Near-tantruming at me when lay down to change diaper

Jessica - posted on 10/06/2009 ( 7 moms have responded )

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My son is nearly 13 months. Lately he's been screaming at me, arching his back, & trying to roll over when I lay him on his changing table to change his diaper. I think mostly b/c he doesn't want to be set down. (Sometimes he doesn't arch & yell, but just rolls over & pulls himself to a stand, using the wall behind the table so he can look at the picture on the wall.) I also say it's time for a diaper change on the way to his room before I even set him on the changing table. While he's doing this I tell him it's time for a diaper change (what I have always said), or I'm trying to change your diaper...I'll even do belly buzzers, which will usually get him to laugh instead of scream...I give him things to look at & hold to distract him. But I have to wrestle to get to his diaper & when I finely get to it well enough to open one side, he quits fighting & stays still for me.

Any advice on how to get him to stop fighting it so much at the start of the change. I feel like a horrible mom when I feel myself getting even a little frustrated, but I'm at a loss & need some advice...

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Chelseaszidik - posted on 10/07/2009

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I am not able to change my daughter standing up due to the use of cloth diapers with a snappi so I have a few tricks:

I start off by laying her down and of course she starts getting angry but I always have something she really likes to hand her like her toothbrush. (something she doesn't have all day so it's novel)

I make it a game. I keep my hand on her but disappear over the edge of the changing table and pop back out saying "peek-a-boo!"

I also sing silly songs like "If all the rain drops" that have mouth movements.

When I take her pants of I shake a bit more than necissary and say "Shakka, shakka, shakka" she thinks that is pretty funny.

I talk to her the entire time and make silly faces and sounds to keep her at ease and entertained.

I also move fast!

If she gets really upset I sympathis with her and do some of the dr. karp stuff. I mirror back her emotion and say things like "you look, sad, sad, mad, mad, sad, you want to get up, up, up. You say 'No mommy, no, up, up, up" And then "but almost done, then we can do ------". My validating her feelings I am showing her that I understand and I care.

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Jessica - posted on 10/15/2009

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Thank you for all your suggestions...he's not doing it anymore...it was just a weird phase

Marcy - posted on 10/08/2009

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Try letting him stand up when you take the diaper off and then change him on the floor. We just put a towel down and used that. He always helped by holding his fresh diaper or the wipe box (which was fun).

Jessica - posted on 10/08/2009

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on the main page of this community Chelsea posted a video w/ Dr Karp, his book is "The happiest toddler on the block"...I haven't read it, only watched to video clip

Minnie - posted on 10/08/2009

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Oooh who's Dr. Karp? Sounds similar to a book I'm reading called "How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk.

Jessica - posted on 10/07/2009

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I can't do the stand up change b/c I'm not that talented/coordinated...lol! Thanks for your suggestion Lisa! ^_^
I've been trying the novel toy thing w/ him. It helps most of the time. When I take off his pants I will lay them over his face to play peek-a-boo...but it doesn't always help. I talk to him & try to keep it fun & light.
I've been kind of doing the dr. Karp stuff, but I don't match his emotion, I just say it & he will calm down...it seems odd to me to do it w/ the same emotional level & thankfully he gets that I get what he doesn't want to do, w/out me having to do it to the same level he is.
It's a little better, but not perfect & it doesn't happen every time, thankfully!

Thanks a bunch!!! ^_^ I think more than anything else I needed to vent my frustration w/ it...lol!!!

Minnie - posted on 10/07/2009

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Simple thing I do: I don't lay her down for a diaper change!



Totally can understand- being on one's back is a vulnerable position, and to be held in place there when you've got a body that just wants to go-go-go!



Try swinging him up on your hip, or have him stand while you put the diaper on, or sit him facing away from you in your lap while you put it on.



Most of my daughter's poos I manage to get in the pot, but for those that don't I simply wash her bum off in the sink (we don't use wipes) she loves playing with the water from the faucet.

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