Have an 8 mos old baby Pregnant AGAIN!!! worried how it will affect my 1st baby

Totmom - posted on 06/24/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )

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1st ababy emotionally I worried about the effects this may have on my first child. I really want to make sure I give each child their quality alone time with mommy and I feel badly as if they are giving up their crowns too quickly. I want to be able to divivde my time evenly with all of my children because thats what they need and deserve. Is this a normal concern and if so, what are the things I can do to make sure my first baby gets all the love they need. Please help because I just don't want this baby coming to have a negative effect on my first child's life .I don't want the first baby to resent the new baby or feel jealous . PLease moms out there....... has this happened to you? I need some advice on tips to make sure my 1st child never reals left out or unloved. I'm open to listening your suggestions and thank you so much for your time

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Neva - posted on 06/24/2012

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I think that your 1st child will do just fine. That's not to say that he won't be jealous or feel left out at times. Jealousy is normal. He would be jealous no matter how much of an age difference. Your first child might regress a little, cry more, be more clingy, etc. First born children have always had their mother's undivided attention, so when another child comes along, there will likely be a period of adjustment. You can help your first through this period by talking to him a lot about the baby before it arrives, even if you think he's too young to understand. Keep his routine as much as possible, too. Being close in age can actually be easier than waiting a few years even though it will be busy for you at first.

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Claire - posted on 08/24/2012

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My brother and I are 13 months apart. I was 4 months when my mom got pregnant with my brother, and honestly, it was great! We were very close and still are. He was my first best friend when I was a kid, so I wouldnt worry about it too much

Crystal - posted on 08/19/2012

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I just had my first but I feel you will be fine just like some of these other moms said have the oldest involved if you need help but make sure you try to also do age appropriate things with him/her so he/she doesn't try to go back into baby mode. I have faith in every mother and you are no different :)

Julie - posted on 07/04/2012

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My brother and I are 18 months apart, and we were super close and best of friends! it was such a great relationship that I thought I'd want the same for my kids.

Of course, once my first was nine months old I realized NO WAY. But "Irish Twins" are more common than you think. It will not be ideal or easy for you, but the relationship can turn out great :)

Brandy - posted on 06/26/2012

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I have two sets of children that were born before they were 2 years old.My oldest one was 6 months old when I found out I was 2 months along.They fight like cats and dogs but they are now teens.They were just 14 months apart.My youngest ones are so much easier and they are 15 months apart.They have a special bond.Of course one is gonna be jealous of the other.It is to be expected even with kids so far apart too.They feel like they are no longer the baby and mommy and daddy are spending more time.Not that we love them any less.I have all four of my daughters trying to compete for my affection and when one wants something the other feels like she has to have it.It also it like that if you tell one you love them then you MUST tell the other one cause the one that you didn't say it to will be asking don't you love me too mommy.Not meaning to leave them out because I had one in my lap and the other one was watching TV or so I thought. :) You will do just fine! I am sure of it.If you have anymore questions you can always come back here and just ask.:)

Cherish - posted on 06/25/2012

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My daughter was 6 months old when I got preg w/my 3rd child.Babies don't do much for the first 6 months,so you will have the entire preg and the first 6 months of "quality time" with your first baby.
And as ridiculous as it sounds,you can have your first baby "help" with the new baby(like handing you a diaper or a toy),and toddlers LOVE helping.

I do not think my daughter was jealous...don't worry it's fine.
My oldest was 9 when my daughter was born and she was 14 months old when my youngest was born..it is ALOT easier having them close together.

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