How do you get your teenage son to bring homework and do it instead of lying all the time and stating he doesn't have any homework.

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Natalie - posted on 04/25/2009

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Thanks for the advise, but my almost 13 yr. old son has a different situation in that he does not do good in social situations and I wonder, besides a focusing problem which we are getting checked by a doctor...I think he just doesn't care. He maybe depressed, he doesn't open up to us and never shows any affection. We have tried taking things away...that doesn't seem to work. I am worried about him! My husband even said to take away his vacation with the family down the Oregon coast this June, if he doesn't start putting his head in the game. I think that is too harsh! He will feel unloved.

Arelis - posted on 04/17/2009

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What always works for me when I've had issues with my sons and school is sticking to the punishment for not doing what needs to be done. I take away what they like best. For my teen son is his phone and computer. He will die without it. I really stick to the time depending on what the problem is. If you are consistent and show them that their actions are not going to be allowed they get the picture. Teens need to be held accountable for their actions. If he gets the phone taken away for a month, I make sure that we wait a month. Kids are smart and will pick up that you are slacking.

My son has always gotten good grades but he started becoming popular at school and decided to become a social butterfly, so his grades got really bad. Well, no phone and computer till the next grading period. Even though I kind of understood what happened and that kids will be kids, we did not give back the privilege until the new report card came in and the grades were good again.

Natalie - posted on 04/17/2009

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I wish I had a response. I'm in the same boat, Let me know if you find any ideas out that work. I can tell you to check his grades online for starters, get student ID # and go to the school dist. grade book login. It also shows assignments missing and scores.

Christian - posted on 03/21/2009

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email the teachers. ask them to let you know if homework isn't turned in. Let him know u are doing it & if he doesn't turn something in he will lose prvilages. (whatever he does, video games, sports, hanging out, afterschool job etc.) Every time he doesn't turn something in that's 24 hrs no__________. (you fill in the blank) You have to stick to this no matter what for it to work, I do not care if he has a school event he wants to go to in that 24hrs. the answer is no. It sounds harsh, but it worked. On who? Me, my Mom did this with me after finding out I spent 1/2 of 9th grade not turning in a single assignment. By the time I was in 10th grade I had learned the lesson (I ended up passing the 9th BTW) and never forgot a homework assignment for the rest of high school. We have the same rule here in our house (with my 9 & 10 yr olds). They do occasionaly forget, but it's a legitament forget now, instead of on purpose. But they still have to pay the same consiquense. Good Luck

[deleted account]

I've tried everything.  In the same boat here.  The child will sit down at the homework table for hours, do what appears to be homework, but when I check to see if it's been handed in...  ziltch.  It's beginning to threaten whether he passes this year or not.  And I have told him, without wavering, that we will not be doing summer school.  I will have him held back.  But where has all of this worry gotten me?  Exactly nowhere.  Oh well....  At least I'm not the only one.  It's absolutely maddening!

Buffy - posted on 02/01/2009

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I tell my kids that summer school is not an option & they will stay back in the same grade while their friends go on. It is their responsibilty to do so. If I don't go to work they don't have allowence for the weekend. I email teachers weekly & they tell me where they stand & if homework is not done 1 day they loose friday, if an something is not turned in on time they loose sat., & if chores are not done they loose the whole weekend. It sound like a long process but it only takes a week if you don't back down. My kids were the same way ounce they learned no chores, no school, no money, no life. They started showing responsibility.

Katie - posted on 01/26/2009

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Ya, they all try this one. We do have online homework hotlines too and having the kids sign and have parent/teacher signatures on the kids planners/agendas everyday is the key. My kids know if they arent getting A's and B's they are gonna have a monkey on their back!!! The mad momma monkey who isnt afraid to show up at school to get their homework for them before they get a chance to "forget it".  Consistancy is the rule... Dont let up checking the planner and his assignments. My daughters have their phones, tv time, computer taken away if they dont get a signature or a good grade. No goin' to the dance or whatever hang-out thing is cool if I dont get a signature and good grades. No good grades=no social life. Good luck!

Mary - posted on 01/22/2009

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relating too your question, but i have a 13yr old daughter...this is what we  and i mean we, are doing....teacher interview with daughter, emails from teacher about home work, homework notes,(reveiws, test, incomplete work...logged, etc), sitting down with our daughter daily with home work, 2hrs....hired a student tutor....$10hrs..cheep...so i don't pull my hair out....and many days of just praying, she will get it together, one day...this seems to look like work, but what preteen came with a manual........smile and say i love you.......

User - posted on 01/22/2009

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In my town, they have a homework hotline and a online site you can see if they are doing their work, its called skyward. My daughter has the same problem, I started going through her folder and backpack every night to make sure nothing was getting missed. In my home its more of an organizational problem. Hope this helps.

Tamra - posted on 01/16/2009

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I would like help with this too!!! I have an 11yr old who is having the same problem.  I don't know what to do and I am at my wits end with him.

Tamra - posted on 01/16/2009

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I would like help with this too!!! I have an 11yr old who is having the same problem.  I don't know what to do and I am at my wits end with him.

Amy - posted on 01/14/2009

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Does he have an agenda? I know my girls have agendas that have to be signed by the teacher and the parent to make sure everyone knows whats going on. Good Luck

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