PLEASE can somebody HELP? 3 year old wont eat!

Brandi - posted on 09/03/2012

All I can say is vitamins and pedia sure to make sure he gets what he needs

Ivy - posted on 08/25/2012

Try not making a big deal about it otherwise he could see this as a challenge to kept it up for the attention. I make my daughter try at least one bite of everything shes unsure of before she can say she doesn't like it or want to eat it. I always put a small bit on her plate to try. 



Modelling behaviour you want him to have is the best way to get him to eat healthier. This how I encouraged my daughter to eat fresh spinach and steamed broccoli. It takes several attempts to get them to decide if they really don't like it or if they were just getting use to it. It can take up to 15 tastings before they definitely know during different meals. 



By not providing snacks and meals that are less than healthy is helpful. Processed food and sugar causes bad behaviour if there is no nutrient rich foods as well.



Homemade oven chips taste much better than any store bought variety.  There are extra virgin olive oil sprays that help make great oven chips without all the added unhealthy fats, salts, and chemicals. Also, he may like carrots and parsnips cut as chips and cooked in the oven. 



My daughter was the same about water till I refused to give anything other than milk or water. When she cried because she thirsty, I said to her she has water in her cup. If she wanted milk, I would get her that. Now that she drinks water, I let her have watered down juice once a day. Otherwise it's water or milk. 



As he is happy to eat bread, try switching to a half and half or wholegrain as that's better for him. My daughter eats wholegrain with seeds, but not poppy seeds. I put butter, jam, or cheese spread on it. (she doesn't like nut butter.) I have no problem with the butter or jam as she eats her vegetable when she has that as her lunch. 



When he asks for a snack, offer fruit or vegetables (carrots, celery, cucumber, quartered plum or cherry tomatoes). My daughter also eats cheese sticks (mild cheddar cut into sticks from our cheese block), almonds, and yogurt. 



Another part of the problem is that he may feel he isn't getting a choice in the food he is eating, so he sticks to what he likes. I let my daughter pick from two or three things. If she wants something else, if it's healthy for her then I usually say. She chooses between the choices I give her as well as making healthy choices for herself. She already eats healthy although she doesn't like eating much meat. She does occasionally have chicken nuggets, only real chicken breast meat, fish sticks, and sausage. She hates beef and doesn't like pork besides the sausages. 



I use to take her mash potato and put in half of her veg and meat so she would eat it. But that was when she was a baby. Maybe if you let him mix his veg with his mash, then he may be more likely to eat it. Or maybe he might like bake potato with butter or sour cream. 



Keep persevering and he will get the message.  

Tanya - posted on 08/21/2012

Try Rice pudding with Raisins..Get him to help you make fun foods. Happy face sandwiches., his own pizza etc. My son was terrible at eating all kinds of foods. Only peanutbutter sandwiches. And now he survived and he is 35yrs old and now he finally likes SALADS..!!
Do not have cookies and bad stuff in the house. Make milkshakes out of all sorts of fruits etc and make things from scratch ..they always taste better..!!! Good luck.

Renee - posted on 08/19/2012

Will he drink juice? I have a breville juicer. I toss in apples, oranges peel and all. THEN... I toss in a few spinach leaves... A few carrots... Mix all the juice together and hand it over in a colored cup... Gone with out a sniffle! I also take the fruit pulp left, mix it in a blender with a bananna and just a bit of juice... Pour it into popcicle molds... They get devoured too. Blend in a bananna in his yougart. I dont know what super noodles are but if he will eat spagettios, veggie pulp in tomato sauce is rarely identified. Carrot juice in chkn noodle soup is rarely noticed either.

My pediatrician told me a long time ago. 1 kids wont starve themselves. 2 their nutrient absorption is soooo much higher than adults that they will get what the need. 3. Too much protein hurts kidneys.

Last resort... Gummy vitamin daily and dont worry. If he looks healthy and eats " something" its all good.

You know... If the cookies, chocolate, etc. arent in the house how can he eat them? Sooner or later he will take the choice of apple or orange if no choice of cookie is present... You buy the food and bring it home. If you only bring home good stuff...he will not starve...throw an everlovin, roof raising, full on mad on for a few days...yes...but he will not starve himself. I have 4 kids and 2 are picky as you describe. I make 1 trip to the grocer a week. I get a few junk things and the rest healthy. When the junk is gone...its gone. And it goes quick of course... Then...nothing lrft but good stuff. I hear a lot of bellyaching about no food in the house but..". I tell them my house my budget, my trip to grocery, my decision. Theres an apple and last i checked, the usda considers that food. If u are hungry...eat the apple..." trust me when i say that it is a hard long battle. One just must be willing to fight it.

Shanna - posted on 08/07/2012

My son is very picky too and just last night i was cutting up a little meat for his plate(which Is the hardest thing to get him to eat) and I didn't really pay any attention to the fact that i was cutting them into shapes, which is something he is learning about and pretty familiar with. Well He yells out square....rectangle....and he's all excited, so I went right along with him and tried to encourage his interest. It worked like a charm...he ate all his meat and wanted more. Then when it came to the corn(which I usually dont have a problem getting him to eat; howver this time I had over cooked it and it was mushy!) I simply identified it a "Little yellow squares"...and gulp...down the hatch went the corn !!!!!!!!! Also I would suggest letters and numbers or using cookie cutters for shapes or u can just cut the food into smaller shapes yourself if u want. Around this age is when a lot of kids are learning letters of the alphabet, numbers, colors and shapes.....so try to make meals fun and interesting to them....whatever is most appealing to them. Good Luck....I really think I've hit the jackpot here this time.

Natasa - posted on 10/30/2011

Hi, My son is turning 3 and he is also very picky. I give him apple sauce in the morning and add in liquid multi vitamins and to his cereal (baby cereal which is iron fortified) I add in 1 teaspoon of ground flax seed and a scoop of powdered whey ISO protein. It's his best meal of the day. He also loves plain yogurt for lunch and to that I add 1/2 a teaspoon of lemon flavored fish oil. The only other foods he will eat are bananas, melon, cheese pizza, bread, crackers, corn on the cob, apples and that is it. It is frustrating that he won't touch anything else but at least I know he is getting some vitamins and what he does eat is healthy. No juice, cookies, or sugar.
Good luck! I know how frustrating and worrisome it is.

Ruth - posted on 01/23/2009

Yeah, there must be something to that, Mandy. I swear my son eats better around his friends too. And sensing stress . . . yeah, both kids and animals do that and feed on it, unfortunately.

Mandy - posted on 01/23/2009

Those cookbooks are great..my daughter has always been a great eater, right now she is 14 months and getting 4 molars and 4 eye teeth...so she is in pain and refuses to eat most things...I give her a bottle and leave it at that..I agree when she is hungry she will eat..however with that said she started daycare and she apparently eats EVERYTHING while she is there...so I wonder if she sees the other kids eating she east?? or when she is at home with me she is playing with me for attention....I think you need to go with your gut if you feel there is something wrong mentally where he feels he may get sick then deal with it and in the meal time try not to stress as it could be something as simple as him sensing your stress....hang in there xo

Jen - posted on 01/23/2009

Have you tried the cookbooks The Sneaky Chef or Deceptively Delicious? They hide healthy food (via means of pureed veggies and fruits) in food kids like, such as mac & cheese. The recipes are really good, even my hubby likes them!

Leonie - posted on 01/23/2009

Very well done, I actually have goose bumps I am that excited for you.

Hope all goes well for you and your son  All the best. XO

Michele - posted on 01/23/2009

My son is 3 and is a very picky eater, my pediatrician said as long as he is growing at each visit, to not force him. He loves yogurt and juice, all carbs really. Oh yes he definitely has a sweet tooth too, good luck.

Emma - posted on 01/23/2009

my son is also 3 and going thourgh the same thing our hv told us to let me eat little but offen he now eats other thing we just mixed it in with wat he does eat like mash we would mix in a bit of veg like cauliflower as he cant see it he is still really fuss but it does get better as they get older cause my son who is now 8 was like he brothers but now he will eat anything as long as he is eating something our hv said its ok

hope this helps

Ruth - posted on 01/23/2009

Oh, hooray! I did forget to tell you that some of the best advice I read when struggling to feed my own toddler was that you should force the kid to try everything but not force him/her to eat all of anything they don't like. Sounds like you're doing just right. :)

Alana - posted on 01/23/2009

hello again it seems that not letting him move from his table until he has tried his food is starting to work, i dont force him to eat everything on his plate, i have resorted to letting him try one bite and if he doesnt like it, he doesnt have to eat it. in the past couple of days my son has tried scrambled egg, beef burgers, sosage, pineapple, kiwi,and fish fingers with peas and sweetcorn hidden inside! i just wanted to say thankyou to everyone for your suggestions you have been a great help! x

Leonie - posted on 01/23/2009

Hi Alana,

Kids are about the most stressful, scarry thing that can happen to a person. 

Woo Hoo on the chicken nuggets frontier. congrats. There is actually a great reecipe in deceptively delicious for hiding vegies in home made chicken nuggets. I  know lots of people other have recommended it as well but I can't begin to express just how good it is.  Even down to hiding pureed pumpkin (I think???) in plain looking pasta.

I really feel for you, I see people, including myself, who keep saying don't worry he'll eat when he's hungry", but as a mother this isn't always as easy as it sounds. In the end sometimes you do just have to do what ever it takes and hope that later in life when you can rationalises with him, then try to get him to try other foods.

Also try giving him a kids multi vitamin "Special lolly " if  you are really concerned about his nutrition intake.

I hope something eventually works. XO

Karina - posted on 01/22/2009

hello again alana, the book mentioned in my previous post (deceptivly delicious by jessica seinfeld), i live in australia and i know it is available here.

i actually got mine from amazon.com which is an american website that you can go to to order books, cd's etc.

i love the website because i love cooking and i always find an interesting cookbook on there.

maybe you could also ask your local bookshop. it's an old fashioned looking book with pink and green cover.

hope you find it.

kind regards, karina (australia)

Buffy - posted on 01/22/2009

I think three days was likely your breaking point, and not your son's. As long as your son is healthy, you can very likely allow him to refuse food for more than three days. Of course, I'm not a doctor or an expert, and you may want to keep your doctor updated. My brother actually ate nothing but PB&J for weeks at a time. But every now and then, he would decide to eat dinner with us. My mother didn't ever worry about it, and never even mentioned it other than joke that he was going to grow peanuts out his ears. No stress about it, though. And he's a healthy adult who eats nearly everything now. I think it's a stage that might be stressing you more than him. I hope you find success with some of the ideas presented.

Jeannine - posted on 01/22/2009

You can probably get it in the uk- if not, you can order it from www.amazon.com & they ship to the uk. hope this helps! this cookbook is amazing!

Michelle-Lynne - posted on 01/22/2009

When I was a kid I would never eat my mom took me to doctors all the time. What got me to eat was making dinner FUN!! ask your son to help you with dinner, ask what he wasnts to eat. I loved pancake fridays when I was a kid My mom would make really thin pancakes and we would put fresh fruit and whiped cream on them and sit and watch tv and eat. or use cookie cutters to cut shapes into the food. and ya ask him what he wants and see if he wants to cook he might be 3 but I bet with your help you two would have a fun time and really get to spen time together.

Buffy - posted on 01/22/2009

I'm not an expert! But I have some suggestions. First, stop stressing about it. Most kids will eat when they need food. Get the unhealthy foods out of the house, and only allow them on occasion. Don't use food as punishment or reward, and don't save one meal to be eaten at another mealtime. Provide an alternative to what you're offering for a meal - like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Don't change up this alternative, or you'll just find yourself becoming a short order cook. It can be anything you know your son will eat that is also good for him. Offer the meal you're eating or the alternative to him at every mealtime. You may see him eating it for six months. While you may wonder how he can possibly stand it every day, don't worry about it, as you know he's getting some nutrition from it. Give him his food on a plate that is larger than his portions. Smaller plates make it look like a lot of food and can be overwhelming, while the same amount of food (and make sure to keep the portions reasonably small) will look much more achievable on a larger plate. Keep plenty of space between foods. And then just be mellow about it. Unless he's actually harming himself and you need medical intervention, he will likely get what his body needs, and you'll find that this is just another frustrating stage that he will eventually outgrow. Good luck!

Ashley - posted on 01/22/2009

I know you've gotten lots of replies, and I didn't read them all, but here's an idea. There are all kinds of ways to be sneaky. There's even a book called, The Sneaky Chef. She puts spinach in brownines and stuff like that. Check it out. You can cut fruit in fun star shapes, etc.  Just keep trying and you'll find foods that he likes. My kids are kinda picky too and I know what the other moms on here are saying is probably true, that they should eat what you give them, but I know that I want to eat what I choose, so why not let my kids choose too. I make them eat two or three "no thank you bites." If they say, "no, thank you to broccolli, " I put 2-3 bites on their plate and they have to eat those bites. Hope it helps.

Alana - posted on 01/22/2009

Quoting Leonie:

I read this post after I posted my own, unfortunately this could be a real problem. Always go with your gut, if the doctor tells you to stop being silly etc but you are still concerned go see someone else and so on until you do feel comfortable. A mother knows their child best.

yes of course i will do the amount of times i av asked my health visitor and she has given me sooooooo many tips that just do not work! although, i have got my little un to try some chicken nuggets this week i know its not the most healthy of food but atleast he is starting to eat someting! xxx

Leonie - posted on 01/21/2009

I read this post after I posted my own, unfortunately this could be a real problem. Always go with your gut, if the doctor tells you to stop being silly etc but you are still concerned go see someone else and so on until you do feel comfortable. A mother knows their child best.

Alana - posted on 01/21/2009

Quoting Ruth:

I would seriously try to get a nutritionist, food/speech therapist, or other professional involved. My MIL's oldest (not my husband) had almost the exact same thing happen: terrible stomach flu at 9 months and refusal to eat anything afterward. Her pediatrician told her her son would not starve himself, that he would eat if he had to, but he didn't. He is now 29 years old and will only eat a short list of very bland foods: plain spaghetti with butter and parmesan, pancakes, rolls, bacon, tortillas with cheese. There may be a few more, but that's basically it. My MIL firmly believes that if he had had true therapy to deal with his fear of getting violently ill again, he might have gotten past it. Now it's too late. Some kids are picky. I don't think that's your son's problem.

 

Anyway, that's my two cents.

thankyou for showing your concern atlast someone who doesnt just think he is picky eater! it is actually as if he is scared to eat and try new things its awful! I am goin to visit the health visitor again soon so i will see what she says, thanks again for understanding. x

Leonie - posted on 01/20/2009

Hi honey,

Try adding pureed fruit into his yoghurt and making french toast with small amounts of pureed veg in the egg. Jessica Seinfeld (Jerry Seinfeld's wife) wrote a fantastic recipe book  showing how to disguise healthy foods in the foods kids like to eat (even veggies in cake, biscuits and desserts) I strongly recommend it.

All the best, be patient sometimes you also just need to say "no, you can't eat all that junk." trust me when he's hungry enough he will eat.

Ruth - posted on 01/20/2009

I would seriously try to get a nutritionist, food/speech therapist, or other professional involved. My MIL's oldest (not my husband) had almost the exact same thing happen: terrible stomach flu at 9 months and refusal to eat anything afterward. Her pediatrician told her her son would not starve himself, that he would eat if he had to, but he didn't. He is now 29 years old and will only eat a short list of very bland foods: plain spaghetti with butter and parmesan, pancakes, rolls, bacon, tortillas with cheese. There may be a few more, but that's basically it. My MIL firmly believes that if he had had true therapy to deal with his fear of getting violently ill again, he might have gotten past it. Now it's too late. Some kids are picky. I don't think that's your son's problem.

Anyway, that's my two cents.

Emily - posted on 01/15/2009

my little girl went though a stage where she wouldnt eat what i gave her, the only thing that work for me was only putting 1 thing that she liked on the plate ( for us it was chicken) and then i would put somthing like potatoes (mashed or boiled)  and broccoli or another vegon the plate too. She always ate the chicken and would look at the veg and potatoes and didnt want any more. i know the next bit sound a bit cruel but honestly the health visitor i spoke to said it was ok. i would let her walk away and not eat any more but she got to the point after a couple of days where she was really hungry and ate the potatos and veg as well from then its been great. I know its hard as we had got to our wits end but it does get better.... take it from some 1 who's been there my little girl is 3 and 3 months now.

Jessie - posted on 01/15/2009

try whie rice if he eats that shred up some chic breastand mix it in the upgrade to a low taste vegie like green bean  mixed in . You could also start with  noodles as a base.  My sone was the same way now he loves chic rice and green beans with cream of mushroom soup, And make sure he gets to eat with mom and dad, Sometimes wanting to be like everyone else sparks an appitite.  

Alana - posted on 01/14/2009

Quoting Karina:

i am having the same trouble with my three year old...i have cooked things, made faces out of sandwiches, called things funny names.....nothing has made him eat!
now, after getting tired of cooking him different things, if he doesnt eat what we are having, he will go to bed hungry, it may sound harsh but if he knows he can get what he wants, he wont try anything new.
i bought jessica seinfelds book...deceptively delicious...it's about hiding pureed vegies in other foods and it has worked for a few things.
i found if there were other "good eaters" around such as cousins or friends, he would eat a bit more and at least try something different.
the other mums are right, he wont starve, but you have to be firm with him....in the end it is for his own good.
hope this helps, karina.

is this book available in the uk? x

Jeannine - posted on 01/13/2009

I have that cookbook as well and most of the recipes I have tried have been good. The sweet potato grilled cheese sandwiches are so easy & better than any regular grilled cheese I have ever had! Just make sure as it says in the book to still offer veggies as a side dish so they know that they have to eat them still. :)

Karina - posted on 01/13/2009

i am having the same trouble with my three year old...i have cooked things, made faces out of sandwiches, called things funny names.....nothing has made him eat!

now, after getting tired of cooking him different things, if he doesnt eat what we are having, he will go to bed hungry, it may sound harsh but if he knows he can get what he wants, he wont try anything new.

i bought jessica seinfelds book...deceptively delicious...it's about hiding pureed vegies in other foods and it has worked for a few things.

i found if there were other "good eaters" around such as cousins or friends, he would eat a bit more and at least try something different.

the other mums are right, he wont starve, but you have to be firm with him....in the end it is for his own good.

hope this helps, karina.

Alana - posted on 01/13/2009

Quoting Cynthia:

I don't know if this will help, but you could try involving your child in the preparation of a new meal.  When I'm going to introduce a new veggie or fruit or even recipe, I'll often involve the kids, and they like participating so much that they'd be willing to do just about anything to get to "cook".... even if it means trying something new.  Take your little guy shopping and let him help you pick out some fresh veggies - you can let him tap mellons and squeeze peppers and the like.  Then at home, let him stand on a chair at the counter with you and wash the veggies and fruit and the chop them with a butter knife.  He can taste as he goes, or wait for the finished product at dinner... And you can let him know that this is how all the really great cooks make great food.  I've found that even when a meal turns out only passably good, my sons will still eat it because they're so proud to share it with their dad and me.  Fruit salad might be a fun one to start with because of the sweetness...

 

As for what he will eat, I'd say just don't buy any of it for a while.  If my guy wants candy and I say there isn't any and offer yogurt, I may not be popular for a few minutes, but if he's really hungry he'll come back for the yogurt!  Children learn what they live, so set the example by not making chips/chocolate and biscuits a part of your day.

 

Try not worry.  He will eat when he's hungry!  ...and he may even surprise you in the end!  Best of luck!

thankyou im going shopping today so i will give it a go!

Cynthia - posted on 01/12/2009

I don't know if this will help, but you could try involving your child in the preparation of a new meal.  When I'm going to introduce a new veggie or fruit or even recipe, I'll often involve the kids, and they like participating so much that they'd be willing to do just about anything to get to "cook".... even if it means trying something new.  Take your little guy shopping and let him help you pick out some fresh veggies - you can let him tap mellons and squeeze peppers and the like.  Then at home, let him stand on a chair at the counter with you and wash the veggies and fruit and the chop them with a butter knife.  He can taste as he goes, or wait for the finished product at dinner... And you can let him know that this is how all the really great cooks make great food.  I've found that even when a meal turns out only passably good, my sons will still eat it because they're so proud to share it with their dad and me.  Fruit salad might be a fun one to start with because of the sweetness...

As for what he will eat, I'd say just don't buy any of it for a while.  If my guy wants candy and I say there isn't any and offer yogurt, I may not be popular for a few minutes, but if he's really hungry he'll come back for the yogurt!  Children learn what they live, so set the example by not making chips/chocolate and biscuits a part of your day.

Try not worry.  He will eat when he's hungry!  ...and he may even surprise you in the end!  Best of luck!

Leanne - posted on 01/12/2009

I agree with Jeannine, I went the same route with one of my kids. And the ped. told me the same thing. And it worked for my kid as well. When they are hungry they will eat, alot of times it is not that they dont like the food or dont like trying new things, it could be as simple as color and tecture. Still to this day my youngest will only eat raw veggies with dip. And he is almost 14 lol But I dont question it as long as he is eating it. He even puts ketchup on rice!! lol

Jeannine - posted on 01/12/2009

My pediatrician told me that my child wouldnt starve- and I know Im not a short order cook. My kids get whatever my husband and I are eating- If they don't eat, they don't eat! Simple as that. My daughter went 4 days without eating lunch or dinner (she has always been a good breakfast eater). I called my pediatrician & she said that she would eat when she was hungry. Sure enough, on the 5th day, she ate chicken, broccolli and a few roasted potatoes. I was shocked. She occasionally will go on food strike still, but does suprise us and randomly picks nights to eat. She is very healthy and is developmentally above other kids her age. Another trick I have heard is to set the table but don't put anything on the childs plate. You and your spouse should continue eating/conversing- but ignore the child. Eventually they will show interest and ask for food- you can put small amounts of food on their plate that they ask for. (this method was on the show The Doctors & a few of my friends swear by it)

Melissa - posted on 01/12/2009

try using tooth picks; put pieces of cheese, fruit etc and tell him he can only use his tooth pick to eat!  Also I used to tell my little guy that broccli would give him big muscles like his daddy and when he took a bite i would measure his muscles and say with excitment oh my goodness your muscles are growing!

Alana - posted on 01/12/2009

Quoting Jennifer:

My daughter was very picky when she was young, she is 9 now. I got sick of making her an entirely different meal - so I started making dinner for hubby and me and I always include one item she would eat. Then serve the plate with a spoonful of each item and place it in front of him. NO SNACKING BETWEEN MEALS!!! As long as you offer 3 meals a day and maybe 2 healthy snacks - fruit, veggies or cheese he WILL eventually be hungry and eat. Also nothing to drink between meals but water - my kids don't get juice or anything like that. The hard part is on you - DO NOT GIVE IN and give him junk between meals. My kids know that if they want a treat they need to eat a piece of fruit first so their tummy gets full of healthy food and the junk is just a small treat not a whoile meal.   Good luck it is hard my daughter 'worked' me for about 4 years before we butted heads. Take heart she is now a wonderful eater and will try almost anything.

 

Jen A

thankyou very much for the advice but my son wont drink water last time i tried to get him to have nothing but wqter he blatantly refused to drink it and ended up gettin a bit dehydrated. and when i tried the," when hes hungry he'll eat" technique he starved himself for three days!

Thanks again and i will try making meals for us all with the same things and one thing on it he likes as you sugested but as i said before he will only eat bread chips and supernoodles lol. in the past when i have tried to do this he eats the thing he likes and leaves everything else.he wont even try it or even put it near his mouth! i will give it a go again though, fingers crossed! X thanks again. x

Jennifer - posted on 01/12/2009

My daughter was very picky when she was young, she is 9 now. I got sick of making her an entirely different meal - so I started making dinner for hubby and me and I always include one item she would eat. Then serve the plate with a spoonful of each item and place it in front of him. NO SNACKING BETWEEN MEALS!!! As long as you offer 3 meals a day and maybe 2 healthy snacks - fruit, veggies or cheese he WILL eventually be hungry and eat. Also nothing to drink between meals but water - my kids don't get juice or anything like that. The hard part is on you - DO NOT GIVE IN and give him junk between meals. My kids know that if they want a treat they need to eat a piece of fruit first so their tummy gets full of healthy food and the junk is just a small treat not a whoile meal.   Good luck it is hard my daughter 'worked' me for about 4 years before we butted heads. Take heart she is now a wonderful eater and will try almost anything.

Jen A