How do I stop the hitting insanity!!

Theresa - posted on 08/07/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Help! My 4 year old has been doing well not sitting on the naughty bench at daycare (months!) but in the last few weeks he has gotten back into wrestling, shoving, hitting, and elbowing the other kids. I have talked to him about not touching other people, walking away and counting when he gets mad to calm down, taken away tv, toys, coloring books, and grounded him to his room. Nothing helps!

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Jodi - posted on 08/07/2009

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Theresa, I have the book "Raising Boys" by Steve Biddulph. It has been invaluable at times. Boys actually have a testosterone surge at around the age of 4, which tends to drop around the age of 5. This could explain why the sudden onset again.

I would suggest setting up a reward chart at home. Give him a sticker for his reward chart each day that the carers tell you he has not been involved in his negative behaviour, and when he fills his chart, or every time he goes a week without the negative behaviour, take him shopping with you to choose a little treat or a toy he wants. If punishment isn't working, you may find that positive reinforcement will work.

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Theresa - posted on 08/07/2009

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Unfortunetly, he only does it at daycare and is an only child. Daycare is being really good about telling him it's inappropriate and he has to sit on the naughty bench. My husband and I don't argue and we don't hit, even playfully.

Ciara - posted on 08/07/2009

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Is there something going on at home that he's seeing thats causing this?? lil kids tend to immitate what they see. Maybe you can find the source?? I dunno what else to say really.. I hope it stops!

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