Do you think it's okay to pay kids for good grades?
Whether it's a good or bad idea to pay kids for good grades is a parenting debate that continually comes up. Which side of this hot topic do you agree with and why?
I think that offering incentives always helps. It has helped me achieve goals at work. I think it depends on how you approach it, if your kid won't study for a test unless you give him a twenty, that's not teaching him anything but that you're a sucker he can manipulate. Creating a long-term goal, like, if you get straight A's I'll buy you that XBOX kinect, and really only buy it for him if he meets the criteria you agreed on in advance - don't just cave and buy it anyway - or he will never bother trying again and will learn nothing about consequences. Set attainable goals and offer a realistic prize you can really afford. For instance, if your child isn't capable of earning straight A's, then offer a prize for honor roll, and a slightly lesser-valued prize for earning a's and b's and only one C, etc.
yes and no, good grades are something their suppose to get. hell, i might pay my child for good grades or i might use her freedom as a bargain. freedom meaning: cell phones, computer usage, hanging with friends etc.
I think that education is like employment. If we teach our children that it is important to do your best in school and in work, then they will strive for the top. Reward them with things that are important. This may not always be money. My daughter would do anything to have a break from cleaning her room, however she is almost 9. I just had this conversation with my brother, if we pay for good grades, does our children pay us if they get bad grades? Every school year, I enter an agreement with my child. If they do good in school, the can participate in activities. I guess, I do not have an opinion on children that do not have extra school activities.
I've struggled with this through my children's school careers. My dad was an educator and said "absolutely, NO WAY!". He believed that learning needed to be intrinsic- a desire from within. Adding the extrinsic reward meant they were doing it for the money or the parents and not for the love of knowledge or to expect more of themselves. My oldest son did not find that intrinsic value, finished 2 years trade school beyond HS, and is now in the nuclear program in the Navy (a very smart guy)! He wishes I would have pushed him more in HS and that he would have gone on to a 4 year college. I guess he found his inner motivation later in life. This is also the kid I finally had to PAY HIM to take a shower-- believe me-- we tried everything. After paying him $1/ day to take a shower, for less than two weeks, he stopped asking for the money and showered on his own. Maybe paying HIM for grades would have been best?
My older daughter is in her senior year of college and has gotten good grades through school. We praise the hard work put into the good grades and might have her favorite dinner or go to the movies to celebrate.
My youngest is a sophomore in HS and just this year is showing the intrinsic desire to work for her good grades.
It's hard to stand strong when all of their friends are getting paid bucco bucks for their grades but we've done it. The idea of paying them for their "job" makes sense to me too and makes me wonder how my kid's lives would be different if I had done that. Good for my son, not good for my daughters?
See my confusion?
We look at it like I have seen alot say so far on here. School is their "job" so why not pay them for a job well done. We have an incentive chart for our 2nd grader. He gets 2 stickers for every A Test paper and report card, 1 sticker for every B Test Paper and report card, none for C's and so forth. We calculate once a month or after each six weeks of school and he gets 25 cents for each sticker. He can also earn stickers doing other things like his chores, etc. It works for us and he appreciates knowing that he worked for that money! :-)
We never paid our children, two for excellent grades. A special words, We are proud of you.
It's been so long ago I can't recall. Maybe a special dinner or treat.
If you pay them in this day & age I think it is fine but within your budget.
If u can afford it. Do it! We ha ve 5 adult children who are all great achievers. We paid for A grades. Not a lot but enough to motivate. Our children received NO money other than for work. Birthday money was divided by age and everyone got the same HOLIDAY money from which they needed to buy a gift for themselves to put under the Christmas tree. It worked very very well. There was no asking for money for movies or skating as they had their lump sum to work from. The wheeling and dealing and pooling of money was awesome to behold. Worked so well for us all. They all own their own homes, even the baby who is only 22, and single, still living at home. They will always have more money than their folks! So proud of them!
Depends on your kids. I see schoolwork as my kids' jobs. Paying them for a job well done is ok- just as I get paid for my job. However, my kids are very humble, non-materialistic and often give a large portion of their money to the church or to homeless people. If they ever came to expect the money or became overly self-indulgent, the money would go away!
No way! Good grades are something that is expected, unless the child is dong his or her best already. More like studying the required time. It would penalize the child who doesn't do as well or can't.
I know a family who did pay for good grades. One young adult in that family is doing fairly well, one is in and out of jail for drugs and DUI's and still living at home. Third also at home separated from hubby with a child. There were other factors that contributed. However I still doon't think it is a good idea! I
I don't think it is a good idea, people grow up to expect payment for any good works!
We absolutely paid our kids for good grades BUT the scale paid out for A's, B's, nothing for C's and they OWED US for D's and F's (which never actually happened). In the real world a job well done brings a financial reward. We felt grades were comparable but that was pretty controversial among other parents!
I used to say "no, I won't pay for grades". I truly believed that a kid's "job" was to go to school, do the work, study and get the grades. However, as my kids have gotten older, I have discovered they sometimes need an incentive. Peer pressure is so strong to be a slacker and I had to face the fact that my kids are with their peers more than they are with me. So this year, I am paying for grades. However, there is a flip side to this deal I've made with my kids. For every A (on a report card), I'll pay $25. For every B, I'll pay $10. I'll pay nothing for a C. The catch is, for every D, they owe me $10 and for every F they owe me $25. So far it's working. They're already planning on what their going to do with the money. It's a constant reminder of what they need to be focused on during the day at school.