To get the ball rolling...biting and hitting what to do

Nikki - posted on 04/02/2010 ( 16 moms have responded )

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Just thought I would share some information I found helpful and interesting from babycentre, I find they have some great information to give you an understanding of what is causing the behaviour and how to go about dealing with it, feel free to add anything that you may have felt helped you through the biting and hitting stages.



http://www.babycenter.com/0_aggression-h...

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Megan - posted on 04/06/2010

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In child care we used to have a biting warning, "our teeth are for eating, and our friends are not food." This is what we would say to any child who had bitten. After they hear it enough, you say, "this is our friend, is our friend food?" and they usually know the right answer. Of course, this doesn't really work for the younger age groups, especially ones young enough to be teething most of the time.

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Erin: the pic is VERY deceiving! LOL! She is an extremely chill baby.......she must get it from me cuz her daddy is an orangutang monkey! LOL! My MIL has told me some CRAZY stories! I just hope things continue this way? Crossing my fingers and toes!

Heather - posted on 04/16/2010

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my daughter was never a biter til she started dealing with one of her autism tutors from school i mean shes broken skin on the poor tutor i feel bad we've told her that biting isn't nice neither is hitting which she does too when she gets beyond frustrated what do ya do ya know besides ignore it which is what the tutors tell me but i don't want her to fell its okay to do that when shes mad or frustrated with the situation either

Amie - posted on 04/15/2010

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You know I can't remember mine ever really biting other then when they were teething. That was mostly my own fault too, gotta keep the fingers outta their mouths! LOL!



Our youngest does have a weird little personality already though. She's faked going to bite our feet a few times and just roars when you move and go ahh! She's so cute ♥ =)



Our son did go through a nasty aggressive stage. Thankfully it was mostly towards himself.. that sounds bad but I think you guys should understand what I mean. Continuing on... LOL!... He'd throw himself into such bad fits you couldn't reason with him at all. So we'd pick him up and place him in his room. He'd throw himself on the floor, kick, scream and hit. He even punched himself in the head a few times if he got really worked up. Which is when we started the skills for success program (mentioned it on another thread here). He's improved drastically since then. I really don't know what brought it on but he never went after his sister's with his aggression, he never hit myself or my husband intentionally, he'd just go completely spastic and we'd have to put him in his room to give him his space to calm down. It was nuts!



Edit to Add: He has been to numerous specialists too. He's a perfectly normal boy, they aren't sure as of yet what the aggression was about but with his improved listening and speech it's all but gone away. (He had hearing problems) He still has his moments but they are nowhere near what they were. The school is keeping an eye on him and so are we. If it crops back up, he'll be assessed again. His bio-father does have tourettes though so it might be that. There's also learning disabilities to watch out for (our oldest has them and so do I). Extreme frustration could bring it on.



Our daughter's have not (so far anyway) shown any signs of having the same type of issues. Our toddler I can't remember hitting but I'm sure she has at some point. LOL! It wasn't a long lasting phase in any case (otherwise I would remember it). Now she just crosses her arms, yells NO I don't want it/too. Then stomps off to her room. It's actually quite comical but I contain my laughter in front of her. =)

Erin - posted on 04/15/2010

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I think it comes down to the child's temperament. Like I have said plenty of times, Milla is VERY full on. She's boisterous, confident and very strong-willed. She's 14 months and started hitting a couple of months ago. It coincided with her teething (and she's a terrible teether) but I'm pretty sure it would have happened at some point with her.

Maybe you've just got a more relaxed, placid child? Although she doesn't really look it in your profile pic lol.

[deleted account]

Apparently children do go thru a phase fairly early on where they become more aggressive?.....biting, kicking, hitting etc.......does anyone know typically at what age it happens? Roxanne is 19 months now and I can say she honestly has NEVER been aggressive.......except one time when her teeth were bugging her and she chomped down on the side of her crib and kept biting the crib but it was an isolated incident! I'm honesly wondering if this is the calm before the storm......other moms keep telling me, " oh, she'll go thru it too.....just wait! " ? Does anyone know if there's any truth to that or did I just luck out?

Erin - posted on 04/15/2010

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Milla is not a biter, but she does hit. This behaviour started while she was getting her molars, so intellectually I know that it comes from pain, frustration and confusion. But it's still not cool! Every time it happened - and it still does occasionally - I put her down or moved her away and ignored her. She consistently got the message that if she hit, Mummy wouldn't play with or talk to her. It doesn't happen nearly as often now, but she does have a fiery little temper and dominant personality so it's something I had to get on top of quickly.

Meghan - posted on 04/03/2010

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my son was never really a biter but the one time he did bite me (around a year old) I was so shocked (and it really actually hurt) that I let out a scream and tears welled up. He looked at me wide eyes (probably as shocked as I was!) gave me a hug and he hasn't bitten again! Thank God I have a sensitive little man because I know this can be a huge issue for some!

[deleted account]

Jessica, I've had the same thing with the biting while feeding. Once he tried it so I broke the latch and told him not to bite mummy cause it hurt. He tried it again so I did the same thing. Third time and I put him down on the floor - he was not happy! I just gave him a minute then picked him up and let him continue feeding - no more biting!

Jessica - posted on 04/03/2010

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Yikes I haven't had to deal with aggressive behavior..yet.. I don't have much advice! Kieran went through a few phases when I was still nursing him where he would bite- NOT fun! A few times when he did it it was so suddenly painful and shocking that I actually yelled (not intentionally, involuntarily!) and it scared him so bad that he started crying. I felt sooooo bad! But I started breaking the latch and just telling him no firmly. It took a lot of repetition; eventually he would stop though. Sometimes he gets quite upset when I tell him no, I think he's pretty sensitive so I want to be careful not to scare him or hurt his feelings, but still get the point across...

[deleted account]

WOW! Nikki, good for you for calling family services......I can't believe that woman! That's the very reason I feel blessed to be able to stay at home with my daughter as long as we feel necessary!

So, we're getting quite the arsenal of weapons to deal with hitting and biting.....dropping the child.......squirting the biters! We're well on our way! ;) Any others? C'mon ladies, don't be shy! LMAO! I'm just bugging! I've never had to deal with any situations like that but I've got my water bottle handy Nikki! heehee....

Nikki - posted on 04/03/2010

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On my first day of prac experience for my studies I spoke to a mother's who's 6 month old son was teething, she said "he is teething and really bad at biting so we just have to let him have his dummy all day" So mum leaves and the old troll who was the teacher took the dummy off him and put him into this little porta cot with a few toys, and that is where he stayed for the whole two weeks I was there, all day. I asked her why she didn't just give him his dummy like mum had asked and she said "dummies are only for sleep time, and he is too much hard work if you let him out because he bites everyone" Slightly dumbfounded and very concerned about what I had observed I rang family services on my last day and complained about them, years later I hear that lady was fired the week after I left because family services had done a spot check and caught her.

When I was working in a nursery it was a really hot day and I had 2 ten month olds sitting on my knees in just their nappies, one leaned over and latched onto the others shoulder and would not let go! The child was screaming and I was trying to get him off without pulling him because it can break the skin, in the end I had my water bottle next to me so I squirted the biter in the chest and he let go, possibly out of shock. Not that I would advocate that as a behaviour management strategy, but with no other option it did work!

Jess - posted on 04/03/2010

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Come to think of it... it explains a lot !! But no really he is a great guy, and a wonderful dad ! My mother just wasn't expecting him to sink his teeth in and she said it really hurt, she felt terrible for dropping him though. As horrible as it sounds though, it did the trick !

[deleted account]

Jess, that's hilarious.....well, not really but you know what I mean!? LOL!

How did ur bro turn out?

Jess - posted on 04/03/2010

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My mother found a full proof method to cure biting. When my brother was young he bite her one day and she was so shocked she dropped him, he never bite again. Hehehe Not that I'm advocating bouncing your biter off the floor boards though !

[deleted account]

Bite back! LOL! Just kidding! Do you know how many times I've heard people say that? How is it possible that anyone could possibly think that biting a 3 year old is the answer? Ugh!



Roxanne hasn't been aggressive so far and I'm sooo grateful but I'd be kidding myself to think there will never come a day?! Thanks for the article Nikki!

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