Husband jealous and hate your friends

Julie - posted on 08/19/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My husband is a very jealous man when it comes to my friends. He knows them very well and I known my friends way before he came into my life. All of my friends are moms and we hang out together to talk while our kids play together. I don't see anything wrong. He hates my friends and think they have nothing else to do. I think he is trying to destroy my friendships with my good friends that I have known for years but I won't let that happened. He will become quiet, won't talk to me, will not eat the food I make and go out with his coworkers alone.. We have talked about this issue, then he is okay, then the next thing he is back to the same pattern. Need some advice cause I don't know how much longer I can tolerate with his behavior. Has anyone has a problem similiar to mine and if so what did you do or how did you cope with it?

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Melanie - posted on 08/19/2009

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You need to be aware that this behaviour is also known as emotional blackmail. If you give into it he will begin to control you and who knows where it will end. To change this behaviour your husband needs to not only know what he is doing is wrong, but want to change. It will probably mean councilling. If he is not prepared to do that for you then go, you need to get out of there.

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Becca - posted on 08/19/2009

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Really the problem is his. He's a grown man and need to act it. If he feel that you are not spending enough time w/just him or are as a family than he needs to tell you in a nice adult way. If the playdates are while he's at work, does he think you are not doing what needs to be done at home? His reasons could be endless but you need to find out for sure what's what. To be honest it sounds like old fashion jealousy, he's at work, your playing, you go out with your friends he make an outing with his. Good luck maybe marriage/family counseling would be worth the time and money.

Marilyn - posted on 08/19/2009

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Julie you are not alone, my boyfriend is very jealous and can be very hostile towards my friends because most of them are single and he doesn't agree with thier lives. I have no solution for your situation since I barely have found one for myself except I see that when I do hang out with friends who like me are parent oriented and are in a stable relationship he does back off. Don't let him isolate you though give him an ultamatitum and give him maybe a taste of his own medicine maybe that will show him what you feel. I am here for you!!

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