Honest opinions only PLEASE...Check the hatred and judging at the door!!!

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Jenny - posted on 03/11/2010

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I'd like to see the students band together and DEMAND their prom from their school. How dare they tell these students they are not entitled to one of the most important nights of a teen's life because of politics? Let her wear a tux, dance with her girlfriend and celebrate her hard work at school. Let them ALL celebrate.

&Under no circumstances should these girls have to mask, lie about or hide any part of their identity for the sake of "not stirring the pot". These types of incidents occur as we move towards a culture of equality and acceptance. However, we will not be heading that way if we just roll over and let administors tell us how we can and can not be ourselves in public. The school district can suck eggs.

Krista - posted on 03/11/2010

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I think there is a bit of a difference though, Shelby.

She just wants to go to the prom with her girlfriend. She's not asking the other students to become gay or lesbian. She's not asking the other girls to wear tuxedos. She wants the other students to be able to do what they like, wear what they like, and go to the prom with whomever they like -- she just wants that same consideration.

That's where your prayer analogy fails, because as far as I'm aware, if a Christian student wishes to pray, there really isn't a rule against that. There just isn't an official, school-wide time to do it anymore. So I really fail to see how Christians' rights are being impeded upon at all. But that's a separate debate.

Shelby - posted on 03/11/2010

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Jenny,I'm quoting you...Hope that is o.k.

QUOTE
"&Under no circumstances should these girls have to mask, lie about or hide any part of their identity for the sake of "not stirring the pot". These types of incidents occur as we move towards a culture of equality and acceptance. However, we will not be heading that way if we just roll over and let administors tell us how we can and can not be ourselves in public. "
END QUOTE

Wouldn't these "rights" to be whoever you are, be afforded to EVERYONE? Even Christian children who are not allowed to have prayer at school? I'm all for everyone deserving of the "SAME" treatment, Yet I feel it is very hypocritical to only support "SOME" rights, not all.

So honest question here, What is the difference in students (all willing, and consenting) being forbidden to have a prayer on school ground, and her being denied a same sex date to Prom? Not EVERYONE is on the same page on either subject, so shouldn't the schools just stay out of it all together?

Shelby - posted on 03/11/2010

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My personal take on this...



DISCLAIMER__________ This is only MY personal opinion, I do not want to get attacked for MY opinion, NO ONE knows my personal story so please don't judge.



I agree 100% with the school opting out of hosting a school funded exta curricular activity. If it is school funded I believe that EVERYONE should be considered, Not just the majority, not just the minority, but EVERYONE...In this case you can't make everyone happy, therefore calling off a school funded Prom, and encouraging the community to come together to give the children this, is exactly what should have happened.



Personally, I am a Christian, I know exactly what the bible says about homosexuality. I also read the parts of the bible where it says it is not up to us to judge another...There is only one who has that authority. You can hate the sin, not the sinner...All that. I don't travel around locating atheists and going to their door with a bible asking them if they are ready to be saved. I am not a hard core bible thumper and am by nature a sinner.



My children are no longer allowed to pray in school because not everyone supports it, and ALL must be taken into consideration. I don't see how this is any different. I don't feel the girls are being discriminated against. The school district is taking the only option it has. NOT EVERYONE can be satisfied with this predicament. I think its sad, yes, but not everyone can have their own way. If the school had held the prom and denied access to the girls, YES that would be discriminatory. Its simple enough to say well if no one else liked it, they didn't have to attend, but thats not exactly fair either.



Schools, and the teachers, administrators today walk a VERY thin line, and personally I don't want their job. I don't know how the handle trying to make sure EVERYONE is happy ALL the time. I personally believe as christians, We are pretty much screwed. But, this MUST be taken into account, that there are still Christians out there. As much as christianity is trying to survive eradication, It does still exist. Their rights and beliefs should also be taken into consideration.



These girls were not denied anything that anyone else received freely. Prom was simply cancelled. I agree whole-heartedly that the community should take a stance and provide these kids with the chance at a "rite of passage" that so many have enjoyed before them...Then whoever wants to attend can...Whoever doesn't want to go, doesn't have to go, but the school system itself had to remove itself from the front lines.



However you feel about homosexuality, or Christianity, it doesn't matter. Whether it be hatred or the scripture that make some people NOT support homsexuality, it is as much their right, as the girls who wanted to go as a same sex couple.



Now if this happened at my son's high school, I would be the first on the phone asking for community support to host the Prom. Schools are not REQUIRED to provide extra curricular activities to ANYONE much less just a few.

Geralyn - posted on 03/17/2010

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Susanne, you missed the whole point when you said that the girl "knew the rules." The policy that the school district was acting under was discriminatory and violative of the civil rights of the gay and lesbian students. Policies, rules, even laws - yes, laws! - are struck down by courts as unconstitutional or violative of civil rights - either as written or as implemented. This 18-year old is thrust into litigation and media circles only because she wanted to attend her prom like other teenagers.

It was not her intent to alienate her peers - although its pretty obvious from the mentality of the school district, which most likely trickles down to the individuals in the community - parents and students alike - that she was "alienated" before the prom incident.

I am puzzled as to how you, Suzanne, could think she was not furthering the gay rights cause by standing up - at the risk of more hatred and alienation - against a policy that was violative of her civil rights on its face. How could she possibly be furthering the gay "agenda" by going to the prom with a male friend or by herself pretending not to be with her significant other.

Teenagers do not "choose" to be gay or lesbian. There is the potential for everyone's child to be gay or lesbian, that is the reality, like it or not. And yes, teenagers are frequently driven "underground" because of the views or their parents FIRST and society SECOND. Teenagers commit suicide quite commonly because of not being accepted based upon their sexual orientation.

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LaCi - posted on 03/18/2010

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I'd raise hell.

When I was in high school my cousin wanted to bring her girlfriend to prom, and the school did have a problem with it. However, they would not have cancelled prom over it. She ended up bringing her girlfriend anyway, in drag complete with fake facial hair. It was amusing.

I don't really understand why she didn't just go to prom with her girlfriend like it was not a big deal, because it shouldn't be. What the school did was absolutely uncalled for, and I'm glad the hotel in New Orleans stepped up to host their prom.

I have so many thoughts on this but its just way too early for me to type coherently lol

Ashley - posted on 03/18/2010

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i disagree with the school completely.. but they were smart in cancelling the prom before they lost a huge lawsuit that ould have made it to the supreme court.. as it has before. this has been an ongoing problem for years, and to this day it's illegal for a school to say she can't bring the same sex, and as long as her outfit isn't "disrupting the education process" or threatening a student or staff members well being, that is also allowed.

[deleted account]

She could have gone to the prom just like everyone else shes the one who made it a big deal by wanting to make sure everyone knew she was gay and wear something different. Yes she has damaged gay rights in her community because the majority of class mates will bear a grudge against her and reflect that onto the whole gay community. Also the school told her that they'd cancel if she insisted on carrying on so yes it was partly down to her if she wasnt so selfish she would have backed down for the good of her friends. We dont live in a world where gays arent discriminated against and i dont think we ever will so if she chooses to go as public as she did she has to expect people to not like it.

Kim - posted on 03/17/2010

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I'm pretty sure the students that would have attended the prom already knew about her as a person (that she was gay). Only people with the problem seems to be the adults who wouldnt of been at the event.

Brittany - posted on 03/17/2010

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i think the whole thing is ridiculous. i graduated high school in 2007 in missouri. in my school we had "spirit weeks" before big football or basketball games...where we all had to dress in school colors or wear certain t shirts or something. but at least once a year there was a day set aside when boys (some male teachers included) would wear dresses and come to school for the day. we had plenty of boys (some not even gay) that would wear womens jeans to school...or girls who would wear boys clothes to school. so long as she was properly covered (which she would have been more than so in a tux) then there should be no problem!!!

Jessie - posted on 03/17/2010

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This is a hard situation. The school does have rules and I know plenty of Gay couples that have attended proms and events together that didn't do it under the radar they just attended and didn't make a big deal of it. I don't agree with homosexuality but don't discriminate. However, schools have rules that effect a lot of the people not just gay and lesbians. What about no prayer in school? Telling kids that they can't pray in school to me is just as bad as this. It's deciding who a child should or shouldn't be. I sympathize with all the kids that don't get to go to prom but I can kind of see both sides. I really don't think either should of made the issue this big and think that maybe if they had just let them attend and adhere to a dress code that this could of been avoided. The school does have a right to have them adhere to a dress code, they do during the school week and should be able to at functions.

Krista - posted on 03/17/2010

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I think this girl is being incredibly selfish, why should everyone else have to go without a prom so that she could make a point.


I'm sorry -- please let me know where it was the girl's decision to cancel prom. Because last I checked, it was the school who made that decision. The girl just wanted to attend prom, and wanted her fellow classmates to attend as well. In fact, your sentence can VERY easily be amended to "I think the school is being incredibly selfish, why should everyone else have to go without a prom so that they can make a point?"

Yes she should be able to take who she wants and dress how she wants in an ideal world but she knew the rules and as someone else here said she could have gone anyway with her partner not made a big fuss and no one would have known either way or cared.


You mean that ideal, utopian world where gays aren't discriminated against? I know...what a crazy thought, expecting a publicly funded school to uphold its students civil rights.

The school cant win whatever they do so i dont blame them for saying well lets do nothing at all then.


Poppycock. Please tell me how the school would have "lost" by allowing her to come to the prom in her tux with her girlfriend.

[deleted account]

I think this girl is being incredibly selfish, why should everyone else have to go without a prom so that she could make a point. Yes she should be able to take who she wants and dress how she wants in an ideal world but she knew the rules and as someone else here said she could have gone anyway with her partner not made a big fuss and no one would have known either way or cared. As it is shes alienated all of her fellow students and not helped the gay rights cause at all. The school cant win whatever they do so i dont blame them for saying well lets do nothing at all then.

Krista - posted on 03/17/2010

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Geralyn put it perfectly. It's really quite disgusting that they would cancel the prom altogether, rather than (oh, horrors!) let in a lesbian couple. The school is acting like a bratty toddler, taking its ball and going home, rather than playing fair.

Geralyn - posted on 03/17/2010

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How disturbing. It is not a question of making everyone happy all the time. Its a question of whether the school district was going to use public funds to support an activity at the exclusion of an identified, protected class of people for discriminatory motives, whether or not you personally believe that gays and lesbians should be a protected class. A school district cannot discriminate when it uses public funds for a school event, period. When it learned about the legal ramifications of its action (its policy) and that it could not discriminate, it decided rather than allow access to an "undesireable" class/minority that it would simply cancel the prom and encourage private individuals who are free to discriminate against the protected class to host an exclusionary prom. That is certainly one way to get around potential civil rights violations. Pure hatred and retaliation on the part of the school district.

[deleted account]

here is a short clip from the view episode this morning...its only about 2 min long im looking for a longer one

Hannah - posted on 03/16/2010

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Quoting Shelby H,
"I agree 100% with the school opting out of hosting a school funded exta curricular activity. If it is school funded I believe that EVERYONE should be considered, Not just the majority, not just the minority, but EVERYONE...In this case you can't make everyone happy, therefore calling off a school funded Prom, and encouraging the community to come together to give the children this, is exactly what should have happened.

Personally, I am a Christian, I know exactly what the bible says about homosexuality. I also read the parts of the bible where it says it is not up to us to judge another...There is only one who has that authority. You can hate the sin, not the sinner...All that. I don't travel around locating atheists and going to their door with a bible asking them if they are ready to be saved. I am not a hard core bible thumper and am by nature a sinner.

My children are no longer allowed to pray in school because not everyone supports it, and ALL must be taken into consideration. I don't see how this is any different. I don't feel the girls are being discriminated against. The school district is taking the only option it has. NOT EVERYONE can be satisfied with this predicament. I think its sad, yes, but not everyone can have their own way. If the school had held the prom and denied access to the girls, YES that would be discriminatory. Its simple enough to say well if no one else liked it, they didn't have to attend, but thats not exactly fair either.

Schools, and the teachers, administrators today walk a VERY thin line, and personally I don't want their job. I don't know how the handle trying to make sure EVERYONE is happy ALL the time. I personally believe as christians, We are pretty much screwed. But, this MUST be taken into account, that there are still Christians out there. As much as christianity is trying to survive eradication, It does still exist. Their rights and beliefs should also be taken into consideration.

These girls were not denied anything that anyone else received freely. Prom was simply cancelled. I agree whole-heartedly that the community should take a stance and provide these kids with the chance at a "rite of passage" that so many have enjoyed before them...Then whoever wants to attend can...Whoever doesn't want to go, doesn't have to go, but the school system itself had to remove itself from the front lines.

However you feel about homosexuality, or Christianity, it doesn't matter. Whether it be hatred or the scripture that make some people NOT support homsexuality, it is as much their right, as the girls who wanted to go as a same sex couple.

Now if this happened at my son's high school, I would be the first on the phone asking for community support to host the Prom. Schools are not REQUIRED to provide extra curricular activities to ANYONE much less just a few."


Shelby, I fully agree with you. Couldn't have said it better.

Heather - posted on 03/15/2010

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They were talking about this story this morning on the View...anyone see it??? I actually missed it...my son poured juice all over himself and I had to give his little sticky butt a bath lol

Caitlin - posted on 03/15/2010

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I went to my female friend's senior prom when I was a sophomore, and our administration was perfectly OK with it. She was required to register me as her guest with my name and school ID number, so clearly they knew I was a female going to prom with a female. No one said anything about it. This is COMPLETELY ridiculous, and whether you approve of homosexuality or not, it is not a choice, people do not CHOOSE to be something that still today is condemned in society as "abnormal". Your disapproval is not going to change anything. Saying that it is OK for the school to say that sexual orientation is a big enough issue to CANCEL a prom to me indicates that you are so closed minded you can't accept the fact that not everyone does things the way you do, and you aren't OK with that. How disgusting. Do you see gay people saying straight people are wrong? No. So why should we say they're wrong?

Julia - posted on 03/15/2010

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Ok first off didn't read all of the posts on this subject...don't know if it has been brought up or not sorry....got other things to do right now but I need to say something about this.

HOW is this any different from a group of girls going stag? Or a group of guys going stag? I remember my proms that I went to and a number of girls and guys went together as a group. Hell best friends would go together and my school allowed them to buy couples tickets. (Once again not in the bible belt but still this was 12 + years ago) Is it simply from the fact that the girls have said this is my girlfriend and we want to go as a couple? Completely ridiculous.

Heather - posted on 03/15/2010

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I honestly am not surprised by this story, I mean the South is not exactly known for its history of tolerance! This is just sad to me that this type of intolerance still exists...IMO the school district did this to punish this girl for being gay. Their decision was rooted in their own religious beliefs (whether they admit that or not) I think it was done to make a point and to keep this from happening again. Its bullying and it is a bunch of self righteous christians using the bible to justify being bigots. I thought the bible taught acceptance and love...I thought thats what being a christian is all about...sharing gods love with the world...unless your gay and live in mississippi I guess. My HS had many gay kids in it...and they were all allowed to go to prom. My friend Steve even wore a dress, and this was way back in 94 lol Oh and we also had kids who openly prayed every morning before school, around the flag pole, it was called "see you at the pole" and it was a national thing I think. We also had student led bible groups both before and after school...there is room in society for everyone.

[deleted account]

Its not like that here...Children are not allowed to have prayer in school, at no school function or game. There was a graduating class at my high school where students were denied public receipt of their diplomas because the chose to carry their bible on stage "UNDER" their gowns, They weren't preaching, nor reading from it...

Here, my children can't sing Silent Night at the schools winter concert, but they can sing "Oh Hanukkah" So my point is either EVERYONE is entitled to individual rights, or EVERYONE has to follow policy.






UNITED STATES LAWS ON PRAYER AND RELIGION IS SCHOOLS



Praying in school is not against the law. In fact, the U.S. Constitution guarantees students the right to pray in public schools; it is a protected form of free speech. A student can pray on the school bus, in the corridors, in the cafeteria, in their student-run Bible club, at the flagpole, sports stadium, and elsewhere on school grounds. They can even pray silently before and after class in the classroom. They are not allowed to pray solely Christian prayers as an organized part of the school schedule. However, they may be able to hear or read prayers from a variety of religious traditions and inspiring statements from secular sources. Prayers cannot solely be from a single religious faith group.



Students are allowed wide latitude in dress and jewelry, including religious clothing and accessories.



The Bible is not outlawed. The U.S. Constitution protects students' freedom of speech. They can quote freely from the Bible in their essays and projects.



As long as the prayer is student lead then schools are allowed to hold a public prayer before a sporting event or other school sponsored event.



The teacher can read passages from the Bible can even be read in the classroom, as part of a comparative religion class. But they have to be balanced with passages from the texts of other religions and from secular movements.



Ethics and morality can be taught in school. But they cannot be taught from the perspective of a single branch of a single religion. The full range of beliefs of right and wrong need to be included.



The Ten Commandments can be taught; they can even be posted on the walls of public schools. However, they must not appear by themselves. Other religious rules of behavior and secular laws must accompany the Ten Commandments to give a balanced cultural display.

Amber - posted on 03/14/2010

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I believe that they should have kept the prom going and let the girl bring who she wanted and wear what she wanted. If they have a problem with it then they need to bring it up with her and her parents and not punish the rest of the school. I also believe that that girl should beable to bring who ever she wants to her prom. Its a once in a life time thing and she deserves to enjoy it just like everyother high school student.

[deleted account]

One of these days Mississippi will emerge from the swamp, scrap the mud off its fur and take its place in the sun with the rest of humanity.



Give me a friggen' break...How is the sexual orientation of students the business of a public school? Where do they get the idea that they can make any kind of decision about such a thing? I'm married and have children, but I still can't understand how this matter is any business of the school at all. Control freaks. Why is it anybody else's business?



What's the diff. tux or the barely there dresses some of the straight girls wear?? let them have cake!!! and the prom. This is the world , you might as well get over it. We live in a beautiful colorful world. Why make trouble for others because they do not live the way you do??? Freedom of speech and all that. The school created the problem not the girls. The other students need to protest to the school board. The students need to stand up for each other. The school has let them attend the school why not the Prom??? What is the difference here. School functions go on all year sponsored by them and I am sure that Contance and her partner have gone to those!! She could of just attended the Prom and not asked about it first. She is going to be a strong women when she gets older. Let me make myself clear. This is a public school we're talking about. Any opportunities it provides, be it social or athletic, cannot be withheld from a targeted population. Constance wanted to take her girlfriend, dance, have fun with her friends, and do all the things her peers get to do. Nothing they wanted to do was inherently wrong, but it is proscribed by some people's religious tenets. Again, it's a public school, and the board cannot made decisions based on religion. The girls weren't going to "shove their sexuality in your face" or initiate a protest in the middle of the dance. The girls merely wanted to join in, have fun, and act like teenagers just like everyone else at the dance.



The moronic, homophobic school baord should be voted out at the earliest possible election. "The school board statement said it wouldn't host the event "due to the distractions to the educational process caused by recent events" Since when is the Prom an educational process? And who created the distraction...the board, not the girl. If the board minded it's own business, instead of sticking it's holier than thou nose in anyone's personal business, there wouldn't have been a story to begin with. I think its great shes only suing for ONE dollar lol...proves there's no other reason behind the suit than her equal rights a a student and HUMAN BEING!



Go Contance......

[deleted account]

Oh come on! Her and her girlfriend aren't doing any harm! My best friend took her parnter (who is old enough to be her father) to our school ball/prom and there was no fuss about that!

For goodness sakes, its 2010 not 1950!

[deleted account]

@ my HS 10yrs ago one of my female friends wore a tux, but she had a male date? I think its funny this is an issue... I probably would have went at this with more tact...bought seperate tickets, wore a woman's suit...but I applaud her for what she is doing because she is paving the way for every person to freely go w/whoever they want which is more stand up then bending the rules but still abiding! Of course I think I would have been fighting this much earlier in the school year so as not to be an issue now...I think the school should hold the prom because unless the ACLU holds it I don't think that girl will get an invite! The backlash she will have is BS and its appaling that schools still have segregated dances? GEEZUS!!!

Ppl prayed in my school...the thing of it was NO teacher or adult could participate, it had to be student led and no one could be pushy or nothing...I agree that this is a seperate issue though...I think we bow down to Christians APLENTY!

Amy - posted on 03/12/2010

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my senior year a group of us didn't get dates and all went together and sat at the table together. how is it different if we were from different schools - whether lesbian or not? Next they're going to say that students can't bring a friend and any person not allowed to bring a friend was emotionally scarred because she couldn't invite her BFF because she's from another school and no boy who she asked said yes. I think people just need something to complain about. If we take away so many rights to make sure everyone is happy - pretty soon we will have no rights at all and no one will be happy.

[deleted account]

News flash:

A hotel owner in New Orleans offered to host a free prom for the Mississippi school. He is even providing transportation from what I can understand.

There has been backlash against this girl from her fellow classmates. Sad.

Katherine - posted on 03/11/2010

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Mississippi is like the bible belt, especially if it's such a small community. That being said, what they did still wasn't ok. Can I just say it's 2010 people! Really? Being gay is such a shocker still?

Melissa - posted on 03/11/2010

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I agree with Shavanne, im glad to be Canadian. People are allowed to be who they are. I think that school should be shut down for discrimination. Who cares if it was her lesbian partner. When i went to dances in school i went with my friends, i didn't have dates. What if it had of been just 2 friends who didn't have dates. A students sexual orientation is really none of the schools business. Its unfortunate there are still ignorant people out there.

Johnny - posted on 03/11/2010

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It just makes me sad that this sort of discrimination is allowed and promoted. But I guess since there are still schools out there holding segregated proms, I shouldn't be too surprised. Parts of America are certainly stuck in the 1930's. Yikes! Like Shauvane said, I'm sure glad I live in Canada where people can freely practice their religions and their sexualities. Way back in 1994 there were 2 gay male couples who attended our dinner/dance (prom equivalent). There was a girl who came wearing a hijab and escorted by her dad because of her religion. No one batted an eye and we all had an amazing time.

[deleted account]

I agree 100% with "Shelby H". about homosexuality. I too am a Christian. But, I am glad the school took a stand. It seem lately that schools allow too much. Kids can dress like sluts if they want, there are schools that have a "smoking area" just off campus. Kids can't pray. Etc. I agree with the school.

Krista - posted on 03/11/2010

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I just find it incredibly bizarre that the school even thinks it's their business who the students bring as dates. I brought my best male friend, who lived 5 hours away. Another girl there brought her boyfriend, who was in his sophomore year at university. Our school didn't give a sweet damn who we brought as our dates, and they didn't give a sweet damn what we wore, as long as our junk wasn't hanging out. They just didn't want us drinking, which realistically, would be a lot more "disruptive" than some chick's tuxedo.

Rosie - posted on 03/11/2010

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i find it utterly ridiculous. what type of policy is it to have a date of the opposite sex to go to prom. what about the nerds who can't get a date? or someone who just wasn't asked? are they supposed to stay home and feel bad for themselves? why shouldn't they be allowed to go to prom either?



this country is the most hypocritical, backwards country in the world. how are we a free country, when everybody is not afforded the same rights? as for christians not being able to pray in school. as far as i'm aware they are still allowed to go to school and school events. they can still pray before their meal. seperation of church and state is what is legal in this country-unfortunately this law apparently doesn't apply when it comes to homosexuality. i think it's utterly ridiculous, that gay people can (secretly, ssshhhh don't tell anyone) fight for our freedoms, yet they can't attend high school prom. i think our countrys voters are on crack.

Charlene - posted on 03/11/2010

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I think this whole thing is stupid.

For my semi-formal (junior prom) a girl wore a t-shirt and jeans because she wasn't comfortable wearing a dress. I don't see why her wearing a tux is such a big deal.

For our High School Prom, we could take anyone, as long as we told them who we were taking and the person was not over a certain age. There were a couple of same sex couples and a couple of girls who brought platonic girlfriends from other schools. Again.. I don't see the big deal.



If this had happened at my school, you can bet your buttons that there would not only have been a student led protest, but there would be a lot of angry parents calling for some people to lose their jobs for the discrimination.

Jessica - posted on 03/11/2010

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I think it shouldn't matter if she wanted to wear a suit or not, cause realistically i bet not many of the other students would have cared enough to think twice.... If wearing a suit is making a statment and may offend people..then you kind of have to get into nitty gritty stupid details such : A rich kid can't wear a super fancy blingy dress for show to the prom cause a pourer girl may be sad and stressed out that hers isn't as pretty. That would sound really ridiculous right? Well so does this.. and the way people all dress today anyways....a suit? Who cares!? I bet that some of the straight sterotypical "hot chicks" would have showed up in dresses that barely covered there ass...but they are straight...so thats ok right.....bah.

[deleted account]

Alison, why do you think it was right for the school to deny this girl to attend her prom with her partner?


I don't think the fact that she was attending with her partner is the worst thing in the world, the fact that she was making a statement and wanting her partner to dress in the suit is what bothered the school. You have to consider that fact that the school was placed in a difficult position where they were going to offend someone no matter what they did.

I've never been to that kind of a prom where you take a date, but I got the impression from the movies that this is they way it's done. Perhaps it would be better if they got rid of the whole idea of prom dates and just encouraged people to go with their friends. That way it wouldn't matter who she attended with. It would also do away with so much stress for everyone who can't get a date.

Jenny - posted on 03/11/2010

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From the update:

All I want is the same chance to enjoy my prom night like any other student. But my school would rather hurt all the students than treat everyone fairly," McMillen said in a prepared statement. "This isn't just about me and my rights anymore - now I'm fighting for the opportunity of all the students at my school to have our prom."

I hope the school is real proud of themselves. /sarcasm

April - posted on 03/11/2010

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i think it's stupid what the school did. what if you wanted to go to prom with your best friend who happens to be the same sex because neither of you have boyfriends? would that have been allowed if they were straight?

Kate CP - posted on 03/11/2010

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I would be furious with the school board. What a crock. Some of the "gowns" I've seen kids wear to prom are little more than scraps of fabric covering naughty bits. And LOTS of girls go to prom with a close female friend who AREN'T gay (my sister was one of them!). All this girl wanted was to go to prom and have fun and these old fashioned farts just can't let go of "traditional values". Blah. :P

Carolee - posted on 03/11/2010

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I was prohibited from going to a prom with my then-boyfriend because I went to a different school. We had written permission from both principals at our respective schools, then a week before the dance (after my dress and our tickets were bought and his suit was rented), they SUDDENLY decided to ban us becuase they thought it would be a disruption. As a result, we got dressed up and went to Taco Bell with our parents.



Yes, it sucks to be banned for a dance because of who you are dating... but I could not imagine if they had tried to cancel the ENTIRE dance just because I wanted to go! I think the big difference is that my then-boyfriend and I both went to really large schools... I think we were one of about 6 couples who were forbidden to go, but the others were for discipline and they had more than a week's notice.



I don't think it's right that she would have been excluded because of who she wanted to take, but I also don't think they should have cancelled the entire dance. If they wanted to take a course of action, they should have just told her that she could come with her "friend" as a friend and that they both needed to wear something at least slightly feminine. (I also have issues with the "hooker dresses" they have that pass for prom dresses nowadays, but that's a WHOLE other conversation.)

[deleted account]

I think it's ridiculous to have canceled their prom over a girl wanting to have a same sex date! They obviously knew that they could not deny her the right to not be discriminated and they didn't want to deal with the backlash of a bunch of hardcore conservatives. So they eliminated the "problem" by denying everyone of a prom. Gee I wonder how pissed off and resentful the other students were towards her when she went to school the next day? I can only imagine what the rest of the school year was like for her!
The school obviously has made it clear that if any same sex couples want to partake in prom that they will just cancel it all together just to make a point that it's not acceptable to be gay in their community. And what's really sad is that they probably will organize their own "private" prom where she will be excluded from which is probably their goal from the get go. It's just another round about way to deny citizens equal rights without actually violating any laws.
With that being said I'm sure glad I live in Canada! Not even in Catholic schools can they deny the right for same sex couples to attend their prom. A student went to court over it in the early 2000's and the Superior court of Justice in Ontario ruled that denying a student the right to a same sex date at his prom (even if it was a Catholic school) violated the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms. Yeah Canada!

Jenny - posted on 03/11/2010

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Alison, why do you think it was right for the school to deny this girl to attend her prom with her partner?

[deleted account]

I think the school was right for not allowing her to attend with her girlfriend, but they went too far by cancelling the prom for everyone. I would tell my son to be kind and respectful to the girl and not to even mention the prom. I would also tell him not to condone any bullying of this girl and to report it.

Jessica - posted on 03/11/2010

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Brandi said it nice and sweet, I agree. I think I would have made a custom dress that looked like a tux, played by there rules and still broke them all right in front of there faces where they couldn't say anything without showing there open discrimination.

Brandi - posted on 03/11/2010

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My opinion:

I think it is really sad that America is still so full of so many backward people. I'm sure there was a time when blacks & whites couldn't go to the same prom/etc as well. We evolved. We eventually will here too and someone else's religion won't dictate everyone else's lives.

Ashley - posted on 03/11/2010

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Chantel, at my high school (also public) there was a group of kids who had a prayer circle every morning at school. It didn't hurt anyone, so no one cared.

Ashley - posted on 03/11/2010

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Wow, it's silly that the requirement for your date is for them to be of the opposite sex... I remember a lot of girls who didn't have a date, so their date was their best girlfriend. We did have limits on dress, but that was for how revealing a dress was.
Now at my senior prom, a sophomore (who was gay) tried to go to my prom dressed in drag, with fake breasts and everything. He wasn't allowed to go because there were already threats to his person, and let's face it, it was prom. No need for a flashy dress, wig, fake breasts, etc. We know you are gay! Officially it was because he was not a senior.
But this school seems a little backwards. Maybe ask the girl if she could wear a dress instead of a tux?
Oh well, with the publicity, I have a feeling their policy will change. I guess I'm glad I live in WA, we are pretty open-minded and accepting here! :)

Jenny - posted on 03/11/2010

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Exactly, it's ok for the straight couples to dry hump on the dance floor but two girls is too much for them to handle. At least they won't pregnant! The district is acting juvenile by shutting the whole thing down.

Chantel - posted on 03/11/2010

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As to the article, I don't see why it has to be such a big deal for a couple of girls to go to prom together and wear a tuxedo. Why does it matter to anyone else. Because looking at them offends someone?? Don't look then. Some straight couples offend me with the excessive PDA and such but no one ever stopped them from doing school functions...

Chantel - posted on 03/11/2010

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QUOTE: Jenny, actually in many schools it's not a "have at'er" kind of situation. It has to be exactly what you said...quiet moment....they have to hide it. A group of kids in a public school can't stand together in the hallway and pray outloud - even if they are keeping to their little circle whiel they do it.

I know this wasn't directed at me but I would like to say that actually they can stand together and pray out loud. There was a Christian group of kids in my high school who did every day. As long as it wasn't disrupting classes no one had a problem with it. And it was a public high school.

Jenny - posted on 03/11/2010

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Oh I was under the assumption praying was a private conversation one had with their god. Group praying is not allowed at our school either and I'm totally ok with that.

[deleted account]

I think these are two separate issues. It depends on where you live when it comes to praying. I grew up in Ohio (U.S.) and we had a group that met every Wednesday before school (but on campus) that prayed and discussed the bible. We could pray as a group if everyone in the group wanted to. If you didn't want to then you didn't have to.

Maybe we need a new thread about the separation of church and state because that's not the issue in the article.

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