Fighting ADD

Jessica - posted on 04/22/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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ADD not ADHD. There is a big difference of the two, one can be helped with a Mt. Dew. What to do with the other one? My husband and I have seen this in our son since kindergarte. Every teacher every year saying at every parent teacher conference the SAME thing. He takes forever to get work done, he is a smart kid but can never complete assignments. They have seperated him from friends to see if that would help, kept him in from recess to have ample time to complete an assignment, sent home uncompleted work too. These and so much more!

My husband and I have struggled with this for 5 years now. We have finally reached the brink now that he is finishing up the 4th grade. We spend up to 5 hours or more a day from the moment he gets home from school until his bedtime just completing simple homework assignments and a few of uncompleted school assignments. We have to be on top of him constantly to make sure he is staying on task, we've become to familiar with that look/empty gaze in his eye which says "Brendon has left the building".

He works 100 times harder than any other kid I know to get his homework done and to just keep up with where he needs to be. He never gets ahead, all this work just barely keeps him at proficient for his grade.

Its as if the world is foggy to him and he needs a pair of glasses to clear things up. He has to super focus just to try and get what your teaching him, as if he has to slice away at the fog just to get a good look.

If I walked around without my glasses and you held up a can of beans and asked me what you had in your hand... I wouldn't be able to tell you. Its only because i've become familiar with that shape and size could I say it was a canned good of some sort. Its almost because of lots of practice he has been able to do what he can, because its been shown to him ample amounts of time. Now if you get frustrated at me for not being able to answer you and tell you that its a canned good and that it is beans in the can, that is the frustration we try not to portray to our son. Because i can see his frustration of trying to answer the question as well.

His isn't hyperactive. We've never mentioned this at a well checkup with his family practitioner before... how do I bring it up now?! We've been willing to work with it this long but its beginning to become too much. I make the appointment tommorrow, I am nervous... what if they don't see it? We work so hard you would never know if you walked up to him on the street and struck up a conversation. But if we were to miss a day... he would fall lightyears behind! Everyone always says... no, way! Except for his teachers... they've always said the same thing and we've known too but hadn't tried everything yet... but now we are spent... nothing left to try... have to do something

We keep a very strict schedule, but we make sure to schedule down time as well. And there is always a bit of time for friends. School work is always a priority though. But as he goes up in the grades its getting more and more difficult. The amount of info he is supposed to be absorbing is leaving him with less and less time for friends. He doesn't see how they can get their homework done so fast and have so much time to play...

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Josephine - posted on 04/23/2010

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Hello my son is in the 2nd grade at age 7 and will be turning 8 next month in May. He is going to the 3rd grade. My son is being tested for ADHD. At this time he is on a two wk. trail on ritalin to gain his attention to focus more on his class. He too takes so long to complete an assignment or school work. He had sizures at a young age about 5 times. He has speech delay and poor coordination. The school is still working with him in his speech. He has improved with his motor skills with the help from the school and at home. Have him really tested and seek help to help both you and your child. Lots of love, patient and understanding to you and your family. It is a struggle but nothing is worth the try to help our child.

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Michelle - posted on 04/26/2010

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you asked how to approach the dr. it is simple go in and say the school is suggesting that we have our son tested for add the dr.'s know the difference between the two. They will probably want your sons teacher to fill out a questionaire about how he is in class, it isn't a hard process and the sooner he gets diagnosed the sooner they can help you help him.

Jessica - posted on 04/25/2010

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thanks for the feedback, it was helpful. i'm a bit anxious... we take him to the doctor this coming Wednesday. I took him to sylvan learning center to have him tested and paid for a complete diagnostic. They give 3 and 1/2 hours for that complete diagnostic to be done, he didn't finish... it took him just that long to do the English portion. We had to reschedule for next Saturday to do the math portion. I get the results Tuesday for the English he completed so I can take those results to his doctor. He had absolutely no distractions in a room all to himself with a glass door so we can see inside and he was focused the entire time. He just takes SO much time to process ANYTHING! I was so glad they saw it too! I hope the doctor can see it. Sylvan saw how much work I put in just to keep him where he needs to be, they could tell just from watching him test.

Laurie - posted on 04/23/2010

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I've homeschooled for 24 years now and have had a little experience with the challenge of keeping some of my children focused. With one of mine, I just remember dedicated a good part of a week sitting next to him as he worked on school, prompting him to keep moving from one task to the next and hooraying him every time he went from point A to point B without distraction. We would set the timer and daily we strove beat the clock from the day before with the promise that if it was done diligently, we would do something GREAT together-play catch, play a board game, read a book, etc.
I learned that if the task is reading or memorizing, it worked better if these children could be bouncing a ball, squeezing a koosh ball in their hand, hopping on one foot, rolling a golf ball around under their foot...something that was keeping them active, but still able to focus on their work. The ball under the foot or the koosh can be done while writing as well.
After a week, the focus stayed for a few weeks and then we needed to grab another day, do it again and get the focus back where it needed to be. I'm not sure how many of these activities could be used at school, but they sure could help the homework sessions at home.
With writing assignments or reports, try first having your son say the composition out loud or give the book report outloud while it is recorded. Then have him write it out from the recording. Variety of places to work, activities while working, can truly HELP to focus rather than distract.
May God give you wisdom to know how to bless this young man with the skills needed to excel.

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