What's the funniest thing your child has ever said?

17  Answers

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We have twin boys that wouldn't stop asking EXACTLY how the labrador dad got the lab in our "labradoodle." This was the moment we were waiting for to explain the birds and the bees. I didn't expect to be alone with them in a drive thru.
After my "sex education 101" in a chicken joint parking lot they sat open mouthed and silent. There was head tilts and scrunched noses and finally one of the boys said, "Aren't you glad you only had to do THAT once to get two babies?"

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So many things to choose from! Let's see here, when my son was little, and he sneezed, he would say, "Splash You." Quite descriptive, I must say! My middle daughter used to call the fat man in the red suit "Santa Closet." We always wondered, why is he in the closet, anyway? My youngest once crawled into my husband's lap and tenderly told him, "Daddy, your breath not stinky today." The ultimate compliment!

http://themeatandpotatoesoflife.com/2010/06/09/music-to-my-ears/

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My 4-year-old daughter Allie wanted to go outside and ride around the house on her bicycle. I told her, "Remember, you need to wear your helmet when you ride your bike." She looked at me seriously and earnestly and replied, "It sometimes works without my helmet."

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My 4-year-old daughter Allie wanted to go outside and ride around the house on her bicycle. I told her, "Remember, you need to wear your helmet when you ride your bike." She looked at me seriously and earnestly and replied, "It sometimes works without my helmet."

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The funniest thing my daughter has ever said was when she saw my neighbor was pregnant. She walked right up to her with a straight face and says, "you have a baby in your belly?" My neighbor responded, "Yes I do!" and with confusion on her face she tilted her head and said, "You should not eat babies!" We busted up laughing, but she was serious and very concerned that my neighbor had eaten a baby!

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I was getting ready to get in the shower when my 3 year old son busts open the bathroom door and yells "Woah, BIG BOOTY!!!"-- http://journey2milfhood.blogspot.com/

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While in a stall in a busy public restroom with my 3yo, she loudly annouces that "Mommy has a penis!" I started giggling before I could correct her and then she says, "No, I mean Mommy has a big vagina!" The ladies room errupted into a cacophony of laughter. I was mortified.
www.shannonlell.com

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My son asked me the other day mum can I have a baby sister I said no you already have 2 big sisters he turned to me and said o well I just thought Ide ask you dont get anything if you dont ask so just thought Ide ask.Then he just walked away leaving me laughing.

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My 11 year old makes up all these weird stories like how Betty white drinks a half gallon of pure evil every mourning before a jog

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One of my 18-month-old twins is a little man of few words, but sometimes its what he says with his facial expressions. For example, this admission of guilt after snatching a snack from my purse was priceless. :)

http://fullhandsfullheartblog.blogspot.com/2012/05/caught-ya.html

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I was watching a signing time video with my 4 year old daughter, Eliya, and we saw (for those of you familiar with signing time) a clip of little Lucy in her wheelchair. So I used the opportunity to explain to my daughter that not everybody is as lucky as us to be able to walk, and Lucy uses this special chair as she can't walk. She asked me why she can't walk and I explained that G-d made her not be able to walk.
The next day, we were watching over a friend's baby and we were talking to her but of course, being a baby she wasn't talk back to us. Eliya immediately commented that obviously G-d had made this baby not be able to talk.
It was a funny-serious moment, where I realised how much a 4 year old (and all children really) absorb and internalise what we say. It really is worth using every experience to expose your child to different concepts, as they can learn to be as tolerant as we teach them to be.

http://mygoinggreenblog.blogspot.co.il/2012/06/how-to-get-eco-friendly-free-signing.html

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Hard to choose...but here's one from our 6 going on 14 year old daughter ~
"I just made a decision that could be life changing. I'm going to start coloring more with crayons than markers."
I guess if your life consists mostly of coloring, I can appreciate that. :)
Here's a post of from my blog for more .....
http://ggsyellowbowl.blogspot.com/2012/05/tales-from-back-seat-and-beyond.html

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My 17-month-old ran up to the television pointing and screaming "OBAMA!" She was right.

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The other day my 6 yo said,
"Mom, I don’t like all five senses of bananas.  I don’t like to taste them.  I don’t like to smell them.  I don’t like to see them.  I don’t like to feel them." 
"And you don’t like like to hear people eat them?"  I asked.
"I don’t even like to hear people talk about them!" he said.
I guess he really doesn’t like bananas!

http://ichoosejoy.org/

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The absolute most hilarious thing my daughter ever said was when she was around 2 years old. Myself, being a vegan, I wasn't crazy about the idea of her drinking cow's milk, so I tried one day to introduce her to almond milk. I told her "cow's milk is for baby cow's, not people, so I want you to try this almond milk and see if you like it". My little 2 year old answered back " is that what baby almonds drink?"
And by the way, she prefers cow's milk to this day.

www.bohemiansinglemom.blogspot.com

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The funniest thing my twins have ever said (and they still say it all the time) is, "Mom, you talk TOO much!" -- it's funny because they are 100% right! I'm a talker -- as a Mom, for my work, and in life. I love to chat.

http://www.mysocalledsensorylife.com

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