Please Help!

Crystal - posted on 03/31/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Ok, I have been following all of the posts of other moms struggling with potty training, but I am finding no new material. Please help me, someone!

My daughter has had issues with her bowels her whole life. She wavered between constipation and diarrhea. This was even as a newborn. When she was around 16 or 17 months, she started potty training by herself. She took the initiative and wanted to start and I just went with it. She was doing great! Just before 18 months, she had her first bowel movement on the potty and decided not to use it again. Since I was pregnant, I did not push the issue, aware that she may regress when I had my 2nd child, so, again, I let her take the lead. Around this time, she started waking, screaming through the night. She continued to have a bowel movement every day. Between birth and 2 years, she saw well over 1 dozen different doctors. Finally, at 2 years old, my new GP sent her for a stomach x-ray. She was severely constipated. When she had diarrhea, it was soft stool that was moving a round a mass of solid stool in her bowel. Since this time, she has been on a daily laxative, with supposatory given if she has not had a b/m within 72 hours. Two months before her 3rd birthday, she decided that she didn't want to wear a diaper any more. Two days later she stopped using one at night as well. She has rarely had an accident, day or night, since. She is now 3 years and almost 8 months. But, she still is not bowel trained. Here is everything that we have tried:

No diapers, diapers full time, pull ups to b/m in, diapers to b/m in, small rewards (candy, toys), big rewards (my little pony castle), ignoring soiling (changing her immediately, but without conversation or eye contact), sticker chart with a known goal, piggy bank with a known goal, borderline humiliation (she hates it when I call her stinky dinky doo), pleading, yelling, told to stay on the potty until she poops (3 hours....then again later in the day), praise, rewarding small steps, hugs and comfort, read stories to her, gave her books to look at herself, watching tv, treating her like a baby (naps again, refusing foods such as lollypops that her baby brother can't eat), singing to her, hugs while on the toilet, loss of privledges (you control your poop, I control the TV or toys....she even handed over a bear that she has slept with since she was 4 months old for this one!), cutting off and throwing away treasured underpants (explained that if she uses them like a diaper, I will take them off and throw them away like a diaper)....OMG...I am sure that there is more....

Some techniques (such as making her stay on the potty and calling her stinky dinky doo) I am not proud of. I am actually quite embarrassed to put them in type, but I am at a loss...I don't know what to do! Please, someone help me!

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Crystal - posted on 03/31/2011

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Oh...I should add, she has tried to poop on the floor, rather than go on the potty (this is what lead to the don't get off until you go thing). When on the potty, she screams, cries and kicks. She said that she is tired and wants to go to bed or that she is scared (this is a cry wolf thing. It is a phrase that she uses to get out of things, b/c it has worked to get her off of the potty in the past)...Help...

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