How do you help your teenager with rejection?
Teenagers can be catty and mean to each other, and with all the drama, at some point your teen will probably get the short end of the stick. How can you help them deal with rejection?
I tell my daughters that there will always be difficult people in our lives. Those situations help us learn how to cope with kids that are different than we are. This also helps us empathize with those who are different. No one likes to be rejected. It hurts. Knowing what that feels like helps my girls be more sensitive to others.
My girls get made fun of because they do not wear makeup, they have hearing aids, do not curse, and do not have cell phones. I have told them that they are diamonds and all those kids out there are the rough. They are diamonds in the rough. They have to look for the other diamonds that are out there looking for them.
Always make sure your teens know they are loved and they are beautiful. If your children have good self esteem they can battle any one. The ones with the lowest self esteem are the ones causing all the grief. We say how can that be when they act so self assured. Some people act that way to hide their jealously and insecureness. So by hurting someone else it makes them feel better about themselves. Hold your heads up and ignore those who act self righteous around others. Stay away from those who oppress you.
I agree with Christy, girls will always be difficult people in their lives. I've explained to my daughters that it isn't nice. Asked how they felt and explained that some people do those things because they are jellous of you and want to be like you. But if you retaliate things will get worse and most of the time that's what they want to see. Do unto others as you would like done to you.
This question to close to home my daughter is popular but when certain girls have parties she never gets invited. The reason they don't invite her is that she takes the attention away from the party girl/s There have been many nights that my daughter has cried herself to sleep. What we did was get her involved in sports and she made some amazing new friends that just love her and are true friends we also transfered schools.
Girls can be so cruel without even knowing this.
When my girls start to get catty, I ask them to remember how they felt when someone made fun of them for something silly or out of their control. Then I ask, "Why would you ever want to make anyone feel that way?" Always treat others as you would like them to treat you.
Go to your church group of kids----be with like minded kids and get the support of them. When you are with your like minded and of the same faith, there is always someone to help/talk with. This too shall pass!
This posting was what I needed to read this morning. My daughter is one who likes to have a lot of friends. However, she has been with a group of girls at school who just treat her terrible. An example is this weekend she went ot a birthday party of one of the girls. A few of them started talking about her, whispering etc. She called me, asking what to do. I gave her some advice and she did end of staying. The next day we took one of the other girls on an outing. She felt that if she could have alone time with the girl that their relationship would improve. We all had a wonderful day and I felt so good about things. Monday comes and now that girl won't even talk to her. Acts as if she doesn't even exsist in school but was fine the day before. I've told my daughter that she needs to act as if it does not matter to her and to try and branch out and find new people that are more like her. Even if she might have to go to the library and sit by herself is better than putting herself in a position to be shunned or hurt. It really hurts my heart. I just don't understand why this happens. How to you help your girls feel better about themselves?
I tell my kids that there will always be some people who are ornery and don't know how to be real friends. They are to treat other people the right way anyway. (Wouldn't it be great if EVERYONE followed the Golden Rule?) They are not to use the meanness of others to excuse bad behavior in themselves & they should allow their feelings to teach them how others also struggle when teased, neglected or rejected... Just keep on being the kind of person you know you should be... It's more important to be a decent person & respect yourself than to be popular. Others will respect you for this, even if they don't show it right now. ... In our family, Jesus Christ is the role model. He has shown us our true value to Him/God by what He went through to bring us to Himself. We can certainly take some of the hurts & difficulties that come our way more easily when we remember what He went through for us.
What I was told as a youngster was to keep asking and one will eventually bite!
Unless they are the extreme version of anything, leave it alone. I have a daughter who I have had to bite my tongue plenty of times about the way kids would treat others. This is what kids do and this is what molds us into adults and learning how to deal with situations. My daughter is a very popular teen now and she is the bestest friend I could ever ask for. She has learned to deal with people in her own way and doesnt react to the people that are looking for a reaction. She sticks up for kids who are less fortunate than she is and she makes it a point to make someones day every day. Dont worry, this will all pass but rejection is a part of life as is most other issues kids deal with and its so easy for a mother to wanna break out her superwoman costume and save the day but your kid will suprise you and realize they too can be a superhero.
i think they want to do thinks there on way.we have to let them find out ,fore them selfs .wat is right fore them.you can not always say this wat you have to do,you can say ,this looks like a good thing fore you ,you can try and find out of this works fore you .but some time they wil make the wrong way,they wil have to find that right way again ,thats wen you have to be there .let them feel that they did wat they did was right fore them .some time they wont find it at all.wat then .they stil have to live and make a living .they depend on us .they dont want to lurn anny more .live it self wil be there school ,they wil see wy they have to that .if not they can always work with there hands .in anny way they can .who now one day they find some thing in there hobby's and make that there work.there live .
Teach your daughters to be stong and pretect themselves against predators like most men are. Do not tell that "some are good', 'not all are bad" etc. Most men are nasty and they stay that way .... Don't lie to them...