Having a break down over my 4 year old and his potty accidents. now he has learned to lie about it.

Hope - posted on 11/29/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My son is having accidents at home only, not at pre k. He runs and changes clothes hoping i wont notice.. if i do he lies lately.. I have done everything... even threaten with santa. He is 4

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Angie - posted on 11/29/2010

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This isn't uncommon. Ask any kindergarten teacher and he/she will tell you there is a box of clothes in the classroom or in the office for exactly this purpose. Remember, at school "potty breaks" are scheduled so your son probably never has a full bladder at school. Try doing the same thing at home - schedule times for him to go to the bathroom.

Gina - posted on 11/29/2010

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I agree with Ebony. I know it's so frustrating when a potty trained child has accidents, but try not to let him see your frustration. Act in a completely neutral manner, have him clean himself up, change himself and have him help you clean up any mess on the floor. Again, all in a neutral manner. No getting aggravated and no placating him either. Remind him often to go. Sometimes they are so into what they are doing they don't want to stop. W/ my daughter it usually only takes me offering to 'save' her toys while she goes. Hope this helps

Dee - posted on 11/29/2010

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I'm sorry that you are having an issue that is frustrating for you. Have you had him checked out by his pediatrician for a bladder infection? It might just be coincidence that he has accidents at home only. Maybe he has more liquids, or becomes more enthralled with the activity in his own space.



I know this sounds asy for me, but there are so many kids that have accidents later than 4. Perhaps if you can just let it go (like Ebony mentions), it might resolve.



I remember being the most upset about things that reflected on me as a mom (Why is that kid shrieking in the store? What is worng with his mother!) We have all been there and he will most likely improve. Try potty breaks at the same time as Pre-school. Give snacks and drinks at the same time. See if it helps. Good luck!

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 11/29/2010

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It’s a truth…but not talked about a lot in much older kids…’

A few of my nephews still wet the bed at the ages of 9, 12, 14 years old…that was 7years ago, but other then that they were fine..not mental problems or anything…

I know it can get upsetting cleaning all the stuff that is messed up, but just realize that the bladder sometimes takes a while to mature…you can do some online research :-)

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 11/29/2010

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Maybe tell him, that its ok when he has accidents, and let him know its ok to tell you when he does…he lies because he is very scared of the trouble he will be in, and so you have to try your hardest not to get upset…

You can talk to him and ask him, what do you do at pre k when you have to use the bathroom?
Well how about we try that here at home?, and mommy promises not to get upset when you do have an accident, if you don’t lie to me anymore…
and just be sincere with it and have good eye contact, and give him a hug, and when he does make it to the toilet, give lots of praise to the point of going over board…

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