How can I fix my daughter's frizzy hair problem?
36 Answers
Would you let your child dye his or her hair?
What age do you think it is okay to let your child try dying their hair?
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40 Answers
33 Votes
As far as I am concerned, it is only hair. I let my son wear a mow-hawk, he uses colored gels to spike it up. He has done it since the first grade. He has tried many hair styles. Now he wants to dye his hair purple for the swim team color. I told him I would dye it if he fixes it everyday. We will see what he decides to do.
You have to choose your battles, and hair grows back.
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Lisa - commented on Sep 22, 2012
I coudn't agree more. My son has done the same regarding hockey. My daugher is going on 13 and wanted to dye her hair, so I did it for her. Its not permanent, and will grow out. You have to let your kids express themselves in order for them to "find themselves" so to speak. Its all a learning curve, for us as parents and our ever growing children.
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Stephanie - commented on Oct 3, 2012
I aggree with both of you and as I told my Mom 10 years ago when she was raising step kids "it's ONLY hair Mom, they are exceptional kids both with straight A's.....what a little spiky highlights?" She did it for them and they looked cute! So when our 12 yr old hit 5'8" this summer and she was doing great, at leader at church, and on her soccer team, I asked my hubby "Ok so would you care if I let her get highlights from ME?" He said "as long as it's not $100 and you can keep it up, and she wants them I'm fine with it." She loves them and they look like the sun kissed her hair, she has a lot of natural highlights anyway. It's only hair and ALL of us have had different big hair, short/short hair, or shaggy hair at some time in our lives! One thing is certain.....hair changes! Pick your battles!
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Nicci - commented on Oct 5, 2012
My daughter is 14 and I just dyed her hair, she likes it! I say choose your battles. People opposed to it.......do you let your child wear nail polish? Same thing?
27 Votes
When they are no longer children and have a great paying job.
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Stephanie - commented on Oct 3, 2012
I don't think in this day and age that is a resonable response. Is it such a big deal if they want a few highlights, that THEY can pay for (from a $6 bottle)? My rule is make exceptional grades, and I require A's as long as you are able to make them, and then hair is not a big deal. I pick my battles and hair changes and grows back!
16 Votes
I don't think that a child should dye their hair until after puberty. Introducing chemicals prior to this time may lead to permanent damage of the hair follicle. I am not a professional and cannot attest to this being a 100% occurrence; but why risk it?
Now if there is some overriding social need that outweighs the risk I have mentioned above, then go for it. But as with all parental decisions, it should be made with careful thought based on the individual needs of your child and not based on what "Susie's Mom" lets her do.
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Corrinne - commented on Sep 16, 2012
It is absolutely not true, I am a prfessional, and anything you do to your hair cannot affect how it will grow out. The only thing that can change that is if your scalp is severly burned by a chemical, and hair color, whether in-salon, or OTC is not strong enough to do that.
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Karen - commented on Sep 19, 2012
i've been dying my hair since i was 18 (26 yrs) and i still have most of my hair and haven't lost any do to dying,
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Tonya - commented on Sep 20, 2012
I wasn't saying that you would lose your hair due to dying....but it can change the chemistry of your hair. For African-Americans introducing a chemical to your hair prior to puberty can permanently change the behavior of your hair. How do I know this? Because I have seen it happen....to more than one person. Since I am not a professional (which I stated above) I cannot speak for the masses...but from personal observation and experience it does happen.
15 Votes
I don't want to let my daughter dye her hair at all, she's such a beautiful natural blonde. But that would be hypocritical since I've been dyeing mine for over three years now. I will, however, make her wait until she's old enough to handle most of the mess herself, so likely not until her high school years. Beyond my 'but your pretty hair!' reaction, it seems silly to prevent it. Even the funky colors! Green, blue, purple, why not? It grows back, and as long as she school has no ridiculous dress code against unnatural colors, it's their chance to get it out of their systems. The kid is the one who has to live with the reactions, not me. If I am unfazed by Transformers tees and rose petal tutus worn together in public, why would purple or green hair bother me?
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Wendy - commented on Sep 5, 2012
My daughter is 14 and just started her freshman yr in HS....she wants to dye her hair green and blue.....and I was thinking along the same lines as you and will prob let her do it.
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Joanne - commented on Sep 5, 2012
my son is 10 and has been asking for over a year to get a red Mohawk, he keeps his hair short as its very thick and when it gets past a certain length grows out rather than down, this summer holidays we have let him have the Mohawk but lightened to blonde (his hairs a light brown) rather than the red, its all cut out now and is just a short spiked style with blonde tips as school do not like them to have coloured hair (even natural colours) and have to be"sensible" styles, i got advise from several hairdressers other than the one that did it who all said it would be fine with no long term damage
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Mary - commented on Sep 5, 2012
Well, in the first place, school dress codes exist for good reasons, so dismissing them as ridiculous is a bit harsh. Having spent more than a quarter of a century as a middle school educator, I will tell you that implementing the dress code helped our campus in countless ways. If the dress code includes a prohibition on hair coloring, then let the hair coloring come out during the summer. My daughter had beautiful blonde hair, as did her very good friend. The two of them visited with a former classmate two states away. When our girls returned home, they were redheads. Not even a pretty red, either. Our girls were 16 at the time. I let my daughter know that I was not contributing to the maintenance of that hair color. Period. When she was 17 and wanted to go back to blonde, I paid $$$ to one of the best hairdressers in town. I was perfectly happy to maintain her natural, God-given hair color. Over the years, she has been back and forth between red and blonde. She currently has blonde hair. Her daddy is happy to see her back to her "real" color, as am I. She is an adult and can choose to do whatever she wants with her hair, but we (her parents) really prefer her blonde hair. Her daughter is blonde. I hope she never goes red!!!
11 Votes
Im a hairdresser and will let my girls have a subtle change when they are 13. A few highlights etc.. a good alternative is hair extensions as they come in every colour and dont damage the hair! If my girls want crazy colours then extensions it is.
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Kim - commented on Sep 7, 2012
What a great idea, I had never thought of that.
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Temika - commented on Sep 27, 2012
That was the compromise my son & I came to. I believe in a"happy medium". I wasn't too fond of the Mohawk, but he really wanted one. He is 13 & at the point of finding his own identity, so I made a deal with him. I him to Google the hair cuts & find one we both are ok with. I also told him since he was still young, let's start with just highlighting the ends first. We are both pretty satisfied with the compromise.
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8 Votes
I believe this is an absolute personal decision based upon the parent's feelings regarding hair dye as well as the relationship and maturity of the child - not to mention the reasoning for the child wanting to dye his or her hair in the first place. If a child is brunette and wants to be blonde and beautiful, for example, I would personally make them wait until they are 14 or 15 - changing yourself to 'be beautiful' is never really acceptable. At such a young age, we should be helping our children learn that they are beautiful and to find the positive aspects of themselves rather than helping them change them. As an eco-friendly mom, I'm also fairly against using chemicals on my child's head. I say 'fairly' because I actually do dye my hair (back to it's former bright shade, as it grows in a darker auburn now) and I am not a 'do as I say, not as I do' type of person.
That being said, if the child simply wants to dye their hair for the fun of it - spirit day or bright streaks for the summer, etc. - there are many healthy stains available that can be used in place of hair dye. My daughter went through a phase where she loved pink so much she even wanted pink hair, so I allowed her to have a pink streak on each side of her face. The 'dye' was natural, but lasted 6-8 weeks, and was in a location where it could either be seen or covered up. She was ecstatic - her hair matched everything she owned. It was done just for the fun of it. We also naturally lightened her hair this summer using honey and lemon while she was out in the sun. It took her natural shade of dark blonde and brought out her already natural streaks a bit, much like the sun itself can do if you don't mind being in the sun too much.
I pick my battles. Hair is not a battle I'm willing to fight - she can have her hair cut how she likes and I'm accepting of her wanting to play around with the color. So long as she does it in a safe, fun way and not to make herself 'pretty', and doesn't use nasty chemicals in the process, I'm fairly approving.
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Karla - commented on Sep 20, 2012
This is exactly what I was thinking, but I couldnt have said it better! My daughter is 12 and she has friends who do outrageous things just because someone else did it. (dress provocatively, dye hair wild and bold unatural looking colors, and pierce various parts of their bodies, etc.) I dont approve of these things for my daughter, especially for that reasoning. Kids of this age are incapable of knowing what is truly good for them or what may cause them harm. They make decisions impulsively and still need guidance, not being overbearing, just guidance. When we feel it is the right time for our daughter, we will strongly ENCOURAGE beautiful, natural highlights or lowlights that enhance her beauty versus make her look like a clown.
7 Votes
All the negative people on here going on about chemicals are not too smart. WHAT do you think your kid is breathing????????? There are more chemicals taken in one breath from a city than there would be from months of dying hair. LOL
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Brandi - commented on Sep 7, 2012
Agreed! I feel some people like to use that as an excuse.
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Janet - commented on Sep 7, 2012
Besides, most NORMAL kids want to try funky bright cool colours, the ones that are mostly VEGETABLE dye and are not harmful,,,, people need to live a little!!!!!! My daughter is 3 and asked for a pink strip in her hair, OF COURSE she can have a pink strip its only a hair stain!! haha
7 Votes
I feel that a child should be making her own decisions when she decides to dye her hair. In other words, be of age. A 16 year old with dyed hair looks ridiculous in my opinion. I know some moms will disagree with me, but children look best with their natural color and hair dye is toxic. It strips and dries out the hair, and makes it less healthy. Why mess with what God created?
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Michelle - commented on Sep 19, 2012
but why not let them have fun when they can? as I told my daughter, it will become socially unacceptable once you look for work.
6 Votes
I think that kids today grow up too fast, as it is. I wouldn't let my kids dye their har until they were "adults" and able to care and pay for it themselves. If we continue to go on the premise that these types of things are better than others (i.e. tatoos, piercings), then I think we are not doing our jobs as parents and making the tough decisions.
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Jordan - commented on Mar 5, 2013
I payed for the bleach kit and purple a few days ago with my allowence... Is that what you mean? I'm a good girl don't worry...
6 Votes
my girls are 5 and 6 i just dyed their hair....i however didn't strip it like the package suggested........it should stay in for a month or two......they also have washable hair dye..........and the koolaid method works well too
5 Votes
As long as they live in my house, they will not be permitted to dye their hair. The kids are already to grown; hair color, body piercing and tota disregard for adults, etc!!!! Why add insult to injury????
Each house hold is different and therefore should be handled based upon the parent(s) perspective. I just do not think it is a good idea!!!
5 Votes
I got my first highlights when I was fourteen and dyed all my hair when I was 17. I was the one who had to live with the consequences if I didn't like it. I am now 22 and have since dyed my hair a few times (once pink). Likewise, my brothers used to use the colored hair gel when they were children and loved it. My mom always told me that I was beautiful no matter what I did to my outward appearance but it was more important that my inside (the way I behaved and treated others) was beautiful. I applied that to my life. Obviously you need to inform children that people do make snap judgments based you on the way you look and you need to be smart about the decisions to alter your appearance but letting kids have a little fun with coloring their hair is not a bad thing, in my opinion.
4 Votes
I think I'm in the minority here. While our kids (13, 8 & 4) have not asked to do it, we wouldn't allow it until at least high school, and we definitely wouldn't allow any unnatural colors (green, blue, purple, pink, etc). I understand that kids are "finding" themselves, and I agree, hair is just hair. It grows out. But the statement it makes is not one I want my children sending to others. I want them to be happy and shine with their natural beauty and personality. In my opinion, expressing themselves with things like piercings, tattoos and colored hair is not "expressing", it's a scream for attention. I want them to learn that they are perfect exactly they are. Some people will love them for it, and others will pay no mind. One does not need to be noticed by everyone to be important. That doesn't mean I don't think there are plenty of happy, well-rounded, successful people who are tatted-up or have a pink mohawk. But like it or not, people will judge a book by its cover. And green hair is not the cover I want for my children. If they grow up and become a rock star, then they can have green hair. Until then, they will stick to natural colors.
4 Votes
My daughter is 12 and she has friends who do outrageous things just because someone else did it. (dress provocatively, dye hair wild and bold unatural looking colors, and pierce various parts of their bodies, etc.) I dont approve of these things for my daughter, especially for that reasoning. Kids of this age are incapable of knowing what is truly good for them or what may cause them harm. They make decisions impulsively and still need guidance, not being overbearing, just guidance. When we feel it is the right time for our daughter (when she can make choices for herself and explain that she wants to express herself, enhance herself, whatever), we will strongly ENCOURAGE beautiful, natural highlights or lowlights that enhance her beauty versus make her look like a clown. The major point for our household is to think things through before doing them. what are the reasons and why do you want to do it?
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Jordan - commented on Mar 6, 2013
At one point I wanted black and pink hair. Because I saw a picture of a girl with it. I thought the colours looked nice. I wanted to test it so I went black and liked it enough where I forgot about the pink. But what I'm saying is it don't mater where they get the impedance it's about what they say about it in all.
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4 Votes
As the daughter of a cosmetologist I'm probably far more liberal than most. My mother let me start dying my hair when I was 13 and I turned out alright. It's just hair dye, not a tattoo or anything truly permanent.
4 Votes
MY mother would not let me dye mine till i turned 18. I did as soon as I turned 18 and now i wish I never did it .Dying your hair really is not good for it and you learn that when you get older.
3 Votes
i have 2 girls the ages of 11yr old and a 13 going on 14. I've been asked from them if they can color their hair, my answer is no. I told them they don't need it, unless they have gray hair. Which at this point they do not have gray hair. They go to a Catholic school and it seems like that school accepts some of the hair coloring, nail polish and lightly makeup. Now they have the wash on coloring on the hair and I'm still not a fan of any kind of coloring for my girls. I've told them that will just make one look like they are trouble and I know for a fact not all kids are trouble makers. But that's just me. So i told them when you are 18 and out of the house, then you can do whatever you want, cause you are not under my roof.
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Jordan - commented on Mar 6, 2013
I'm trouble. Purple hair has it written right on it. Hormone raged pre-teen who don't talk much sits watches dbz does tawando and sketches anime all day... I'm trouble for people who are annoyed by geeks :D
3 Votes
When they can buy the dye themselves. So not until they can hold down a job and support their own wants in personalizing themselves.
http://www.mommymatter.com
3 Votes
If they are over the age of 12, yep, LET THEM DYE THEIR HAIR! My son had blue hair for Grades 9, 10, and 11. I even helped him with the dying, because he needed a two-process dye (bleach + color) to achieve his various combinations, usually indigo, purple and aqua. In Grade 12 he began to fade it out. He is now at university, ran his own business during the summer and is still thinking of returning to coloured hair! Clearly, he was not harmed by the experience. If your child is determined to do it, help them and assist them to ensure that the color is clear, crisp and attractive. It's hard to start down that road, as a parent, but if you have raised a good child, hair color is a sideshow.
2 Votes
I think once a kid gets to be school age, it would be ok to try temporary color like the streaks. Make sure though that their school has no problem with that and if the school does have rules on color--then let them do their hair during summer or even like spring break.
1 Vote
18
1 Vote
Yes! Let them do it. Now is the only time they wont have someone from HR telling them no. I had to wait till I was 42 and on disability before i could color my hair purple. My mom always said no, then my job, then my husband. It took that long to finally be free and it felt so good!! Let them be free when they are suppossed to be. Before the world comes down and puts restrictions on their lives.
1 Vote
Until we know for sure if hair dyes are safe, let them dye strips which allows them to be creative but not apply the dye to their scalp. Remember, if they have any cuts in their scalps, 1/2 hour of hair dye will be absorbed into their blood stream. When you breathe dye fumes, air is filtered of toxins in the lungs but if it enters through a cut, well it is in circulation immediately!
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Corrinne - commented on Sep 16, 2012
All of what you said might have been slightly true about 50 years ago. There have been many changes in hair color chemicals since then.
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Jodie - commented on Sep 26, 2012
I know a 12 year old who burnt the top of her scalp (with hair dye) so badly - her hair will never grow back! Don't forget they are chemicals.
1 Vote
My daughter is 10 and has dark brown hair and she badly wants to dye it with pink highlights, and while i think it would be an awesome idea cause i believe they should be able to express themselves this would require her hair to be stripped down first and that i am not ok with...when she starts high school and can be responsible for it then i say go for it!
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Eleanor - commented on Sep 19, 2012
My daughter is also 10, and although I wasn't sure of it at first, my husband and I decided it's not a permanent thing. She had been wanting her hair dip dyed, (where only the bottom few inches are dyed). I took her to the hairdressers today, and must admit it's beautiful. She has fair hair and has red violet colour around the bottom 3 - 4 inches. It will fade in about eight weeks, or can easily be cut out.
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Barbi - commented on Sep 26, 2012
My daughter has dark brown hair and i frosted it bright red...you don't have to strip it first i didn't do hers (she is 6) and a month later it is still in when i condition her hair it gets brighter and hasn't faded at all and i skipped the stripping step and just left the gel dye in for 25 minutes didn't damage her hair and she got her streaks that she wanted
0 Votes
Well my mother has been a hairstylist for about 25yrs. I was 13 when she first dyed my hair. But I believe it's up to the parent if they think they are ready for there child to color there hair. That's just my opinion.
0 Votes
Prob. Not until he/or she was 16.
0 Votes
yes you can let a kid dye their hair
0 Votes
I think it just depends on what your child would like to do with their hair. That being said I don't believe a 5 year old knows what they want to do with thier hair. My son (11) is only allowed to have a mow-hawk and color his hair durring summer vacation. I personally never colored my hair until I was 23 years old. I would have to say I have no intention on letting any of my daughters color their hair until I believe they are old enough and mature enough to make that desision.
0 Votes
Well after reading so many say "it's fun" "why not?" "it grows back" etc, I am really not surprised. Our society seems to be forgetting that we are not supposed to be best friend's with our kids, we are supposed to be their parents. I'm not sure why so many think it's great to allow young kids the chance to dye their hair, but the reality is by giving in to every little whim that your kids have, you will find that you have lost control when they are older. I have friends who are now in the position of "omg, I can't WAIT until my kid is out of the house….he/she is driving me crazy!" I am a mom of 3 boys…all three make me proud. They are respectful, intelligent, fun to be around, social…and none of them ever even asked to do something weird to their hair. They are very involved in sports, yet they never asked to dye their hair a goofy color. I have a friend who's daughter decided about 4 years ago to dye her hair pink on one side, and black on the other. I'm sure some of you would think "wow, good for her" but the reality is she is treated differently by the kids at school. It is a choice she made…but you can't expect everyone to think that outward appearances don't matter. It may be unfortunate, but they DO MATTER. And more importantly, showing respect goes a LONG way. So for those who think that dying their hair all sorts of weird colors is cool, I will continue to believe that highlights are okay, but dying it an outrageous color is just a shout out to say that you a person "dying" for attention.
0 Votes
Oh I was (and still am inside) a punk in the 80's... I leaped at the chance to dye my girls hair blue! Her brother was born with a natural Mohawk and I kep it cut that way for a couple years. It's the only time in their life that they can do such fun things with their appearance. I said i'd never go all domestic but I would feel rather stupid to dress now the way I did.
0 Votes
i think it depends on the types of dye. Things with ammonia in it(permanent dye) i would say highschool. but semi/demi permanent isnt too big of a deal and can be for fun or to try new colors out
0 Votes
I think it is wrong to allow children to colour their hair it not only exposes them to chemicals of that nature unnecessarily at a young age but sends them strong messages that they need to artificially change their looks to fit in, be excepted or feel beautiful! They are beautiful the way they are and their hair is shiny and healthy till they are allowed to colour it. I have three girls and I have told them all while they are under my care I intend to look out for their best interest the best way I can. Once they are 18 and responsible for themselves they can make their own life choices.
0 Votes
I let my daughter get colored highlights, maybe 6 foils or so in Kindergarten, she is now is 4th grade and has had purple, blue and some blonde highlights this last summer. It'll grow out and its fun for her!! I say go for it
0 Votes
18-after hs graduation, and they can pay for it on their own.
0 Votes
I say 16 is a good age for your child to dye there hair.
0 Votes
Oh WOW!! I'am going through this right now. My daughter and I talked about this just last night. I am in no rush for her to grow up soo fast. So I took her to Sally's and my local beauty supply store and let her pick out some clip on hair pieces in any color she wanted. Today she has a cute body wrap with a blonde bang. She loves it and her father did not have a heart attack!!! By the way she is 12... I feel 12 is too young for hair dye. At 16 she can go bold for I care!! lol
0 Votes
My daughter is 12 and I've been coloring her hair with Manic Panic for two years now. She is an artistic kid with a penchant for fashion, so her hair color is just a natural progression in the expression of her creativity. As another mom posted, you have to pick your battles. If I can swap some Flamingo Pink hair for good grades and a clean(ish) room, I'm all over it!
0 Votes
THey make the best washable colors now. I get the ones that you put on with a mascara type wand. it washed out the next time they washed their hair. I even use it! I think that they should wait to dye their hair til they are older but you as a parent are more than capable of making your own decision. My daughter has beatitful blonde hair and she puts the streaks in it.
0 Votes
i dyed an my hair when i was in 5th grade (2 years ago). it was down to my ribs and i also cut it to my shoulders, too. i have dark hair and only got 2 blonde streaks. i thought it looked great and it boosted my self esteem. about half a year later, i re-cut my hair up to my ears. now its been two years, and my hair is again shoulder length. and my streaks are only 4 inches now(i dyed it an inch away from my roots). you can barely even notice it! its not a big deal. also, i suggest dip dying it! there are tutorials on YouTube. its when you only dye the ends colorful and it looks great! usually, the people in the tutorials are blonde. if your child has dark air, bleach the ends and then dye them. it makes it easier. you can also snip it off if you need to.
0 Votes
I have 3 kids, 18 year old son, 16 year old daughter and an 11 year old son. All 3 of them have experimented with dying their hair. Well I did the coloring for them. My daughter started when she was 11. She does wild colors that fit her personality. Her hair is very well taken care of and very healthy. If you are looking into funky or bright colors that the child wants... You can use a deposit only color. Like Manic panic, Raw, Special effects or even Beyond the Zone. These colors work perfect on light brown to blonde hair. It fades out with washing and doesnt do damage to their hair... You have to pick and choose your battles... It is only hair...
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