Is it okay to serve alcohol to the adults at a kid's birthday party?

At a baby's birthday party there are often more adults than kids. It is okay for adults to have alcohol at a children's birthday party? Why or why not?

40  Answers

0 10

I understand your points. BUT To me, giving out alcohol at a childs party, then putting those same parents behind the wheel of a car, Impaired, with their children in the vehicle, is just irresponsible. Would you like a friend to yake your child to a party, drink, then hop in the car to drive your child home? Let kid parties be for kids. Have adult partied for your friends. Kids are the most vulnerable beings on earth. If you do plan to serve drinks....How about a sleep over for the kids too? That way no one is taking their kids out on the roads with even one drink under their belt!

49
0 10

I cannot believe people would get behind the wheel of their car, children in tow, after having even ONE drink at a party. Get a designated driver, get a babysitter, or DON"T DRINK. Be the responsible one. If we go to a party and want to have a drink....I ALWAYS do one of those three things. Your kids are not worth losing over one drink. I grew up in a family where the adults drank and NEVER drove. We never had to be worried about our safety. They would never put us in danger. I think THAT is teaching responsible drinking to kids..... Having a couple and driving them home is NOT!

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0 15

Seriously?? You can't go a couple hours without a drink?? It's a kids party for goodness sakes....just wait till it's done! It's not about whose drinking responsibily...there shouldn't be alcohol at a kids party at all.

47
24 19

100% Agree if you want to have a drink on your birthday fair enough bit not at a kids one.

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5 8

Well, my take on this wd be YES as long as its just a couple of drinks..nothing overboard...why? 2 reasons, that adults feel welcome too and get a chance to mingle...and children would know that adults drink RESPONSIBLY...so when they do know what is right as they grow up ..Drinking too much is abusive to health and they need to know that from parents like us whom they hero- worship when they are babies...We could promote healthier talks and openness between kids and parents this way..Only when things are taboo do they create a sense of curiosity in youngsters...anyway they are aware that we drink...so why not do it responsibly in front of them....? so am i making a ny sense here?

47
29 10

i agree with Sapna...i just had my daughters 4th birthday party in the yard, and the adults came too...they had alcohol. Most of the time, the kids were together, and the adults were together, so the adults had "their" time....no one goes over board, but they enjoy socializing with other adults. I don't think kids, especially at that age, even REALIZE what the adults are drinking, let alone know what alcohol is (again, depends on the age group). And as far as someone putting down a drink, parents are usually pretty responsible watching out for their kid. It would be the same thing as if it were a regular BBQ at someone's house...everyone we know has kids, we get together for BBQ's, and there is alcohol...can u imagine a summer bbq with lots of people and NO ALCOHOL???? Chances of that kind of get together where adults don't drink (at all) are very slim...

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0 10

I say no, not for a child's birthday party. There's no reason for it - everyone is there for that child. If you can't mingle without alcohol, then you need help. After the party is a different story. Family gatherings that are not child-focused, again, different story. My mom and grandparents always had a drink when we had family get togethers or bbqs or other general party things - but when it came to birthday parties for my cousin and I, no drinks. The focus should be on the child and activities for the child.

42
1 11

Couldn't have said it better myself. Great answer.

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0 0

I think It really depends on what kind of party you are having.

I would say yes if it is an intimate gathering of family/friends for a birthday dinner/BBQ with people you know. I would say no if you are having a party with school friends and parents you don't know.

33
17 21

that is exactly what i was thinking, no one was asking if you are allowed to drink and drive...if it is a gathering between friends kids and grown ups you know, why not...everyone is allowed to have fun, it is not about "you can't be without alcohol for a couple of hours" I managed pregnancy and nursing time without, gooosh, I like to have a glass of wine, and why not have it on a party!??! having a glass of wine or beer does not mean you get totally drunk and are not able to watch your child anymore, actually i never did wince my child is born (or i got pregnant and a long time before), it is always stupid to get totally wasted, however I do not drink when I am together with colleagues or parents (e.g. kindergarten) that i do not know

2 0

I really don't see any reason for it. When I'm planning my son's parties all the money, time and energy for the party is focused on making it fun for him and his friends. I also wouldn't serve food that he didn't like, or play games that he couldn't play.

32
1 5

I agree with you Misty, It is a special day for your child and the focus should be on the children. A friend of mine recently asked her daughter if she minded the adults having drinks at her birthday party and the answer was a resounding NO. I found that interesting.

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6 1

Really? I have been raising kids for 18 years now and it has never crossed my mind to have a drink at a birthday party. I see parents drinking at Chuck E Cheese and I can't help but wonder what kind of parents they are that they can't get through a noisy crazy afternoon without a drink. You don't need alcohol to be able to mingle with other guests, this isn't a club! Guests who are single and don't have children can and have a good time without drinking. As far as kids not noticing, yes they do! When kids grow up thinking that its normal to see adults come from work and have a drink thats what they will do. When kids hear their parents say " Oh I could use a drink, I have had such a hard week" they grow up thinking alcohol is a way to relieve stress. When kids see that the adults drink at social gatherings, they learn that they need alcohol at their social functions. So, why are we surprised when our teens drink? If you believe that reading to your toddler, taking them to church, not swearing, or censoring what they see on television and the internet are all examples you need to set for them, why would drinking in front of them be any different? To parents of young children, it might seem like you have forever to teach and inspire your kids to greatness, but this time goes by so fast! Put the money you would have spent on alcohol in a retirement or college fund and enjoy your kids party for what it is, a kid party.

27
3 28

What a GREAT comment!! So glad to see someone who sees a childrens party for what it is - a CHILDRENS party :)

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0 0

no it's a childs party and it sends the wrong message . children remember these things and tend to repeat them when they grow up. also what if a child picked up an unfinished drink that someone has put down for just a few seconds let alone a few minutes then what

26
0 9

That is a good point. This has happened at a family get together once we attended. However, some people feel drinking is an adult priviledge and we can't do everything "kid friendly". After all, we are adults and deserve to have adult drinks on occasion as long as it's not excessive. I respect those who do not drink, though. It's a personal choice, I feel.

0 9

No it is not. its not about the adults its about the child that is having the party

22
8 1

No I dont think it's ok because its a childs party it should be centers on the kids entertainment not the parents. I just had my sons birthday party and by keeping an activity itinerary with activities that the parents had to help their kids with I made sure that both kids and parents were engaged throughout the party. I don't think drinking at a childs party is appropriate for the situation, there is a time and a place for drinking and a childs birthday party is not that place. if you want to drink have an adult party.

20
1 0

Good Idea Precious Dragon Good Idea

0 9

Absolutely ok! How can children learn to be cool and responsible about alcohol if u don't teach them by good example? alcohol gets way too much attention that makes it so interesting for the kids. So what if u have a beer at a party? I don't see the big deal.

19
1 1

A child's party is not where you reinforce YOUR drinking habits... I guess you've never heard of kids sneaking drinks at these types of parties huh? I know you'd like to think your kids are trustworthy but all kids sneak to do something... I just hope it doesn't cost a child his life from alcohol poisoning... Not to mention the Dept. of Children Services will take your kids away if any child is accidentally harmed during these "harmless" Keg Kids parties. I guess you didn't hear in the new of the recent death of a child because the thought drinking alcohol was cool... Read Up & empower yourself for your family... or your life too can be an accident waiting to happen.

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17 3

I don't think there is anything wrong with it as long as you dont invite your friends that get load and crazy..lol.. i remember the grown ups drinkin beer when i was young..also it is about family comming together to celebrate.. its fine..just no drunks..i think some people are to uptight about this

15
4 23

I agree here. A few beers and some wine never hurt anyone. And the grown ups who come by themselves and who have to drive the kids home always decline and those that come as couples can agree one can have it and the other one doesn't. If you make a big deal out of it then the kids will notice if not then they don't even care.

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6 0

I don't drink so i wouldn't want it at my house more less around my kids. So i would have to say no. its a kids party.

15
858 17

I would say yes it's okay. We've had beer at our childrens birthday parties. Noone goes overboard. Just has 2-3 and that's it. If there's something going on afterwards that involves the adults off to nanny's the kids go! At Christmas we always have a couple drinks with the family. I personally dont see a problem with it but that's the way i grew up

13
0 19

I don't see a problem with it as long as the adults are responsible about it.

12
0 17

No way! Why would you want that possibility of a parent drinking and driving with a little one in the car. I know you can't control there actions but think if th kid got hurt because u chose to have alcohol at a party. Would you be able to live with that? Just a thought not trying to put anyone down

12
0 0

No its not in my opinion.. after all , it is a KID'S BIRTHDAY PARTY , sure some adults can be responsible and would like to have a few drinks, but it IS NOT THEIR Birthday Party, its the kid's!

11
20 24

I say yes its ok but it depends on what your friends r like and how long the party will be i remeber a few birthday parties i had growing up and my dad always was drinking beer with a couple of his friends i think it should be limited though. Don't invite drunks to your party! it depends on if u drink or not also. I am not a drinking so I wouldn't offer people drinks but if there was going to be a few adults kicking around for my kids party and they brought alcohol with them i wouldn't stop them from drinking it unless they got drunk and was going to ruin the party then i would kick them out.

11
3 20

Wow, you would actually let another adult bring alcohol to your kids party and not say anything. You obviously are not confrontational or something. How disrespectful can you be to actually bring alcohol to someones childs birthday party!! I would be turning them right around and showing them the door.

16 1

It really depends on the nature of the party! If you know everyone well at a small gathering, it's easier to make sure little ones don't pick up a stray drink. Exposure to responsible drinking sets a good example. But with a lot of people, or people whom I don't know (who might have alcohol issues) I think it's better to just drink soda!!

10
0 20

You could also buy blue cups for kids and red cups for adults and make sure they know red cups are not for kids. Thats just an example it doesn't necessarily have to be cups. But thats how you could help with the kids pickn up an alcoholic drnk

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0 0

I wouldn't have kids over at my house if I didn't know them and their parents, that being said I personally would have time and activities for the kids and parents to enjoy together and then once. Air and presents are over with and the kids are all off playing with the party favors and new toys I want to be able to relax with my friends and if we chose to have a drink while we are doing that cool with me. I refuse to shield my child from alcohol or make it something that is taboo to them, that kind of this is why kids go nuts drinking underage and getting into trouble. If a child grows up seeing that alcohol can be a casual part of life that is nothing to make a big deal out of as long as its used responsibly they are less likely to go out in highschool and end up with alcohol poisoning or trying to drive home drunk. I wouldn't feel bad one bit about having a glass of wine or a beer with my friend and letting them take their child home. IT'S THE RESPONSABLE PART THAT COUNTS!!! If they only had 1 or 2 and it's been a few hours THEY ARE FINE TO DRIVE!

9
0 28

no! what's wrong with people....alcohol should not be a part of a celebration of any kid where kids are not able to be a voice. I'm frustrated that at the end of the night adults can not be responsible enough to make this choice and what's best for the child...Alcohol can have greater affects than smoking and yet we have greater restrictions on smoking than drinking.....what'swrong with this picture....I don't care if it's in your home and under control. You mold your kids from young on and if this is regular pratice than they learn that it is acceptable and than one day you wonder why they turn to driking. If you can't have a good time without alcohol for your children you need to re-evaluate your priorities.

9
0 0

It isn't about not being able to go without alcohol. I agree that we mold our children from a young age but that is the perfect reason to drink a beer or a glass of wine in front of your child, to be able to hang out with your friends as well and show your child that there isn't anything wrong with it. Treat alcohol like its the most taboo thing on the planet and that is what a child grows up to think and it encourages them to go out and wheel around drinking. I would personally much prefer my son growing up thinking that alcohol is something that you can drink without making a big to do about as long as it is done responsibly. I would much rather educate my child on being responsible with such things rather than try telling them just don't do it or there is something wrong with drinking in moderation. Lead by example and show your child that being responsible with alcohol is the best approach and there is not a single thing wrong with enjoying it that way.

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24 19

I grew up with parents who didnt drink in front of me. I am not in anyway a drinker nor did I find alcohol a taboo substance that I couldnt wait to get out and abuse. I am 30 and have been drunk a handful of times because I didnt see alcohol as the only way to have fun at a party. By drinking around your children you are showing them that you need to have alcohol at a party to make it a good one.r I actually got teased more by friends growing up because I didnt get absolutely drunk when we were clubbing and thats because I dont need alcohol to have a good time. Yet all my friends whos parents drank at their parties and in the house in front of them do . So no drinking infront of your children doesnt take away the taboo it makes it.acceptable and fun in a childs eyes.

7
6 26

Or, drinking in front of your children can teach them that there are adult things and kid things. They shouldn't think they are your peer. They can't drink, drive, smoke, vote, marry, enter into legal contracts...etc. So, thanks for judging me, but (and brace yourself because this may come as quite a shock to you since you know me so well) I am fully capable of having fun without drinking. But sometimes I like to exercise my legal right to enjoy a drink.

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0 13

I don't agree with Alcohol @ kids parties, I never allowed it and never will, that's just me.

7
0 5

As someone who had parents that invited "their" friends to my parties as a child I'm in the middle of this decision. I haven't had any alcohol at any of my children's birthday parties because the party was for my children not the adults. That being said if you are having a party or bbq in general not a birthday party where the main focus isn't on the child I think that having alcohol is ok. Bc the party is a get together for everyone. As long as it is done in a responsible manner. Children's birthday parties are not a place for the adults to get together for "adult" time, its about the child(ren). It can be very hurtful for the child when adults start drinking and having adult time when the party is supposed to be about the child and not about getting together to socialize with your friends. I know this from experience. Bc no matter what your intentions may be we all like to have fun and our attention can turn selfish without even realizing it. Parties that are family oriented that have alcohol can be very successful as long as its done properly. Parties that are for a child, where the focus is solely on a child(ren) should be a child's party. Juice packs and sodas can be just as relaxing as a frosty mug of beer or a great glass of wine. :)

7
64 80

If it is understood that we will be drinking in moderation, then I say absolutely it is fine. I do not think it is okay to be drunk in front of a child ever, but to have one or two is okay.

7
1 35

No I do not think adults should be drinking alcohol at a kids party. How are the adults going to pay attention to what is going on if they are drinking. It is a KIDS party.

7
47 32

I say yes it's fine. Keep it simple like beer only, no mixed drinks. To the untight people who say, "it sends the wrong message" is ridicoulous. Also just b/c you don't drink does not mean other adults don't. Also if you have not your child that u don't drink someone's drink or not to pick up a stray cup/can then u have not done your job as a parent.

7
0 2

You're a moron.

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0 15

I think its fine so long as you are smart about who you invite! Lets face it we all have friends that like to drink too much and act like an idiot at any party. So you would only invite the people who are only going to have a few social drinks. Yes, the party is for the kids but you don't have to treat the adults like kids and they too need to be able to enjoy themselves. AND to the people who say "what would happen if a child picked up the drink?" NO offence but if your child picked up an alcoholic drink and actually liked it enough to drink it...umm you prolly already have a problem on your hands. And by the way who the hell is supervising the children?? I don't think alcohol is your problem its your ability to actually watch your kids!

6
1 0

Yes, we always have beverages for all the guests at any party we have.

6
19 5

If it's just a beer or two, I wouldn't judge a child's parents for allowing drinks. I might have something to say if adults are getting wasted at a child's party because like another person said, the adults need to be alert to the children. A child's party shouldn't be a place for adults to get wasted and act like fools. It's supposed to be fun for the kids.

6
0 39

I think at can be inappropriate at times. My 6 year old son was invited to a birthday party by another boy at school. Most of the party was spent riding their scooters up and down the street which was a closed in court but still dangerous as it had a u-bend that was a blind spot for some drivers. The Mothers (wealthy Mothers) spent the WHOLE time behind the fence of the house drinking wine and chatting!!! I could not believe it! Only myself and one other (sensible) Mum decided to sit outside and watch the kids in the street, nobody else seemed to care! I decided then and there my son wouldn't be spending any more time at that child's house. Just goes to show money doesn't buy good sense.

5
1 16

see that is totally inapropriate....In this case the drinking involved not watching the children and it sounds as though it was overindulgent...this is totally different than the adults at a party having a beer or two while still enjoying the party and interacting with and properly monitoring the children. Having a few drinks does not mean that you CANNOT watch your children and it should not mean that in ANY situation...least of all for a CHILD's birthday party. It really sucks that you had to endure such an irresponsible group of parents and I am sympathetic with you. Thankfully you and the other Mom were there to be responsible for the children involved.

0 1

yes, as long as you don't serve too much cuz someone still has to keep an eye on the kids and be responsible

5
2 3

NO. It is a party for the children. The adults need to be alert and interacting with the children.

5
0 0

i think it depends on whom u have invited.. if there are people who wld get drunk and make a scene.its best avoided to serve drinks..otherwise Have fun!!

4
1 25

Yes, it's ok. I've had several birthday parties at our house and there is always beer and wine. I have NEVER seen a child pick up someone's drink and take sip. Additionally I have never seen anyone get drunk. If we have the party at an establishment then there isn't any but that's not our choice...rules of the place.

4
3 23

Well I've been to both and I'd say it depends on the crowd. I will have alcohol at my daughter's first bday but I won't at my son's 3rd.

4
136 24

Myself I wouldn't serve alcohol. It is your childs party, center it on the children. There is the drinking and driving thing and although I understand that one drink may not make you impared I still don't think you should not drive especially with your kids in the car even if it was just one drink.... imo. I don't see why as a patent you couldn't not have a good time at a childrens party without alcohol, what exactly is there to gain serving alcohol vs.. punch coffee tea etc, That having been said we have served alcohol at weenie roasts and campouts where our kids were present. No one was driving and having a cold beer around the bonfire seems different to me than at your kids bday party somehow. A few hours one afternoon at your kids party doesn't seem to me like it would be any better by serving alcohol, imo. And why risk any of the unlikly but not impossible unpleasant things that can happen,

3
15 22

Absolutely not Cause the last thing someone would need is a little one running up and taking a swig of a adults couple and You have a wasted little one.
We have Soda Juice and Milk at my little boys Parties

3
9 9

Only if the adults are capable of NOT acting like children when even mildly intoxicated. A beer or a glass of wine early on, with sodas/water/non-alc for at least two hours before party's end I consider to be drinking responsibly.

2
36 5

Of course, not suggesting people get drunk, but where parties are really aimed at the adults anyway, you serve whatever suits your guests (and the time of day), getting drunk isn't appropriate of course, though i've been to 1st birthdays which were very boozy affairs. Thats not to say when kids are older are you have young guests that you are responsible for, that it is appropriate to drink then - thats different entirely. For our daughters' parties we did serve alcohol but as i was breastfeeding each time, no chance of a drink for me.

1
6 3

In my experience, kids seem to start noticing that some drinks affect grown ups at around age 4. At 1st and 2nd b-day parties, which if we're honest are absolutely for the adults, I think a champagne toast or a glass of wine with a meal, if served, is fine. Should parents be chugging six packs of bear or doing shots? Of course not. If a guest overindulges, find somebody to drive him/her home --and don't invite that person next time you have a party. I know this is hard if it's family (my mom is an alcoholic who is not allowed to drink at my house, if she wants to participate in family events --which occasionally include alcohol). Once the parties really start to be "for the kids" --I think it depends on a lot of things. We hired a shuttle to pick up and take guests home for my son's 3rd b-day party. That was one (pretty expensive) solution. And when the parties become "parents optional" (age 7 or 8 usually) there's no reason for alcohol to be served at all, though it often is.

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