When to whip it out....

Allie - posted on 05/12/2011

I guess it comes down to personal choices? I didn't feel comfortable just pulling my breast out in public so I got a "hooter hider" or would use a blanket and I nursed everywhere... That said, I don't really want to see some woman's breasts and I don't want my husband or son looking at breasts... I would prefer it if everyone used some discretion when out in public.. but like I said.. it comes down to personal choices and comfort.

Allie - posted on 05/12/2011

I guess it comes down to personal choices? I didn't feel comfortable just pulling my breast out in public so I got a "hooter hider" or would use a blanket and I nursed everywhere... That said, I don't really want to see some woman's breasts and I don't want my husband or son looking at breasts... I would prefer it if everyone used some discretion when out in public.. but like I said.. it comes down to personal choices and comfort.

Jenn - posted on 05/09/2011

Nursing my babies comfortably and with a reasonable amount of discretion worked best for me. It drives me nuts to see a mother draw unnecessary attention to herself and the fact that she's breastfeeding in public. Overkill. My focus was taking care of my baby's needs, not getting kudos or a startled reaction when I whipped out my giant milk jugs. I also felt I was being respectful to my little ones who were nursing. They got to relax (because I was relaxed) under a light cover and get into their baby zone of contentment while their tiny hand patted my boob with love. Those were my moments with my babies. No one else needed to be a part of it.

Mel - posted on 05/08/2011

I definately cover up. I would not feel comfortable otherwise. Actually I dont generally feed inpublic. TOo hard to stay covered. I go to the car or a feeding room anywhere secluded

Nicole - posted on 05/08/2011

Heck Laura, I even feed mine where it is NOT okay to have food or drink. LOL I promise that I'm not going to pull him off and start squirting my breast milk everywhere just for S&G. he he Although, that sounds like a pretty funny thought. Done it to my husband a few times when he would joke with me about my breast milk, but that's another story. =D

Isobel - posted on 05/07/2011

feed your babies anywhere everybody else would be allowed to eat. That is all

Minnie - posted on 05/07/2011

But if you're expecting them to cover that's expecting them to hide, isn't it? Accept breastfeeding- it's all or nothing. No conditions.



Yeah, my 2 1/2 year old would be tickled pink to have to nurse with a blanket over her head. But that's probably totally wrong to most people, me nursing a toddler in public.

Brie - posted on 05/06/2011

I don't think that someone should just "whip it out" no I think there should be a cover of some sort. be it a blanket or the cover thingy they make for it or what have you... I BF my son in public several times and one time i can think of my younger brother asked me why i was doing it in public and why wasn't i worried about getting thrown out of the store or people talking and being rude (he was 13 then) and i explained to him that it is perfectly natural and if anyone had a problem with it then thats their own problem and i didn't care... as far as being thrown out i wouldn've loved to see the store i was in throw me out for it... now if it was just at home with baby and hubby then i didn't cover up but other places i tried to be respectful about it by covering up... I know a while back i heard about a woman who was on a talk show or new cast or something talking about BF and she told them how it made her feel good to BF (meaning the bond and knowing she was doing right by her child) and they took her child away from her and i don't remember hearing anymore as to whether or not she got them back... but they were taken from her because they accused her of being a pedifile all because of a mistaken phrase... back to the question ... i don't think BF moms should be made to hide as long as they are covered somehow and not just hanging out then i don't see a problem!

Kimberly - posted on 05/04/2011

I "whip it out" whenever its needed. None of my children liked to be covered so therefore I didn't. On a trip to DC last October I breastfed my daughter through the Nations Capitol, Smithsonians, and yes I even "whipped it out" inside The White House....LOL My philosophy has always been if me feeding my child bothers you then you're staring too hard.

Kathy - posted on 05/04/2011

This is getting a bit tedious. It should be a non-issue. Feed your baby when she needs it, but if you're not comfortable feeding in public, then don't. If you'd prefer to cover, then cover.

Personally, i think those ridiculous covers create problems - to me, they shriek "Hey, I'm breastfeeding! Look at me!"

My breastfeeding days are long gone, but I always felt that if people are going to be offended about seeing a breastfeeding mum, that's their problem, and I felt no obligation to pander to their issues.



But it's not my decision - it's each individual mother's decision. There's no "one size fits all" answer.

Nicole - posted on 05/04/2011

How is it disrespectful if one doesn't "find somewhere else to go" or cover to breastfeed? I don't know any breastfeeding woman who just "whip it out for the masses to see" as if they are only breastfeeding for the sole purpose of wanting people to stare at their boobs instead of just wanting to feed their hungry child.



By the way, discretion is relative to each individual. I see no problem with a woman breastfeeding in public EVEN if I do happen to see her boob. I'm not bothered by breasts. Which is a good thing since most women walk around with more cleavage showing in their everyday clothing than many nursing moms show while nursing their babies! I guess since you feel that someone should hide to breastfeed that all women should never wear anything revealing out in public either. And the argument that women breastfeeding in public are asking for people to stare at their breasts is like saying that a woman wearing a short skirt is asking to be raped. Both seem absurd to me.

Barb - posted on 05/04/2011

without reading all 12 pages, when i BF Jr i tossed a blanket over my shoulder and chest, kinda like a little feeding tent going on in there. Made me more comfortable, and probably people around me. Jr didn't seem to care one way or another.

I'm sure i'll have more to say after the 12th page.

Tina - posted on 05/01/2011

If my baby is hungry im going to feed the little one, and i plan to brestfeed, why you think we have them. I dont see why people make a big deal out of it.
This topic is stupid i think, when there are pepole out there that swear, makeout, wear cloths that dont cover, and you think brestfeeding in public is wrong, like come on.

Mary Renee - posted on 04/30/2011

Wow, just read some of these post... you have got to be kidding me! Some people say "be discrete like don't show any skin or nipple" or "don't pull your boob out of the top of your shirt." Hahaha, I TOTALLY do both those things! I mean I don't show nipple because it's in my baby's mouth but I do not care if you see the top of my boob. You can see the top of my boob when I'm wearing a shirt. I'm 24 for christ's sake. I'm not dressing like the Queen of England so I can nurse discretely. I wear a stretchy top and pull it down, haha. So easy. Do you seriously think I have money to buy some ridiculous nursing top that I'm only going to wear for like two years? If you would like to buy that for me, be my guest, but I'm not spending extra money for YOUR comfort, my budget is tight enough as it is with a new baby. Nursing tops are definitely not a priority for me.



I do not think being courteous to others means I have to make an extra effort to hide myself. I mean, would it be courteous of me to walk around with a blanket and cover your head with it every time you try to eat in public? Haha, yeah right! With that logic no one can go to a restaurant unless they're wearing a burka... or else they aren't being courteous!

Melanie - posted on 04/30/2011

Most folks had no idea I was breastfeeding while i was in public, I had a nursing camisole that i wore while i was out (self-conscious about my tummy when my shirt was up) ....other mothers just thought i was snuggling my baby close till they saw the jaw movement....I think that wearing a cover just draws attention to what you are doing. Nipple is only visible till baby is latched on, then rest the shirt close to his face and keep on going about what your are doing. Parks, grocery lines, dr offices...didn't matter, no one actually noticed till they were up in our space.

Constance - posted on 04/30/2011

I think a woman should cover up and only because we peverted a##holes out there. Nursing is the most natural thing a woman can do for her child, but there are plenty of idiots out there.

Mary Renee - posted on 04/29/2011

I HATE when people have the balls to suggest I be discrete when I'm feeding my children. Look away, asshole. It's a lot easier for the rare loser that's offended to divert their attention then it is for me to gather up all my belongings along with my hungry crying infant and find some dark secluded spot just so I can feed her.



This is exactly the reason I make a point to breastfeed in public. I want to normalize it so people start to recognize it for what it is - THE NORMAL THING TO DO WHEN YOU HAVE AN INFANT!



I breastfeed everywhere and I am so proud of the convenience it offers. I've breastfed in line at the pharmacy, while ordering photos printed out at Target, I've even breastfed while shopping the sale rack at Forever 21. I have a cover. I use it when I'm indoors at a crowded place, but if I'm at the beach or in a park... forget that, I'll "whip it out" with no shame.



Again, it's not like I'm an exhibitionist stripper swinging my boobs around for tips hoping to sexually excite you. You can't even see the nipple, it's covered by my baby's head.



I'm so sick of this argument. Thank God I don't care what all these whining busy bodies think. Next time I'm whipping it out with no cover just to spite Bethany Frankel. God, her daughter was like 4 pounds when she was born - eat a freaking cheeseburger, Bethany!

OhJessie - posted on 04/29/2011

Most other cultures don't mind seeing mothers nursing (after all you really don't see much anyway.) The only way our culture is going to get over this sex-boob hangup is to normalize nursing and stop hiding our babies/breasts under blankets. They'll adjust eventually. In the meantime, oh well.

Laura Zoey - posted on 03/04/2011

:) awesome idea! Heehee

Becky - posted on 03/03/2011

I shall bring a large pile of muslin squares and discreetly hand them out so that those who cant cope can discreetly place them over there heads and discreetly mind there own fucking business!

Krista - posted on 03/03/2011

Becky, you crack me up. If I ever get the nerve to nurse in public, I want you sitting next to me.

Becky - posted on 03/03/2011

Go for it, at worst some fuckwit will give you a dirty look, or tut at you [try not to stick your fingers up, it always looks a bit low rent when your nursing]
And at best you will encourage other mums to nurse in public and "normalise" the most natural thing in the world,

Laura Zoey - posted on 03/03/2011

Maybe we all ne to start showing some more skin, hmm :)
Eric always tries to pull my shirt up higher, and I usually stop him, but honestly idk why I bother. Next time he tries, I'll let him and see what happens!

Becky - posted on 03/03/2011

I just watched that video, its great, i have never thought about breastfeeding in terms of feminism. i am really lucky in that it is absolutely the done thing in cambridge everyone in our church, play group, cafe, pub,etc.... breastfeeds, you are far more likely to get a smile and a look of wistful reminiscence, or tenderness than a spiteful stare or comment. [And I'm a whip it out the top of my shirt couldn't give a shit if i offend you breastfeeder!]

Minnie - posted on 03/02/2011

Sara H- make sure to use the words boobies and nipples frequently!



They really don't care about the breastfeeding- I never once knew of a mother to bottle feed in our church. But don't DARE do it in sight of a man!

Laura Zoey - posted on 03/02/2011

Stupid iPad, idk how to double click on it. And every time I go to facebook or COM on our desk top I get a virus. :( I got a link to the video posted but it's not working when I click on it.

*Fluffy Bunnies - posted on 03/02/2011

Yeah, her response was they make pumps and bottles or the mom could have used better judgement as far as where she sat. But don't worry, she supports BF. Just don't do it in any public location where she or someone else that might be offended would be. I think it's time for some spring cleaning on my facebook page.

Good Day! - posted on 03/02/2011

Lisa, I'm tempted to stir the pot and make a comment on your facebook about how wonderful it is that these women are using their breasts as God intended...to feed their babies.

Minnie - posted on 03/02/2011

I've actually had no replies. LOL I think they're all too scared (I have a few fundamental Baptists on my page and the first part of the video about women's dress and modesty really gets to them).

Krista - posted on 03/02/2011

Good for you, Sara!!! Did she say anything about it?

*Fluffy Bunnies - posted on 03/02/2011

I actually just copied and pasted it to a status of a "friend" who was bitching about a mom not "having the decency to cover up." And OMG, that BF skank had the nerve to sit right beside the condiments at the fast food restaurant. *eye roll*



And Laura, when I see a video I want to get the link to I double click it and it should take you straight to the YouTube page to get the link. Or you can search "Covering Up is a Feminist Issue" on YouTube and it should pop up.

Good Day! - posted on 03/01/2011

I saw that video on KellyMom's facebook page. If you go there and see the video, it may be easier to copy it to your facebook page.

Johnny - posted on 03/01/2011

At least that's how it works when I'm using Firefox.

Johnny - posted on 03/01/2011

I just double-clicked on the video Sara posted which sent me to You Tube. Look under the video frame for a little "share" button and then click on the choice for Facebook share. It will pop up a little Facebook window, just click 'post' and it should appear on your profile automatically.

Laura Zoey - posted on 03/01/2011

I can't get it to copy....how do I set it to my wall? Anyone help :(

Johnny - posted on 03/01/2011

I shall do the same Krista! Thanks for posting it Sara.

Krista - posted on 03/01/2011

I've posted it on my wall, and anybody who doesn't like it can go piss up a stump. :)

Laura Zoey - posted on 03/01/2011

Great idea Lisa, I think I'll do that!

Minnie - posted on 03/01/2011

Hoo boy the comments I would get it I posted THAT video on my wall.



Thank you, Sara, for posting it!

Laura Zoey - posted on 03/01/2011

Awesome video Sara!
Love it, and my favorite picture on there was the adorable baby who had his hand resting on moms boob while eating, seriously adorable when Eric does that!
Oh and the baby with two hands on the boob squeezing it! So cute!

*Fluffy Bunnies - posted on 03/01/2011

Laura Zoey - posted on 03/01/2011

Don't worry krista! There's more women supportive of bf in any way shape or form, then there is women who have specific guidelines to which it's appropriate.
I've bf Eric in public many times a week for more then a year, and I've had one woman say something to me, it was praise that I bf my toddler in public, she was so happy to see it and encouraged me to never be ashamed even tho he was so big ;) I've had two separate times an old lady smile at me while I fed him, one even gave a thumbs up with the smile! Other then that I've had NO person look or say anything.
And I even have tried to chose spots to feed him where there's alot of people around, food courts, bench at the mall, swings at the park, couch in the furniture section at target :0 and really most people look, notice what I'm doing, look once more, and keep on with their path. No judgement I've seen at all.

Krista - posted on 02/28/2011

Exactly, Lisa. Some of us, due to having larger breasts, have a really hard time breastfeeding discreetly.

Like I said in an earlier post, when I nursed, I had to use the clutch hold, which yes, would expose the overwhelming majority of my breast. I could probably try to cover up with a blanket, but I've tried it before, and it just slips off, due to my having to hold the baby with one hand and my breast with the other hand.

I just wish that people like Jess and Kaitlin would stop assuming that when they see a woman's entire breast, it's automatically because the woman is "flashing" or "showing off" her boobs for the whole world to see.

Maybe, what looks like "flashing" to them, is her being as discreet as she can, under her own particular set of circumstances.

And like I said earlier, hearing attitudes LIKE Jess's and Kaitlin's, and knowing that they are definitely not alone...well, the prospect of being able to un-self-consciously breastfeed in public someday? It's receding farther and farther into the distance.

Minnie - posted on 02/28/2011

Kaitlin why don't you read the replies to Jess's statements? You're pretty much making similar comments. Some mothers -cannot- breastfeed without a significant portion of their breasts exposed.



Don't like it, don't look. And if you do see it, I highly doubt the world will come crashing down upon you.



Also, if you would like to emphasize- put your words and then.

Toni - posted on 02/28/2011

I don't know of any BF mums who just sit there with their breast hanging out and if they were just sitting around with their breasts hanging out and not even attempting to feed their child it would be socially unacceptable the same as it would for a none BF mum, nobody is denying that.

Again I have never felt the need to hide the fact I am eating, so why should a BF mum hide the fact their child is eating just because they may show a bit of breast, which when the baby is latched would show no more flesh than a low cut top. Many children do not like the cover so why should they have to be hidden because you have an issue with breasts being shown!

Children do not view breasts as sexual objects until we make them sexual objects, that is why people are able to do extended BF without it being sordid! I have no issue with my son seeing breasts, he comes into the female changing rooms with me and is able to see women in a whole host of nudity, why should that be an issue? I wonder why it is more offensive to you for your son to see a womans breasts than it is if your daughter were to, if it would affect one it would affect the other.

Oh and when you capitalise ONE word that is emphasis, when you capitalise a whole sentence that is shouting, for future reference :-)

Teresa - posted on 02/28/2011

I've seen way more boob by women 'fully' dressed in public than I've ever once seen by a woman breastfeeding in public.

The day a man 'flashes his junk' in front of my kids to feed his baby will be one shocking day.... for many reasons.

Emphasizing is when the occasional word is capitalized in a normal sentence. Yelling is when many are.... and you use !!!

Who on this post isn't respectful when they breastfeed in public? I have a feeling that not one single woman on this post intentionally flops their boob all around while feeding their kid. We're just supporting a woman's right to feed their baby however it may be neccessary.

And again, all points are lost when you (or anyone) puts breastfeeding and pooping in the same paragraph. THAT is way more offensive than someone accidently showing a bit of boob.

*Fluffy Bunnies - posted on 02/28/2011

And the point of the other side was that mom's don't ever just sit there with their breast hanging out. Even when nursing if she didn't cover at all then her baby's head would be covering most of her breast.

Ok, since we have a lot of BF moms here...how many of you just sit with your whole breast ("tit included") just hanging out? Anyone? Anyone? Didn't think so.

Kaitlin - posted on 02/28/2011

I wouldn't be rude to someone if they are breast feeding in public. I don't care. I just care when there are those women who show off litterally their whole intire boob right before latching there kid to it. All I say is be respectful to everyone else around you and make sure youre not flashing them. That's all. Geesh! And I never said that I care if your own kids see you do it, or if mine see me do it...I just don't want my son being exposed to breasts all hanging out at the moment. He's too little to be seeing that side of another woman. That's all. I have no problem with breast feeding moms and I agree it is a very natural thing to do and is really aweosme. But I still don't want to be flashed by your whole boob. Ok.........

Kaitlin - posted on 02/28/2011

Wasn't shouting just emphasing. And I do understand. More than you know. And I was only getting irratated because no one was getting what I was saying even though it seemed so obvious. And like I said, I don't care if you breast feed in public or if a tiny part of boob is showing, I just don't want to look in one direction and all of a sudden see someone's whole breast, tit included. Sure feed your baby where you want. Whatever. But if a regular woman can't sit in public with her boobs hanging out, than why just because your a mom and breastfeeding do you feel that it is ok for you to do it. It's not that hard to take a baby blankie and cover up the majority of your boobs. And no I don't think my kids would be scared of boobs, I'm not that dumb, but I don't feel it is appropriate for a woman to have their boobs hanging out for my son in particualr to see. I don't think it's going to scare him, but that doesn't mean I want him to see all that at this age. Do you want some random woman flashing her goods for not only the whole world but for your son to see. It would be the same as a man flashing his junk for you daughter to see. Boobs are still a sexual part of the woman's body. And I'm not insecure. I just show my husband respect and make sure that I'm not revealing those parts of my body for anyone but him. And by the way, it is very hard not to look, especially for a man, not to look when there are boobs hanging out.

*Fluffy Bunnies - posted on 02/28/2011

"I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO!!"

But you do care since you had a set of rules for BF in public to follow that statement. The points are all moot because a vast majority of breastfeeding moms aren't shaking their girls all around just for fun before they latch baby on. Many moms try their hardest not flash the world, but they shouldn't have to stress out that someone will be rude to them if they do accidently. And, I want my kids to see breastfeeding as much as possible. I would *love* to see more BF moms where I live and I want my daughter and future children to know that this is just a normal part of having a baby.