[deleted account] ( 13 moms have responded )
I'm torn and unsure how to handle this situation. Feel free to turn this into a debate, since that's what this community is for. But really I'd like to know how you handle what your kids eat when they are not in your care.
First off, we eat healthy at my house. I'm not militant about it. My daughter gets excited to see McD's and knows what Coke is and ice cream is a favorite treat. But overall, we eat very healthy. I don't buy junk to keep in the house (except ice cream), and I cook mostly from scratch, and am careful to include plenty of grains, protein, fruits and veggies in our diets.
I also want to say that I've never made a big deal about what she eats when other people are watching her. Part of being a grandparent or aunt is getting spoil the kid, right? My thought has always been, "She eats well at our house, I won't stress about what she eats when we are out, or when she's with other people."
It has become an issue lately though. Some relatives act as if we are depriving our daughter. This statement was made in response to me saying we don't have cheerios in the house, "When you have a kid, you've got to feed her." I'm really not exaggerating.
So last time my daughter spend a few days with her grandmother, she came home with diarrhea. I know she had more sugar than her body is used to. I didn't say anything. Last night my husband and I went on "one last date before the baby". My daughter stayed with her great-grandparents. She LOVES it over there, and they adore her. They also have the worst eating habits of anyone I know, and I've always considered it a treat for my daughter to go over there and get spoiled for a few hours. This morning she woke up covered...literally covered...in throw up and diarrhea.
I've had to stop myself from calling my husband's grandmother to ask exactly what my daughter ate. I don't want to be too controlling. But at the same time, the way she eats in the care of her grandmother and great-grandmother is affecting her. My husband has been a little quiet about it this morning, but I know he's thinking about it.
How far is too far? Should I pack food for her when she goes to someone else's house? How can I address the issue diplomatically? I'm not mad at these people. I really do love them, and I know they love my daughter. But how can I get them to see that treats are okay...in MODERATION.