Do your children see you in your birthdaysuit?

Liz - posted on 09/29/2011 ( 91 moms have responded )

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Hi moms

I know this is a well discussed subject but i just wanted to add my spin,

I was chatting to a friend from work the other day and was really shocked by her reaction when she found out i still undressed in front of my children. I have a 5 yr old boy and a 6 yr old girl and i have always been very open with them when it came to the subject of nudity. I don't parade around the house in the nude.lol but they do see me nude in them everyday situations such as changing clothes, getting ready at the pool etc. I think it is healthy at a young age for them to see the human body and is a perfect time to answer them awkward body questions. My son knows that mom has different parts to him and the correct names for things and his sister vise versa. I know as they get older this will change but at the min i really don't see it a big issue. Life would be a whole lot harder in our small house if we were all worried about being nude in front of each other.

Would really like your views on the subject and what you do in your family.

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Senobia - posted on 10/01/2011

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I just had this discussion a few days ago.I. come from.a household where my Mom was very open and never hid from us,so I am also very open.I believe that the children decide when they dnt want to see u nude any more.One day they will enter your room after you shower and back out ,saying "MoM!!!!. And,then you will kno.Personally I still leav my door unlocked.My children are 19,17,12,and10.I also believe that thei being expossed to the human body deminised that curiosity that leads them to sneak a peek.If the know what it looks like, it tends not become an obsession once they discover their own bodies.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/31/2011

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Autumn, first of all, I don't raise my children in accordance with any religious texts. 2nd my 7 year old asks and when we're pressed for time I shower with her and when we're at a water park or a community pool I find it a lot SAFER to share a change room with my child than to allow her to change somewhere else. Besides I have a baby as well so it's easier to use the family change rooms at the community pools when I'm with my husband.



The reason I have no problem with nudity is because I'm teaching my daughter that the human body is nothing to be ashamed of and there for in my opinion I'm giving her more power over her body and more cofidence. My mother was molested as a child by an uncle, so it's not like I don't know that it can happen in a family, but I believe that if my daughters can take ownership of their bodies it's less likely to happen.



Maybe it's because I'm a care aide and can desexualize a penis or a vagina because I bathe and shower people who I'm not related to. I don't see or feel dirty or like I'm changing what my husband and I do by allowing my children to see me naked. My 7 year old has watched me nurse her baby sister it's really no different.



When my children are getting odd about taking a shower or changing with mommy (my DH is my older daughter's step dad and he tries not to let her see him naked) then I'll stop. But if you feel that allowing your child to see you naked when they're still young enough for you to go into a public washroom with them is something to feel ashamed of, then you have issues IMO.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/16/2011

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Exactly Lindsay. I take showers with my 7 year old and we're both ok with it. Probably because we've been doing that along with being in the same change room at water parks since she was 4 and wanted to start going to them. I'll probably do the same with my 7 month old until they decide they don't want to do that any more.

[deleted account]

Nudity is a non-issue in our home. We don't make it a big deal, so there isn't a problem if my son sees my getting out of the shower or getting dressed. I tend to get ready for work in just panties, and sometimes he walks through the bathroom. Although my son is only 6 1/2 now, he blazes through the house naked! But the funny thing is every now and then HE wants privacy. And last week, hubby & I caught him in the mirror checking for armpit hair!

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Sylvia - posted on 11/26/2011

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Christina, seeing your parents walk by with no clothes on is a LOT different from watching TV shows with nudity, since "nudity" on TV usually means either graphic violence of some kind, explicit sex, or, like, scenes set in a strip club or something. *Totally* not the same.

A lot of people have psychological issues around nudity (not to mention sex). That doesn't mean we should pass our issues on to our children :P

Sherri - posted on 11/26/2011

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Yup sorry for marking your post funny Christina but you can't be serious so it must be a joke.

My 14, 13 and 5yr old still see myself and my husband naked quite often. I birthed them for crying out loud. Plus my kids share a room so they see each other naked too. Especially with 5 of us and one on the way and only one bathroom. Privacy is just something that is virtually impossible most days.

[deleted account]

Wow Christina, just wow. Yeah, that's pretty much all I can come up w/ to comment on that.

Christina - posted on 11/25/2011

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"Naked people in your house" I disagree! How old are your children?? There id a fine line betwen child abuse and child nurturing..."the body is a beautiful thing" is a load of crap to me you have a responsibility to protect your children against that fine line..after a certain age it is NOT OK to run around naked in your home in front of your children!! Do you let them watch naked women/men on tv too?
I am so upset...backing away from the computer!

Jaime - posted on 11/25/2011

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i think it all depends on the situations/kids ages/sex etc. my son is 4 and sees me in the nude daily when i get undressed or go into the shower..being that he is little i leave the shower door open so obviously he is going to see me. he has asked me questions when seeing my body and i answer them honestly....kids are curious and there is nothing wrong with teaching them about different body parts....i dont think i will feel comfortable being naked in front of him when he is a pre teen and im sure he def wont want to see me naked either lol..how ackward is that??? i think its different with women and their daughters b/c they have the same parts and it s just like getting undressed in a fitting room....i sure as hell dont want my son getting completely naked in front of me when he is older b/c that would just be too weird..i say if you have a child of the opposite sex that you are it is okay to undress in front of them as long for as long as you are required to help them with bathing and dressing..once they are old enough to do that completely independent its prob time to be naked in private

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 11/19/2011

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Damn this is what I get for being on the west coast.

Julie, my 7 year old understands privacy and so does her step dad. He doesn't allow her to see him naked. And by the way, my mom and her sisters were molested by an uncle and there was no nakedness in that family. So I guess your theory is kinda wrong.

Sherri - posted on 11/18/2011

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Just basically going to say the same thing Teresa but you beat me too it. Nudity wasn't the problem Julie your husband was.

Julie - posted on 11/18/2011

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NO!
My ex. saw nothing wrong is the girls seeing him nude ... little did I realize he was grooming them for future molestation!

Julie - posted on 11/18/2011

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You are way behind in teaching them privacy issues... DO IT NOW!
My ex. saw nothing wrong is the girls seeing him nude ... little did I realize he was grooming them for future molestation!

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 11/15/2011

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I don't know what to tell you to do since I have 2 girls. Maybe if she pulls hard enough it will make him keep at least his underwear on :)

Kari - posted on 11/15/2011

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it is.. my 20 mo old isn't quite aware yet of what they are.. so she tries to pull his off.. I dont know what to about that though..

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 11/15/2011

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LOL Kari! My brother went through that stage. It can be pretty funny at times.

Kari - posted on 11/15/2011

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I still dress in front of my kids. (ages 4, 3, and 1 and a half) they all still bath together. There isnt any harm in it. I just let my kids know that noone but them are allowed to touch their parts. My son(4yr old) is going thru a stage where he does NOT like wearing any clothes.. so when we are at home he can do so. But he knows that if someone other than mommy or daddy is here he has to wear clothes. They are just kids, so whats the harm in them seeing our body. They are going to learn about it in school soon enough anyway.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 11/10/2011

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I hear that Sharlene, I nurse in front of my 7 year old.

Sharlene - posted on 11/10/2011

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I do it to darls my children are 8 and 7 yrs old boy and girl . theres nothing wrong with that its your boobs and vagina that they came out of . cheers

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 11/01/2011

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My Dh is my older daughter's step dad so he tries really hard to avoid allowing my older daughter to see him naked because he doesn't want her going around saying that she saw her step daddy's penis and someone getting the wrong idea. She did that after we had to change in the family change room at the community pool where my MIL and her boyfriend live. Luckily she just said it to my MIL and told her she laughed at his penis. But still it's something we try to avoid. From now on DH is changing after the rest of us.

Nikki - posted on 11/01/2011

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As long as your daughter knows that noone is allowed to touch areas that cover her bathing suit...than it is fine if she still enjoys time with you in the bath. She has not gone into puberty yet, and sounds pretty innocent to me! Don't let others make you feel that it is wrong. Your daughter will let you know when she thinks it is no longer appropraite. My daughter is 11 and would still take showers/ baths with me if I let her. But she is already dealing with pueberty and I am teaching her about personal space. Showering with Dad is another story. She is way too old for that..and she never took baths with him. He did however give her baths when she was a baby to about age 4/5.

B Rae - posted on 10/31/2011

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I believe that children need to know the difference. I think it helps you explain were people should not touch them or their friends. Have told my 9 and 3 year old children they should tell someone they trust if someone touches a friend or them in the private parts. That way if they see it happen even if it's not them they will tell someone. And I get changed in front of my kids to. There is nothing wrong with it.

Lindsay "Lindy" - posted on 10/31/2011

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I don't see the harm or problem with my 2 children seeing me naked.

Autumn - posted on 10/31/2011

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Whatever happened to what the bible has to say about nudity. For example, when Adam and Eve had sinned in the garden of Eden they covered themselves. When Noah got drunk his sons walked into the room backwards to cover him up. Personally I showered and walked naked around my children when they were 1. When they started really looking at mommies stuff was quitting time, aka, a year and a half. What are we telling our children?? That nudity is ok??? That what is supposed to be sacred between a MAN and a WOMAN is acceptable for children as well???? I get that when you have kids it's hard to take an uninterrupted shower, but barring everything out there all the time for all to see is different. JMO

Jessica - posted on 10/29/2011

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my son just turned 4. And i truely dont see any issues with this especially right now. He knows we are different and he asks questions and i explain the best that i know how and can. But he takes showers with his dad all the time, he loves to and it doesnt bother him, i dont walk around my house naked, but he constantly will come in the bathroom while i am either showering, or in the tub and it doesnt phase him. people for some reason view this as a sexual thing and it is far from that. its the human body, everyone has one and i dont want my child being uncomfortable when its come to his body or anything. for now i will continue doing what i am doing. i have one bathroom and i am not going to go nuts trying to lock doors and hide incase my 4 year old son walks in. so i think if you are ok with it and the children are ok and not bothered by it then i dont see the problem. when they start getting older and possibly feeling uncomfortable you talk to them and the re-evaluate how things should be. until now i have alot more things to worry about them my little boy walking in while i am getting dressed!

Alecia - posted on 10/28/2011

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We are naked all the time. Boys, girls. Who cares in our house. They think it's weird that people have such a problem with it. We all sleep nude. My kids hate the thought of spending the night out and having to wear pj's. It was how I was raised. If any of the kids asked for something different we would change ASAP. We also NEVER would o that when others were in our home, but that is just common sense in my book.

Nikki - posted on 10/28/2011

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My daughter took showers with me until she was 8. My son walked in on me naked and he is tramatized for life (just kidding) but he remembers to knock now. = )

Juliette - posted on 10/27/2011

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My 7 year old girl & 3 year old son see me in the nude on occasion. I don't make a big deal about it, but my husband is the total opposite to me. He freaks out if he even suspects that my son has seen my underwear...much less my birthday suit. I agree with Liz tho, and as long as you don't throw a hissy fit every time it happens, the kids deal with it as a regular, normal, natural thing.

Luz - posted on 10/26/2011

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There is nothing wrong with that. I don't go around parading in the nude, but I get dressed/undressed in front of my son if he is in the room and he is 7. Please he still runs into the bathroom to tell me something when I'm in the shower and I read to him while he is in the tub.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/26/2011

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Exactly Karen. I'm fine with my 7 year old seeing me naked or nursing her baby sister. But since my husband is my 7 year old's step dad he feels uncomfortable with letting her see him naked and the time we were in the family change room at the community pool proved that he was right not to let her see him naked

Karen - posted on 10/26/2011

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There is not much nudity in our house as it is very male dominated and i grew up not seeing either of my parents naked so i am not really comfortable with my children seeing me naked, i am not saying that any of you are wrong that's just my personal view due to my own upbringing i suppose, we also have a mixture of ages in our home, we have myself, my husband, my 18 yr od son and 20 yr old step-son and 8 yr old triplets (2 sons and a daughter), i also have a 20 yr old daughter who no longer lives at home, i guess we are all different and all have different views so that's why i feel these sites are great if you want an all round difference of opinions

Sylvia - posted on 10/20/2011

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Of course. Duh.

Every family has its own comfort level, and of course living space is a factor too (we have 3 people in an 800-square-foot flat, which is different from having 3 people in a 1500-square-foot 2-storey house). I think the correct age to start avoiding casual nudity is the age when the child's reaction starts to be "Eeeewww! Mooooom!!!!!" That age will differ by family, by gender of child and gender of parent, and a hundred other random factors ...

Christina - posted on 10/19/2011

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My son is 3 and I prefer to cover up in front of him. My daughter is 4 but I will bathe with her. I just prefer to not let my son see me naked just because I think he is too young to know anything about the opposite sex and it's nothing to be ashamed of in fact you're right it is a beautiful thing but I do not let my children see movies that show naked men or women so I would not let my son see me naked and my daughter does not see her dad naked. If my son walks in and I am dressing I do not act ashamed I just get dressed and take my husband aside later and tell him to keep a better eye on my son.
I just prefer that in my house. If I am able to dress in private and to bathe in private that is even better!! Some mom's or dad's do not have that option so I don't think it's a bad thing but then again I am able to control the situation a bit more. If I were a single mom then things would have to be different I wouldnt have the luxury of taking a shower when my husband gets home and etc. But since I do then my son will not see me naked :)
Thanks,
Christina

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/18/2011

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I don't find it odd as long as she's comfortable with it. My 7 year old still likes to shower with me.

Beth - posted on 10/18/2011

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Do you guys think it is ok that my ten year old daughter not only sees me naked but still showers with me occasionally? In fact one of her favorite things remains when on the very occasion I have a bath with her. I've never really thought anything was weird about it, just kinda enjoyed that she wasn't beyond playing with mum in the bath yet but now I'm a little worried.

Lindsay "Lindy" - posted on 10/16/2011

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It is all about being comfortable naked around your kids. If you and your kids are cool with it then there is no problem.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/10/2011

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For me it wasn't the pointing and laughing Saturday. It was the fact that my 7 year old told her step grandma she'd seen her step dad's penis.

If you feel uncomfortable (and my DH does) then you shouldn't get naked in front of your child like Lindsay has said.

Lisa - posted on 10/10/2011

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it good to go nude in front of the kids
it help them understand the diffidence between the mom and dad. also it help them understand the body is nothing to be a shame of

Lindsey - posted on 10/10/2011

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I think if the parent is uncomfortable changing or being naked in front of their children then they shouldn't do it. If the whole point is to teach them that the naked body is nothing to be ashamed of seeing their parents embarrassed will not accomplish that. That being said I will change in front of my children. Most of the time I don't have a choice since they walk in anyways. My husband on the otherhand does not. Shortly after my daughter turned 7 he was no longer comfortable with her seeing his penis. He still changes around the boys but he tends to do even that quickly. She is well aware of the different parts boys and girls have as she has seen him naked before and has 2 younger brothers who change in front of her and used to run around naked. I'm not going to pressure him into doing something for the sake of curiosity. That would be no good for anyone.

Sharon - posted on 10/10/2011

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when my 7 year old step daughter sees me changing she points and my boobs and laughs. So I am wondering if I should make it a point to stop changing in front of her?

Amy - posted on 10/09/2011

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I'd like to know how those moms get privacy, lol. I have a 5 year old and an 18 month old and I swear they have a sensor or alarm on the bathroom door so they know when I'm using it and feel the need to come in. I know they do the same thing with their father. I don't think it's a big deal but if the child or parents are uncomfortable then it's their decision not too.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/09/2011

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My husband and I found out yesturday at the community pool we just can't let my 7 year old see him naked. We were using one of the family change rooms to get our bathing suits on and so it wouldn't be too much of a hassle to get our 7 month old into her bathing suit as well. My 7 year old saw her stepdad's penis and kept staring and laughing at it. That was no big deal. However later she told my MIL that she'd seen Lee (That's what she calls my DH, her stepdad) naked and saw his penis and laughed at it.

Now we're really not a modest family. My 7 year old has seen my dad naked when he forgot the lock the door and her step dad in the shower. She watches her baby sister get changed and we always shared a change room when we go to water parks. However I don't want people to get the wrong idea about my husband. And people will get that if my 7 year old keeps talking about seeing her step dad's penis even though it was in a family change room with me present. It's enough she knows that a boy has a penis and what they use it for. I don't think she needs to see her step dad's penis again.

Karen - posted on 10/08/2011

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My son is 10 - and lemme tell you the kids has NO issues about barging in on me when I am getting dressed or in and out of the shower...if he wants to ask me something because his step-dad said no to something or whatever he just barges in...I also have a 14 month little girl and I am 16 weeks pregnant with our 3rd and last - so my son changes his sisters poopy diapers if my other half isn't here - I cannot stand the smell of it I throw up lol. My son has had all the talks - at home and school...but he does not like when I barge in on him when he is in the shower or something lol - gotta love kids what is good for them isn't good for you to do...but honestly I don't much care it's not a huge concern - we live in a small place with one bathroom...not much I can do lol. It isn't a big deal unless someone makes it a big deal...

LeAnn - posted on 10/08/2011

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I disagree with letting my children see me in complete buff. Sure changing clothes in a different subject but I believe with the same sex only. Children absorb everything and the books are for teaching. We live busy lives, both parents working in most families, we don't want to accedantley give our children the wrong impression of the right time to be in the buff. And/or with who. I am not happy with my memories of my nude parents. Our bodies our space. Talking keeps the open realationship as a family. just saying

Sherri - posted on 10/08/2011

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I read EVERY single one and I still didn't get that you were referring to her. So obviously not as obvious as you thought.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/08/2011

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That's why you should always read the other posts Sherri. I felt it was obvious that I was refering to Lindsay's mistake- especially when my other post pointed out she'd forgotten a word and how it seems to read at the moment.



You weren't clear at all at what you were disagreeing with me about because the other post I'd seen from you was about another member. You'd read-or I thought you had read- my response to that post.



Sidenote- I hate laptops

Sherri - posted on 10/07/2011

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I did read that it had nothing to do with what I was referring too.

Well actually now that I have gone back it seems you were referring to Lindsay but when I first read it, it certainly didn't. You never actually stated that you were specifically speaking to her. I also never jumped on you, I was simply disagreeing with something it seemed that you were referring too.

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