how do i say you have no daddy??

Sophie - posted on 04/25/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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hi. I'm recently single from youngest lo daddy whom took on my oldest at 2 also. she thinks he is her daddy. now a few months after splitting he is losing interest in her and am thinking the time has come to tell her the truth. shes nearly 5 . I'm worried about resentment towards her younger sister who is 1. and how to present that daddy cant or won't have her for visits now. I want to be honest and am hoping he will support making the transition easier for her but feel he just cant be bothered. help
Her own father is out of the picture as was chased off by now ex

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Amy - posted on 04/25/2013

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I suggest you don't present it as daddy can't have visits with you anymore since he isn't her actual father. My suggestion is that you just be honest with her that when you were together he acted like a father to her but he is not her real father. If she's enrolled in school you can also try and get some guidance from the school psychologist. I would try and reaon with your now ex to see if he can still take her once an awhile, maybe not as often as he takes his bio daughter but he has played a signifigant role in her life up to now.

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Suzi - posted on 05/06/2013

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You don't need to emphasize the fact that he isn't her biological daddy - but you do need to have an honest talk about the realities of relationships and relationship failure (and don't shrink from telling her about how the two-parent nuclear family is neither the norm nor the ideal).

When she was very little I used to tell mine she had a daddy once but he disappeared, but eventually I told her the truth (that I separated from "him" before he was born) - though I've not quite told her the whole truth (that "he" was only ever going to be a one-night stand)

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