When to whip it out....

Minnie - posted on 02/14/2011

As I mentioned before, there are plenty of people who believe that women should never wear pants- men's eyes apparently wander and will have -lustful- thoughts of these women when they see the separation of their legs in pants, the shape of their rear in the jeans and their hips. Why should -I- or any other woman have to worry about these people's issues?

She was not 'displaying' her breasts, Jess. She didn't have tassles or pasties on. She was nourishing and comforting her baby. No, I don't have to have been there. I unequivocally support her right to nourish her baby wherever she is- and in whatever manner she deems most comfortable for her and her baby.

She wasn't asking for you or anyone else to come and have a conversation. I'm sure that if you had turned and gone and done something else she wouldn't have been offended. You don't have to smile and nod at a breastfeeding mother- we don't ask for your approval. Just go about your own business and let her do hers.

Charlie - posted on 02/14/2011

Seriously , don't like it , stop staring ...look away .

If a person takes issue with a woman's nutritional breast than own your own problem , there is nothing wrong with a feeding child or a breast supplying nutrition , they should not have to hide and occasional flash of the Nipple will not kill anyone , I highly doubt the 100 strangers all had a problem with it ..not as you perceive it anyway most people in my experience don't care and those who do exaggerate to the extreme the " problem " with NIP.

Jess - posted on 02/14/2011

We don't cure people's aversion to BF by flashing our huge breast's to every stranger in the food court though. I think it comes down to a mutual respect. The public to respect a BF mothers rights, and the needs of her child. But also for BF mothers to respect that some people don't want to see their breasts. I have nothing against a mother feeding her child and being discreet. And if your more co-ordinated then me and you have large breasts and can feed without having your entire breast out on display then I fully support you.

But if like this woman, your just flashing your enormous breasts to 100 strangers, than your going to get backlash. And ultimately the BF community can work their arse's off to create a community where BF is encouraged, but it just takes 1 woman to un-do all the hard work. Like I said, I support BF mothers, but I believe this women went about it the wrong way.

Nikki - posted on 02/14/2011

I think that's the whole problem Jess, it's that for so long breasts have been sexual things and there was a trend of bottle feeding so a lot of society have become intolerant of breast feeding. It shouldn't matter about the woman's size or shape, she is doing the best thing for her baby. If all people could just see breast feeding mother's for what they are, feeding their babies not pervy sexual flashing knockers then there would be no problem. I find it hard to understand why people are so offended or uncomfortable with breast feeding.

Charlie - posted on 02/14/2011

I have an Aussie H cup I breastfed without covers and never had my breasts just hanging out , you could never see more than a little skin far less than ANYONE in a bikini so I disagree with the idea that large breasted women can't be discreet .

Jess - posted on 02/14/2011

Thats the thing though Lisa, do you turn your back on these people and therefore make them think you don't agree with BF, because thats what they will think.

If a mothers want to feed her child thats fine, but the entire food court doesn't need to see her breast's. Had this women had "average" size'd breast's we wouldn't be having this conversation. But this woman had extraordinarily mammoth breast's and I think she needed to be more aware of what she had on display.

For me, I have large breast's so I made the decision not to feed in public because I didn't want my breast's out there for strangers to see.

I would love to see a day where BF is the standard, mums felt comfortable to fed in public where appropriate. But when women as the one I mentioned, have so many people around them commenting and feeling uncomfortable it does nothing to help BF mothers in general. I mean how often do you see news articles where mums have been kicked off buses and alike for feeding their babies. There are loads of people who are completely against BF, they go into a public food court and here is this complete stranger with her breasts on display. Like I said, perhaps you had to be there but for me to think she was out of line as BF supporting is saying something !

Minnie - posted on 02/14/2011

Thanks for asking Lisa, what she could have done is walk the 3 metres the parents room that she was sitting right outside of.

And you could have just as easily walked away or turned your head. :)

I'm all for BF, but I think it should be done discreetly

If I had a nickel for every time I heard this...I'm all for -as long as-...well, no, you're not all for.

Nikki - posted on 02/14/2011

I breast fed everywhere, I never flopped them out for everyone to see, but I never covered myself or hid in a parents room or bathroom.

I have no problem with women breast feeding wherever they need to and hell if they flash a little nipple who cares, the baby needs to eat just like the rest of us.

If you don't like it don't look at it.

I remember when my daughter was 8 weeks old I was having huge problems with her latching. We were at a cafe and I spent about 10 minutes trying to get her to latch unsuccessfully. I had my mum with me and she was trying to help when this lady walked over to me. She was a lactation consultant from the local hospital, she introduced herself, grabbed my boob and my daughter and helped her latch. She was so lovely and really helped to reassure me. You should have seen the looks we got from some of the other people! But I couldn't care less, as I said before, you don't like it don't look.

Jess - posted on 02/14/2011

Thanks for asking Lisa, what she could have done is walk the 3 metres the parents room that she was sitting right outside of. I'm all for BF, but I think it should be done discreetly and perhaps this is one of those 'you need to be there' situations, but honestly she may as well have just been topless. Its the first time I have ever heard all the people around us actually commenting and people were avoiding walking past her. People felt uncomfortable and I think a simple shawl or moving into the parents room would have been fine. I believe breast is best, but people are put off by breast feeding when they are confronted with situations like this. BF mothers aren't helping their own cause and making public BF more accepted when they are making others uncomfortable. Had I heard people commenting if she was being discreet I would have been the first to jump to her defence because breast is best, but in this situation I believe this women went about it all the wrong way.

Minnie - posted on 02/14/2011

Hmmm....what should she have done, Jess? Suffocate her tot under a blanket? Neither of my girls have ever tolerated having a cloth over their heads while nursing- I attempted it a few times and they would get sweaty and uncomfortable- and once the kid is in perpetual motion good luck keeping the cloth in place.



Huh. If I saw her I would march right over and sit next to her and pop my 2 1/2 year old on. Areolas exposed be damned. How wonderful that she is choosing to nourish and comfort her little one when he or she needed it! And how wonderful that her body, despite not looking how others want her body to look, is healthy and working efficiently at its job!

Jess - posted on 02/14/2011

I never breastfed in public simply because I wasn't comfortable with it. I have massive breast's so there is simply no way to be discreet about it. We also had issues with attaching, so that would never have been a pretty sight in the local shopping centre.

I was lucky that our shops have very well equipped parenting rooms set up for private breastfeeding. Personally, I would rather see Bf mothers be discreet and cover up, but thats just me. I feel awkward when a mother whips out a breast. You don't want to look, you don't want to appear as though you don't approve, its just hard. In the food court one day a lady was BF and she was a big girl, her belly sat in her lap. her breast's were gigantic, they rested on belly that was resting on her lap..... she was breastfeeding, her child was at least 6 months old, and her breasts were so big that you could still see part of her nipple area even with her kids head there. I mean her breasts were massive. She may as well have just walked around topless really. She really needed to cover up !

I think its kind of funny because you can't put a picture up of bare breasts just for the hell of it. But put a baby in the picture and its fine.... just something I have noticed. The hospital my daughter was born in has a lot of breast and baby pictures, some of them had nothing to do with breastfeeding... it was just very strange.

I'm all for BF though, just think discretion is key.

Good Day! - posted on 02/14/2011

Toni, it took a while for me to BF in public. Finally, when she was four months old, I was stuck in a store during a rain storm without anymore pumped breastmilk...and she was hungry. No way I was nursing her in the bathroom. That was something I'd always refused to do. I usually resorted to nursing in the car. But like I said...rainstorm. My husband encouraged me and I relunctently (silly now, I shoulda whipped em out!) nursed her. A lady walked by...I braced myself...and she said how cute my daughters toes were sticking out. And that's it. Never hesitated again. =)

Sarah - posted on 02/14/2011

Lisa - Heaven forbid another man should lust after you because he sees a baby sucking on your tits! my ex actually found watching me breast feed to be a major turn off...i wonder if thats where our marriage went bust? ahh well maybe i should pretend to breast feed a doll might get me some action LOL

Charlie - posted on 02/14/2011

Haha I would pull my H bombs out whenever little man was hungry and in all honesty you really couldn't see much , I would actually have people coming up to pat his head and tell me how precious he was while I was feeding it was lovely !!

Minnie - posted on 02/14/2011

Toni- I never breastfed in public with my eldest. It was WRONG (read previous post about the church we attended) and OH NOES I could cause another man to LUST after me, LOL.



So I was nervous when I realized how ridiculous the philosophy of our church was- and decided to nurse Adelaide in public. It quickly became second nature though. I just choose not to worry about others' reactions and in truth I've only had one comment- and it was positive. But everyone has a different comfort level.



Hehe- newborns are so floppy and uncoordinated that it definitely can be a challenge to breastfeed in public. I bet you two can get the hang of it quickly though :).

Laura Zoey - posted on 02/14/2011

Toni, I am shocked at how quickly I got confident in public! It was three months when I ditched the cover and just used my shirt to cover. Looking back I don't understand why I was so worried, but for those few months I was so scared to bf without that cover!
I've only pulled my boob out the top when I'm in the check up room at the drs, and then I only convince myself with the logic that my dr has already seen my boobs so why worry!
It's so empowering to get that confidence in public, I'm sure you will do great!

Toni - posted on 02/14/2011

Lisa, I hope I can have half your confidence, if I can bf this child, it makes me nervous thinking about bf in public, although who knows after doing it a couple of times I may not be self conscious at all :-)

Teresa - posted on 02/14/2011

I still curl my son up on my lap like when he was a baby. He is HUGE compared to me, but it still works for us. We quit nursing in public quite a while ago though.

Minnie - posted on 02/14/2011

Ack! And the -male- waiter was serving us while we were at it ;). And my lovely husband didn't bat an eye.



Laura: Adelaide usually nurses straddling my lap. I have a rule- no wiggling or twisting- or you don't nurse. If she's serious she'll sit still.



Of course- you're pregnant- I do imagine that makes it difficult to find a good position that's comfortable.

Tah - posted on 02/14/2011

Lisa I hope they put your picture up with a big x through it so they know not to serve you again..lol....you ladies make me nervous for my niece who is a dd at 14....I can see surgery in her future....

Laura Zoey - posted on 02/14/2011

Lisa, does your daughter have a good nursing position at this age? I'm having a hard time getting Eric comfy now that he is so big, he always is twisting his hips or kicking up his legs or trying to turn on his back, etc. He just isn't comfy easily, especially when we are out in public with no couch armrests or pillows!
Maybe he is just too picky but the constant squirming is annoying and I suppose my belly isn't getting any smaller, so that makes it harder!

Minnie - posted on 02/14/2011

I'm a 30E and they're not that big. It equals about a C cup with a 32 band.

So yesterday we went to the Olive Garden and I -gasp!- nursed my 2 1/2 year old at the table...oooooh- and I pulled my boob out from the TOP of my shirt.

Even when I do that no one can really see anything, any more than a woman would show with a low-cut shirt.

Celeste - posted on 02/14/2011

I have big tatas too! LOL Nursing twins, I got to an E or F I think? Something like that. I HATE having big boobs. I'd LOVE to have a breast reduction one of these days.

But, yeah, that was one of the reasons why I didn't NIP with my first daughter. She was able to take a bottle with no problems.

My boys? One got nipple confusion and I worked SO hard to get him to latch. It took close to 2 months to get him to finally latch. There was no way in hell I was going to ruin all that hard work by giving him a bottle just because of someone's hang ups.

I just usually wore a loose t-shirt and I was able to get him latched on and nursing. No one knew a thing!

Toni - posted on 02/14/2011

I didn't even try and find the size of my boobs when my milk come in - I just stopped wearing bras until they were smaller because I was just far too big for the F cups I had and it was so uncomfortable wearing anything tight, I'm worried this time arond because my boobs never shrank back below the F they had grew to in pregnancy (from a DD) afterwards so I started at an F cup and have already got bigger so I don't know where I'm going to end up :-( I definately think smaller boobs would make bf in public easier - I had to manuever my breasts into a position to latch, so if he had of latched I may have been one of those mums who does have to take their breast out to latch their child on, public or not, I'll see hopefully this baby will be able to latch so my milk will last longer :-)

Sarah - posted on 02/14/2011

Loureen i think i was close to that too idk i didn't breast feed long i know theyve come down since i stopped just not sure by how much as i didn't bothered getting bras fitted cos i knew they wouldn't have anything

Charlie - posted on 02/14/2011

I was an H when my milk came in 0_O

Sarah - posted on 02/14/2011

pfft Laura DD? come one thats itty bitty titty stuff right there! I'm a G cup now never been below an E and even now I think an E cup is small (especially when the girl at bras n things told me she had an E cup they were like ping pong balls) i'd like to be a D one day...still get the pretty bras and still a handful

Kate CP - posted on 02/13/2011

I normally float around a D-DD...but now that I'm nursing I'm a solid E cup...and I ain't happy about it, neither. >:P

Good Day! - posted on 02/13/2011

Totally an A cup...nursing or not. Having a B or C would be nice...it should would be easier to fit into certain clothes. I'm proof that no boobs are too small to hold enough milk to feed a baby. =)

Laura Zoey - posted on 02/13/2011

Mine aren't even that big, but I still wish they were smaller!
At my biggest I have a DD and a D and now at the end of pregnancy they are down to a C and a B but I still think smaller would be nice!
I like sleeping on my stomach when I'm not preggo and my boobs always get in the way! And it's so much harder to carry a toddler with boobs in the way.

Krista - posted on 02/13/2011

It likely varies pretty widely from person to person. Plus, I had mine done back in '92, so it's possible that the techniques have changed somewhat.

I didn't find the pain was all that bad, actually. However, I did have to be careful for quite awhile. I think it was about 2 weeks before I could lift my arms over my shoulders, and about a month before I could do any heavy lifting.

It was so worth it, though. So worth it. If I hadn't had it done, I don't doubt for a second that I'd have the spine of an 80-year-old by this point.

Sarah - posted on 02/13/2011

Krista - I'm curious now as I think I'm going to have a reduction in the near future how long are you unable to do much for and how extensive is the pain

Krista - posted on 02/13/2011

Oh, DEFINITELY! I'm super-envious of women with smaller breasts. If I hadn't developed such huge boobs, I wouldn't have had to have had a breast reduction, which would have probably allowed me to nurse exclusively. Plus, with smaller boobs, it's just flat-out easier to nurse because you don't have to wrestle your boob into submission, or prop it up with a spare hand, a winch, and several pieces of hydraulic machinery.

Teresa - posted on 02/13/2011

There are advantages of being a member of the itty bitty titty committee..... lol

Krista - posted on 02/13/2011

LOL @Sarah! Yeah, that's why I just wasn't comfortable nursing in public. My boobs are ginormous, so there was just no way to discreetly nurse. Plus, due to my reduction, I had to supplement quite a bit.

So public nursing for me would have consisted of hauling out my gigantic boob, getting the baby into a clutch hold, getting him latched on, feeding him while everybody stared at the panoramic expanse of tit on display (no way to put on a cover, unless I grew a third hand), and then, I would have put my boob away, sat the baby up, and fixed him a bottle to drink.

It would have really just been a PG-13 display of utter pointlessness.

Sarah - posted on 02/13/2011

I just assumed that the reason I got so many looks was my oversized boobs...not many people have seen my boobs at my size that aren't fake could be a mixture of "omg she is feeding her child with her boobs!" and "holy mother above look at the size of that woman's tits! and they're real!"

Teresa - posted on 02/13/2011

I used a cover and would go in another room when feeding the girls... for the most part. It was easier and what I was comfortable w/ doing. For my son.... I only used a cover about 2-3 (maybe half a dozen) times while at church, but otherwise I just fed him anywhere he wanted/needed to be fed where I could sit semi-comfortably. My circumstances and comfort level changed and I just went w/ it.

Tah - posted on 02/13/2011

i guess i just associated that with having my boobs out and the comments people were making about people who have their breast out because it's monday..lol.my mom would tell us "you don't need to have your breast spilling out your shirt..just walk with your back straight and your head up and they will be where they need to"..lol, and other such tidbits...

Celeste - posted on 02/13/2011

And Tah, I am very modest but I never secluded myself away from anyone. I stopped using a cover when my boys started kicking at it, I stopped using it. In fact, I got so good that no one even knew I was nursing! Without a cover!

Krista - posted on 02/13/2011

That's exactly right, Celeste. Some mothers just feel more comfortable nursing in private. I was one of those. However, I would never dare to say that other mothers should do the same as I did. The most important thing is that the baby be fed.

Celeste - posted on 02/13/2011

If you use a cover, nurse in a secluded area because you feel more comfortable, I don't have an issue. What I *DO* take issue with are those who try to dictate on how others should NIP. The mom should do what's comfortable for HER.

Tah - posted on 02/13/2011

i did cover up, or go away from the crowd. I just did. i have bf in the car and come in after, gone in the bedroom when visting other people, of course in front of immediate family it was like whatever, but my mom was big on modesty..im not the girl with her boobs hanging out in a shirt,..i just didn't think everyone wanted to see and i didn't personally want everyone to see. i was also 16 and 21 with my first 2 so maybe i looked at it differently, and since it was what i did with the first 2, i just kept that up with the 3rd baby. i have never, before COM had alot of conversations..breastfeeding in public or taking it in private is one..myself and everyone i know tries to cover up, we never say, "o i'm covering up because people are uncomfortable" or "im not going to cover up because baby is hungry and it will take to long to walk a little ways to the feeding room" etc..we just used covers or made sure you couldn't see the breast between the shirt and the baby if the baby doesn't like covers, which alot don't. i guess we just looked at covering up or stepping away as the thing to do...now im not knocking anyone who doesn't cover up or step away, just saying what i and others i know, have done or do now...

Rosie - posted on 02/13/2011

i saw that show and i about shit, lol!! although i do agree that a little modesty is in order, going to some backroom, or sitting in the corner isn't necessary and pretty degrading.
so no i don't agree with her. i think it was pretty stupid of her actually to say that. why the fuck to people get all bent over someone feeding their kid? i dont' get it. sure, i'd like a little cover when attaching and unattaching, just in case a little nip shows, but if they don't i don't give a fuck. i don't have to look, first of all, and second IT'S SOMEONE FEEDING THEIR CHILD!! the mind boggles....

Sarah - posted on 02/13/2011

when i was breastfeeding (which is a long time ago) i just whipped out my "Tatas" (lol i love that some americans call them that) discreetly but if baby wanted to be fed he wasn't going to wait til i got halfway across a shopping centre to the parents room...he wanted to be fed and he wanted to be fed NOW!

Christina - posted on 02/12/2011

I'm sorry, bu I just saw this website, and it has pictures of ppl who shop in walmart. Boobs hanging out, butts hanging out, ect. THAT is what we should be outraged about. Not a woman breastfeeding her child. Breasts are only sexual objects because we have made them that way. Their only purpose is to feed our children.

Laura Zoey - posted on 02/12/2011

It really makes me uncomfortable seeing someone who is drunk. Also people who smoke or are smoking make me uncomfortable!
I just don't hang around those people, or I look away.
People with evil or scary or risqué tattoos make me uncomfortable too, and I don't want my kids seeing some of those types of tattoos, but I never thought about making a stink over it, it's their right, and it's my right to look away :)

Krista - posted on 02/12/2011

Lisa, that's an excellent point! I'm sure that there are some people of other cultures who are offended by the fact that I do not wear jeans and I do not cover my hair.

That's their problem, not mine.

There are some people who are offended by visible tattoos. Should every tattooed person walk around covered from head to toe, so as to avoid offending the gaze of someone who dislikes tattoos? Of course not.

Some people are very uncomfortable around the physically or mentally disabled. So should the latter cloister themselves away so that they don't make anybody uncomfortable? Obviously not.

I am in no way, shape or form uncomfortable when I see a woman nursing her baby. If you are, that's your prerogative. But you have no right to try to make another person rearrange themselves around YOUR hang-up.

Jayde - posted on 02/12/2011

For me it's simple

i think it's GOOD for children to see nursing mothers- it's normal.

I see SOOO many topless women at many beaches & no one is bothered by them. I think THAT's DISGUSTING..

I covered my daughter bc of my own comfort level but i love seeing (& not in a gross way) women bf in public it helps to normalise it. bottle fed babies don't have a cover over their head so why should bf babies????

Minnie - posted on 02/12/2011

Yes. I just don't see why it's so horrible for a child to see a woman's breast being used to feed and comfort her baby. Children are quite intuitive and accepting of the facts when we are honest.



All it takes is a "she's nursing her baby honey. Women have breasts to feed their babies."



I dunno. My nearly five year old is pretty cool about it.

Good Day! - posted on 02/12/2011

And Laura makes a GREAT point. Children should see boobs for what they were intended for!

True story: A mom in our music class was nursing her infant. I asked her if I could explain to Eliza what she was doing, as we have a baby coming very soon. She was happy to help me explain (without flashing my daughter, mind you). A few days later I was rubbing my belly and asked Eliza if she wanted to talk to the baby. She walked over and said very matter of factly, "Hey baby. Drink milk. Mama's booby."