Hygiene!!!!

Jennifer Lynn - posted on 08/26/2012

I am going through the same thing. But I came up with maybe and idea that might work for you in her clothes issue. Make her wash her own clothes. If she dont then she wont have anything clean. I am not sure of the outcome of this test yet but I will keep you posted if any change happens.

JJ - posted on 03/31/2012

wow it is a relief to know that I am not the only mom with a pre teen girl who does not care that she is stinky and her hair tangled.....argh!!!!!!!!

Heidi - posted on 04/20/2011

I have an almost 13 year old son and we've been going through this battle for years now. As a 6 or 7 year old, he refused to change his socks or his underwear. I found a stash of obviously clean underwear stuffed down between his bed and the wall and when asked about it he stated " The ones I had on weren't dirty". When his dad and I got divorced (we have joint custody) I would often pick him up after three or four days at his dad's and find him in the same clothes I dropped him off in. Now that he's older, he takes a shower in the mornings before school but on the weekends I have to tell him to. Glad to know its not just us! lol

Jeni - posted on 01/13/2011

I feel your pain, I have a 12 year old daughter who always "forgets" deoderant and to brush her teeth, does a half-hearted job of shampooing and scrubbing herself in the shower and would live in the same clothes everyday without washing them if I didn't peel them off of her and throw them in the wash. I'm very relieved that it isn't just me and that it seems to be the age. I have tried taking her to the store and letting her pick out her own preferred scents of shampoo and conditioner, deoderant, and lotions. She will seem pretty excited about it for a little while and then lose interest and be back to smelling yucky. Hopefully this will pass soon because I don't know how much more I can stand ;)

Michelle - posted on 01/12/2011

Thank you thank you thank you for asking this. I too, thought my sons were the only gross ones! And thank you for the hope that they will grow out of it!

Nelly - posted on 01/09/2011

I don't understand why parents don't start acting like adults and bathe their children instead of just complaing

Margey - posted on 01/08/2011

As soon as I saw this issue I knew this was the group for me. My 12 yr old son is just like all the rest talked about here. It is nice to know I am not alone. Certainly seems like it sometimes.
Son doesn't brush his teeth or take a shower let alone use deo unless I badger him and even then I'm often met with,"oop, I forgot"! He needs braces too and I just refuse to do it right now since he doesn't brush regularly enough. I'm afraid he'll end up with permenant etching on his tteth from not brushing. Guess he'll be wearing braces in High School rather then Jr High at this rate.

Nelly - posted on 12/05/2010

Every night after dinner my husband and I bathe our children ages 16,14,12, and 10 yrs old. Lucky for us our kids have no problems with us bathing them

Cindy - posted on 09/19/2009

i found the only motivation is to make my daughter hand over the cell phone and computer until she does what she has to do. also, i'm told this is only a phase they go thru

Rhonda - posted on 09/11/2009

What a relief! I too thought only my daughters were stinky girls. My oldest ( will be 13 in January) was horrible... if I didnt tell her I swear she would never shower. And Brushing teeth was like Pulling them! I would tell them daily to do the things they needed to do and the OH I FORGOT crap would spew outta there mouth! Now though my oldest is very cautious abnout things. ( just started 7th grade Jr. high in a new district) maybe me telling her that if I think her breath smells that her new friends will too helped. Now If I can get my soon to be 10 year old to start brushing her teeth more. She wears deodarant and perfume no problem.. but showers and teeth brushing are crazy. I did notice that when i buy her that Agent Cool Blue stuff she has fun brushing... and I let her pick out her own body wash... so hopefully these tricks work. Now... how do I get her to wipe her butt better? UGH!

Valerie - posted on 09/07/2009

OMG, I thought I was the only one with this problem. I have girls, 10 and 12 and they are complete opposites. My ten year old is very aware of her teeth, hair, body whereas my 12 year old I have to hound constantly. Even so far as threaten to get in the shower with her to scrub her hair because otherwise it's a nasty mess! Thank you for making me feel so not alone in this!

Nikki - posted on 07/09/2009

Well, better days should be near for all of you out there...except Bonnie...the post right before mine. My daughter was 11 and almost 12 before she realized that water was not toxic. I would have to force her into the shower. Her hair was a greasy mess most of the time. No oil shortage at my house. Well, in the past 3-4 months she has taken on the 2 or 3 showers and at least 3 pairs of clothes a day attitude. I'm not sure which is worse. At least I didn't have load after load of laundry to do when she was a stinky greaseball. But now she's at least smelling pretty.

Bonnie - posted on 07/02/2009

I knew my daughter was an odd ball. For the last year or two she takes two or three showers a day!!! She steals her sister deodorant, so I now buy her her own. I swear the child makes three loads of clothes herself each with no problem. My husband says she is just becomeing more and more like him.

Anita - posted on 04/24/2009

I have issues with my daughter being a bit lazy when it comes to showering, but I would NEVER watch her/supervise her.. Come on people.. these of our children are at the age where they have changed and formed, so to view them showering is perverted and invasive of their personal space and privacy. All you can do is keep on at them and offer a reward system if really necessary. Its an obvious problem amongst ALL kids this age, so to invade there right to privacy is not O.K.

Jennifer - posted on 04/24/2009

OMG!! I have an 11 year old daughter soon to be 12. She is the exact same way...the worst part to me is that she started her cycle about a year ago and even this doesnt make her want to shower. I just cant believe it!! I have also bought her deodorant...which ever one she chooses, no matter how expensive. She still lets me "oh I forgot" the same with brushing her teeth. I hope this phase ends soon cause I dont think I can handle it much longer!

Julie - posted on 04/22/2009

OH YEA! I AM not the ONLY one! My 12 yr old girl could care less! I hate hearing "oh I forgot!' and my favorite is "when was your last shower?" She will say"I don't know" WHAT!!! I don't get it!!! But I have noticed here in the last month she has been doing better! I think she is getting into the whole boy crazy mode! Suddenly the stink doesn't sound so bad...

Meg - posted on 03/13/2009

We were just really frank - "As you get to be a teen, you're going to get more smelly and your hair and skin will get more oily, so you'll need to shower every other day from now on. This is part of my job as a parent, making sure you are clean enough to be healthy physically - and dirty hair and skin leads to more illness - as well as socially - and dirty hair and skin leads to more pimples and more body oder. "

He groaned, but we're sticking to our guns and it's happening. I'm having to supervise my boy's showers again too;I do think half the time he's just so wrapped up in his thoughts that he forgets to put in shampoo, or uses conditioner instead, or really thinks he has showered since he's wet, even though the soap hasn't been touched. Deorderant is a bridge we have yet to face.

This evening, I noticed my nearly 9 year old has the same rough pre-pimple skin as my 12 year old - I think we're getting a two-for-one special on pre-teen boys.

Rachel - posted on 03/07/2009

I cant even explain how relieved i am to know my oldest isn't the only one and i haven't done something horribly wrong somewhere along the line with her! It's a little better now that she is getting closer to 13 (yikes) i still have to be on her about the shower thing and brushing her teeth but she doesn't fight with me like she use to. Thank you to all who posted!

Carissa - posted on 03/06/2009

Yep, normal.  My son is so nasty, it frequently disturbs me...  Body odor, nastiness on his teeth, poor self care.  Drives me nuts!

Kim - posted on 03/01/2009

It sounds like we are all in the same boat.  I am just going to cont. making her keep herself clean and smelling good.  I try and tell her I am teaching her how to take care of her body as she gets older.  I have no fear that there will be a day when I won't be able to get her out of the bathroom!!  She will be changing 10 times a day trying to find the right outfit.  Until then don't sweat the small stuff and keep reminding them to get clean! 

Jamie - posted on 02/21/2009

My son is 12 and is getting much better. He doesn't mind taking a shower it's just reminding him to do it. I have no brothers so I asked my mother in-law and she said that my husband was the same way. So we all know that it does get better or else none of us would ever date or get married. It's just having to deal with the stink until they catch on. lol

Kathy - posted on 02/16/2009

I have a 12 year old boy and an 11 year old girl. I have tried a few things that seem wo work. The first is the feet smell. My daughter when she takes her shoes off we almost pass out. She has tried putting regular deaoderant on her feet. It works! We also have a chart that they have to cross off every school morning and deoderant and teeth and hair are on it! This also works for us. The last thing is the shower time. We automatically have the every other day shower schedule. They mandatorily have to take a shower every other day. It gives them the relief of the off day and they are ready for the day of. We have tried so many different things and this works for us.

Bobbie - posted on 02/11/2009

Quoting Katina:

Quoting Rachel:

I have two boys, 13 & 12, and they are both going through this lovely stage .... I'm not sure what bothers me more: the ick factor or that fact that my 12-yr old wastes all that water by "faking it" and taking a shower but not washing.

TONIGHT I actually supervised them when they showered - No I am not proud, but at least they are clean.

My mom's advice is that when they discovery the opposite sex this stage will end and fast! I keep hoping!

Yep.  My son is 11 and he does the "faking" thing as well.  Do they think we are stupid?  My kids (have a daughter who is 9 too) even try washing their hair in the sink and that's it.  I have a "smell" test.  They know they better smell like shampoo and soap when they get out or the shower will be cold next time!  I threaten my son with having me for an audience as well.  He doesn't like that too much (MOOOOMMMM! - LOL!)  I can't wait for him to grow out of this but of course my daughter will be right behind him so...  Ah, the joys of parenting.

Thank you ladies for making me not think that my kids were the only stinky, gross ones out there.  My 12 yr old son smells so bad at times.  I too have had to sit on the toilet and make sure he wahes in the shower (don't do it often, unless I need to.).  He would just sit in the tub until the water was ice cold and get out w/o washing.  I to do the smell test.  If I can't smell soap outside the bathroom or on him, he gets back in.  My grandma said the exact same thing about the opposite sex.  Once Danny finds girls maybe he will come out of the bathroom.  Then there is the girl, my daughter 11 hates to shower, but will do everything else.  I so do not remember acting like this at their age.  I don't remember needing deodorant at 11 years old.  Kids are growing up to fast these days!

Kristin - posted on 02/04/2009

Yes, I too have this issue. I hear that it will get better, but it seems as if we are working in reverse order sometimes. I have to supervise teeth brushing, make sure she washes her hair, etc. Very frustrating, but at least I am not alone!

Joie - posted on 02/03/2009

I am new to this group and already SO happy to be a part of it. It's good to know it's universal and not just at my house! Although the waiting til they outgrow it may drive me crazy as I have 4 children so when one is getting through the stage the next one will likely be starting it!!!

Buffy - posted on 02/01/2009

She will come out of it as soon as her friends start talking about it or a guy she likes has something to say. She will be embarressed but sometimes thats how we as parents get through to our kids.

Katina - posted on 01/31/2009

Quoting Rachel:

I have two boys, 13 & 12, and they are both going through this lovely stage .... I'm not sure what bothers me more: the ick factor or that fact that my 12-yr old wastes all that water by "faking it" and taking a shower but not washing.

TONIGHT I actually supervised them when they showered - No I am not proud, but at least they are clean.

My mom's advice is that when they discovery the opposite sex this stage will end and fast! I keep hoping!

Yep.  My son is 11 and he does the "faking" thing as well.  Do they think we are stupid?  My kids (have a daughter who is 9 too) even try washing their hair in the sink and that's it.  I have a "smell" test.  They know they better smell like shampoo and soap when they get out or the shower will be cold next time!  I threaten my son with having me for an audience as well.  He doesn't like that too much (MOOOOMMMM! - LOL!)  I can't wait for him to grow out of this but of course my daughter will be right behind him so...  Ah, the joys of parenting.

Kari - posted on 01/31/2009

My son is 12, hes in the 7th grade and up until this year we had the same issues. However, he has decided to impress the opposite sex. Dont know if this is really a good thing or not! :)

This Christmas I bought him the small pocket-sized Axe spray and he keeps one in his locker and one in his backpack. It helps to spray after PE or recess. I also put Axe body wash, body spray and deodorant in his stocking. He thinks its cool and actually uses it.

Now they also make Axe hair products! That has helped with his hair brushing. I bought him Axe for Shaggy hair. And after he washes it, he thinks its cool to put that in his hair and it actually makes it stay down during the day without the "bed head" look he used to sport everyday!

The new commercials on tv have really helped to re-enforce how "cool" the products are! :)

Amanda - posted on 01/29/2009

last year....at 11 my step son was NOT into the shower....

This year - as soon as JR High happened...he is very clean (I'm not a fan of the axe, but I guess some things you just got to deal with)!!!!

Hopefully It just takes realizing people notice...

Rachel - posted on 01/29/2009

I have two boys, 13 & 12, and they are both going through this lovely stage .... I'm not sure what bothers me more: the ick factor or that fact that my 12-yr old wastes all that water by "faking it" and taking a shower but not washing.

TONIGHT I actually supervised them when they showered - No I am not proud, but at least they are clean.

My mom's advice is that when they discovery the opposite sex this stage will end and fast! I keep hoping!

Carrie - posted on 01/29/2009

OMG i thought i was the only one going through this, Like started abouve i could expect this from a boy but i never thought my daughter would have his problem. AT 8-9 she started complaining that she needed deoderant at this point i felt she was still to young and told her i would get it when i felt she needed it. this yr just after her birthday i got it for her and she will use it every day but she still will not shower with out an argument, i get the i forgot all the time with brushing teeth and washign face but the aboslute worst is she wont wipe or flsuh when going to the washroom. This one i can not let slide.its beond disgusting. I keep trying to remind her adn telling her that her friends wont want to hang out  adn boys wont like her but so far this is not helping. I just keep hoping shell grow out of it fast.

Tina - posted on 01/26/2009

What a relief! I thought it was just my son. I've talked to him. His dad's talked to him. It comes down to a daily reminder and having shower, brush and deodorize on his chart. Is he going to be 30 and still need a chart?

Lisa - posted on 01/24/2009

My son was the same way he is now 12 and just this morning he had to go to school for some extracurricular activities and forgot to brush his hair. It was hard for me because I didn't go through this with my daughter they are 10 yrs apart! LOL... I know its annoying to them you as just, have to stay on top of it. One thing that helped me most is my son complained about a young man who sat next to him on the bus that smelled bad to him. I was able to use that to help me explain to him the importance of hygiene.

Brandi - posted on 01/20/2009

Too funny because that is the exact same excuse I get from my daughter!!! "Oops, I forgot."



I must be an age thing...I hope they grow out of it soon. My 5 year old has OCD when it comes to being clean, washing hands, brushing teeth, and taking showers. How can my kids be so different?

Carolyn - posted on 01/19/2009

You don't know how glad I am that I am not the only one who is going thru this! My daughter has been driving me crazy with this issue. I have to ask her every day if she has washed her face or brushed her teeth. My favorite is when she looks at me and says "i forget" how is that even possible?

Cindy - posted on 01/19/2009

I am in the same boat with my son! He is 11 and I always have to tell him to put on his deodorant and brush his teeth. We don't have a problem with the shower, but if I would let him get away with it I am sure he would skip it. I started to put hygiene on his allowance chart. That still doesn't matter to him. He would let me take $$ from his allowance before he would remember to brush his teeth on his own!! I guess we expect this type of things from boys, but it is still unacceptable. They are just lazy, plain and simple!! Keep on her, she will start to do these things and more on her own. Plus she sees how it makes you feel and that may be adding to her motives as well.

Brandi - posted on 01/19/2009

OMG! You are describing my daughter! I constantly have to remind her to go and do things like put on deodorant and brush her teeth. I keep telling her that if I can smell her so can her friends and they are probably thinking the same thing I am...yuck! It has helped a little, but I still find myself on her case EVERY morning about stuff. I bought her Secret Deodorant that was Jasmine scented and the labels had sparkles on the front...you know at that age anything with 'bling' is fun! I didn't have to remind her for a couple of weeks once I bought that, but I think she is bored with it again. If you find any tricks...please share them!!!