you should to show your children the right way, it says in the bible people who spare the rod dont love their children

Pam - posted on 07/01/2010

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The Bible tells us that we must discipline our children. If a child needs spanked then spank - if a time out stool works then use that. Not all children need spanked. It is not a form of punishment - our children don't need to be punished because they misbehave, they need to be told what they did wrong, asked if they knew it was wrong and disciplined appropriately. Our children learn what they see us do, if we make wrong choices / do what they are told not to do then they are going to follow our example, not our word. Hence the saying "walk the talk and talk the walk".
There is a big difference in spanking a child and beating a child so we must make sure and not cross the line. If the child has made you angry with what they have done, send them to their room until you calm down and then discipline them. Just make sure that they realize why they are being disciplined. Age is a big factor here.

[deleted account]

I'm not sure debating the exact meaning of "the rod" is really the issue for the Christian. I don't see how anything can be gained by arguing about discipline and symbols of authority v. a literal rod for people within the church.



A more sensible approach is to look at the words that came from Jesus himself, who is the ultimate symbol of authority for the Christian. "But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea." (Matt 18:6)



Also the this teaching that was directed at the early church. "do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4)



To me the issue isn't so much whether or not one should spank, it's more about being a good parent and not going against the above teachings. All methods of discipline have the potential to go against these teachings and parents should not act in such a way that is likely to provoke a child to anger or make them want nothing to do with the church as they get older. Wrongful or over use of spanking could result in this, but so could the actions of a non-spanking parent. It's a parents job to use common sense and do what's right by their own children by taking their individual needs into account.

Meghan - posted on 06/30/2010

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I think it means that you need to discipline your children, and not let them misbehave. Whether you have to spank them, or not. I personally spank, but it's because that works for me and my children. I also use time outs and other forms of discipline, so that I'm not always "beating" my kids. You can't always spank.

[deleted account]

Krista, I will try to explain my understanding of that... though it probably won't make a difference.

Has a newborn sinned? Of course not. Sinning is a willful decision. But... that child has been born into a world of sin and as he/she grows has the exact same potential for sin as every other person on the planet. That sinful potential is there from birth.

God gives us these kids to raise and hopefully teach them His ways and to turn to Him when they sin and try to make it right. Trouble w/ that is that the parents are sinners too...

I think we as parents are all just trying to do the best we can. Even those that 'blame' the Bible for their choice to spank. They don't see it as an excuse (IMO, of course). They see it as trying to do the job that God gave them.

I'm typing on my friend's laptop which really messes up my thought process. Hope I made at least a little sense. ;)

Tanya - posted on 06/30/2010

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Thanks for all you christian mommies who said that you spank because you decided to and to the ones who said the bible doesn't say that at all.

You have really given me something to think about.

To say that the rest of us just can't understand see like a cop out, but its probably ok given this time and cultural context.

Krista - posted on 06/30/2010

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I guess I just can't understand any sort of belief system that could look at a tiny newborn and consider him a "sinner" -- to me, that seems almost kind of warped. Babies don't sin. They're just pure, innocent need.

Nicole - posted on 06/30/2010

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Oh dear me...

I am Christian and I don't interpret the Bible as telling parents to spank. The Bible can always be interpreted to suit one's will. Especially, since so much of the Bible is written in parables. I think the best way to follow the Bible is to follow Christ's example. Christ ALWAYS taught with love and acceptance.

I have several arguments against spanking from a Christian point of view:

First, many of the verses (at least the ones I know of-I don't claim to be a scholar of the Bible or Theology) that people have perceived to condone spanking are all from the Old Testament. So was The Law of Moses ("an eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth..." -Exodus) and there are many practices in the Old Testament that many Modern Day Christians do not follow and believe were fulfilled by the crucifixion of Christ. Does this mean that the Old Testament is null and void? No, but I do think we have to use the Old Testament, the New Testament and the example of Christ to determine what type of Christians we should be. I think that when we take ONE verse out of either book to be so literal without taking into account other verses and the teachings and example of Christ, we are wielding the Bible to OUR will and not Heavenly Father's.

Second, why does the "rod" have to be literal? We know that many of Christ's teachings and the lessons of the Bible are in the form of parables. Not to mention, that the translation of the Bible has happened many times and specific words may sound one way in modern language, but meant another when the Bible was written. This is not to say that we can't trust the words in the Bible to be true, it just means, as I said before, that we have to use the WHOLE Bible not specific words/verses to lead us on the right path.

Third, in our faith, we are constantly told that when there is reference to the "rod" in the Bible it is meaning the "Word of God". We feel this way about the word "rod" in the Bible because anywhere else it is written (not pertaining to disciplining children) it doesn't make sense to use the word "rod" literally. So, if you look at it this way "Spare the rod, spoil the child" can mean "spare the Word of God, spoil the child". This means teaching through the Word of God, not through a literal rod.

Now, of course, this is just all another interpretation, but how we interpret Christ's example should be the same. Christ came here to be crucified for all of humanity and yet he wouldn't even condone the stoning of an adulteress. Would he have condoned physical punishment to small children?

I do not pretend to tell someone else how to parent and I am sure there are very loving parents out there who do spank, but something really rubs me the wrong way when people use the Bible's teachings to advocate their spanking. Especially since there is a way to raise children into upstanding, Christ-like, moral, and respective adults without the use of spanking. It has been done!

Minnie - posted on 06/30/2010

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So basically, let me whip your body so you will want to love God?



:/



we are all sinners including the smallest child and from day one there is a battle for their soul



Shouldn't, by your reasoning, husbands be able to spank their wives in order to turn their hearts to God?



If you are interested in learning more I recommend "Shepherding a Child's Heart" by Tedd Tripp. It explains what the bible says about discipline



Again, one getting one's theology from someone else's interpretation. Others might be interested in the following thread, notably post #4, which explains proper hermeneutics when evaluating a book: http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/co...



So if the intent behind a behavior is a sin towards God then they need correction



Spanking is not correction. Correction is: "we don't act like this. THIS is what we do instead."

Christa - posted on 06/30/2010

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There's too much that's been said to address everyone and I don't want to end up in a theology battle because those never end well. ;-) To those who were offended I didn't mean to offend, but I stand by my comments. If you are interested in learning more I recommend "Shepherding a Child's Heart" by Tedd Tripp. It explains what the bible says about discipline and yes spanking is a piece of the pie, but it's not the WHOLE pie. If you don't follow all of it then you are just beating your children and I think that's where many get it wrong and why this is such a controversial issue. It also explains why other methods are not biblical and it uses scripture to back up every claim.

I do want to address Kathy and Lisa's comments about kids. Kathy it's not that kids are brats, but that we are all sinners including the smallest child and from day one there is a battle for their soul. If you don't get in a set their focus to God then they are going the wrong way. Lisa, it's not about what’s "socially acceptable", it's about focusing on the child’s heart, not the behavior. You are making sure your child's heart is pointing towards God. So if the intent behind a behavior is a sin towards God then they need correction, if it's just childishness then they don't.

That's all I'll say on the matter because I'm sick of fighting this same fight with people who are not willing to open their hearts to the possibility of God. It is a waste of time. :(

Minnie - posted on 06/30/2010

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I often think of the woman caught in adultery standing in the midst of the crowd with the Sadduces...and Jesus says 'he who is without sin cast the first stone.'



And no one could do anything...



And then he tells her 'go and sin no more.'



That is it.



But we have Christian parents who see their immature wee ones, who have to battle with fast-growing bodies and minds and are not yet to the point that they can act socially acceptable all the time, make a mistake, and none of that Christ-like attitude is present; the child gets spanked for it.



:(

Tanya - posted on 06/30/2010

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I have seen some christian mom who are against the death penalty. I know the bible lays out many things that people should be stoned for. I do not know one person who has said yes we should still be stoning people.

These same christians will then turn around and say oh I have to spank my child. I just don't understand why you have to uphold one, but not the other.

[deleted account]

It seems to me that the Bible has a very negative view of children - that they WILL disobey, they WILL play up, they ARE little brats...

[deleted account]

On a side note... I was completely anti-spanking before I had kids and so was my cousin-in-law. His wife and my husband (now ex) were pro-spanking. We've all spanked our kids......

Minnie - posted on 06/29/2010

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Jesus is not their parent and was sent here to live as a human, not God. He had no authority to spank anyone that was not his purpose.

Quite a many Christians would disagree with you here- saying that Jesus was not God. But going along with your thought- parents are not God either. They are infallible, and if you believe the Bible, sinful human beings.

Our children are told by God to respect thy mother and father. That is what gives parents the authority to spank/punish our children as long as it is in accordance with God's will

You're talking about one concept and turning it into a completely different one; God simply telling a child to obey has nothing to do with a parent thinking he or she has the right to strike a child's body.

Remember that Christians are told to love their neighbors as themselves.

Amy - posted on 06/29/2010

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Back then there were no time outs and spanking whiping beating and stoning were the forms of punishment. In reference to biblical text I think God would prefer you to make your kids honor thy mother and father...if they are doing this as long as abuse is not present I do not think it matters how you choose to get this result.

Christa - posted on 06/29/2010

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Yes I do believe the bible says to spank your child. I do feel the rod verses cited are referring to spanking. However, there is a right way to spank and a wrong way. You must focus on all verses referring to discipline to do it correctly. You can't do it out of anger, you do it out of a biblical correction of their soul. If you are not a Christian you wouldn't get it and that's cool, but I wish people would leave it alone.

To whoever said Jesus didn't spank his disciples. . . Jesus is not their parent and was sent here to live as a human, not God. He had no authority to spank anyone that was not his purpose. Our children are told by God to respect thy mother and father. That is what gives parents the authority to spank/punish our children as long as it is in accordance with God's will. He has given us our children to be their stewards while here on earth. We are not to carry out our own will, but his. Again if you don't believe in the Christian faith then fine, but unless you understand it you won't understand this either.

Lesli - posted on 06/29/2010

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i agree with both Loureen & carol. I think it's up to the parent to chose the punishment, and i think it doesn't tell you to spank but to discipline.

i do believe in spanking to a point. i believe in the action of spanking, i do not think you should spank so hard you would leave marks... i think that when a kid is young, the only way to get to them is through physical handling them. I have a 10 year old stepson, my husband spanked moderately, never abusive and never to bully, but to correct. He stopped Spanking at about 7 or eight, and moved on to punishing with written sentences and other non violent methods. He is such a good kid, he never gets in trouble and is so respectful and fully understands right from wrong, and it really worked out for him. he barely remembers being spanked, and he is a very non violent person. Again, it's more act of spanking than the actual spanking that does it. Kids are not supposed to fear you, but respect you.

i think too many people cannot control themselves when it comes to physical punishment, and use the bible as an excuse...

[deleted account]

I agree with Laci the Bible does not say you must spank your children - only discipline them. The Bible can be interpretted to say pretty much what you want to take from it. We also need to remember that times have changed since the Bible was written.

LaCi - posted on 06/29/2010

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The bible commands discipline. It doesn't say you have to spank your children.

Krista - posted on 06/29/2010

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I agree with Dana. There are plenty of God-fearing Christians out there who do not spank their kids, so obviously they don't come and take away your crucifix and revoke your membership if you don't spank your kid. So if a Christian DOES choose to spank her kid, then that's her prerogative. But she should OWN her choice, and not say "But the Bible tells me to!" The Bible tells people to do a lot of things, which most people now disregard. So don't pull this bullshit act and pretend that you wouldn't spank your kids otherwise, but gosh darn it, you're just following God's law.

Lyndsay - posted on 06/29/2010

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I'm sure the Bible probably does tell you to spank your kids. I've never read the Bible, I'm not a Christian, and I sometimes do spank my child. I think people who use any holy book as justification for beating their child (ie: the woman who whacks her kid repeatedly with a woman spoon) is a coward and dispicable person.

[deleted account]

Just a reminder for those that think Christians are supposed to be perfect: Christians are humans too. They sin just like every other human on the planet.

Thank you. Now back to the regularly scheduled debate. ;)

[deleted account]

@ Loureen, I'm sorry, I meant to say that the only people that I know of who feel strongly about it are on the net. I'm speaking of people on both sides too.

There are people on the net who recommend pro-spanking books that are very scary. I wouldn't want anyone to think that everyone who reads the bible agrees with or even buys those books. Also there are anti spanking Christians who assume that anyone who has ever spanked their children is a bad Christian. The point I was making is that most Christians don't fall into either camp and neither do most non-Christians.

[deleted account]

Krista, what is your sick obsession with Chuck Norris? lmao ;)

The only thing I want to say is that I CANNOT stand it when someone uses THAT quote to defend their CHOICE to spank! Gah...

Jodi - posted on 06/29/2010

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Shannon, I actually don't think people are discussing whether they believe in spanking at all because that wasn't the question. I think it is more about using the Bible as an excuse to do so.

[deleted account]

We believe in spanking. Spanking works for our family & I will continue to no matter what anyone says or thinks... :-)

Jodi - posted on 06/29/2010

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Oh, I just realised I didn't truly answer the question, I only did so in a round about way....the Bible does NOT say you must spank your children. People who claim that just interpret it (or have been told to interpret it) that way.

Jodi - posted on 06/29/2010

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When you think about it, in order to be able to preach the bible, you actually have to be qualified.....

So how can anyone else presume to even have a clue how to interpret it when other spend years studying it to be able to make any attempt to interpret.

And really, interpretation of ANYTHING is subjective. The Bible, however, existed before half of the modern terminology that exists today, and it was written as a compilation MANY years after the original writings in Hebrew, so it is absolutely a work of interpretation (not I didn't call it a work of fiction.....)

[deleted account]

I was rasied Roman Catholic but now consider myself an athiest. From listening to the readings from the Bible I would say that it neither says to spank or not to spank. In my opinion we are meant to love one another therefore we should not hurt anyone else. And as for disciplining a child there are better ways to do so than spanking.

Charlie - posted on 06/29/2010

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"The only people who feel strongly about spanking are people on the net."

you realize those people dont actually just exist in internet land , they are real people who are expressing their real opinions .

Sarah - posted on 06/29/2010

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And this is one of the HUGE reasons I don't believe in the Bible!

It's exactly how Jen says, beat it enough and it will say anything.
I think people should leave the ancient book, written by MAN, out of it, and use their common sense! :)

[deleted account]

The bible doesn't command spanking, it doesn't condem it either. I personally don't think that spanking a child often is a good idea, but I don't think there's anything wrong with an occasional spanking. That is my opinion. I'm not going to attempt to disect scripture or anyone else religious text to get my own opinion accross. I've never met anyone in society who is anti spanking or pro spanking. Most people (Christian and non) just discipline the way they see fit and get on with it. The only people who feel strongly about spanking are people on the net.

[deleted account]

I believe the bible is like a torture victim - beat it enough and it will say anything.

Johnny - posted on 06/28/2010

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The results of corporal punishment, as described in the Bible:

It is probable that the passages in Proverbs describe Solomon's own parenting style when he raised his son Rehoboam. The Bible subsequently records the negative effect that this parenting style had on his son. Rehoboam became a widely hated ruler after his father's death. At one point, he had to make a hasty retreat to Jerusalem to avoid being assassinated by his own people:

1 Kings 12:13-14: "And the king [Rehoboam] answered the people roughly, and forsook the counsel of the old men which they had given him, and spake to them after the counsel of the young men, saying, My father made your yoke heavy, but I will add to your yoke: my father chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions." (ASV)

1 Kings 12:18: "Then king Rehoboam sent Adoram, who was over the men subject to taskwork; and all Israel stoned him to death with stones. And king Rehoboam made speed to get him up to his chariot, to flee to Jerusalem." (ASV)

These same events are recorded in 2 Chronicles 10:6-19.

It can be argued that:

-The passages in Proverbs probably accurately and precisely portray Solomon's parenting style.
- As an adult, Solomon's son Rehoboam, was vicious, unfeeling, inconsiderate to his subjects, had no regard for human rights, and was widely hated. He barely escaped assassination at the hands of his own people.

Perhaps the Bible's true message here is:
- If you don't want your children to grow up to be like Rehoboam, then you should not follow Solomon's parenting style, as it is accurately described in the Bible.
- You should avoid using spanking or any other form of corporal punishment.
- These conclusions seem to agree with recent studies which indicate that one out of every three boys has a genetic problem that will almost certainly cause him to engage in criminal or anti-social acts later in life if he is physically abused. It is unknown what level of corporal punishment will push these children over the edge and make them become violent and aggressive as adults.

http://www.religioustolerance.org/spanki...

[deleted account]

COMMANDED to spank, no. COMMANDED to discipline (and punish, which CAN include spanking, when neccessary), yes.

[deleted account]

"Spare the rod and spoil the child,"
Is an adaptation from six verses from King Solomon's book of Proverbs:
Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying. (Proverbs 19:18)

Both of these verses appear in the Contrast of Goodness and Evil. From the Warnings and Instructions come the following four verses:

Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him. (Proverbs 22:15)

Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. (Proverbs 23:13)

15 The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame. 17 Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul. (Proverbs 29:15, 17)

You will not find in the Bible the exact words of the "proverb" you hear today. Instead, you will hear King Solomon's contrast of good and evil and his warnings and instructions. Consider the message of the verses.

In 13.24 you find that if you do not discipline your child, you hate him. If you love him, you discipline him when necessary. *Note that the word for "rod" here is the same word as "frond", meaning then a palm branch, not the iron rod with which the kings ordered prisoners flogged.

In 19.18 you find that you should chastise your child early while he is still impressionable (good). (Evil) You should not fail (spare) to chastise your child because he cries or is remorseful.

In 22.15 you find that a child is not born with a moral compass or the knowledge to know his actions are folly. Discipline will teach him.

In 23.13 you find that if you discipline your child to teach him values and morals, he will not fall into iniquity (evil) and die (eternal damnation).

In 29.15 you find that discipline and knowledge (reproof) will keep your child from bringing shame upon the family. In 17, you find if you discipline your child, he will behave always and be a child with whom you can be happy.

In no way, shape or form does Solomon profess abusing a child, but instead, shows that failure of the parent to discipline the child and teach the child to follow the law will be the downfall of the child and parent alike. Solomon does not profess that the use of the "rod" is enough. He states that the reproof is necessary to teach the child. Finally, Solomon assures parents that if they will raise their children to be lawful members of the society, they will bring great joy.

Many parents who use either these Scriptures or the adage in the discipline of their children find out that Solomon was onto something. When you begin the discipline with the physical, which the child can understand, you will get to a point where the reproof is all you need. Know that in absence of understanding of speech, pain is the receptor implanted in the human body to warn of ill action.

Finding of remorse or fear of retribution is inadequate as discipline. Children will cry in the face of consequences to actions. This should not deter the parent from discipline.

Regardless of religious pursuit, parents are the ones with the responsibility to discipline their children. Parents are also warned that if they fail their children, those children will bring shame upon them. This fact is bared in today's society, as it was in the past. Parents are given options on how to discipline their children. Ultimately, the parents must make the choice.

He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. (Proverbs 13:24)

Tanya - posted on 06/28/2010

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If you are spanking based on the bible than you should also be following every other rule of the old testament.

When a woman has a discharge of blood, which is her regular discharge from her body, she shall be in her impurity for seven days, and whoever touches her shall be unclean until evening." -- Leviticus 15:19-20

So do all of you bible based spankers lock yourselves away when you are "unclean"

Deuteronomy 22:23-24

If within the city a man comes upon a maiden who is betrothed, and has relations with her, you shall bring them both out of the gate of the city and there stone them to death: the girl because she did not cry out for help though she was in the city, and the man because he violated his neighbors wife.

So rape victims should be stoned if they don't scream when it happens?

Would you stone your rebellious teenager?

The list of crazy old testament laws goes on and on.

Why is are some of them still valid and others are outdated?

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