Too scared to poop on potty!

Kristie - posted on 01/06/2009 ( 13 moms have responded )

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We've been trying to potty train my almost 3 year old son for about 2 weeks now. He has the pee-peeing down pat but he will not poop on the potty. We know when he has to poop because he keeps telling us he has to pee and holds his bottom. When we get to the potty "no pee-pees in there." We explain to him he doesn't have to pee-he has to poop. He pooped one time on the potty and it scared him to death! We've tried holding him on the potty (crying hysterically). We tried bribing him, letting him use the big potty, the small potty, etc. Since then, he refuses to do it!!! Any suggestions????

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Kathleen - posted on 01/08/2009

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I am having all of the same problem with my 2 1/2 yr old son now and had them with my daughter who is now 4 back when she was training. Some suggestions I have heard are:



-let them poop in their pull-up/diaper but encourge them to at least go stand in the bathroom when they do it. This helps them associate the need to use the bathroom for BMs.



-let them sit on the potty wearing their diaper/pull-up



-actually cut a hole in the disposable diaper before you put it on them and then let them sit on the potty wearing it.



All these steps might lead them to being more comfortable with actually going to the potty for BMs.



However, as we all know at heart it is up to the child and will always happen with time. Let's just all try our best to let time play its part eventhough it will get very frusterating.



good luck!

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Kellie - posted on 01/12/2009

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Oh Tori, how frustrating.  2 years of not pooping on the potty.  It sounds like your son will be one of those kids that just all the sudden gets it one day.  I've heard about that leaking as a result of constipation.  I can't believe these boys manage to get constipated while on the Mirlax.  My son got constipated twice on it.  Good Luck, let us know how things turn out.

Tori - posted on 01/12/2009

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My son is 4 and we have been struggling with potty training for 2 years now. He pees in the potty just fine, but holds his poops in. We do use miralax daily, but he still manages to hold his poops in and then leaks non-stop. When he gets really constipated he contorts his whole body and tells me he's "making the poopies go back up inside". He complains of his bottom and his tummy hurting more days than not. We sit him on the potty several times a day, but he refuses to even try to push. We've tried both punishment and reward systems with no success. He has gone poop on the toilet 3 times in the last year, but refuses to repeat it. I will try some of the tips on here, but meanwhile don't know what to do about the leaking poop, as he refuses at this point to even push his poop into a pull-up!

Kellie - posted on 01/12/2009

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Mine pooped on the potty again last night.  That's two days in a row.  I'm so excited.  He started the whole back and forth thing after his nap so I told him we couldn't turn on his movie until he went yucky.  RIght away he said, "I have to go potty."  I sat him on and he instantly started pooping.  He was obviously holding it.  I think the combination of withholding something that they really want (the movie) and making them clean the mess has made a huge difference.

Christina - posted on 01/11/2009

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I am in the same position as some of you have talked about and glad to know I am not the only one going through it. I still wish I had a magic wand though. I also wish I thought that having Charlie "help me clean his mess" would work but I don't know... I guess I can try but will that more of a mess for me? ugh!!!!

Karen - posted on 01/11/2009

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The seat i got for my kids go on the toilet not the potty and it works for me my daughter was fully potty trained by the age of 2 and a half years old, my son is nearly 2 and hes also using the toilet with the seat on, and hes doing great



 

Kellie - posted on 01/11/2009

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Just wanted to update everyone on my son James.  He is also holding his yuckies.  Friday night I got home from work and found a poopy pair of underwear sent home by daycare.  I went into the bathroom with James and shut the door and told him he was going to help me clean the yuckies out of them.  He was absolutely disgusted and devestated.  He refused to even come near me and the undies.  Finally,  I got him to spray some cleaner on them and he also dropped them in the wash.  I think that the whole process really clicked something in his brain.  I will continue to make him help me clean the mess up.  Saturday morning right after breakfast he started the whole, I have to go potty.  We'd go in and he'd sit and cry and nothing.  This went on all morning.  At about 11am I made a warm bath and he started making yuckies in the tub and cried to get out.  I  set him on the potty and nothing.  Finally at 12pm he said he had to go potty.  I set him on the potty and he went.  I was so happy.  It was like he didn't want to go in his pants or the potty for 4 hrs.  Although it ended well, it was a long morning.  Throughout the entire morning I had also told him I wasn't going to start a movie until he went and also told him that we would go to the playground after he went.  We did go to the playground and it was nice to sit there and watch him play without having to worry about any accidents.  I'll keep you updated.  I hope our struggles with poo poo end soon.  Kellie

Liz - posted on 01/08/2009

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My son is 2 1/2, we started really training after he turned 2, but we got a potty a few months before that and put it in the bathroom. He would sit on it and usually pee while I was running the tub water. We started then because the first thing he would do when he got in the tub was stand up and pee, and a couple times he pooped inthe tub. After he turned 2, he also would hold in the poop and get constipated. I had to use suppositories a couple times to get him to go. After that he got better. The timing is what we are working on now, he feels the urge, but doesn't like to push it out. He will tell me he has to poop but we will go to the potty I swear 10 times before he will finally go. I feel like I spend whole evenings running back and forth to the potty! I don't want to say no and have him go in his pants. I have held him down on the potty a couple times when I knew he had to go but wouldn't push it out. Trying to push me away he pushed out the poop! A warm bath helps too. When I know he has to go and won't, putting him in the tub usually helps it along. We use a sticker chart for every time he goes on the potty, pee or poop, but when he poops on the potty he gets an extra treat as well like a sucker or some other small candy treat that he really likes. Lots of praise and encouragement every time he goes. It did seem to scare him at first when the poop came out, but cheering him on and letting him know it was good thing and it made mommy happy helped. I also read him books about pottying on the potty. He also really likes a movie about elmo and learning to go on the potty. Good luck! I can't wait to get out of the bathroom!

Kellie - posted on 01/08/2009

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We are all ready using those little seats that you put on the potty.  Thanks for trying to help though.  Anyone else have any suggestions.  I think I'm going to try having him go in the bathroom for a week to do it, then sit on the potty with undies or a pull up for a week, and then take the pull up off and see if it'll go.  The only thing hard about that is that my little guy is holding it so then he gets constipated.  Also if he does go he just goes in his undies and doesn't say anything.    I think I just need to be patient but it's hard to be patient when poop is involved.

Karen - posted on 01/08/2009

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Hi everyone, All i can say to this problam is try to get a childs toilet seat it just goes over your toilet and it makes the toilet hole smaller for small bottoms, i had one for my daughter and i'm using it for my son to they are really good. i hope this helps



 



 

Kellie - posted on 01/08/2009

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My son who will be three in April is having the same problem.  He is doing awesome with peeing but holds his poop.  He has become constipated twice in the last 2 weeks because he will not poop in the potty.  When he does poop it is usually in his pants.  He has gone on the potty 3 times so I don't understand why he won't keep doing it.   Even if we get him to sit he won't go.  He'll just hold it.  I started giving him Miralax once a day to prevent him from getting constipated and he still managed to hold it and get constipated.  What's with these boys not wanting to poop.  Please help us.

Katie - posted on 01/07/2009

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My daughter is doing the same thing.  She's got peeing on the potty down pat, but refuses to poop on it.  She will only poop in her pull-up.  She usually goes poop during nap time and I find her in her room changing herself (what a mess!!)  I've put her potty chair next to her bed to encourage her to go there, but to no avail.  I'm guessing she'll figure it out with age, but in the meantime, what a mess!!!!  I would also appreciate any ideas!

Rosann - posted on 01/06/2009

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I'm trying to train my son as well. But sometimes, what I try to do is keep asking him if he needs to go, when he says no & he does poop in his pull up or whatever, I'll let him sit in it for awhile. He'll tell me when he's ready to get changed, most of the time. When he doesn't & he wants something (like a snack or tv), then I'll tell him to get his wipes & pullup to be changed. Depending how badly he wants something will he move. As much as it stinks up the house, I feel that if I just change him, then he's going to feel like I'm going to be doing this forever, so what would be the sense of learning. The advise that I've been getting mostly has been, when he's ready he'll let you know.

Good Luck. I hope this will help you out, since it's not doing so good with me.

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