Should mums be happy with their changed bodies?

Victoria - posted on 02/15/2011

I would have to say I don't mind being pregnant. The last few weeks were hard with my first (we had purchased, cleaned, painted, re-floored, and got our things from the moving company in the last 3 weeks). But it was the spreading of my hips that bothered me.
I'm glad that many OB/GYN offices are telling mothers how much to expect to gain and what "normal" changes are.
I really didn't mind how my body had changed after my daughter was born. It took me almost a year to get back down to a size I was most comfortable with. However, I think we postpartum Mommies need to remember that we should dress our new bodies and not pine for what once was.
Besides now I have another little girlie on the way, so I'm just trying to keep fit because I feel better.

Amy - posted on 02/14/2011

I felt huge, like a wale, while I was prego but I never once thought I looked "fat". Maybe it's how I carried both babies (out front) but I love the look of the prego belly, it just looks so natural and amazing. Watching the belly move as the baby moves is a beautiful thing.

After I had my son I felt horible, I gained a lot of weight during the pregnancy and felt hopeless that when I got pregnant again that it would just get worse, but why bother trying to loose the weight it your going to put it right back on? Well the second time I watche what i ate and controlled my cravings, with in 2 weeks I lost all that pregnancy weight, and by 4 weeks I lose even more. at 4 months I'm about 7 lb away from where I weighed when I first got pregnant. I'm still not the happies about it all, but I'm motivated to get my body back. I have seen many mom's do it and I know I will be another one of those who will look amazing again (in the next year). My boobs have adjusted as I gained and loost weight, they never really looked bad.

It's better to try and get your body back when your young, and right after having the baby. Waiting a year later makes it that much harder.

Alison - posted on 02/14/2011

Everyone "should" learn to love their bodies, but it is unfair to tell a woman what she should and should not feel.

Ashley=) - posted on 02/13/2011

During my pregnancies i was amazed with how my body changed while my daughters grew in side of me.Not to forget the growing tummy which i loved so much.

The stretch marks, extra weight gain and larger breasts was all part of the process.



After the births i feel allow time to be a mother and when its time exercise again and eat healthy, WHY be unhappy now..yes we love our children and the changes, we had no choice there apart of the process.



Eating well and exercise is important whether or not we have children.Take care of your body's and once you do that okay you might ever be post baby shape but you will feel better about yourself.I am now 7stone and healthy after two children and my youngest is 2.I have c-section scar, stretch marks, wider hips and larger breasts but I'm fit and healthy and most importantly HAPPY.

For many who get surgery to lift there breasts etc i have no problem with that.It does not say we dont love our children or the whole experience of there journey to get here& how they changed the appearance of our bodies.



It is okay to feel unhappy but what i say to many moms is do something about it.Sitting home snacking, eating unhealthy and doing no exercise would make me and many unhappy.

Erin - posted on 02/13/2011

I loved my pregnant body. I had a ginormo belly but escaped with only a few very faint stretch marks that showed themselves at the very end. I was totally comfortable in my skin, and was actually wearing a bikini in my neighbour's pool when I went into labour :)

I have accepted the fact that my body won't ever be the same again. I didn't drop the baby weight (a whopping 34kg) until my daughter was around 18 months old (even after an initial loss of 11kg in the firts week), but I'm ok with that. Different bodies respond differently to pregnancy and post-natal hormones. Some women snap back immediately and look like they've never had a child (I secretly hate them lol). But that is certainly not me. Of course I would rather have my flat stomach back, but I don't spend time dwelling on it.

Charlie - posted on 02/12/2011

I for the most part LOVED my pregnant body , I felt so feminine and beautiful and only today I was thinking how even though before I had kids I had a killer body I feel I love my body now more than I did then , even with stretch marks that look like my tummy went through a meat grinder and a little extra weight !

Krista - posted on 02/12/2011

I loved my pregnant body. I've always had a protruding belly anyway, so pregnancy was the first time in my entire life that I wasn't trying to suck it in and/or camouflage it. It was SUCH a nice break to not hate my belly, and to be able to just let my belly lead the way and be out there, all big and proud.

As far as post-pregnancy, my body hasn't changed a ton. It didn't change my boobs any, and I already had enough stretch marks and spider veins to make me look like I was manufactured by Rand McNally. My belly's a little saggier. Oh well. I'm 36 and pushed a kid out of me -- I'm not going to look like I did when I was 18.

Amy - posted on 02/12/2011

I love my pregnant body. I finally have BOOBS! :) I could honestly care less about what my body looks like. I'm healthy, my husband still thinks I'm hot enough to want to have sex with me, and...I don't know, what I look like isn't who I am. You can be unhappy if you want, but what good does it do you?

Teresa - posted on 02/12/2011

Pregnancy was hell on me (duh, 4'11" 88pound woman carrying TWINS) the first time. Not quite as torturous the second time, but still rough.

I certainly didn't like being unable to walk up/down stairs alone since my ankles were as big around as my thighs normally are.... I spent 12 weeks not being allowed to go anywhere and then a week being 'allowed' but not able.

Doesn't matter how thin I am, my belly will always be flabby and annoying. All that being said.... I don't really care. ;)

Katie - posted on 02/12/2011

I think it is totally natural to be sad about the loss of your pre-pregnancy body. I never appreciated my flat(ish) stomach before I got pregnant with my first, or my perky boobs, or the fact that my butt didn't sag. But I got over it when I was pregnant the first time. By the time I had Otto I loved my gigantic boobs and my big tummy...But I had nine months to gradually get used to it. Then the kid pops out and 14 hours later my body looked like a trainwreck! I worked and worked and breastfed like mad, and 11 months later I was more or less pleased with my body, granted there were a few nooks and crannies and vericose veins and scars that weren't there before but I was getting used to it. Then I got pregnant again, now 16 weeks later all bets are off. All of the space that Otto made in his nine months of residence seems to have been filled right off the bat by this new kid. I am still nursing and my milk has stopped coming in on one side so I am the lopsided boob monster. And if I have to hear one more person tell me that I earned every mark and I should love my body because it gave me my son and is in the process of giving me another child I am going to cry! My son is my world! I love him to the point that it actually blows my mind, but I don't have to love my body all the time. I am allowed to be less then pleased about the loss of my youthful silhouette.

Danielle - posted on 02/12/2011

Personally I love being pregnant, but I HATE my strechmarks. It has nothing to do with wanting to look like a model-I've never cared to look like them and I've got scars to prove it (working on a ranch does give you those lol)-I just want to be able to wear a 2 piece to the lake w/out people staring-and I mean STARING-at them. I know that they are "battle scars" just like the ranch-made-ones, and I know that my husband thinks I'm beautiful-but I still don't like them. Oh, and my mom didn't have them :-(
"Should" women be happy with their bodies? I don't think the word 'should' is the appropriate term.,..it's all about self confidence...we 'shouldn't' have to feel happy with our bodies any more than we 'should' be embarrased by them.

Toni - posted on 02/12/2011

Mary if your odd then so am I, I love my body when pregnant, I love seeing my belly growing and I love my fuller bigger breasts (although first time round they got in the way I went from a DD to an F cup from the time I found out I was pregnant (5 weeks) to 8 weeks, then they stayed stationary). I didn't even mind the stretch marks because I knew I would get them (I have stretch marks on the back of my knees from when I was younger) and they weren't as bad as I expected them to be so that was a bonus. However, with my first pregnancy my skin was crystal clear and my hair thick and glossy this time my skin has broke out and my hair is lank and blegh - this time I don't feel as though I am glowing at all (maybe due to the fact my morning sickness was worse this time and I have been in pain from my SPD from 10 weeks in - the joys).

After I had Ethan my breasts definately felt less full but they kept the pregnancy size of F cup so I think I just noticed the difference in having milk in and not having milk. I lost all my pregnancy weight within the first three weeks and actually weighed less than I did pre-pregnancy so I was happy with that. I think though I am an optimist so although I do have days where I feel cack and minging most of the time I focus on my positives rather than putting myself down for my perceived faults.

I wouldn't read to much into 'should', Lisa, I was wondering what others felt about how they feel about their body image and the changes that occured during pregnancy and after, I don't think people should feel one way or the other or that anyones feelings are any more improtant.

Kate CP - posted on 02/11/2011

I have to add that being pregnant is not always a wonderful thing. With my first pregnancy I was sick the ENTIRE time and lost 25 pounds by the time I delivered my daughter. That was NOT wonderful. With my son (my second AND LAST pregnancy) I had HORRIBLE hip and joint pain, sciatica, and I was in labor for 6 damn days with that kid. Again, NOT wonderful. I love my children and I would go through it all again to have them if I had to...but you can bet your butt I didn't enjoy a single moment of that pain and anguish and I didn't think being pregnant was wonderful. I think my children are wonderful. If I could have kids without being pregnant I would. :P

Kate CP - posted on 02/11/2011

I'm supposed to be happy that my tits look like tennis balls in tube socks and my ass and thighs look like I've been beaten by a sack full of quarters? No. I don't think so.

Am I happy I had my children? ECSTATIC! Would it be nice if I could have had my kids without trashing my body? Yep. Will I live with the aftermath? Yep. Would I do it all again? HELL yes. But that doesn't mean I have to look in the mirror at my gut and stretch marks and go "Yea...that's attractive".

Lacye - posted on 02/11/2011

I hated being pregnant but I have to say I loved my pregnant body. I liked having the big round belly and my boobs just looked awesome during that time! LOL! I didn't really get bad stretch marks but I did get some and I've come to look at them like they are battle scars. lol.

Minnie - posted on 02/11/2011

I don't like the word 'should.'

It implies that one is expected to feel a particular emotion and that any other isn't acceptable. It invalidates one's feelings.

It's nice to be accepting of what our bodies look like but let's get real. Many women are sensitive about the way they look and want to conform to a particular image. If they feel unhappy, they should be allowed that feeling. Perhaps they can work through it in one manner or another to be eventually happy, but a feeling is a feeling.

Michelle - posted on 02/11/2011

I loved being pregnant, I loved everything about being pregnant...even my changing body. My body was changing because I was bringing a baby into the world. Once my children were born, I was ok with my body. Am I the size I was before I had children...NO...but every stretch mark I have, I wear with pride because I have 3 beautiful children who created those stretch marks, and I love my rounder tummy again because it reminds me I am a mom, and I love being a mom.

*Fluffy Bunnies - posted on 02/11/2011

I didn't get stretch marks the first time around. We'll see what happens this time, but I have high hopes because my mom never got them while pregnant. Overall, I like being pregnant. I think I look a bit odd with a huge tummy, but overall I like my pregnant body. I definitely have days where I feel fat or blah though. I lost my pregnancy weight plus way more in the first few months and that bothered me more because all I heard from my mom and grandma was how I looked sick. To answer the question, it varies from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy. I'm trying not to expect this pregnancy to be the same as the last.

Johnny - posted on 02/11/2011

I'm not thrilled with my gut at all. I don't have to like it, there's no requirement to be happy with saggy. No amount of work tones it. Very irritating. It makes it hard to buy pants or wear slim fitting skirts. I'm happy that I am healthy and that my body produced my daughter, thrilled with all that actually, but the gut I could really do without. I seriously can't imagine that even without the modern marketing madness that I would like it at all. I don't wish to look like a supermodel at all, I want to look like ME, sans gut.

Alyssa - posted on 02/11/2011

No, they shouldn't have to "be happy" with their changed bodies!

My body is my own. Yes, I shared it for a while when preg and BF. But my body belongs to me not my children, they are who I live for but they are not my life...I AM ME!

I am happy with my body but if I wasn't I would do something about it....because we can, and why not.

Mary - posted on 02/11/2011

Maybe I'm odd, but I loved my body while pregnant. My boobs got huge almost overnight at around 12 weeks (Id been a B cup my whole life), and I loved my belly. Now, I will say that I felt like crap a lot of the time - but throwing up 3 or 4 times a day for months on end is not fun.

My skin was the clearest it's ever been, and my hair was great as well. I only gained 25lbs, and had not one stretch mark or varicose vein, so that plays a big role in why I didn't hate my body when pregnant.

I will say I was less than enamored with it for a few months after. I was back to my pre-pregnant weight by 6 weeks, but that jiggly tummy...ugh! My boobs held up okay, even after nursing for over a year. They are back to being a B, and are only slightly saggy, but nothing really horrible.

I wonder, though, if my age has anything to do with it? I was 38 when I delivered, so I was a little less concerned with my appearance than I was in my 20's. Actually, I'm probably in better shape now than I was then, minus that still slightly squishy tummy.

Deanna - posted on 02/11/2011

I think it is perfectly normal and even expected to mourn the lose of our old bodies. However, I also believe that after, at most, a day or two you need to get over it and see what beautiful changes your child has given to your body. Your child helped your body to change and become a wonderful place for him/her to grow. The visual effects your body now shows will always be a reminder of the wonderful little life that you brought into this world.

Sherri - posted on 02/11/2011

HATED my pregnant body!!! Never had one picture of any of my 3 pregnancies. Then hated my after pregnant body even more!!!!

Lesa - posted on 02/11/2011

I think the media has made us too narcissistic. Now a days we have all this surgery available to us, or those who can afford it which is fine but, I feel mothers are taking big risks. It is surgery and you can die leaving your children motherless. My husband loves me no matter what I look like and I can easily turn off the lights when intimate. I don't want to risk my life to compete with models and I don't think it necessary. I think the majority of people who get surgery need to learn whats more important in life than how they look. Its not being happy with the change its accepting the fact that we are human and not perfect. Eventually we will be wrinkled and old, or the lucky ones who make it that far, and we will be left with whats on the inside to share with others and it wont be our dashing good looks making the impressions. The search for perfection in appearance is a waste of time.

Toni - posted on 02/11/2011

I?

What does that mean Clara?

User - posted on 02/11/2011

I was unhappy I got major stretchmarks,the reason isn't because I was pregnant either. It all comes with the territory.



I think many women have a vision of the perfect body while pregnant. Plump boobs,smooth skin with no marks,but that certainly is not the case.



Being pregnant is a wonderful thing and we as women need to accept any issues we get while pregnant,even stretchmarks.



Every woman is beautiful.



I've came to love my stretchmarks!



And just because your unhappy with stretchmarks while pregnant in no way means your unhappy with being pregnant.