Key to potty training boys?

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Vered - posted on 03/25/2009

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Quoting Tiffany:

Key to potty training boys?



1. Awareness - Is he really ready?  The time to start is when you offer and he says, "Okay?" or your kid's equivalent.



2.  Patience- every kid has their own potty weirdness.  Some only want o go sitting down, some want privacy immediately, even thought they haven't yet learned to aim or wipe.  Mine HAD to go on the big  toilet, refused to use a little potty.  It made potty time really tough to time properly, but going with the flow made him want to do it.  The first time he peed in the potty, it was on the BIG potty!  He was so proud that it really kept him interested



3. Bribery - My kid isn't really food motivated yet, but we only give chocolate rarely.  So, first, I offered him one 'treat' for peeing in the potty, but I made it a chocolate chip.  It took a little while to get this message through, then he'd make sure to potty once a day.  Then it got more frequent, and I varied the 'treat' (a Skittle, tootsie roll, etc.) so that he wasn't getting more than 2 chips a day.  When he got to peeing in the potty, we sang and danced each time and I gave him a treat, weaning him off of chocolate treats entirely.  Then...December came, and a relative gave us a big bag of chocolate coins.  I told him he could have one as soon as he pooped on the potty.  He started trying that very night.  It took him a while to figure it out, and we had to graduate to a better tasting chocolate, but we were able to keep it up without overdosing him on chocolate until he had the hang of pooping.  The nice thing is that he got sick of chocolate on his own, and now, just 3 months later, he poops on his own without asking for or receiving any reward.  He doesn't even announce it, just poops and moves on...which would be great if he'd mastered wiping....



4. Routine and Comfort - My son hated being dirty, but he was just scared of the whole concept.  He REALLY didn't want to have an accident, but he was so comfortable peeing in a diaper that he'd just go before he realized it.  I offered him the option of 'naked time' and supervised him constantly.  When I thought he had to go, I'd say, "Potty time!" and sit him on the potty.  If he went, cheering, happy dance, treat.  If he didn't, praise for trying, encouragement for next time (perhaps mentioning the treat he's get) and happily moving to the next activity (usually on easy-clean floors if I thought he really needed to go).  When he eventually had the inevitable accident, I called out, "Potty time", ran him to the bathroom and went through the same motions.  He got the the point where he'd yell, "Potty TIme" and we'd both go running.   We kept it positive and laughed a lot.  Enforcing the routine, getting him to sit when he didn't want to, was hard to keep upbeat, but his mood always changed as soon as he began urinating.



So, he got a little too used to being naked for a while, but now he's potty trained (about one accident a week to most, stays dry all night every night).  We go before and after we leave the house, before bed and after waking, and...it's taken a little longer than other kids, but he hasn't regressed like other kids, who often have 'good' and 'bad' weeks. 



All kids are different.  I took a LOT of advice from other moms when I cludged this program together.  I hope something in this will be helpful to you, too!

Tashe - posted on 07/15/2009

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My son is 2 years old, he will be three in November. I started right after his 2nd birthday. We started with the pull-ups and then the training underwear. It's a very tedious process and you have to be willing to stick with it or you may confuse the child. Once you take the diapers away, don't go back. Start off by sitting the child on the toilet often to get them used to it, then make it fun to use the potty for them every time. Increase the potty time gradually and mainly after they have drank liquids.During the night, stop the liquids at a certain time each night, preferably an hour to two hours before bedtime depending on how much liquid you child drinks. This helped me, I hope it helps you.

[deleted account]

Quoting Jac:

I'm stuck I have 4 kids 2 who were really easy to toilet train but my 3 and a half year old well different story there, he will go to the toilet for the first day no problems but after that he refuses to go and with school getting closer Im terrified he'll have to start late. I have tried everything bribery to puttin thingds in the toilet for him to aim at he just stands or sits there an screams and he refuses to sit on a potty. Has anyone got any ideas?


I was having a hard time just like you, I had tried EVERYTHING! ...And that was teh problem.  We had tried so many things, for a week or two, or even a month, that he was confused and really getting angry with us about the whole thing.  We took a week to regroup.  STOP.  Make it a matter of him making his own choice.  "Son, you may wear big boy underwear and go in the potty, or you can be all wet and stinky, what do you wnat to do?"  It worked like magic.  Once we slowed down and let him feel like he was tho one making the choices, we were trained in a snap!  Let him choose the underwear he wants, let him put them on himself, tell him it is up to him.  When they feel that they are in control it goes so much easier.  Good luck!

Kerry - posted on 03/30/2009

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My 2 1/2 yr old decided 6 days ago that he didn't want to wear a nappy anymore he wanted his pants (We had shown them to him on occasion to try and convince him) anyway we have gone all 6 days with no accidents at all but it is all down to us asking reguarly if he wants to go, he is not actually asking - it's been quite easy but i wonder at this stage if he'll ever ask?!?! Do i stop and let him have an accident so he can realise it's not nice to feel wet......but maybe he won't care and then it'll backfire! Maybe he'll just catch on in a bit...................i hope. Still i'm really proud of him 6 days is amazing i think.

Rebekah - posted on 03/30/2009

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The key to my sons potty training was to remove the pull-ups or diapers and put him in underwear. The day he turned 2 we told him he was a big boy and put him in underwear. Three weeks later, he never has a poop accident and only has a pee accident occasionally (when he's too busy and I forget to remind him). Why do you think our parents and grandparents potty trained kids at age 2? Could it be that they didn't have pull-ups?

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Tuesday - posted on 07/23/2009

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my son is almost 2 and a half. I tried to potty train him once. He would get on the toilet, big or small. It didnt matter to him . and i would tell him to potty but he would just push. So after a couple of days, I gave up. I didnt think he was ready. Well on the 4th of july my nieces and nephews was over and i helped one of them go to the batheroom and he wanted to get on the toilet too and try. Was it a bad idea not to let him do that? Well now, he is telling me that hes poopie. Im not to sure when he's ready or how to know that he's ready. But i have 2 kids in diapers and im so ready for him to be out of them...What are the signs and how will i know for sure?..........I was also told by his pediatrician that boys take a year longer to potty train than girls...so is this all okay?

Alisha - posted on 07/22/2009

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I have read most of ur posts and I have a ques. My son is 2 1/2 and one week he will go everytime I ask and have no accidents and then the next 3-4 wks it is like he has never seen a potty, we have to go back to diapers and all cuz he will go in his big boy undies and it not phase him at all. So WHAT do I do???? Any advice?

Marisa - posted on 07/20/2009

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ok my son is 2 and a half and does not like using the potty. i have him sit on it and most of the time he will go. but if i ask he tells me he doesnt need to use the potty. help

Naj - posted on 07/18/2009

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I forgot to mention that my son started walking when he was 15 months old ( late like my dad ) and sleeping in his room the same day I purchased his full size bed 16months old when this happened I just figured it would be easy I mean he stared walkin late but he hasn't sat down since he catches on fast I guess not for everything Anyway thanks again

Naj - posted on 07/18/2009

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Okay I've been reading and I just want to thank all of you I wasn't sure if my 19 month old was ready to go and I thought I was rushing him and now I know I really am pushing it and all kids are really truly different my daughter was out of diapers by 18 months but my son won't be out of them anytime soon he takes his diaper off he even wipes his diaper with toilet paper after he goes in it but he will not sit down on the potty but he will turn it over and press the button on the bottom of it to hear the song play I have been so bothered by this but now I can calm down His dad said I was rushing him and he was correct THANK YOU LADIES

Wendy - posted on 07/16/2009

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I have heard from 2 other mothers I know that have boys that letting them go without underwear helped them recognize the feeling of being diaperless thus resulting in no accidents. (It didnt work for either of my girls... I tried it!) Good luck and hang in there!

Sharon - posted on 07/16/2009

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my son is 2, will be 3 in November but he just has no interest in using the potty or toilet. He seems a little behind and i put it down to the fact that he was a prem baby. Am now getting worried that he will be 3 using pampers at nursery..

Erin - posted on 07/15/2009

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Quoting Tiffany:



I wonder if he is ready..I mean how do you really know?  I believe I am feeling the pressure from him turning 2 soon and the fact that he should be out of pull ups and fully trained (so others tell me).  I am a first time mom and I do not want to make potty time frightening to him but how do you really know when a child is ready?  If I ask my son to remove his diaper for the bath tub and he rushes to do so then places it in the trash. However when I say lets go to the potty I have to remove the diaper and he just sits and pulls at the tissue. 






I felt a lot of pressure to train my son by age 2 as well, but he regressed when he was 22 months old and I had my second son, and still refuses to use the potty.  He turned 3 in May.  However, my Aunt had 6 boys and when she heard I was trying to potty train him at that age she told me not to bother, that only one of her 6 sons potty trained before they were 3.  Now I don't feel that pressure, because I have heard from several mothers that their boys didn't potty train until they were 3 or older.  If he doesn't seem interested, don't push the issue.  What I tried before I had my second son was to set up a reward sticker system, and actually taped a piece of paper on the wall and every time he went in the potty he would get a sticker,  and an extra if he went tee-tee and poo.  He loved showing anybody that came over all of his stickers. He thrived on that system until his little brother was in the picture...  Maybe he just needs motivation or is just confused as to what he is supposed to do on the potty...  good luck!

Liz - posted on 07/15/2009

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My little boy is 25 months and has recently started to be obsessed with the potty. I'm keeping it up to him at the moment and keeping him in Pull-ups as when I tried a while back with asking him if he wanted to go for a wee he just told me to stop talking about potties. Most days we are doing several wees on the potty and he is quite dry. Just waiting for the summer hols now to go completely with it and get him into pants.

With regards to treats my little boy is fascinated with toilets and wee and poo (typical boy I guess) so his treat is that he can look at the wee and flush the toilet. I've told him that if he poos on the potty I'll let him look at that too but no success yet.

Melissa - posted on 07/14/2009

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Hello! my name is Melissa, I have a 3year old boy who I m trying to potty train and I m kinda stressing over it I tried him on the potty for the first time at the age of 2years old so it's been a year he has pooped and peed on the potty many of times but when he is in his pull-up's he pee's then says to me I peed. I tryed him in boxer's and said" BIG BOY'S WEAR BOXER'S AND BIG BOY'S NEED TO TELL MOMMY THEY NEED TO PEE SO U TELL MOMMY WHEN U NEED TO GO". But he well stand there and just start peeing and i bring him to the bathroom right away to see if he needs to pee anymore.
And with the pooping he will sometime poop and then go in to his room or somewhere private and smear it.
what can I do to help my lil boy use the bathroom all the time. and stop being everywhere and smearing poop?????????
Any suggestion's would be absoulty GREAT!
If u would like to e-mail them to me cause I m not sure how to get back on this to find the place where this will go on here since I m new it is melissawarner@live.ca.

Thanks so much for taking the time to read and respond :D

Melissa

Becky - posted on 07/14/2009

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My son did the same thing. His first experience w/ the toilet was at 17 months. I quickly decided that was a fluke. Then after he turned 2 his interest returned. He did his thing on the toilet and even wore "big boy" underpants. He is almost 3 now and out of nowhere he tells me, "I want to wear diapers forever and ever." He will only go pee ont he toilet if he's naked b/c he knows he is not to pee on the furniture or the floor or the bed. At this point I'm just hanging in there waiting for him to decide he wants to be a "big boy".

Becky - posted on 07/14/2009

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I like the idea of "the store doesn't carry them anymore" but what do you do when you are at the store and he sees them? My son is extremely verbal and would shout out to the heavens that he's seen them and then accuse me of telling "stories"...

Dixie - posted on 07/14/2009

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im trying to potty train my son who is 2 1/2 and im not sure if he is quite ready i tryed putting him in underwear and then just watching him and he never knows that its potty time till he has already gone and its all over him anyone have some advice

Shelley - posted on 07/14/2009

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I used the 3 day method on my daughter and she was completely trained by 2 years. My 2 year old son on the other hand is no where near ready so i am waiting for summer to start trying him. They say boys take longer than girls to toilet train, and i am not stressing too much over it...it will come when he is ready.

Alicia - posted on 03/31/2009

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i was having the same problem and kinda still am, i went on you tube and looked up potty training there is a lot of helpfull things there. the one that helped us the most was once upon a potty my son loves it and after he watches it he will go potty no probs but we have to show it to him every day hope that helps

[deleted account]

I know a lot of moms don't feel that giving treats for potty time is a good idea, and I didn't agree with it at first either, but it doesn't need to be food, I give my son dino stickers, we keep a piece of construction paper and some stickers over the potty.  For pe he gets one sticker, for poo he gets two (and a song and dance).  He seems to really like that and I don't worry so much about his nutrition.  Also, I didn't agree with wasting food in the potty for him to pee on, so we used a corner of toilet paper and it works just as well.

Jennifer - posted on 03/31/2009

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WAIT!  and I almost forgot to mention its a urinal!  HA! sorry i dontn mean to litter this page with my posts!

Jennifer - posted on 03/31/2009

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WAIT!  and I almost forgot to mention its a urinal!  HA! sorry i dontn mean to litter this page with my posts!

Jac - posted on 03/29/2009

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I'm stuck I have 4 kids 2 who were really easy to toilet train but my 3 and a half year old well different story there, he will go to the toilet for the first day no problems but after that he refuses to go and with school getting closer Im terrified he'll have to start late. I have tried everything bribery to puttin thingds in the toilet for him to aim at he just stands or sits there an screams and he refuses to sit on a potty. Has anyone got any ideas?

Tiffany - posted on 03/29/2009

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I am definitely trying the treat thing..my son loves cookies, crackers and gum but honestly I do not feel he understands the concept of the potty yet..he fusses more than anything when on it or pulls all the tissue off the roll as he sits there.

Tiffany - posted on 03/29/2009

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Being a first time mother I feel there is a lot of pressure..I was pressured about the pacifier, walking, the bottle, the diaper, reading, talking and sleeping in his own bed..what happened to the days when people let children grow at their own rate??

Tiffany - posted on 03/29/2009

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Thank you everyone for the helpful information.  I will just take it one day at a time and stop setting a deadline for us..I do not want to make this process a scary one for him. 

Wendy - posted on 03/29/2009

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Quoting Alicia:



every ones seems to be giving there kids treats for doing good stuff i had not even thought of giving him a treat i dont know how i feel about it im not saying its wrong i just doint feel good about it  does any one else feel the same or is it just me :)






I think it is a good idea......whatever works!!!! I did it with my daughter. Gradually, as they start becoming better and more regular at going, you decrease the amount and frequency that you give the treats. Eventually, they go without needing a treat to entise them. I will definetly be using treats as an incentive with my son  when I start potty training him in the summer. Stickers and stamps can also work if your kids like that kind of stuff.



Keep in mind, I don't think people are giving HUGE amounts of any kind of treat  to their kids when they go on the potty.....sometimes 1 smartie for pees and 2 for poos is sufficent.

Alicia - posted on 03/29/2009

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every ones seems to be giving there kids treats for doing good stuff i had not even thought of giving him a treat i dont know how i feel about it im not saying its wrong i just doint feel good about it  does any one else feel the same or is it just me :)

Alicia - posted on 03/29/2009

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my son will poop in potty for his nappy one day he sat on the potty till i got there just to show me he had done ones and twos  and had a red ring on his bum it was so funny but he will not do a bloody thing for me  he hates it he was 16.5 months  at the time i was ready to stop buying nappies but he only does it for nanna   

[deleted account]

Potty training sucks! I'm having a heck of a time with my little boy, he'll be three in June. He goes almost religiously for the nanny, but for me... he just says, "I don't do that!" We have never pooped on the potty, only peed. Mind you, DJ loves his potty chair and won't tolerate being wet or stinky. He just is being stubborn for my husband and me, he will go for nanny and the grandmas.

Lorra - posted on 03/29/2009

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Just keep offering it too him. My son at 27mths was doing everything on the potty then one day decided he could not be bothered. He is now 36mths and we have been ok at staying dry during the day as of late but we still don't poo on the potty ( happened a coupe of times but nothing regular) and we don't stay dry overnight.



All you can do is keep offering it to him and wait for him to make the conscious decision. pull-ups.com has alot of helpful hints, videos and rewards for lil ones during potty training time.



I also read alot of potty books to him so he sees that other children go potty too.



Good Luck All!!!

Nicol - posted on 03/27/2009

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Well actually my son is going to be two mext month and he wants to take off his pampers and go to the bathroom, but when he gets there he does nothing. I try to time him every seven minutes but after the fourth of fifth attempt he just pees himself and says "mama I wet"



Have any suggestions

Alicia - posted on 03/26/2009

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you have just made me feel so much better ,



every one is telling me  that they had it done by two my son is 18months and has done ones and two in the pottey but not for me he hates it i want him to get it but i dont know how to do it with out pushing him so i will wait till he is ready  and just talk to him about it , i hope thats the rite thing to do . . . 

Lorra - posted on 03/26/2009

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I am interested in the 3 day method as well. Let me know how that works.



Tiffany, don't let anyone tell you when your child should be trained. I went through that with my ex-MIL and all it did was stress my son and I out. Everything in good time.



I was able to get my son to start sitting on the potty by placing it in the livingroom and we would sit on it and watch cartoons. After a couple times we went pee "accidentally" but then I was able to show him what a potty was for. When he poops in his diaper I take him to the toilet and put in in there so he knows that is where poop goes.



He now pees all the time (during the day) on the potty, we're hit and miss with the pooping but its a process.

Wendy - posted on 03/26/2009

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Quoting Brittaney:

My "stepson" is going to be 4 in May and he still doens't poop on the potty. It's annoying but getting upset does NOT help the situartion. Actually this weekend we are trying the "3 Day Potty Training" method (on Cafemom.com) and hopefully that will be the last of it. They highly suggest letting the child thrown away their own diapers/pullups so they really know they are gone. But the age thing should not bother you, your child has their own personality and cannot be compared to any other child. I agree with Wendy 100% on that. I'll keep you posted on the 3 Day.


Hi Brittaney. I would be very interested in hearing how successful the "3 Day Potty Training" method was for your son. I was looking into purchasing that when I start training my son in the summer.



Let me know if it works!!!!!! Thanks :)

Brittaney - posted on 03/26/2009

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My "stepson" is going to be 4 in May and he still doens't poop on the potty. It's annoying but getting upset does NOT help the situartion. Actually this weekend we are trying the "3 Day Potty Training" method (on Cafemom.com) and hopefully that will be the last of it. They highly suggest letting the child thrown away their own diapers/pullups so they really know they are gone. But the age thing should not bother you, your child has their own personality and cannot be compared to any other child. I agree with Wendy 100% on that. I'll keep you posted on the 3 Day.

Wendy - posted on 03/26/2009

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My son is going to be 3 in June and doesn't have the slightest interest in going on the toilet. This is my second child so I am less concerned about when he "should" be potty trained because they eventually decide on their own that they are ready. I am going to try to potty train him in the summer when I can let him run around outside in the backyard with just his underwear on (alot less laundry that way!!!). Don't ever let anyone make you feel that your child HAS to be potty trained at 2!!! Kids are all different. There is no right or wrong time. If you do it too early, when your child is not ready, you'll be in for a LONG journey!!! Good luck! :)

Crystal - posted on 03/26/2009

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he doesnt have to be potty trained by 2 everyone does it in there own time i would say as long as your still trying and working with him thats great but i wouldnt let anyone tell you that he HAS to be potty trained by 2 one of my good friends her son is 2 and still not potty trained she works with him on it but hes just not ready so dont force him he will come around in time

Tiffany - posted on 03/26/2009

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I wonder if he is ready..I mean how do you really know?  I believe I am feeling the pressure from him turning 2 soon and the fact that he should be out of pull ups and fully trained (so others tell me).  I am a first time mom and I do not want to make potty time frightening to him but how do you really know when a child is ready?  If I ask my son to remove his diaper for the bath tub and he rushes to do so then places it in the trash. However when I say lets go to the potty I have to remove the diaper and he just sits and pulls at the tissue. 

Lorra - posted on 03/26/2009

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I have ben working with my 3 1/2 yr old son for quite some time on potty training and although he knew how to do #1 and #2 on the potty, so long as he had a pull up on he had no issues going in the pull up. So one day I told him we were running out of pull ups and as soon as they were gone we would have to pee and poo on the potty cause the store doesnt sell pull ups anymore. We have been peeing on the potty since, and doing as well as can be expected with poo ( a few accidents)



We now only wear pull ups meant for bedtime or away from home time.

Crystal - posted on 03/26/2009

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well if your son is ready and enjoys games you can try putting a fruit loop in the toliet and having him aim at it and turn potty training into something fun that chances are will make you run out of fruit loops

Felicity - posted on 03/25/2009

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i'm also tryin to potty train my son and he is ready by the fact that he doesnt like to hve a nappy on once he has done his business in it but he cnt quite comprehend wat 2 do wen he needs to go

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