Scared of going through it all again?

Barbara - posted on 05/08/2013

my history: TTC for 6yrs, got pregnant on clomid, diagnosed with pree at 25wks but lost it at 28weeks, am definitely going to try again. done a lot of research on pre e

in my opinion from stories/research read, I think pre existing diseases like (CKD- kidney disease, diabetes, hypertention ETC) are risk factors. nutrition also play a key role as most of these aforementioned diseases are usually influenced positively or adversely by what you eat, and this is even more prominent during pregnancy as your body is expected to work at a greater capacity

also am wondering if how high you are carrying has got anything to do with development of pre e, like the developing uterus is not properly balanced within the womans structural surroundings to support the pregnancy, thereby causing pressure/obstruction /displacement on some vital organs...... well I am just thinking!

but next time I get pregnant I hope to do everything differently,..from my eating habit, sleeping habit, down to work, stress, mood ,antenatal visit, prenatal vitamins intake, personal hygiene etc, most IMPORTANTLY is that no early or frequent ultrasound for me next time!

April - posted on 03/22/2013

Severe HELLP with my first son......second son 2 years later with NO problems....and 2 years after that, my daughter with NO problems. Good luck

Jamie - posted on 02/04/2013

Dont Do itto urself and family if u canhelp it

Jamie - posted on 02/04/2013

I developed severe pre-e with my first son and had an emergency c section @ 31 weeks. He was 3 lbs 1 oz and was in the hospital for 6 weeks I was in the hospital for one week because they couldn't get my bp to go down. It was such a scary experience. We decided to have a second child Bc we heard that there was only a 25 % chance of getting it again. With my second son I had to have an emergency c section at 35 weeks. This time I developed hellp syndrome. Ky son was fine but I ended up in icu w/ water in my lungs bad fever and had to get 4 units of blood. I was so scared I wouldn't survive and b there for my family. The doctor told me that. If I get pregnant again icould die Bc my pregnancies have got progressively worse. Birth control failed and i am pregnant again only 5 months later. I am one week away from my doc appointment and scared to death. I don't know if they will tell me to terminate or proceed w/ the pregnancy. I am faced with the decision of proceeding w/ the pregnancy and dying or stopping my baby's. Life. I don't want to leave my family or hurt them. Or hurt my baby. Seeing the pain everyone went thru when I was In the hospital

Mel - posted on 01/16/2013

Me. My daughter passed away 3 days old. I spent my pregnancy. Well the 28 weeks of it in the hospital at 9 weeks. A nightmare. Highest doses of bp meds weren't lowering or stabilizing my bp. Migraines. Anxiety. Emergency c section because i wasn't going to survive. My heart aches to start a family but I'm absolutely terrified. I am also looking for ways to maybe start planning but ugh. The fear.

Kathryn - posted on 12/08/2012

HI i am 43 nd almost 3 months pregnant and i hear you, my last pregnancy was 23 years ago and it was the most scarest thing ive ever experienced, my daughter was born at 28 weeks around 4pounds. Yes i remember delivering normal birth but after wards i passed out, and spent much time in the delivery room with a nurse and hooked up to all sorts of things i remeber it clear as day. This preganacy is treated high risk with early intervention oppose to emergency intervention im scared, but have been blessed at my age newly married and pregnant, doesnt stop all the sarry thoughts and these are also hindering me from enjoying my pregnancy which makes me sad....I pull on my constant talks with the lord hope my story helps you settl a little it has helped me sharing it with you.

Cynthia - posted on 11/26/2010

I had HELLP and not pre-clampsia but I am afraid that I will develop it in the 2nd pregnancy. We were lucky this time that Katie was a good weight when she was born at 34 weeks but I will be very nervous when I get pregnant for the 2nd time.

Shannon - posted on 07/31/2010

My 1st pregnancy, I delivered at 35 weeks, emergency c-section due to preeclampsia. 2nd pregnancy, I had twins, delivered 36 wks due to preeclampsia, but not as bad as 1st time. So I have been high-risk every time. This time around, I have had absolutely NO trouble with bp or preeclampsia and am 37 wks. Did get gestational diabetes this time but has been under control and not really a problem. I've not been put on any kind of bedrest this go around and have been extremely healthy. POINT: Each time is different. I am so thankful for my beautiful children and am soooo glad I didn't let my fear of another nightmare round of preecl. keep me from having them. No one can guarantee that it won't happen again but it doesn't always happen again. The up side is actually that the dr is keeping a close eye on things since I'm high risk, so I don't have to sit home and worry or wonder if things will be ok. Have learned to have peace about the things I have absolutely no control over and pregnancy complications are one of those things. I hope you are able to make that big family happen! My kids are the best thing I've ever done and I wouldn't trade one day of bedrest and drs for the family I have. Hope you have a great day!

Cheri - posted on 07/23/2010

I realize this is an old post but I'm sure future moms will be reading it when faced with this decision...



I think anyone that had severe pre-e or any level of HELLP would be lying if they told you they weren't concerned about it at all. It is a natural thing to be concerned when you have been through this kind of trauma.



As for my story... To make it short-I went into beginning of pre-e at 24 weeks. I was on bedrest in the hospital until delivery at 27 weeks when they did emergency c-section to deliver my baby girl at 2#6.5oz and 13 3/4 inces. I had gone into kidney failure from extreme proteinuria and also was on the verge of eclampsia (was becoming incoherent and confused). I was on so many different IV meds that I was not allowed out of bed for 48 hours. My daughter was so sick that I didn't even get to see her until she was 4 days old because each time I was stable enough they would let me go down and see her, she was having some type of procedure done or had just finished one and was so cold she was wrapped in so many warm blankets I could not ever see her from the wheel chair I was sitting in because I could not stand. For the first week she was on the lowest step down of a ventilator (as in there was nothing more they could do to help her keep breathing). After that she did a lot better but it was such a terrifying experience. Once she came home 62 days after birth I developed PPD and PTSD. I had been getting up everyday and doing what I had to do for her that nothing had really sunk in about what happened except for having the occasional breakdowns that are inevitable. My PTSD was bad enough I would have full blow flash backs and panic attacks. I also had to deal with having my c-section wound open up because of a severe hematoma that had developed from being on Heparin. It had to be healed as an open wound being packed with gauze daily until they could place a wound vac on it. The wound vac dressing had to be changed every two days for over a month and then I had to have bandages applied every two to three days until it was fully healed (3 weeks after she was home). To top it all off this happened to me three years after my sister alsmost died of HELLP.



So as far as having another one... it is a scary thought. I have had every blood test under the sun done now and all have shown no abnormailties except I have a positive ANA test. The only thing they have not done yet is a kidney biopsy and I'm not sure I will have that done.



Of course I would be high risk now and my OB said he would put me on medications to begin with now. He told me that I would basically cut my visit times in half from normal. Come back in one month would be two weeks, two weeks would be one week and once weekly would be twice weekly and I would most likely start once a week sooner. He said I should also plan on having blood work at minimum every two weeks once I hit the 20-22 week mark and then after awhile once weekly.



Even with all of the trauma and heartache and worry that was involved, I plan on trying for another one around the time our daughter is two. Many people think I am crazy and have asked me why I would want to go through that again. My answer is simple to undertand yet lengthly... It was a horrible way for a pregnancy to go but I have my daughter and I love her more than anything. Micropreemies are only given to the people who can handle it, when they can handle it. I didn't ask for it to happen that way and nothing I did or didn't do could have made it happen or prevented it, but my daughter and I and the rest of our family are stronger for having gone through it. God knows what we can handle and what parents these little miracles need to be blessed to. It may be me again or it may not but I have enough love to share with another child and have promised that no matter the circumstances I will love my second child as unconditionally as the first. I have promised that while I may worry (as I am only human) I refuse to live in fear. It has taken me awhile to get to this point but it is how I truly feel and I am resolved to stay this way. I know that all sounds easy to say but I truly believe it in my heart. I know that my statistics are around 40% of developing pre-e again. We are just hoping that with medicating early it will happen much later into my pregnancy.



If you need to seek counseling do so. I don't mean to convince yourself to have another but just so you can become resolved on where you stand. Having a second after this type of trauma is not for everyone. I say this under the assumption you really are wanting to have another, or I would doubt you would be seeking out these responses from others. However, if you are not wanting to don't let anyone try to convince you that you need to. It is your decision. My sister had HELLP at 34 1/2 weeks and their decision was not to have any more. Perfect example of it not being for everyone and she is also resolved and at peace with her decision not to do so.



Good luck either way!

Kylie - posted on 05/26/2010

There is no clinical evidence that diet helps avoid pre eclampsia. I did all that and still got severe early onset at 27 weeks with my first pregnancy. It's certainly a good thing to do, but I avoided saturated fat, refined sugars, ate good sources of protein and 7 - 9 different fruits and veggies a day, and I still got it.

My consultant did a risk assessment on me for future pregnancies, and I was assessed as having an 80% risk of getting it again, and we've decided not to have any more children.

Joseph was born at 27 weeks weighing 1lb 7oz.

I would strongly suggest you get medical advice and find out from your doctor your own personal risk factors and how a future pregnancy would be managed in detail, for example would you have aspirin daily etc.

Nicole - posted on 05/24/2010

I am expecting my 6th child in 8 weeks or so. I had HELLP syndrome with my first pregnancy and did not have the best c-section experience. It can be a bit scary, there is so much going on there and things CAN go wrong. I have had 2 VBACS (not in a row) and am hopeful for my 3rd. The OB doesn't want me to VBAC and I have anxiety about it. I had the best birth experience ever with my last and would love that again. My 3rd pregnancy I had some symptoms of HELLP but nothing came of it. I had a little protein in my lab last check up and am a little bit worried.

With all the "high risk" many doctors do not have a hard rule about what makes a mom high risk. It really means they may need to see you more frequently than the norm and keep an eye on you labs and test (which they should do anyway).

I would suggest eating a very pure and healthful diet to avoid pre-eclampsia...lots water, pure foods and protein. and exercising. It is most common in the 1st pregnancy but can happen again. I have had 2 great pregnancies with no issues, 1 pregnancy with some symptoms of the upper chest pain and itching but labs were borderline. There is hope.

Nicole

Nicole - posted on 05/20/2010

I am very scared. I developed Pre-e/HELLP at 19 weeks and lost our baby girl at 24 weeks. I spent a week in the hospital having doctors try to get me to get me to dialate. They used a pill and had to rub it on my cervix (sorry if that is too much) They had to do it every 4 hours and it lasted for 52 hours! It was not working and they didn't want to make me get a C-section because they would have to cut me vertically since I was so early. I just try to keep telling myself that I am taking all the precautions I can (if that is even possible). I have lost 27 lbs and I am only 5 lbs away from what my doctor would feel comfortable with. I am not huge but i guess bigger. We play to try in September again and i hope to be 160. I have had all my labs down and a US on my heart and kidneys. All were fine.. so I just pray that it was god telling us it was not our time.

Janine - posted on 05/13/2010

i know how you feel! We're thinking about starting for our 2nd. Our first baby boy is nearly 2. I spoke to the Dr's they said it will be a high risk pregnancy and they will be giving me wekly checkup's with the OB right from the start. Also they have recommended for me to start taking calcium tablets now before concieving and from 6 weeks 100mg a day of aspirin- which is meant to help prevent it. I'm very nervous though, but thankful I had a perfect pregnancy from 0 to 34 weeks!!

Cassandra - posted on 05/07/2010

I had hellp with my first at 30 weeks. Work up one morning with a funny pain the doc sent me for an ultrasound of my kidney and was rushed to the OR 15min later. i had NO IDEA what as going on everything happened so fast and there were so many people rushing in to talk to me. I am now almost 30 weeks with my second. I was so excited about trying again but the second I found out I was I went totally numb. with fear that it would happen sooner. y doc is amazing. I go every week for monitoring so that they can see any small change. So far so good. Now I look at it like we made it this far every week from here on out is better than last time. I have totally prepared myself for another NICU stay. That is "normal" to me.

Leah - posted on 01/24/2010

i had preeclampsia with my daughter had an emergency c section and am now pregnant with number 2 and am scred of having another preemie i don't mind being sick it's for a good cause but i hated being apart from my baby and not being able to see her cause she was transfered to a hospital 2 hrs away and we only had 1 car and my husband needed it for work. if i have another preemie it would be the same situation and i would hate to go through that again so i did ALOT of research and until my dr tells me not to am trying to get 12 g of fiber a day drinking lots of extra water cutting sodium in take WAY down so i don't retain water and taking a potassium supplement which is suppose to help blood pressure and the heart and was one of the recommendations for women to avoid preeclampsia lots of potassium and lots of fiber! i am still working but i got preeclampsia while i was staying at home but i'm taking it very easy.

Margot - posted on 12/31/2009

I was scared too, but decided to take the risk. Having HELLP the first time, I developed preeclampsia at 32 weeks. I went to 37 weeks. I was VERY well cared for, with a blood pressure monitor at home, mid wife visits to my home. Luckily I lived only 10 mins from Hospital so I could go in for tests every couple of days. While it was a lot more intense than 'normal' pregnancies, it was worth every needle, every urine collection - we have a beautiful second girl, Isla, born at 37 weeks. No NICU. Straight home. What a difference than the first!

Sometimes it really helps to go through some counselling if you and your husband are open to that. The emotional stuff that goes with HELLP & preeclampsia is extememly difficult to process.

Heather - posted on 12/06/2009

I had pre-eclampsia the worst with my first child and I thought I could never go through it again! I now have three beautiful boys and and had pre eclampsia with all of them. Not as bad the 2nd and 3rd time though. Make sure you have great doctors watching you. For some reason it always hit me around 32 weeks. I loved my obgyn though, they took great care of me and new what to do for me. I had a great supportive husband too!

Ashley - posted on 09/02/2009

I had preeclampsia with my first son. Luckily i didnt get it till 36 1/2 weeks and went to the hospital and delivered him via cesarian after trying to induce it didnt work and pushed my blood pressure higher so i wass taken in for emergency c-section. I am now 25 weeks with my second son and i am very scared of getting it again my son was diagnosed with an abdominal birth defect at 18 weeks and im afraid that the preeclampsia could make him be born sooner than he needs to be

Becky - posted on 08/15/2009

Hi - I am 38 weeks pregnant with my second child. I developed pre eclampsia at 25 weeks with my first child and (luckily) slowly got sicker and sicker and was induced at 40 weeks.



I put alot of research into a second child - its a hard place to be.... you have a vision of the family you want but then you need to find out what the cost is to your health and to their health. We saw various doctors with various opinions - however I couldnt pay one of them to take care of me. Therefore I am in the high risk program in the public system (Australia).



I took aspirin for the 2 trimesters but stopped at the third cause I had a large bleed the first time around. Have worked really hard on my nutrition - as one of the theory's as to why it occurs is poor nutrition and as a vomited at least 10 times a day during my first pregnancy I wouldnt be surprised. Another theory is its an auto immune response to the placenta, to which I have since found out that I am an autoimmune person so I take really good care not to overdo it, stay away from sick people.



The hardest part of doing it again is getting it mentally right - that was then and this is now, totally different story, etc etc. I am finding it extremely difficult right now as I am 38 weeks - so close but so far - knowing that I could still get sick, finding it hard with all the doctors appointments to make sure I am not getting sick. Then there is the other side that wasn't there the first time - such as taking care of a toddler and trying not to let him miss out on me because I am being over cautious.



I am currently trying to work getting mentally sorted on the labour side - as my labour was terrible, we both nearly died several times.



If you decide to go ahead, I guess my advice is get the right support medically, make sure you're partner is aware of a high risk pregnancy and what goes with it, get yourself in the right place mentally and do whatever you think you can to minimise the risks -- and I do mean whatever (counselling, lucky charm, etc, etc) to make yourself feel better about it all.

Kathryn - posted on 07/29/2009

I had the same fears after I had PE and HELLP syndrome with my first. Though I did have PE and HELLP syndrome again with my 2nd, it was a little less scary since I had been through it before. My PCP didn't treat me as high risk, and in fact told me that I was less likely to have it a second time, though the OB who delivered my first told me I was more likely. I think having a more vigilant doctor would have been very reassuring to me, and would have given me the diagnosis of HELLP sooner. I made it full term with my first pregnancy, but progressed much quicker and was more seriously sick with my second and had to be induced at 33 weeks. My daughter was born healthy and only spent 2 weeks in the NICU, but we decided that we should stop while we were ahead. I don't regret having a second child at all, but don't want to put myself through that again for a third.

Elizabeth - posted on 07/24/2009

I had developed HELLP with my first pregnancy and delivered stillborn twins at 20 weeks, and my second pregnancy was a year later, and I developed HELLP again and my daughter had to be born at 30 weeks via C-Section. They say it shouldn't happen again, but it did to me. I have read a lot about HELLP syndrome and some studies have shown that if you take a baby aspirin every day during your pregnancy it will reduce your risks of HELLP greatly. You would have to talk to your doctors obviously, but I know I will be talking to mine if we decide to try again.

Sarah - posted on 07/20/2009

hi iv just found out im pregnant again with my 3rd my first was a straight forward pregnancie no problems born 6days over weighed 7lb,6oz my second i was told from my first scan i wouldnt go to term as she was small then at 22wks i started getting signs of pre-eclampsia my little girl was born at 28+1wks and weighed 1lb, 7oz now im so scared of it happening again this time, this pregnancy was not planed i was on the pill but can not bare to have an abortion :(

Jo - posted on 07/10/2009

Hi,

I had Hellp and preeclampsia with my son hayden. He was born at 35+6weeks gestation via emergency c section.

I have just found out recently that I am oregnant again and I am petrified!!!!!!!!

My dr has told me that I will be a high risk pregnancy so there will be "better" care this time around. However she did say that I will probably get high blood pressure again, which was one of the reasons for delivery with Hayden.

I completely understand what you are going through!!!

My biggest cause of anxiety though is that I will be 24 when I deliver this new baby and I want to experience a natural labour. If I am denied this oppurtunity it will break my heart!!!!! Its all I ever wanted to do and I feel that I was robbed of that experience the first time around. AS I will be counted as high risk I have been told that I will have to fight for the oppurtunity to at least try for a natural birth.

Good luck with decideing what you want to do!!

Elaine - posted on 07/08/2009

I had HELLP at 24 weeks during my first pregnancy. I delivered via csection and Emily survived for two hours after delivery. I joined the preeclampsia.org forums and learned about underlying disorders. I the doctors did blood test on me to check for these disorders. I have MTHFR and APA. APA can cause blood clots. The doctors said with Emily my antibodies were to turned on and had a clot to the placenta that stunted Emily's growth. She stopped growing at 21 weeks. Antibodies related to the APA can be turn off or on during different pregnancy. During my second pregnancy I was taking Lovenox ( blood thinner) and a baby aspirin nightly to help prevent blood clots. After the lost of our second baby loss due to severe spina bifida at 12 weeks, I researched MTHFR and learned that it can interfere with the absorption of folic acid. So now during my third pregnancy I am on Lovenox, prenatal with 1mg of folic acid, over the counter folic acid and B12, baby aspirin, calcium. We are no 33 weeks pregnant. I have been on bedrest for 6 weeks do to 24 hr urine being a little over 300 and for a bp spike. Things are better now. My bp in now normal and my 24 hr urine is 275. This was my journey to my 3rd pregnancy. I am cautiously optimistic but not scared. We may not be as far as we are in our currently pregnancy if it were not for my two precious angels in heaven. I learned with each pregnancy the different steps I needed to take to have a successful pregnancy. We hope to deliver between 36 and 38 weeks. I have learned to just listen to your body and do not be afraid to call the doctor when something does not feel right. It is important to have proactive MFM doctor and a proactive high risk OBGYN.

Elaine

Elaine

Julia - posted on 06/17/2009

Hi!

I had my daughter by crash section at 30weeks due to HELLP pre-eclampsia. It was thought to be standard pre-eclampsia until 24 minutes before my little girl was born.

Apparently I had been suffering from the condition since around 20 weeks as it is around that time that I stopped feeding her properly. She was born at just 1lb 7oz and spent 7 weeks in NICU but she amazed everybody and gained strength daily. I was not so lucky though. They had warned my family that I may not pull through the delivery.

I was in intensive care for 4 days and then kept in for a further 9 weeks.



We needed fertility treatment to conceive and I was told that I would need further treatment if we wanted more kids.

So, imagine my supprise when we found out we were expecting twins.



The fear of developing HELLP and going through all that again was just unbearable but we were promised constant care and monitoring throughout. We were warned that the chances of developing HELLP again was significantly higher due to the fact that we were having twins.



BUT...we were also told that if I was to get it again it is almost always less severe than the first time around.



I am now 35 weeks. I have been checked and scanned every 2 weeks by specialists and had some very crowded meetings, lol.

They have made it clear that the first sign of anything happening again I would be admitted and it would NEVER be allowed to get to such a severe stage.



So far there have been no signs of it re-occuring and I feel totally blessed to be having more kids. If I had let the worries get to me too much I would have probably regretted never having more.

Trust in your doctors.

It is worth the chance.

I hope you don't let this horrible condition put you off and rest assured that you will extremely well monitored this time around.

I hope this helps. x

Heather - posted on 06/03/2009

I am EXTREMELY scared. Actually want to try to have a baby again soon but the thought of everything I went through and what my daughter went through because of it scares me to death. Let alone the endless bed rest again. And what if things go even worse next time?

April - posted on 05/28/2009

I was worried about it, but I'm now 35+ weeks with no signs of it this time... Every pregnancy is different and just cause you had it once doesn't mean you'll have it again.

Kristi - posted on 05/21/2009

Yep ... I am definitely scared to have another one. My delivery with Wes was horrible ... and I never want to experience it again, but we would definitely like to have at least one more baby. We will be waiting for at least 3 years before we even think about getting pregnant again ... so Wes will probably be 4-5 years old because baby # 2 comes around. I will be considered a high risk pregnancy for any future pregnancies!

Julie - posted on 05/19/2009

I feel the exact same way. I would like one more baby so mine isn't an only child, but it would be considered high risk as well. My hubby has said he couldn't go through it again, he was right there when I had an eclamptic seizure and understandably it terrified him. Even though the doctor said there is no obstetric reason not to have more children, there are psychological/emotional reasons to be ambivalent...

Kim - posted on 05/18/2009

First off, your baby is ADORABLE!!



Secondly, yes, I am scared of it happening again. I got lucky this time in that I was already 34 weeks before it hit and I was able to make it to 37 weeks before delivering and DD didn't have any problems. However, I'm worried that next time I may not be so lucky and that it'll hit earlier and I'll have to deliver sooner.

Nara - posted on 05/18/2009

Yes very! I hated that heart monitor machine, it wouldnt let me sleep for 5 days, always going off and nurses telling me to rest when I had that stupid alarm blaring at me :( They wouldn't let me breast feed or even hold my baby the first 3 days because they said it excited me too much. I think that was the worst time of my life, wanting my baby so badly to make all I was going through worth while and being told I couldn't.

I keep hearing mixed advise of the possibility of getting it again. My doctor said that so long as the father was the same I probably wouldn't get it (he thinks its caused by the mother's immune system rejecting the baby). But my Internist said they would keep an eye on my BP from the moment I knew I was pregnant because I was at higher risk of getting it again. Dont know what to think!

I've read of some good BP meds you can take from the get go to hopefully avoid or postpone getting it again, Norvasc, methyldopa, Aldomet, and getting a perinatologist onboard from the start. So heres hoping!!