2 Going on 3 won't poop on the pot.

Amanda - posted on 11/12/2010 ( 21 moms have responded )

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I cannot get my son to go poop on the pot. No matter what I do he will not go. I've tried bribing him or taking him in the bathroom with dad or me and he won't go. He goes to go pee just fine but refuses to go poop. Anybody have this issue, any suggestions? We have a new baby coming right before he turns 3 at the end of Feb and would like him to be fully potty trained.

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Hi,
My son is 4 in December and has been potty-trained since April - only peeing. He will NOT poo on the toilet. I have tried bribery, coaxing, encouragement, showing him me doing it, telling him his friends do it, etc etc. I am now leaving it. I think the more I go on about it, the more he digs his heels in. I am pretty worried about it, as he is at nursery (I live in the UK) and is due to start school next year. BUT, it is a very very common issue and my advice is do nothing. Don't mention it, just clean up the poo without a word. Eventually I think - hope - he will realise himself and start doing it. My daughter is 2 in February and will probably potty-train next year, so hopefully if she does it, it will encourage him too. I think the stars thing is good too - it didn't work for me but every kid is different. Be as light-hearted as you can and eventually she'll do it, that's the advice I have been given by paediatricians, health visitors etc.
Keep us posted! Glad someone out there like me! XX
Suzy

Karen - posted on 11/24/2010

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Just potty trained my 2 1/2 year old twin grandsons in 3 days- two weeks ago. But only because I felt they were ready. Do not rush this process if they are not. With that being said, we had no overnight bed-wetting accidents and few during the day. As a mother of three adult children and a grandmother of several grandchildren what I've learned is this. At that age 1. They all seem to train much quicker and with less anxiety when they have a peer around (not always an option for some parents) 2. I DO NOT use pampers or pull ups once the training process begins (I feel they send mixed messages to their brains). 3. They aren't always aware of the sensation to urinate or defecate yet, nor are they aware that they have the muscle capability to control and release and 4. I offer unlimited fluids throughout the day and stop intake around 7P and make sure dinner is eaten by 6P to allow for digestion and deification before bedtime.



I start off by focusing their attention on learning what the sensation feels like when "its coming". I expect them to wet their cloth undies once or twice knowing most of them generally don't like the sensation of being wet or urine running down their leg. I watch for the next signs i.e. they might start to either physically hold their genitals or do the pee pee dance or even hide. Hyper focused on this behavior during potty training, I say calmly "is it coming"? They then start to connect what they are feeling with the idea they are peeing/pooping. I walk them to the potty, talk calmly about where pee/poop belong (in the potty), ask again "is it coming?



If they seem to be afraid to defecate (many are) I rub their back and/or tummy both for comfort and to stimulate a bowel movement and encourage them to push gently by making sounds and little faces they like to mimic. After they make it there successfully a few times they have all done the same thing. They start proclaiming loudly "Grandma its coming, its coming" "I gotta potty".



During this process I always acknowledge them for making it to the potty. Never scold them when they don't: Positive behavior reinforcement has worked for me every time. Got a question? Ask Johnson and Johnson http://askthejohnsons.FanBridge.com/fan_...

Oonagh - posted on 11/20/2010

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Like Kimberley my son is nearly 5, (April) and we are still struggling with pooing on the toilet/potty. He will pee no problem but seems to hold in the poo like he is afraid of the toilet. The only the thing I kind recommend is to try not to get frustrated because the more you do the more they do. good luck. xx

Kimberly - posted on 11/16/2010

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My daughter will be 5 at the end of this month of November 2010. She very recently started to poop on the potty more consistently. It was soooo frustrating that she would go some times on the potty and then most of the time want to do in pull-up.

I have tried everything, as I think her poops were very sticky/pasty. This probably made it more difficult for her to go.

I told her she could poop in a pull-up IF she sits on the potty. I think they find it hard to sit on potty to do this, as they are used to standing up and pooping. Also, I REALLY believe putting some Aloe Vera Juice in with her juice has REALLY REALLY helped her to go without pain and struggle. This was recommended by Dr. Oz on one of his shows for people who suffer from constipation.

Try some of these things. Don't worry, as my daughter took again very close to when she was 5. They all are different.

Laura - posted on 11/13/2010

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We just had Halloween, only give him candy when he goes poop on the potty!!

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21 Comments

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Michelle - posted on 11/25/2010

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Our son is nearly 4 and been toilet trained since going to Kindy at the age of 3. The Kindy teachers helped immensely and we are very grateful to them. He has never used the potty, just was not interested. Put him on the toilet on a small toilet seat which fits onto the main seat and off he went! Go figure!! Kids, little darlings.

Keri - posted on 11/24/2010

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my son is 3 going on 4 and still doesn't poop or pee on the pot all the time. We're working on it and have been "potty training" since he was about 2. He'll decide when he's ready, you'll just have to wait. I've heard kids have an easier time with peeing, but it takes some more "training" to realize when they need to go poop before it happens.

Bianca - posted on 11/24/2010

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i have the exact problem tried everything bribing etc...but my son is 3 going on 4...need help as well

Gina - posted on 11/24/2010

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My daughter is also 5 and does not poo on the toilet. She would soil herself a few times during the day but not actually do a large poo, she was diagnosed with Lazy Bowel Syndrome by a gastro paediatrician. At some point when she was younger she was constipated which enlarged her large bowel and because she has never been able to fully empty it she does not get the contraction feeling you get when you need to poo. When x-rayed she had a weeks worth of poo backed up, so she is now on a laxitive and an irritant to make the large bowel contract and to empty it out. So hopefully when it is empty she will feel the contraction needed to tell her to go to the toilet. Unfortunately she did regress for a few months when I had her brother but we are back to medicine and toilet time with a sticker reward chart that leads to a big prize for every 10 stickers she earns. We have our good days and our bad but we keep persisting because we know we will get there in the end. Good luck

SHORTIE(tina) - posted on 11/24/2010

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my son is 2months shy of being 5yrs old ! ! ! & is finally pooped trained,,,,,, they say some take longer than others, i also had to go to the dr, & his tetsions were 3x's the size they should B, so she put him on mylantix, 1/2 cap full twice a day to clean him out, & the more he pooped the more he decided to go on the POT ! ! ! ,, that wat helped my son to go on the pot,,,,,,,,,;o]

Amanda - posted on 11/24/2010

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Thank u everybody for your wonderful advise. I will definitely be trying these new techniques. I have back up and haven't been pushing him as much as I was. He does go in his room and hide when he needs to go boo boo. When I see him doing this I do encourage him to go to the bathroom, I get him in there and try to pull down his pants and he starts screaming so I do stop and tell him he should really boo boo on the pot but he says no. And runs out in goes to his room. I know he will do it in time just as he did going pee. Again, thank you ladies.

Felicia - posted on 11/22/2010

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I totally understand your issue. My daughter is 3 1/2 and still refuses to poop in the potty. She has her moments of agreeing to go pee, but she then says Im the baby and wants a diaper. I do not know what to do, because she got accepted to pre-school but they will not take her because I can not get her to potty train. It is hard to do, but I find she does better when I make her a chart, and she adds one star for peeing in the potty and two stars for pooping, and when she gets three stars she gets a goody. I have found this to be the most effective for her thus far, but it is a long process.

Yolanda - posted on 11/22/2010

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I had that same problem. My son is 2 1/2 now and he is finally going to the bathroom to pee and poop. At first he would only pee and would go and hide to poop on himself. We have another one due in 2 weeks so I just decided to make him wear his underwear all the time, no matter where we were going. I didn't want to have to keep cleaning up accidents, but I just didn't know what else to do. After the 3rd straight day of him wearing underwear everywhere he surprised me and said "Mama I have to boo boo" Ever since then he's been going and I couldn't be happier, because I refuse to be changing two diapers. Good Luck!

Sherry - posted on 11/20/2010

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Pooping is a very personal thing to a kid--if you notice a lot will hide when they do their business. It could be that he wants some privacy. Or maybe his bowel movements are large and it hurts. When he does eventually go...if it is in the toilet, make sure there is a step stool for his feet as kids need something to push against to bear down as they try to have their bowels move. My daughter figured out pooping on the pot on her own. We just always left the potty in her view in the bathroom. She was 3 in May and her little sister was born in July. I didn't want to pressure her to learn, cause I didn't want her to regress when her sister was born. Give them some space and no pressure or guilt and they will figure it out. Also, once he figures going on the pot is sometimes easier as it is a deeper bowl he may prefer that. Take faith in the fact that he will probably not start kindergarten in pull ups.

Lauren - posted on 11/18/2010

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I used small toys in order to get my son to poop on the potty. I put them in a basket and told him he could get one only if he pooped in the potty. We called them his "poo toys". It took a little while but it finally worked.

Amanda - posted on 11/18/2010

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Thank u everybody for your comments. I remember when I was trying to potty train him and he didn't want to go. After bothering him about it for a while I asked one day and he wanted to go. Now we're just having problems with the pooping. I suppose I will have to stop bothering him about going and hopefully he will decide to go on his own. Some times he will hold it but not for days only for a day. I will leave him alone and see if he will go on his own. Thank u again.

Emma - posted on 11/18/2010

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i have this problem my son will poop but only in his pants and nothing i do will get him to poop on the potty n i dunno what to do now so i just keep reminding him peein on the potty is great but doing a poop on the potty is fantastic

Monique - posted on 11/16/2010

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I have a daughter of 2 & 1/2 yrs and having tried everything possible and I mean every trick in the books, comments etc...i still cannot get her to pee or pooh or anything in potty or toilet i'm fed up, i really need help been suffering for 6mths trying and trying and just no go....the new baby is almost here and so is januarie and still she doesn't wanna part with her nappies

Sarah - posted on 11/16/2010

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my son is 3 and 3 months he has been wee dry since 2 1/2 but have had horrendous problems with poop. he would withhold it for days/weeks had to use dr prescribed laxatives to get him to go. as kimberleys daughter his poo is very sticky pasty makin it difficult for him too push out. you are probably much more frustrated and worried about this than your child. its very very common try not to worry they will do it in their own time when they are ready i understand the need to be fully toilet trained due to the new baby but honestly the more you try to push the issue the more stressed you and your child will become try to keep it light hearted. my son had a break through with reward stickers from nursery ? and we have used the opportunity to say bye bye to nappies at night also as we explained he is now our very clever big boy and the baby will be wearing nappies.

Analyn - posted on 11/14/2010

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i am in the same boat tryign to get my son to go poop he will pee but not the other thing. the heath nurse told me not to bribe him to much because you can turn him from wanting to go just let him go when he wants to go. she said in a couple of month try again and drop it don't keep at him. because see i got him a toy and told him he can have it if he gose but he never do but asked for the toy. but i leave him alone know and last night he sat on the pottie but didn't go but tried all buy his self so i still don't mention anythign to him abotu going poop only reminds him of going pee as he is good for doing that.

Amanda - posted on 11/13/2010

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I know I've tried that already. Thank u. That's kinda how I got him to go pee. lol

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