how do i get my son to poop on the potty he pee's but does not poop?

Crystal - posted on 01/24/2009

I have one for you. My 3 year old only poops when we are out in public, ie. mall, shopping or restaurant. We can only get him to go if we catch him midway through the first push if we are at home or someone else's house. I tried the big boy pants and he just went in them. I'll try the cheerio trick and see if that works, I'm just amused and confused at the fact that he'll go when we're out but not in the comfort of home.

Nubia - posted on 01/24/2009

I have the same problem...my son turned 3 in December and I tried to potty train him before his birthday...mostly because he wanted to go to preschool with his sister who is 4.

So I tried and tried...succceded halfway, he will go pee in the toilet..by standing or seating on a seat....but he refuses to go poop. He hides and poops in his pull up or underwear. And its to the point where it stinks...like adult poop!

I tried everything....from stickers, chocolate (m&m's),posters, books, videos, punishment (time outs), taking away toys...I don't know what else to try.

I talked to the preschool teacher and she said she would allow him in the class because he would go with me to drop of my daughter everyday and always wanted to stay. So he started going to school with his sister...he did really good he would go when everyone else went and even tell the teacher he had to go...then all the sudden he stopped...he even pooped in his underwear that day. I was so upset....he was doing so well. So the next day we didn't let him go to school and are starting over with him!



Any help or advise will be greatly appreciated...I don't know what else to do!

Mellanie - posted on 01/24/2009

My oldest had it in his mind that you do not go pee potty till you are 3 and poop before you are 4. Don't you know the little bugger went pee potty 3 weeks before he turned 3 and poop potty about 2 weeks before he turned 4. It is my 3 year old I am having trouble with. He will not even sit on the potty. We tried the reward system and he just shows not intrest.

Leonie - posted on 01/23/2009

To everyone who is also experiencing this problem I am sorry to say that there is no "trick". Your child will get it when he/she is ready this often coincides with the latest trick. Pooing almost always takes a lot longer to master than peeing. Simply be patient. If the problem persists past 3.5- 4 years seek medical advice as there may be other issues.

Taunya - posted on 01/22/2009

What worked?

Taunya - posted on 01/22/2009

Ok, think what you may about this response but I have a very stubborn 3 yr old who, since he turned two last November, has been putting his pp in the potty. Now for his #2, well lets just say we haven't been so lucky. My 5 year old trained in one day flat and my 10 yr old took only a couple days. Now I did the same thing with both my boys and have wondered why Ryan did so well and why Nate (3) is not doing so well. Personality, stubborness, strong will, power struggle, etc. Nonetheless, I have tried everything under the sun and nothing has worked. I have done everything positive from sticker charts to m&m's, to trips to Wal-Mart. You name it I tried it. After receiving some wise council from a trusted friend, I am now giving him a cold shower (just cold enough to be uncomfortable) and putting him on his bed (clothed) for 30 - 45 min. with no toys, favorite blanket, NOTHING. Now, it has been 4 weeks. It has gotten better and he has been successful more times than not. So I will continue to do this until we are putting it in the potty every time. Now, this is not abuse, I tell him how much I love him afterwards, I don't do out of anger, he knows and will tell me exactly what will happen if he has an accident in his pants. As a matter of fact, the boy often laughs while I am drying him off. Go figure. He is my challenge and I love him with all my heart. Hope this helps.

Angela - posted on 01/22/2009

Ugg! I hate this potty training process! Ella won't tell us at all that she needs to go and if the TV is on, forget it! She will pee on the potty but she won't poop and then she gets really upset when she poops in her panties! I need ideas on how to make her feel more comfortable on the potty. I think I will try a few of the ideas here and let you know what works and what doesn't.

Ann - posted on 01/21/2009

i have to ask- what was the thing that worked for you in the end?

Shawna - posted on 01/21/2009

OMG...my son is going to be four and STILL waits until he has his pull-up on at naptime and bedtime to poop....He has gone a few times on the potty and think he is getting better about it (it took at least 6 months of pooping in big boy undies!), but he just seems to prefer to stand up!!! If I reward him, he is constantly asking for a "prize".... I have decided that he can't do it forever, right????

Andrea - posted on 01/21/2009

1 to 1 1/2 tsp of Milk of Magnesia will do the trick! I was told by my friends' pediatrition to do this and I tried it with my son who went through the same thing and it worked! Best thing ever!

Amber - posted on 01/20/2009

My son has the same problem. I have tried EVERYTHING and have had no luck. Mine will hold his poo for days and gets a tummy ache and start farting and poo will come out but when i stick him on the toilet he still wont go! I finally called his doctor because I was very concerned.

She told me that one of the philosophies on pooping is that children might feel as though it (the poop) is a part of their bodies and that by pooping they are afraid they are loosing a part of their bodies. It kind of makes sense to me, especially when seeing the look of fear on his face when he finally does go poo. He has been in underwear for a few months and pees just fine.

His pediatrician suggested that we give him prune and pear juice everyday, just to get him to go poo at all, and put him in a pull-up for a little while everyday so that he can start going on a regular basis again. After he is going regularly, and it stops hurting him to go, then start putting him on the toilet to poop, but fully dressed with his pull-up on. Just let him poo like that, and reward him for that. After he does that a few times then have him keep his pull-up on but put his pants down a little, and then reward again. then start having him loosen the pull-up and take the pants all the way down. It goes on until he is in underwear, with them down of course, and pooing on the potty like a big boy.

She said that his process could take a few weeks or a couple months, depending on him. I love the ideas behind it, because it seems as though he really likes the idea of not having mommy and daddy keep pushing him into doing something that scares him. We are still in the first stage right now, and it is starting to seem a bit better. He actually poo'd in the toilet a little tiny bit yesterday, all on his own!

One more thing, his pediatrician said that he should be rewarded for every single try, no matter how small. I am going to have to go to a dollar store soon and get a bicket of cheap-o toys for him!

Good luck to all you other mommys!

Amanda - posted on 01/20/2009

i have a almost 4 who pees but deosnt poop he says it deosnt come out he trys no success. ive tried potty chart with stickers once he hit the end he go a super special treat of his choice, tried potty box full of toys froma aloony store worked for peeing deosnt work anymore. looking at all the tips fpr help, hope these help someone

CHRISTIE - posted on 01/19/2009

My 3 year old daughter will only poop for my mother-in-law. What's that all about??

Christina - posted on 01/19/2009

I love the splash story!!!  We are finally having sucess, but the sleep schedule is off due to many trips to the potty at night and my son's anxiety about pooping.  He was telling me it hurt when he held it for 2-3 days.  Now he smiles when he finishes.  I give him 2 m&ms for pooping and it's working for now!  Good luck to everyone...I think time, encouragement and consistancy were the keys for us and may be for many others.

Kim - posted on 01/18/2009

This is going to sound sick, but for some reason it worked for my son. At least when he's in the right mood, that is. I put water in the sink, and gave him a small ball, and we made the water splash for a while, then I asked him if he wanted to make poop slash! I put him on the toilet and he did it! Now it will get you into trouble cause whereever he goes, he's laughfing histireclty saying "Poop goes SPLASH!!"

Kathleen - posted on 01/18/2009

i am glad to hear i am not the only one that has this problem.. my son in 4 and will not go poop in the potty... he had been to a ped gastroenterologist and he siad this is common for children esp boy sto hold back and refuse to go... my son has hel it foe over a week and would not go (unless he had on a pullup) my advise was to change his diet to all high fiber foods, cut way back on the milk, and cheese also to give him a capfull of miralx in his juice every day(this softens the poop) and have him sit on the potty everyday after breakfast and dinner for 15min,......

i will sxay we did it all and he still held it i ended up giving him childrens fleet laxitive pills once a week just to get him to go witch made him go because he could just not hold it in, he would sit on the potty and hold it in even with telling me his belly hurt, and that the poop was comin gout he would hold it in until his timer would go off and them get off...i am still going through this and waiting for his next appt to speak with the docter so if any one does have andy other advise i am open to suggestion also..

he now hates to even go in there we just sit and cry while having to go in

i even dread that time of the day..

ps i have tried making the potty so fun from bubble, stories even playing a movie...

help!!!!!!

Alicia - posted on 01/17/2009

WOW i guess i will have to try the cheerio trick because my 2.5 yr old wont poop either! He pees in the big and little potty just FINE! BUT he acts like it hurts (i think he's holding it in) when i try to get him to poo! Thanks for the great ideas ladies!!

Sahar - posted on 01/17/2009

YAY!!! Mine has done it for a week now. We just took her to Chuck E Cheese with her buddy from day care as her reward :)

Laura - posted on 01/17/2009

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You. i tried it. & It WORKED>!!!! he finially poops in the potty it's been 2days now!!!! thank you, thank you, thank you.

Tamarin - posted on 01/14/2009

My daughter who is 3 was doing good with peeing but wouldnt poop, then one day she was doing the "i have to poop" look, so i grabbed her and sat her on the potty (she wasnt very happy with me) but i sat in the bathroom with her and told her if she went she could have a treat and we could call grandma and tell her the good news...and she went! Yesterday she even pooped in the big toliet!

Christina - posted on 01/14/2009

ok..my 2.5 year old boy is not pooping on the potty either. He has been peeing on the potty for 3 weeks. He will hold poop up to 3 days. Then, at night, he won't go to bed until he poops. He usually has an accident on the way and will help me clean it. He then proceeds to continue trying for hours into the night. He won't be asleep until 930 or 10! I'm a single parent with a 6 month old as well and don't know what to do. He is in underwear exclusively.

Chelsey Reis Skerrett - posted on 01/13/2009

please keep coming with the ideas I have to sign up for prek and they have to be trained.He knows how just fights me with that and many other things like food..eats 3 things thats it.waffles ellios or regular pizza yogurt and mcdonalds nuggets n fries nothing else!!

Chelsey Reis Skerrett - posted on 01/13/2009

Ok Ill try it..I feel like nothings gonna work..but Ill try

Kellie - posted on 01/13/2009

First of all when he doesn't poop on the potty get him involved in the clean up.  This way he understands why you want him to go so bad.  Even if he poops in a diaper or pull up, have him help put it in the potty.  Second of all try withholding something he really likes.  For my son we're doing movies.  He didn't poop at all yesterday so this morning I told him no movies until he made yuckies in the potty.  If that means I can't turn the TV on all night then I'm prepared to do it.  He loves his movies.  He's at daycare today so if he goes in his pants there he won't be able to watch TV tonight.

Patience - posted on 01/12/2009

My sons it the exact opposite.....

I can't get him to pee on the potty.

Laura - posted on 01/12/2009

Thank u everyone for some ideas. I'm going to try the "cheerios" idea. i think he might like the idea too. wish me luck guys!!

Sahar - posted on 01/12/2009

I was actually having the same issue with my 3 year old. She loves to pee in the potty, but refused to poop...strong willed as well. She would literally hold it for a day or 2. We were so worried that she would mess herself up with the constipation that we gave in with the pull ups. Last week we stood our ground and said no more diapers to poop. She went on holding it for 2 days and would either go in a diaper at day care or before we got her out of bed in the morning (since she's wearing the pull ups at night).

We've been just reading her warning signs and as soon as we know she can't hold it much longer we just put her on the potty. We got a fight the first 2 times, but as soon as she goes she is so proud. Just today she told me on the way home "when we get home i'm going to poop in the potty" and she did just that. Phew...i hope this was the light bulb that just came on with the pooping.

Chelsey Reis Skerrett - posted on 01/12/2009

Oh he pees on there since hes 11/2 but only for me or his sis..noone else and all his friends do it at daycare Im so worried

Chelsey Reis Skerrett - posted on 01/12/2009

my son bryce who was early with everything walked at 81?2 months he writes letters puts 40 piece puzzles together..point made he wont poop on the potty no matter what! Im worried hes very strongwilled help!!

Sabine - posted on 01/12/2009

geeze, i thought i was the only one, my 2 1/2 year old does exactly the same thing, she will pee on the potty but not poop. She will hold on to it for days at a time and then when she cant hold on any longer she screams and says it hurts. i took her to the doctors and got some parachoc from the chemist, but it doesnt really help when she holds on to it for days.

Sara - posted on 01/12/2009

my daughter went poop 2 time's and havent done it again she will anly go pee

Jeannine - posted on 01/12/2009

My daughter started the moment after we watched Elmo goes potty DVD. She peed that very same day in the potty. Maybe if you can find something that she likes that shows peeing in the potty, she will do it. Now if I could only convince my daughter to poop... :) Good luck!

Alicia - posted on 01/12/2009

My daughter is three-years-old and she poops on the potty but will not pee!! Go figure, I do not understand why but one day that I can think of, she pooped in her diaper and it stunk soooooo bad that I told her she had the choice to go on the potty and she chose to go in her diaper so I let her sit in it about a minute or two cause it really stunk and ever since then she has been pooping on the potty. As far as peeing, forget it, I tried everything. My two boys were completely potty-trained at two and they were so easy (I did it not my husband), I showed them to stand and put cheerios in the toilet and they loved peeing and pooping on them, it amused them. My daughter has a completely different attitude about potty training.

Jeannine - posted on 01/12/2009

Im curious to see answers on this post. My 2 1/2 year old is doing awesome at potty training when it comes to peeing, too. But, like yours she wont poop. Today I thought she was trying to get it to come out & she kept saying it hurt ( I was rubbing her back and having her drink juice, reading to her etc. to keep her distracted), when in actuality she was fighting to keep it in! As soon as I put a pull-up on her she went with no issues. Ive tried the chocolate thing- she gets one m&m for pee & two if she poops & she knows that, but doesnt seem to want to. Ive tried the "big" potty & her potty chair to no avail. Help me too!!!

Susan - posted on 01/12/2009

They people at my son's daycare give the children chocolate when they poop..they say the kids run to earn their peice of chocolate.