What's your funniest potty training story?
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One our funny moments -- allowing our boy-girl twins to sit on matching potty chairs in our family room in front of the television at the same time while Mom and Dad bribed them to GO PEE and GO POOP! I would never have believed that I'd have allowed my twins to sit on potty chairs outside of the bathroom. But never say never!
My daughter was not very regular so pooping was always very painful and time consuming. Needless to say she was not a fan of sitting on the potty waiting for her painful poops to come out. She became quite constipated and I had to give her a suppository. She was excited when I told her I had medicine that would help her to poo, butexcitement quickly turned to fear and disgust when I told her where the medicine was going. After much bribing I finally gave her the suppository. She was crying pretty hysterically and was very upset. But no less than 5 minutes later she had to poop, so we got her on the pot and she unloaded the motherlode! She was cryingvwhilebshe was poling, but these were tears of joy. She kept saying between sobs: "it worked! The medicine worked!"
Last summer, working on potty training our 2 year old.
Me: Kate, do you want to try going potty before we go swimming?
Kate: No. I pee in pool.
Oh God, I'll never forget it as long as I live.
My oldest son was three years old and really struggling with pooping on the potty. We were doing a lot of cheerleading and bribing, but nothing could convince him to make the transition from pull-up to potty.
Our house was on the market at the time and I had an agreement with the realtor that she would always call first before stopping by to show the house to potential buyers. Well, one day, she called and said she was 10 minutes away and wondered if she could stop by with some clients who she thought would LOVE my house. My 3 month old baby was napping and I explained that I didn't want to wake the baby and leave, so she would have to show the house while we were there.
I was racing around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to stash clutter and tidy up when my son announced that he really had to poop. (Of course, right?) I was tempted to tell him to just go in his pull-up, but I didn't want to confuse him, so I popped him on his potty and told him to call me when he was done.
Two minutes later the doorbell rang. As I was welcoming the realtor and the potential buyers into my foyer, my son came walking down the hallway toward us, totally naked from the waist down and holding a fresh turd in each hand. "Mommy! I did it! I pooped on the potty!" he exclaimed with pride. "See?"
The realtor started backing toward the door and stammered, "Oh, we'll just reschedule when you're not so busy. Sorry to intrude!" Needless to say, that family did not buy our house.
We had almost finished getting our 4 yr old twin girls potty trained, except one of them refused to poop in the potty. She'd pretend to be trying very hard to poop there, but then announce that she couldn't - and then demand a diaper. Literally 10 seconds later, the diaper would be full of poop that it would be our joy to wipe off her butt. Not.
We tried bribes, everything we could think of. Then on Father's Day at a church BBQ party, we had no access to a diaper, and she'd been eating a lot of fruit that day...well, I was too busy at the face-painting booth, so my husband got to do the honors. The girl required a full hose-down, as the diarrhea had been rather explosive.
After that, my husband, my mother and I all had a brainstorming session to try and get the girl to be diaper-free, and my mother came up with the idea of getting one of those kiddie-type laptop computers with a few games on it to use as a bribe.
It didn't work at first, but after the girl saw her sister getting all the computer time for successful potty poops, she started doing it too! After about a week of this, she was diaper-free!
My youngest son seemed to never take the time to go No. 2. And, consequently, he became very constipated on many occasions. So...my wife and I created a little Poo-Poo song and dance that we did. Silly, strange, we didn't care. If it made the boy poop, it was worth it.
We did the jazz-hands stuff and danced around the bathroom as we sang, "Big Poo-Poo, Big Poo-Poo."
Wow...what a time it was. But you know what? It worked!
When my oldest was potty training, he just couldn't grasp the concept of peeing directly in the toilet. Or maybe he just didn't care. Anyway, since I was the one cleaning up all the accidents, I decided to lock the two of us up in the bathroom, strip him down to his birthday suit, and wait it out. How long could it possibly be until he finally felt the urge? Longer than I anticipated. He played happily with his army men while I sleepily sat Indian style on the floor struggling to keep my eyes open. Our bathroom was very small, so when the urge hit him, it was either going in the potty, or in my lap. Lap it was!! Just as I drifted off to dreamland, I felt a warm stream of "WAKE UP NOW DUMMY!" on my lap. I was jolted awake. Reacting quickly, I spun him around just in time to complete the stream in the potty! He had this light bulb moment. Finally realizing that was what I was wanting him to do all along. From that day on, he successfully pointed his stream into the mysterious white bowl beside the tub.
Forgot to tell them to keep their heads out of the toilet.
While my husband was in residency we had the twins in a preschool program that was run through the public schools. The school system had many requirements that included the children being “bathroom independent”. This means they require no assistance in the restroom.
I walked in the classroom one day to pick up the boys when the teachers suggested that all of the parents of boys to take the boys home and put them right in the bath. The teacher was smiling and could barely say it without laughing. I waited until all the other parents left the room, (my morbid curiosity as both my boys were wet) and approached the teachers. I said something like, “OK, I know mine were part of whatever went down today. What exactly happened?”
The teachers suddenly had a confused look on their faces and one said, “Well, I was in the hall waiting for the boys to finish their bathroom break and they were taking a little longer than usual. I decided it was getting way too loud in there so I opened the boys bathroom and…I don’t understand why…I mean they were laughing and…ALL OF THE BOYS WERE STICKING THEIR HEADS IN THE URINALS AND FLICKING THEIR HAIR AT EACH OTHER AND LAUGHING!”
Whhhhaaaaattttttt????? Then suddenly I figured out what would make them do this and I knew that mine had started it. The night before, to keep them busy, I put a couple inches of water in the bath and dyed it BLUE and gave them toy sailboats and they were pushing them around. I told them we were playing “ocean”. I was busy changing sheets when I heard them getting loud and when I walked into our bathroom they were leaning over the side of the bathtub and were dipping their hair in the blue “ocean” water (the color of blue urinal thingys) and flicking it at each other and laughing like fraternity boys half way through a keg.
So mine were to blame and since it was pretty funny and since I never really got along with “teachers” I said, “oh, that’s my fault. Whenever one of them has an accident in their pants I dunk their head in the toilet to teach them a lesson.” And then I walked away. What are they thinking leaving a bathroom full of boys unattended?!
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The funniest part of potty training for me was seeing how upset my daughter got when she had accidents that first day. It was as if the world was ending. Which I suppose is why it didn't take long for her to catch on!
Where to start? I found the whole potty training experience of my sons (referred to in writing as Boy #1 and Boy #2 - and I'm sure you can work out the pun for yourselves) so traumatic that I started a blog based on my diary entries for the time. My rationale in writing it down - pre-blog - was that if I could make it funny, it wouldn't seem so bad. Nowadays, potty training is LONG gone for our family, thank heavens, but having seen today's prompt I knew the time was ripe to go back through the archives. Here's something I wrote on The Potty Diaries back in September 2007...
I don’t really know what to say about my experience with Boy #1 this morning.
He announced that he wanted to sit on the loo after breakfast (rather than on any of his other assorted potties), so I settled myself in for a long session of ‘3 little pigs’. For some reason he demands stories when he’s on the loo, particularly that one. I hope that in years in to come it doesn’t act as a subliminal trigger; he may find himself in difficulties when he reads to his own children...
However, instead of asking for his usual story-based entertainment, he wanted to hold my hands, and then proceeded to pull on them whilst he had a poo. I didn’t know quite where to look… and was trying desperately not to laugh and break his concentration. Is this how midwives feel? (Am reminded of when I was in labour - both times - and produced poo rather than a baby for what seemed like the longest time. It’s perfectly natural, apparently. But I didn’t know this at the time, and my embarrassment was made much worse by the fact that NOBODY MENTIONED IT. We all knew it was there, but no-one could quite bring themselves to admit it… Sorry – have I grossed those of you who haven’t had this experience out?)
Anyway, back to Boy #1. Of course the end result was a poo in the toilet, which only a month ago was something I never thought I’ld see, so I should be grateful for that. But I have to ask myself; is this hand-holding something I’m going to have to keep doing, and for how long? And if so, is he going to demand the same service of his teachers at nursery? That could be embarrassing come parents evening…
And finally; where on earth did he learn the trick of it?
Don't know if I'd call it "Funny"... My 5 year old was having a hard time with his night time toilet training. We had gone full circle from cold turkey to night time pull ups to cold turkey again.
One night he went to bed with his brothers (7 and 4 (still in night pull ups)) at 7:30pm, he did a big wee and fell asleep. I was going to bed at 10:30pm and checked on him... still dry! YAY! I sleep walked him out to the toilet and he did a little wee and I put him back into bed.
Now, Mr 5 has the ability of wetting his bed, changing his PJ's and then just getting into bed with us. This particular night, I was up and down a bit with his sister (1) and every time I woke, he wasn't in our bed, so I thought that all was OK. Not until 5:30am did I realise it wasn't the case.
Just before my alarm going off, Mr 5 wandered into our bedroom nude. He was cold, so I told him to come over to my side for a cuddle. I asked "Did you wet the bed buddy?" he replied with a sultry nod. I said "Don't worry mate, you almost made it all the way through the night.
After having a cuddle for a few minutes his 7 year old brother woke up and called out to us. I went into his room.
"Dad, I don't know what happened, but my bed is wet."
"It's cool mate... it happens to the best of us." I responded.
"No dad, my bed is wet, not me"
That is when I noticed the first pile of wet size 5 PJ's... I went into Mr 5 and 4's bedroom to find 2 more piles. Poor Mr 5 had wee'd his bed, moved to Mr 4's after changing his clothes, then did the same in Mr 4's bed (he was still sound asleep, but his bed and he was wet) and then did the same again in Mr 7's... must have ran out of PJ's and came into us nude.
Lots of washing that day ;)
I have potty trained nine of my ten children to date, but I have to say that my ninth child has been the most interesting. EVERY SINGLE time the child poopies in the potty, he identifies the shape like most of us do with clouds and he announces it. This odd practice has the whole family running to the potty each time to view his plop. Comments like this are heard at each viewing, "Oh wow! It does look like gun!" or "How about that, it IS shaped like a whale!" My child's strange ways has the family doing something none of us would have ever dreamed of doing...and with great anticipation. Who would have thought...
Funny. I just wrote about this on my blog. My youngest son as with most kids would not stay on the potty long enough to actually do anything. We tried book, toys and even Angry Birds on my phone as I cringed everytime it looked like it was going to go in. Singing is what worked and one song in particular that I made up new words to.
The Toddler on the Potty (Sung to: The Wheels on the Bus)
The toddler on the potty goes (pee, pee, pee), (pee, pee, pee), (pee, pee, pee)
The toddler on the potty goes (pee, pee, pee) all day long.
The toddler on the potty goes (poo, poo, poo), (poo, poo, poo), (poo, poo, poo)
The toddler on the potty goes (poo, poo, poo) all day long.
The toddler on the potty goes (wipe, wipe, wipe), (wipe, wipe, wipe), (wipe, wipe, wipe)
The toddler on the potty goes (wipe, wipe, wipe) all day long.
The toddler on the potty goes (flush, flush, flush), (flush, flush, flush), (flush, flush, flush)
The toddler on the potty goes (flush, flush, flush) all day long.
The toddler on the potty goes (wash, wash, wash), (wash, wash, wash), (wash, wash, wash)
The toddler on the potty goes (wash, wash, wash) all day long.
The toddler on the potty goes (dry, dry, dry), (dry, dry, dry), (dry, dry, dry)
The toddler on the potty goes (dry, dry, dry) all day long.
The funniest bit was when he sang it for Grandma.
When my oldest was getting to the age where we wanted to get her potty trained, I sought the advice of my aunt. She had two kids in their teens and a young daughter just one year older than mine. I asked her for potty training advice and her reply was: "I tried all that Dr. Spock crap with the older kids, this time around, I just gave a little treat whenever she went potty successfully. It may be 'wrong,' but she was potty trained in half the time with a lot less hassle."
I used this methodology on all 5 kids. All were fully potty trained by age two and a half with no psychological damage!
My youngest son who is not yet three woke up the other day and wanted to wear underpants "like the big kids" so I figured we would try it. I asked him, repeatedly if he had to go potty and he continuously said no. Just as I was about to get him from the playroom to put him on the potty I heard his brother (who is 4) say, "Do you feel like you have to go poopies?" He answered, "No, I feel the poopies in my pants." Needless to say he is back to diapers, I have no desire to try to train one more boy who is not remotely ready!