I don't want to go to school, why doesnt my 9 year old want to go to school

Pip - posted on 05/25/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I have a 9 year old girl and a 5 year old boy ( who started school this year). My daughter has complained since she started school about going and despite lots of investigations and talking about' why not 'it seems to be getting worse. As my boy started this year i'm scared she will influence him and he will start doing the same. This is very stressfull and upsets me almost daily.She seems grumpy and moody too, its like teenager stuff already... HELP

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SiewYean - posted on 05/25/2010

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You may want to investigate and find out the exact cause. My girl is 9 this year. She has enjoyed school all along until this year. She will have tummy ache and she said she is worried going to school. She cried on Sunday night as she knows she will have to go to school on Monday. I understand this is all due to stress in school - she saw how her classmates got punished by teacher if any of the following happens:
- homework not completed
- does not score better than 90 marks in spelling
- forgotten to bring books
- can't answer the question posted by teacher
I know it sounds crazy but that's the system in the Chinese medium school here in Asia. I have to reassure her that she is doing fine and it is not a doom's day when the above happens. I plan to have a talk with the teacher in the next teacher and parent meeting session.

My son had the same problem last year. He had difficulty coping with his school work so he will have tummy ache before going to school almost everyday. The school had put him in another class where the speed is slower and he is now able to follow through his school work. He seems happy with school now.

You need to find out the root cause...it could be something which trigger some stress in the child to make her dislike going to school.

Candice - posted on 05/25/2010

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I have an 8 1/2 year old and I think it is the norm for them to give attitude. Sadly, our little girls are growing up way to quickly. Have you talked with her about possible issues at school with friends or bullies? I was amazed at how many bullies there are in her school. Once we got over the issue of friendship she seemed to find a new found love for school. We also really focus on what she excels in at school and what she really likes about being there. Maybe you already have, but I would talk to the teacher's about your concerns also. Then again, she may be clashing with the teacher. Just a thought!

Pip - posted on 05/25/2010

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She is good at her school work, has never had any trouble, has two parents at home and we dont say how we didnt like school,in fact we both generally liked school...i didnt mention that the way she goes about it is to say she feels sick and she asks if I am going to be home that day before she starts saying she feels sick ...mmmm Its the attitude too, arent kids this age cheerful and want to see their friends, she gets soo moody

Janice - posted on 05/25/2010

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Does she have a tough time with school - sitting or with the work? Do you or Dad (if she has one) talk about not liking school? Does it get a reaction she likes?

Just some things to think about.

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