Do I have to potty train?

Nicole - posted on 04/20/2010

I agree with you! My son will be 3 next month and has shown little interest in the potty. I bought him his very own potty when he turned 2 but he sits on it with his diaper on and refuses to take it off. He has used the potty maybe 3 times but refuses to wear big boy underwear and won't sit on the potty when I ask him to with his diaper off. So I'm letting him do it on his own time.

Audrey - posted on 04/20/2010

I've been at my wits' end with my daughter, who is will be 3-1/2 next month. I ask her on a regular basis if she needs to use the potty or the toilet and she will say no. If I catch her as she's about to go in her pull-ups I will grab her and put her on the potty or toilet. But she's smart and will wait until nobody is watching to do her business in her pull-ups, then announce "I've already done it". The funny thing is that even if she's put on the toilet kicking and screaming, she usually settles down and will pee or poop in the toilet if left alone for a short while. It's amazing to think that such a young kid is capable of being a hypocrite.

Samantha - posted on 04/15/2010

I just trained my daughter and it is a ton of work but I have seen an increase in her confidence, less tantrums and no more diaper rashes. She is two and a half. You can teach them without forcing and manipulating them. No one wants to be in diapers, especially with the summer coming. I imagine it's very hot.

Pam - posted on 04/14/2010

To Kim, just to let you know, Head Start doesn't require your child to be potty trained, and they'll work with you on it if you want them to. At least, that's how it's supposed to work (I used to teach there). I know some centers make a bigger deal out of it than others.

Kathryn - posted on 04/14/2010

thats all ive been doing so far. once and a while when particularly ambitious or not busy that day we focus on it a little more and my daughter (2) will sit on it for a while after breakfast and see what happens. My grandmother raised 9 children, all potty trained haha, said she will do it when shes ready and they all do it at their own pace and encouraged me not to make a big deal of it.

Kim - posted on 04/14/2010

I feel this way, it's better then putting them on the potty and listening to them scream their heads off! My three year old son still wears pull ups, he used the potty a few times a day for about a week but then lost interest in it. I'm now having to move him along a little though because I would like for him to go to head start this coming fall, and want him to be potty trained by then. But other then that i don't feel the need to push him into potty training, he will come around to it in his own time.

Pam - posted on 04/13/2010

I worry about this as well, but I try not to. My son is 3, and he's pretty much done everything at his own pace. Anything more than gentle encouragement has been counter-productive with him. Right now, he's resisting the potty. I ask every day, and encourage him to try it and to join me when I go to the bathroom, but he wants nothing to do with it. For now, I've chosen to leave it at that. I taught preschool for a while, and I saw the effects of trying to force children to potty train. When it gets to the point of being a battle, I think it just causes trouble and delays the process more than if you were to just leave it alone. Not to mention, my son is diabetic, so peeing is a bit variable for him depending on his blood sugar; some days he fills diaper after diaper, and some days he hardly goes at all. It makes it hard to regularly remind him about going or to know when he'll probably need to go, because he may need to go a lot more or a lot less often depending on the day. I just keep telling myself, how many 14-year-olds do you see in diapers? I totally agree with you about not forcing it, and I don't think you're lazy at all.

Heather - posted on 04/13/2010

Thanks for this! I have twins that are two, and the idea of potty training scares me! We have two potty chairs in the living room, and on occasion they ask to sit on them, but only one of them has ever went in the potty. She went like three times in the same day, but then I had to go to the store and she said that she had to go while we were there, and I think the big potty scared her... She hasn't done it since :( But they are comfortable sitting on their potty chairs, they just don't pee in them yet...

Kimberly - posted on 04/13/2010

My daughter is 4 (as of 11/29/09). She goes pee on the potty pretty good (when she doesn't have a pull-up on). BUT when it comes to pooping, she says she wants to poop in a pull-up forever. I get so frustrated. I even took a few months off from trying to train her in the poop area. I just started back (April), and it is still not going well. I am at my wits end!!!! I don't know what else to do or say. Ironically, she has pooped on the big & little potties before. I have incented her with our redoing her room if she starts going poop on the potty more. She seems excited but still very scared. It seems that all of her classmates from Tiny Tots Pre-school 3s program are now trained in pee & poop. I try not to be a shamed by my daughter's delay. I hope that she will be poop trained in time for her to start Tiny Tots Pre-school 4s program in Fall 2010. Fortunately, she will have one of the same teachers. Can anyone help me or ease my anxiety? On a good note, she can blow her nose before some of her older cousins.

Teresa (Tess) - posted on 04/11/2010

My oldest son was 18months and fully trained however my second son has only just come out of his night time nappy at 2 & a half years. I agree that you shouldn't push too hard because your child would probably resist but I think some encouragement is needed, if there is no incentive then you may end up with kids who are school age and not wanting to use the toilet or potty because it's easier to have nappies (diapers)

Joanne - posted on 04/11/2010

Absolutely I agree, and if you're lucky that they can be home and not day care, then it's ok. I potty trained my oldest son at 18 Months...only took a weekend...he was ready and asking. My second son was almost 3 yrs old. He wasn't ready any earlier, but he was also a bit ill as a youngster. I think if you're waiting until they are like 4 almost 5 then maybe there is a bit laziness.

Kristin - posted on 04/11/2010

They will use the potty when they're ready. I totally agree with you. I did it with my son and he was totally trained by 3 years 2.5 months. It all goes so fast anyway. In the scope of your child's life, three or two or even four years is not that much...Enjoy!

Delwyn - posted on 04/11/2010

I potty trained my son at 21 months, because he was ready, other kids aren't until they are older. I do feel that kids who are getting on for 4yrs + and are still in nappies (other than for medical reasons) are well over due for learning to use the loo though. Sometimes a bit of gentle persausion is better than sitting back doing nothing. In the end I used the Gina Ford book, 'Potty Training in 1 Week' and it worked much to my surprise. He is still still in nappies at night, but that's normal at his age.

Hollie - posted on 04/10/2010

My daughter used her potty seat as a chair and then as a potty for her dolls before she actually potty trained. The ONLY reason I pushed her to fully train is that I could not afford to have two in diapers. I don't mind the dirty diapers either, but it is nice to have some extra money.

Kate - posted on 04/10/2010

its natural for them not to want to go my sons are almost 2 AND almost 3 and my almost 3 yr old is just now starting to potty train but my 2 yr old doesnt want to. u have to let them decide when they are ready. try potty treats a special little tubby of goodies if they use the potty they get one it worked wonders for my son that and his big boy underwear wearing them made potty training fun for him he felt liek a big boy!

Kristen - posted on 04/09/2010

Thanks ladies. It really helps alot to know that I am not alone :)

Raena - posted on 04/09/2010

i certinly feel this way kids are ready when they are ready my almost 3 yr old was ready when she was and potty traionig has turned out to be so easy. i think when you force them you end up having tons of accidents and horror stories but my daughter one day got up from bed dry and told me "moomy i dont want diapers no more, im a big girl !" so shes been diaper free for 3 weeks and not one accident not even at nite. hope this helps!

Marcy - posted on 04/09/2010

Yup, I sure do except my son needed to be trained to move from the nursery to preschool at his school and so that kind of pushed it along. We never pushed him though. I just kind of put the potty seat out where he could see it, put him in some undies and told him he should just check it out when he was ready. We then moved on to a reward system and one day he just kind of took to it. It took 8 months of non commited training. He still wears pull ups at night. Who cares if people call you lazy or unmotivated. I've been called worse because my son still comfort nurses....oh, the horror! HAHA.