How young is too young for the sex talk?

April - posted on 07/30/2010 ( 15 moms have responded )

3,420

16

263

My cousin is 9 years old. He was watching the show "How it's Made". The episode was on fish farming. They were talking about sperm....I guess fish sperm. Well, he asked his mother what sperm is, but she didn't give him the sex talk. She just said that the male fish use fertilizer to make the female fish eggs grow. Should she have provided him with more information...should he have received "The talk?"

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

[deleted account]

I plan on telling the truth up to my child's understanding level. Kids are going to find out anyways, I'd rather it A) come from me and B) be correct.

[deleted account]

'The talk'? It isn't (or shouldn't be) all just one big talk. Was that her exact wording? I think I probably would have said that sperm is what the male fish use to help grow the babies... or something like that. I 'think' she probably did ok as long as she answered all his questions truthfully. If they want more info... they will ask.

What I have a problem w/ is parents avoiding or ignoring the questions... or flat out lying to avoid 'embarrassing' topics. I have been guilty of the first one myself though... when my girls were 5 and wanted to know how my stepsister had my niece when she wasn't married. They understand a lot more about that now though. I just wasn't prepared to answer their questions in the bathroom at their school. ;)

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

15 Comments

View replies by

Sherri - posted on 08/25/2010

9,593

15

387

It is up to his mom. I didn't have the sex talk until my kids were 12. I had the body changing talk at 9 but no sex talk until 12.



My kids had no clue what actually sex was when we had the talk at 12 either. They aren't into girls yet my oldest is 13 and he would rather hang out with his buddies.

[deleted account]

@Sarah, Ewww, who refers to a vagina as a 'cookie'?! That must really confuse the poor kids when they're offered a cookie at a friends house!

Jenny - posted on 08/25/2010

4,426

16

126

There is no too young, it's an ongoing discussion. My 7 year old knows all about it. I don't want her being misinformed in the schoolyard so I know she has the tools to know if someone's trying to pull the wool over her eyes.

Val - posted on 08/25/2010

21

35

0

my daughter was9yrs old when we started talking about how her body is starting to change and her periods and when she starts having boyfriends,it was really nice there was no embarresment while talking about it and she is 15yrs old now and she knows she can ask me anything and i will tell her honestly

Sarah - posted on 08/25/2010

555

25

44

We use correct terminology even though Zoe is only 11 months- she has a vagina, not a who-who or a cookie or a silly-what's-it. LOL My in-laws think I'm wierd and insist on referring to "it" in cutesy terms, but that's just how I was raised. I will definatly talk about sex as it arises and as I think it is needed, but to me there is no such thing as too soon. Even little kids should know what their parts are callled and that they are for them and no one else!

[deleted account]

Ive always answered questions as they came up with all my sons, only this week i explained to my three year old how babies come out because he thought his baby brother was coming out of my belly button lol. My 11 year old just had the sex ed talk in school and came home moaning because i forgot to tell him he'd get spots lol obviously i was concentrating on talking to him about safe sex, stds and pubic hair and damn i forgot the all important acne lmao

Tara - posted on 08/24/2010

12

28

0

oh man, my son is 2 (next month) and our roommates daughter will be 2 in december, well this is the first time my son has seen a little girls parts and is already curious and checking himself out and doesnt understand why his sticks out and hers doesnt, i will be very open with my son (and daughter) when the time is right, and i will do the little bit at a time and not the one huge talk. my cousin is 9 years old and was 7 1/2 when i had my son, well i was talking to my cousin and she had asked me something and i said "well i still havnt started my period since i had him" my little cousin goes "whats a period?" and me, not being her mother, felt it wasnt my place to tell her, well just a few months ago, she found tampons in the bathroom and came out and asked what those were for & when i said "for ur period" she again asked "whats a period?" and when i addressed this issue to her mother, she simply said "shes too young to know about that stuff" which i know is wrong cuz one of my friends little sisters started her period at 9 years old! so i think when children start to ask questions is when u should start talking to them about it, and remember, the more open u are about it, the better ur relationship will be with ur children & the more honest they will be able to be with u!

Mae - posted on 07/31/2010

191

19

17

I don't know if there is a too young..... Well I take that back before they are able to understand what you are saying is probably too young and you'll be wasting your breath. My mom read a medical dictionary to me and my brother when I was about 4 I think because he wanted to know why I didn't have a "pee-pee" I think that you should start addressing the different topics as questions arise.

[deleted account]

I got so frustrated that I didn't know what sex was that when I was 11 I looked it up in the encyclopedia. I do not want my daughter to do that. I will be telling her. Not right now. She's two and knowing that a baby is in Mama's belly is enough to satisfy her. But when she's old enough to ask questions, I'll answer them.

Minnie - posted on 07/31/2010

7,076

9

786

April that's hilarious! And kind of nice that your parents were comfortable enough to be so frank with you.

April - posted on 07/31/2010

3,420

16

263

my 2 cents is that he is kinda old not to know what sex is. like lisa, i was 5 years old when my mother taught me about human reproduction. I asked her where my sister came from and she told me. and one time when i was 7 years old, i wanted to sleep with my parents after a nightmare. My mom wouldn't let me in the room...she opened the door ajar and said "Go away!! We're having sex!!!!"

[deleted account]

I agree that it shouldn't be thrown at them all at once. Talk about it when things come up, like the fish sperm. That's a good teachable moment. I don't think there's a "too young." I think you can adjusts things or explain them in a way a child will understand at their age. I plan on being open with my daughter. When she asks, I will answer.

Minnie - posted on 07/30/2010

7,076

9

786

Hum... I learned all about the biology of human reproduction at four years old. My mother was very matter-of-fact about it, and bought me a book.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms