how do u deal with bullying gone too far?

Melissa - posted on 09/16/2009 ( 25 moms have responded )

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.my boy is 9, a boy his age has been bullying him on and off for some time, i have talked to the school, his parents and councelors but today by boy came home with a broken bone from this boy pushing him, am i wrong in thinking that it has now gone to far and wanting to get the authorities involved in this

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Amanda - posted on 09/17/2009

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a similar thing happened to us last year in kindergarten, my son came home with gauges directly under his eyes in addition to the back of his neck and in his mouth.He now has scars from the ones under his eyes. I was very lucky that the school did take care of the situation because I knew the family [we go to church with them :(] and they definatly would not have dealt with the problem. However I was prepared to battle, I read the schools handbook [which I suggest you do] and found in the handbook regarding physical attacks that the child doing the attacking would be expelled, I would have made darn sure that the boy in question would have been expelled even though he was 5. Also, and possibly most importantly for you, as part of the no child left behind act, if any school cannot protect the physical welbeing of its students the school could LOOSE its government funding.

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Donna - posted on 10/21/2010

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I was searching the web for advice if I should file a report regaurding my son being bullied at school by the same kid for the past three years. I thought it was taken care of until today I found out my son had been "tablet topped" So not happy. I'm filing today. I hope all turned out okay with your son.

Chasity - posted on 09/21/2009

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Go back to the school if your son has a broken bone because of this boy I would do everything to get him suspended, its not fair that he has to be afraid to go to school. Tell the parents that you just may go to the authorities and see what happens then. If all else fails then yes go to the authorities, I would also be sending those parents the medical bill, most of the time when people have to pay out money it reallly can influence the way they punish or talk to there son.

Katie - posted on 09/20/2009

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Gather as much documentation you can and go to the authorities. If it's gone as far as physical injury and you've made prior efforts with the school and the bullies parents, it's obvious that there's not other choice left.

Amber - posted on 09/20/2009

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NO, the neighbor boy strangled my son. He left marks and in front of 15 witnesses who said my son did nothing to prevoke this. Have talked to the mom and she did nothing. The school was very supportive and I called child services. This child also happens to kill animals and say the most inappropriate things for an 8 yr old and the strangling was the last straw. Bullies will Not be tolerated.

Dawn - posted on 09/20/2009

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Have you personally talked to the boy? Have you had your son try to ignore this boy? (With no fuel the fire will burn out). If the parents aren't willing to get involved and you've tried everything else. At the medical facility where you get the broken bone fixed, you need them to document how it happened. (Again, your son can not be fueling the fire or he's just as involved). If he's not fueling the fire then document the issue with the police. Good luck. Remember one thing, if this does not get resolved your son will have lasting effects throughout his life about this bullying.

Annie - posted on 09/19/2009

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Immediately report it to the police. Even though they are minor's it is still assault when bones are broken. As a mom, it is your nature to prtect your son, Even though going to the police could incite more bullying, I'm pretty sure once these parent's realize that you can file a civil suit against them for your son's medical bills, as well as pain and suffering and time lost from work for yourself, by dealing with this issue, I'm sure they would be more than happy to make sure their child doesn't do this to another child. I'm so sorry for your son, Hopefully he has a speedy recovery. Best Wishes!!

Sophie - posted on 09/18/2009

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Not only should you go to the police but you also need to go to the school district and get on this principal for not handling things sooner. A broken bone is WAY out of control! Also, once all this has settled some, when my little one started getting bullied at school, I put him in a karate program that focused on handling bully situations and it helped him alot.

Audrey - posted on 09/18/2009

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I have a question: what happened to the bully this time? was he reprimanded at all? or another slap on the wrist? not that any of that matters, because without a doubt, involve the authorities immediately! You are your son's bestadvocate, and he should not be terrorized at school any more. Put a stop to it now. My prayers go to you and your son & the rest of your family.

Rose - posted on 09/18/2009

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Definately call the authorities and have them go to the school too and file a complaint against the Administrators too.

Ilene - posted on 09/18/2009

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I agree with everyone else. The bully has gone too far and needs to be removed from the school.

Debora - posted on 09/18/2009

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ALL THESE PEOPLE ARE RIGHT FILE A POLICE REPORT WHEN YOU DO MAKE SURE TO SHOW THEM A DRS REPORT BUT TELL THEM YOU NEED IT TO BRING CHARGES AGAINST THE SCHOOL .YOU CAN FILE THE COMPLAINT AGAINST THE SCHOOL BY CONTACTING THE STATES BOARD OF EDUCATION OFFICE .I WOULD ALSO FILE IT WITH COUNTY FAMILY COURT TO MAKE THIS BOYS PARENTS PAY FOR HIS PAIN,AND ALL BILLS.

Lmf64 - posted on 09/18/2009

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Call the cops! Stop the bully and his family in their tracks! It truely doesn't matter to me if you had gone through all the others first. Your son was assaulted and you need to show him that you will do everything within your power to protect him. I have found that it does no good to talk to parents. Little Johnny is an angel and your child made him do it. Little Johnny is on his way to prison for life if something isn't done now to stop him dead in his tracks and he's still young enough to learn his lesson and maybe the parents and school will learn theirs at the same time.

Haley - posted on 09/18/2009

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No, you are not wrong. As long as you took it up with teachers and everyone else first. I think that I WOULD get the authorities involved. Maybe the child that is bullying you son is having problems at home to make him act out this way. If I were in your shoes the only solution that I see know IS the authorities.

Ruth - posted on 09/17/2009

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do it know go the the authorities.you should also find out who the school governers are and write a complaint to them keep copies of all correspondance from the hospital about your son broken arm, also tell them how it hsappened and you will be surprised , there are certain actions the hospital can take against the school and the bully, dont let it go any further my daughter was bullied from year 7 it got to the point of her self harming because i thought the school was dealing with it...i took her out of school in year 9, and taught her at home.she know has several issues she is trying to deal with because of 3 girls who would not leave her be in school and out... PROTECT YOUR SON......he has rights too.

good luck to all of you

Kara - posted on 09/17/2009

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I have a 9-year old son who is also being bullied. It hasn't gotten to your level yet (& I hope it never does), but his dad & I have discussed what we would do & we would definitely go to the authorities. I agree w/Melissa below.

Clara - posted on 09/17/2009

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I would definitely go to the authorities. It's a broken bone now. What will it be next? Your son should be SAFE at a place where he spends most of his days during ALL of the week. It is RIDICULOUS that you should even have to go to the police. This matter should have been resolved way before it reached this point. Since you have taken all the necessary steps and have gotten NO support, I think its time you called in the reenforcement. Hope all goes well and that your son is ok!!!

Suzanne - posted on 09/16/2009

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if you have done all the proper roads in trying to deal with this then yes go to authorities mate. I had to threaten the kid that teased mine with the police before it stopped. I went also to the education department as i didnt think the principal was doing all she could have.

Jamie - posted on 09/16/2009

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NO you are not wrong at all, you've talked to everone you can and still nothing has been done to stop the kid from bullying. I would do what I had to to keep my 8 yr old safe. your next stop is to go one step above witch is the authorities. Good luck. my thoughts are with you.



Jamie

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call the police immediately. escalating violence such as that could lead to more violence in the future.

Janeen - posted on 09/16/2009

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I completely agree! YOu should call the cops, your son has the right to be safe at school. That child should be expelled from school also, I would file a report and then go to the school and demand something be done!

Laurel - posted on 09/16/2009

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melissa,

If you have gone to the school and the boys parents and have not gotten anywhere, then I would go to the authorities this is no longer a case of bullying, this is a case of assault and the child should not get away with it. If the child is allowed to continue acting this way something far worse than a broken bone could be next.....I hope your son is Okay and stick to this, dont let this go, your son deserves to have you be his advocate!!!!!

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