The birds and the bees.....

Leah - posted on 11/27/2010 ( 22 moms have responded )

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"Mommy,where do babies come from?" Is a question asked by many children.



So to all you mothers,how did you explain the birds and the bees to your children(considering they were old enough to understand)? At what age did you talk to them? Did you give them bits and pieces or tell them everything at once?

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Jaime - posted on 11/28/2010

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lol Barb! I also have a boy, and I've already been warned to make sure I buy light-coloured sheets when he hits puberty and don't touch suspicious substances. I can't imagine what it will be like to have this talk with my son because I'm his only parent and I'm a bit worried that he won't have a male influence to refer back to or to rely on.

[deleted account]

I do add in the part about babies coming from God, but there is NO WAY I would only give that amount of information past the age of 5 at the latest and I certainly would never say it's a mystery to adults... That is lying to your kids. :(

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Jackie - posted on 12/01/2010

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OMFG BARB!!! That is absolutely hilarious!!!



Boy, I wonder what your son would say if he knew you just blasted him on CoM?! LMFAO. Oh man, I'm glad I don't have a boy

Sherri - posted on 12/01/2010

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I gave them age appropriate information for there questions until the age of 12 when we have the full blown sex talk.

Nikkole - posted on 11/30/2010

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id say around 8 or so i would have THE TALK with my kids becasue soo many kids are having sex younger and younger these days and i dont want my son or daughter being 12-13 and saying well mom never talked to me about sex so why not i should go ahead and try it!

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My son is only 13 months so we are nowehere near the talk yet, but when he does ask I intend to be completely honest and frank and tell him age appropriate facts.

Barb I am not looking forward to that, I'm taking Jodi's mental note - light coloured sheets and do NOT touch anything suspicious...

Jodi - posted on 11/28/2010

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**mental note to self - go out and purchase some light coloured sheets for the boys' beds**

LaCi - posted on 11/28/2010

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Well, mines only 2.5 and he isn't at all interested. Considering all the crap I'm watching he probably won't have an issue picking it up. When he asks me, I'll give him all the gory details. It's life, it's natural, and he should know it. No reason to sugarcoat it.

Ashley - posted on 11/28/2010

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lol barb im laughing so hard im crying o god what have i gotten my self into. ok light sheets touch nothing and hide the cameras lol

Barb - posted on 11/28/2010

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Oh it's been grand! You ladies will love it!

I guess the thing is even though i planned to have open and free flowing communication about sex, the conversations always caught me off guard. I always knew the topic would come up on the illusive "someday" just didn't know it would be "today" let alone what the conversation starter would be. LOL.

Jaime, that's a great idea about the sheets. I had two boys, two husbands, 3 brothers, a father, uncles, grandpas and work in a male dominated field, no one warned me about the sheets. I should have been warned about the sheets dammit!!

Krista - posted on 11/28/2010

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OMG Barb, I'm absolutely howling! Poor you. Of course, I have a boy as well, so it's good to know that THIS is what I have to look forward to!

Barb - posted on 11/28/2010

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OMG Krista!! There wasn't a "scary" button for me press on your post. wow.

My son came up to me after he had been playing with other children and i had been doing 50 things around the house and preparing to do 50 more things.
My mind was 1,000 miles away and i was slammed back to earth with "mommy, was i covered in cottage cheese when i was born?"

That was a nice conversation in which i felt i was nice and open with him, however around age 13 i went and got an old cheapo disposable camera developed and found pictures of his penis. (i recognized the underwear and jeans) I gave him the pictures and said i was glad to see he was developing well. At that point we had a really good conversation about how birth control was just as much a man's responsibility as it was a woman's If a man didn't want children than he should take precautions to not have children. And the importance of protecting his body. He did say "i am not really comfortable having this discussion with you, mom" i said "i bet you aren't, i wasn't real comfortable going through my photos and seeing your penis pop up either." Nice fish, nice fish, oh there's grandma, there's her dog, PENIS!

Flash forward to 17 years old. I was in his room with him and i noticed some water on the floor. I bent down to wipe it away saying "what is this water doing on your floor?" (because he has beautiful hardwood floors and he's not suppose to have food and drink up there) It wasn't water. It was a gel like substance that smelled salty and i knew what it was and i couldn't breathe. i couldn't even talk, my heart was pounding, his face was bright red as he was stammer for excuses as to what it was while he was trying drastically to wipe it off my fingers. I managed to get out. "clean it up please" I talked to my husband who of course howled laughing and said "that'll teach you to keep touching everything" and said to get tissues and a trash can and don't say anything.

My husband was right, i think twice before i touch anything now.

Jodi - posted on 11/28/2010

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LOL, Amanda, when my daughter found out that babies come out your vagina, she just sat there screwed up her nose and said "EWWWWW, GROSSSS". Then, when she thought about it, she asked about how a baby FITS out there. I just told her about what a very special and magical thing our vaginas are to be able to do that. Talk about unicorns and rainbows........

Amanda - posted on 11/27/2010

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Well my son became extremley interested in knowing where babies come from while I was in the hospital having his 2nd sister. He was asking if blood came out of my tummy and than the baby came afterwards. And my poor mom was watching him at the time, went to the library bought a book about the Birds and the Bees and they sat down and read it! He was almost 5 at the time. But he still has that book and he's almost 7 now. He rarley talks about it, but does know where babies come from and how. He calls it a grown up thing and thinks its disgusting. **AAHHHH---sigh of relief from me for now! Lol...So I guess I skated by that one, but I have 3 daughters and the oldest is 4, so I know it won't be much longer and I'll have to bust out the book! :)

Tabby - posted on 11/27/2010

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My daughter is only 10 months old right now but my husband and I have decided that as she gets older we'll answer her questions as they come. Honestly, I'm hoping we'll have another baby (we only want 2 kids) before she starts asking the really hard questions lol

Isobel - posted on 11/27/2010

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bahahahaha...I have shown my daughter a birth on television...she has politely requested that I NEVER do that again ;)

Jodi - posted on 11/27/2010

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I also answer questions as they come, at an age appropriate level. Obviously, when they are 2, they are looking for an answer at a very basic level, whereas the same question when they are 10 will require a detailed answer. But basically, we start at a very young age, by calling the body parts by the correct name and differentiating between boys and girls.

With my son, he already has had the full talk. I talked to him fully when he was 11.

Like Lisa, my 5 1/2 year old hasn't asked yet how babies get into our uterus, but she knows that's where they are and how they get out. She knows it takes a mummy and a daddy to put it there (figured that out on her own), but not how.

To me it is really important to answer kids' questions honestly at their level. If we, as parents, are embarrassed about talking to them about these things, it will have an impact on how they approach it, and on whether they feel comfortable with the topic themselves. My 13 year old feels perfectly comfortable asking me anything about sex, puberty, etc. And I think that is the best way to be, as open as possible to your children's questions.

Krista - posted on 11/27/2010

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I would give them bits and pieces, answering their questions as they come up, interspersed with extra information that they didn't ask, just to make sure that there are no gaps in their knowledge. I'm a big advocate of giving kids accurate information about how their bodies work.

I saw a thread about this topic over in a religious group on COM, and one of the mothers answered that she tells her kids that babies come from God and "that it's a mystery to adults as well how He forms people in a mommy's tummy)."

/headdesk.

[deleted account]

Bits and pieces starting from learning body parts in infancy/toddlerhood. My girls kind of got a backwards education. They, unfortunately, learned (at 5) about miscarriage before learning many facts about pregnancy, but that was unavoidable... They learned quite a bit about pregnancy while their 'auntie' was pregnant and then when I was pregnant w/ their brother. We got the American Girl book The Care and Keeping Of You when they were 7 and read it together. They still never asked about how babies get IN there, so I bought them 2 other books about that and we've gone over them as much as they've wanted. I do have another book.... Almost 12 that is even more detailed and adds more on the emotional aspects instead of just the physical stuff.... I'll probably be giving that to them in another year/year and a half. We are very open w/ anything they ever want/need to discuss.

Minnie - posted on 11/27/2010

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I answer the questions as they come. So far my four year old hasn't wondered about HOW babies get inside the uterus, but she knows what happens in there and how they get out. We watch lots of homebirth videos on youtube.

My mother gave me a book about reproduction when I was three that explained everything.

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My little one is only 2.5 so we're playing it by ear at this point. She knows there's a baby in Mommy's belly, but hasn't thought to ask how it got there. So we're leaving it at that for now. She knows Mama has boobs, and Daddy pees differently than she does. That's plenty for a 2.5 year old. I plan to give her honest open answers as she asks. If she doesn't ask, I'll tell her everything before she reaches middle school (around age 11). I was so curious but too embarrassed to ask, so I looked up "sex" in the encyclopedia when I was 12. Let's just say, that is NOT the way I want my daughter to start figuring things out.

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