Toddlers in Tiarras

Shelby - posted on 02/19/2010

I have experience (kinda) from both sides here. As a little girl, for years, I participated in pageants. My mom and dad drove me up and down the East Coast as far and as often as I wanted to go, I sang, and pranced around, I did swimsuit competitions, and sang in my swimsuit from as far back as I can remember, However...I never did the "Glitz" pageants, I always did the natural ones. I never ever felt pressured to do anything that I didn't want to do. I was lucky there. I know my parents only did what they did to make me happy. On the other hand, I also remember what it felt like to lose. How miserable that feeling was to be "not pretty" enough, because lets face it, thats all it is. There is nothing else to it. Nothing. Its all on how pretty you are. To this day, my mom blames my self esteem on those pageants. She says that I feel the way I feel about myself at times because after 5 kids I can't be the model of "perfect" that society expects because I have been trained to be that way, I think she may be on to something.
Now, I have one girl. At 9 months I entered her into a little pageant back home. She did wonderful. She was made for them truly. She was the only little thing on the stage walking. She won the pageant and won Miss. Photogenic. My husband however put a stop to it real quick. He said he had never felt so horrible in his life. He said every baby on that stage was absolutely gorgeous and he felt sickened seeing them judged like that. He said he felt like he was showing his daughter as if she were livestock. I never looked at it like that...So we won't be doing it again.

Amy - posted on 02/19/2010

for a one time little thing like a fair or mardi gras, i don't think it's a big deal. it could be just a fun dress up time for you and daughter to bond. as long as it's not being done for silly superficial reasons.

~~~however for the parents/kids that do it full time ------children aren't trophies. they aren't toys. it seems to me that parents do this for their own benefits and gains rather than the child's. what's most beautiful about a child is who they truly are - not what someone molds them and stuffs them into. -or sprays them into. now, my daughter is 3 and we play makeup and paint nails some days and before church she asks for a lil spritz of spray in her hair because she sees me do it. she discovered my little wreath -like a tiara - in my jewelry box that i wore on my wedding day and asked to wear it. fine. so, i have a kid in a tiara - but her kindom is the living room and it's just for playtime. if a young lady is old enough and ASKS to be in one-or more than one - she needs to understand how expensive they are. you could buy a house for your child with what some of these women spend on "pretty-ing up" their kids.

Jenny - posted on 02/19/2010

60-70 thousand on a beauty pagaent for kids! That is disgusting. That would be enough to support two small families for a year.

Sharon - posted on 02/19/2010

Toddlers in tiaras = wrong.

?? - posted on 02/18/2010

I can't believe that one woman actually said "if she actually makes it somewhere with this... my 60 - 70 thousand dollars... it's just a drop in the bucket"

Who the hell has 60 - 70 thousand dollars to throw away on a freakin 4 YEAR OLD in a beauty pageant. PEOPLE ARE DYING ALL OVER THE WORLD and this broad is dishing out $10k on a freakin DOLL that looks like her daughter !!!!!

When your daughter, looks like a porcelain doll, it's not cute anymore lady, it's freakin creepy!!!

Ashley - posted on 02/18/2010

I would NEVER put my kids in a pageant (you can put boys in too), but I find myself drawn to watching it... I agree Meghan, it makes me feel like an awesome mom! There was one episode of Toddlers in Tiaras where two sisters entered. Aparently one of the girls tended to win more, and the mother even said it was because she was more beautiful...My mouth must have hit the floor and stayed there the entire show. It ended up as the "favored" child lost because she hated pageants, whilst the "plain" daughter won one of the top prizes. Sickening.

The flippers creep me out, there was one little girl who went without and was missing her two top teeth, and was so darn cute without the creepy teeth.

Kyle - posted on 02/17/2010

It's funny I ran across this thread, I am actually watching it for the first time now. I is just so horrible when some of the girls are OBVIOUSLY forced by there mothers to do this stuff. One little girl on there (Janeane Alcalar), couldn't be more than 5, obviously does NOT want to do the pageant. Her mother is so mean to her because she cries because she doesn't want to get her hair done, or she doesn't want to go on stage, or she just doesn't want to do it. It is so sad and her mother admitted that she is the competitive one and does not like her daughter to lose and when her daughter does loose it creates a bunch of drama. Her mom is always telling her to stop embarrassing her and she is disappointing her. It's pathetic. I feel so bad for the little girl.

Alison - posted on 02/09/2010

I saw the show and it was very creepy. Most of the girls were wearing the same clothes that men dress in to do drag acts. There was glitter dresses, too much make up, huge puffed up hair and spray tan. eeew

Good Day! - posted on 02/08/2010

I agree. =)

Kathy - posted on 02/08/2010

As long as it's not too serious. My girls played hockey and soccer, and enjoyed it. We praised them if they played fairly or scored a goal, but the outcome of the game was immaterial. The number of pushy parents round was embarassing, and maybe that's what's put me off competitions. I've seen too many kids made miserable from the fact that their team didn't win that I've always played down winning and concentrated on the fun of the game and playing fairly.

Good Day! - posted on 02/08/2010

Kathy, this is a little off topic but I'm curious. You said you don't go in for anything competitive for kids. What about sports? Kids soccer or baseball? I find nothing wrong with a little competetion. There are so many teachable moments that come out of it.

Kathy - posted on 02/07/2010

As Michelle said, we don't see much of these ghastly toddler beauty pageants, and thank God for that! I can't understand the reasoning behind it.

To tell the truth, I'm not a fan of cutest baby photo competitions etc because I think exposing your child to comparisons is somehow demeaning. I just don't go in for anything competitive for kids.

Lise - posted on 01/30/2010

OMG... One lady highlighted the hair of her 18 mo old baby. Seriously? What are they thinking?

Nikki - posted on 01/29/2010

all I can say is I AM SOOOO HAPPY I HAVE A BOY and even if the next one is a girl I would never subject her to that, but we live in Canada and pageants aren't something you see around here, which I am thankful for.

Meghan - posted on 01/29/2010

I watch it only because it makes me feel like and exceptional mommy lol...thoes moms are out of control...making their daughters do it because they probabbly never had the chance to...

Bek - posted on 01/29/2010

I think that some beauty pagents send the wrong message. People should be focus on natural beauty and true talent, not on fake apperances.

Michelle - posted on 01/05/2010

In Australia beauty pagents for children don't happen a whole lot. There are photographic contests for the cutest baby etc. My first husband flat refused to allow our daughter to be put into one of these shows. And I have no desire to put my 3 year old identical twin girls into them either. I believe that children should be who they are. Not with false hair and false teeth (my stars never heard of such a thing before today!) and spray tans and make up. Good grief they are little kids, not 18 year olds. Most of these poor little kids don't have a choice to be in these pagents. They get fed up, and want to run around and play. These parents make this their life every other spare minute. They are so wrong to treat their girls like little Barbie dolls and parade them around for all to see. Let children be children, cause you can't get your childhood back.

Cassie - posted on 01/03/2010

I think that show is ridiculous but somehow addicting. lol! ;P If I find myself watching it, I just can't stop. It's like watching a train wreck. It is amazing to see how these mothers are living vicariously through their daughters and are unable to see the damage it may cause.

My husband and I have discussed this though. We despise beauty pageants and would never enter our daughter into one unless.... she came home and truly wanted to be in one just for the fun of it. If she came to us begging to be in one, we would discuss it and what it would entail with her. We would talk about winning and losing and what goes into being in a pageant. If she still wanted to do it, my husband and I have decided that we would look into the pageant to see what it is and what it stands for. If it seemed pretty basic, we would consider.

After watching that show, I have learned a few things about pageants. Apparently, there are "glitz" pageants with all the make-up, fake hair, flippers, expensive dresses and then there are natural pageants where the child wears normal clothes, no make-up, and normal hair. If our daughter did come to us in a few years wanting to do a pageant, we would only allow a natural pageant.

I really hate them and hope she never comes to us wanting to do a pageant but I won't forbid her from them if it is what SHE really wants. This is just what my husband and I have discussed.

Krista - posted on 01/02/2010

Quoting Joy "the historian":

My toddlers talent...crapping his pants and then painting with his poo..do they hand out trophies for that..LOL!

I have seen people buy hair pieces for their babies for a pageant..because they did not have any hair on their head..Seriously a 4 month old with a hair piece full of blood curls stuck to her head...It was freaky looking not cute.

And to think people pay thousands of dollars on flippers....a set of false teeth to replace the spaces made by the teeth that have fallen out..personally I think it is adorable when little kids start loosing their teeth and have those gaps when they smile.

Krista...I am tempted to put a mullet wig and some fake redneck teeth on my daughter and sign her up.

That'd be awesome. And her talent could be spitting sunflower seeds for distance while changing the oil in an '82 GM truck. 

JL - posted on 01/02/2010

My toddlers talent...crapping his pants and then painting with his poo..do they hand out trophies for that..LOL!

I have seen people buy hair pieces for their babies for a pageant..because they did not have any hair on their head..Seriously a 4 month old with a hair piece full of blood curls stuck to her head...It was freaky looking not cute.

And to think people pay thousands of dollars on flippers....a set of false teeth to replace the spaces made by the teeth that have fallen out..personally I think it is adorable when little kids start loosing their teeth and have those gaps when they smile.

Krista...I am tempted to put a mullet wig and some fake redneck teeth on my daughter and sign her up.

Johnny - posted on 01/02/2010

The whole idea of it disturbs me. I've seen those pictures of 6 month old babies with make-up on and I instantly wonder what sort of evil person would do that to a child and think it is okay. I can not imagine dressing my daughter up so that people could judge her by her appearance. And putting make-up, fake teeth and hair extensions on her would make me cry. Then they put them up on a stage and have them prance around winking at the audience. Gross! My opinion is that these people have no moral center or common sense. As for "talent shows"... what kind of "talent" do toddlers have? Coloring inside the lines? Singing "Row Your Boat"? Stacking blocks? Seriously, the entire idea is daft and nasty.

Katherine - posted on 01/02/2010

My first thought is JonBenet Ramsey and that is enough.

Charlie - posted on 01/02/2010

I think its sick and quiet frankly sad on the mother behalf who is obviously trying to live out her own dream through her daughter/s.

Krista - posted on 01/02/2010

Quoting Iris :

No, I would never submit my daughters into a beauty pageant. All the reasons have already been listed above. They even make fake teeth for theses little girls! It's very disturbing to see them look like mini adults walking around the stage. And what kind of a message is it to the child, when their appearance is completely altered in order for them to look "beautiful" enough to participate?

I'm now picturing these tiny girls walking around with these big white fake chompers, and it's just damn surreal. 

Of course, I'm warped, and if I found out about a pageant doing this, I'd be tempted to bribe my kid to enter the pageant wearing a pair of fake Austin Powers teeth. 

Iris - posted on 01/01/2010

No, I would never submit my daughters into a beauty pageant. All the reasons have already been listed above. They even make fake teeth for theses little girls! It's very disturbing to see them look like mini adults walking around the stage. And what kind of a message is it to the child, when their appearance is completely altered in order for them to look "beautiful" enough to participate?

C. - posted on 01/01/2010

Quoting Krista:

Quoting Christina:

Oh Sara.. I know!!!! Every time I see a photograph of a young girl from a beauty pageant, it ALWAYS makes me think of JonBenet.. It's disgusting how people dress their little girls as full grown adults.. Heavy makeup, hair done perfectly.. The works.. It's sick.

And regardless of anything else -- it really says something disturbing about our society that we are rewarding little girls (toddlers, even!) for trying to look like 25-year old tarts. Girls are constantly being told to remain pure and virginal, and that being sexual will get them labeled as a "slut." And yet, they're being encouraged to put on makeup, and wear midriff-baring outfits, and flirt and wink.  Society is sending them such a screwed-up message: be sexy, but not sexual; be chaste, but don't be prim; flirt and be coy, but never, ever be assertive. 

Pardon my language, but stuff like this is what seriously fucks up a lot of girls' psyches. 

I couldn't agree with you more, Krista! I hate it when I'm speechless, b/c I love to have something to say (doesn't everybody?) Haha.. But you definitely covered all the bases, in my opinion.

Krista - posted on 01/01/2010

Quoting Christina:

Oh Sara.. I know!!!! Every time I see a photograph of a young girl from a beauty pageant, it ALWAYS makes me think of JonBenet.. It's disgusting how people dress their little girls as full grown adults.. Heavy makeup, hair done perfectly.. The works.. It's sick.

And regardless of anything else -- it really says something disturbing about our society that we are rewarding little girls (toddlers, even!) for trying to look like 25-year old tarts. Girls are constantly being told to remain pure and virginal, and that being sexual will get them labeled as a "slut." And yet, they're being encouraged to put on makeup, and wear midriff-baring outfits, and flirt and wink.  Society is sending them such a screwed-up message: be sexy, but not sexual; be chaste, but don't be prim; flirt and be coy, but never, ever be assertive. 

Pardon my language, but stuff like this is what seriously fucks up a lot of girls' psyches. 

C. - posted on 01/01/2010

Oh Sara.. I know!!!! Every time I see a photograph of a young girl from a beauty pageant, it ALWAYS makes me think of JonBenet.. It's disgusting how people dress their little girls as full grown adults.. Heavy makeup, hair done perfectly.. The works.. It's sick.

Sara - posted on 01/01/2010

I object to them because I think sexualizing a little girl is sick and wrong. All I can think of when I watch those shows is that poor little JonBenet Ramsey. She probably would not be dead if she wasn't in those pagents. Putting my toddler in mid-drift exposing outfits, putting makeup on her and teaching her to dance seductively are not on my agenda for how to raise a healthy young woman. I want my daughter to value herself for the beautiful workings of her mind and not her looks...of course I think she is beautiful, but she's also funny, smart and silly, which are much more important to me.

Teresa - posted on 01/01/2010

I'm not a supporter of 'beauty' pagents. I wouldn't have an objection to one of my children entering a talent contest type of thing if they were interested, but nothing w/ the focus on LOOKS. :)

C. - posted on 12/31/2009

Quoting heather:

I think there are harmless toddler beauty pageants, and then there are the hardcore pageants that have all the crazy mothers yelling at their little daughters to smile bigger, or they make their little girls practice their routine for hours, the poor kids dont enjoy that! I honestly think it is more for the mothers than the little girls at that point. As far as bathing suits and thongs! are you kidding, I often think that these kinds of pageants are breeding grounds for pedofiles. Its all a little creepy to me.

SAY WHAT????? BATHING SUITS AND THONGS ON LITTLE GIRLS????????? THOSE MOTHERS ARE JUST BEGGING FOR THEIR LITTLE GIRL TO GET KIDNAPPED BY A PEDOPHILE AND MOLESTED OR RAPED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT IS JUST SICK!

C. - posted on 12/31/2009

It's sickening to see those moms do that to their little girls.. They are LITTLE girls, they shouldn't be mini adults! They should stick to being just the little girl that they are! That reminds me of when I went to the BX the other day and saw the little girls clothing section as I went to Customer Service.. It was all mini women's clothing! There was hardly a piece of clothing that said little girl! I think some moms just want to have a mini me, if that's the case they should get a doll and dress it up as an adult, do the hair and nails.. It's just as sick to do that as it is to do it to their little girls, but at least they aren't exploiting their children for their sick twisted competition hungry fantasy.

Heather - posted on 12/30/2009

I think there are harmless toddler beauty pageants, and then there are the hardcore pageants that have all the crazy mothers yelling at their little daughters to smile bigger, or they make their little girls practice their routine for hours, the poor kids dont enjoy that! I honestly think it is more for the mothers than the little girls at that point. As far as bathing suits and thongs! are you kidding, I often think that these kinds of pageants are breeding grounds for pedofiles. Its all a little creepy to me.

JL - posted on 12/30/2009

I am not a fan of beauty pageants! I think it is absurd that as women young and old we have a forum where we are judged on how we look in crap loads of makeup, spray tans, hair pieces, and swim suits in order to recieve trophies, money, and college scholarships.



I WILL NEVER EVER put my daughter in a pageant.I don't want her thinking that it is the outside that counts. I already have to battle enough with trying to dispel the beauty myth that women young and old are drawn into. I would rather put her in dance competitions, music competitions, and other arts and intellectual pursuits that emphasize talent and brains not looks......especially false hyper inflated looks.



Inner beauty and intellect is what we concentrate and focus on in our family.



That show Toddlers and Tiaras is nothing but a SAD SAD commentary on our society. I was back stage at a beauty pageant once and it was one of those no makeup casual dress pageants.....I was horrified when I heard 4 and 5 year old girls talking about how one other little girls dress was "cheap" and how she had a big nose. The other little girl sat in a corner with her mom crying...yea, great environment for young girls.

Krista - posted on 12/30/2009

The little country fair pageants are fine, as they usually don't require much more than a pretty dress and a talent. But yeah...the hardcore ones are just sicko. I was reading that in one of the Toddlers and Tiaras episodes, they were discussing the swimsuit competition (which is seriously offensive, in and of itself), and an organizer said, "We don't allow thongs." At that point you'd think, well, of course! Thongs are completely inappropriate for children! Nope. Her rationale was that "it's just really hard to pull off wearing a thong."

I swear, when historians look back at the downfall of our civilization, toddler beauty pageants will definitely factor in amongst the symptoms of our decline.

Pamela - posted on 12/30/2009

I actually watched that show yesterday about this Western themed pageant yesterday and I could not believe it. I myself have been told that I should place my daughter in pageants and photo contests. I entered her in ONE photo contest and she won but I would NEVER do it again nor would I EVER put my daughter in a pageant. I mean come on... manicures, pedicures, highlights, spray tans and fake nails? They treat these kids like they are 18 not 8. It's sad.....blah blah blah "it builds self-confidence" HA yea right...all it builds is vanity which leads to "being beautiful" and bulimia. It is sad that these parents live vicariously through their daughters. I hate that they do this.

Lindsay - posted on 12/30/2009

I did one when I was five. It was a local fair one and I had fun with it. I haven't put my daughter in one and more than likely won't unless she just really shows an interest for it. As far as the ones on that show, they are WAY overboard and very disturbing. And the amount of money invested in them makes me little sick.....

Christy - posted on 12/30/2009

i am also sickened by the pageants that require things like spray tanning, wigs, and flippers to win. i would never consider doing the ones with make-up. i did however get an invite to put my daughter in a natural "pageant". all it is is a talent competition and a dressy and casual outfit competition. it is stated in the rules that you're not allowed to use make-up of any kind except for clear lip gloss or do anything unnatural to their hair that would require any kind of hair spray. i have considered this one just to see if my daughter would like it but i don't have the money (the entry fee is $100 plus the cost of outfits) and don't consider it to be a reasonable expense.