Is there a way to help?

Kelly - posted on 07/27/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )

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my oldest son is 5 and for around 18 months he has became out of hand in and outside of school, i married last year and he has taken really well to my husband, however he will lash out and scream for silly things like "his brother took his toy" or "he doesnt want to watch a certain thing on tv". I have tried everything i can to calm him down and get him out of this phase but nothing seems to help, i have spoke to health visitors and doctors but they say its his age and that he will grow out of it, ive never known a child to be as angry and stressed out as he is, his younger brother isnt like it.....is anybody else having these problems with their little ones? can you help me? kelly

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Crista - posted on 07/27/2013

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Did it just begin this year or have there been signs of this from earlier on? I ask because my son is like this somewhat but even from early on he was more difficult than my other children (who are girls and everyone kept telling me it was a boy thing...). I'm no doctor. My son, like his dad, seems to be bi polar. He is only 6 and we have avoided the label for now of him being bi polar but we are fairly certain he suffers in the same way his dad did as a boy. Tantrums don't describe how he lashes out and is hateful at times to me, his dad and sisters. He is a kind boy a lot of the time but has problems sleeping and anxiety a lot.
Your son may be going through normal upset, even if he likes your husband, it's change and some children do not do well with change. My middle daughter is so quiet and sweet and always does what she is told. The first week of school her teacher sent a note saying she had been scratching, biting and lashing out at kids! Turns out, she was just reacting out of anxiety. It passed after about a week thank goodness. But my son is different. My only advice, because there are so many things it really could be, is to keep a journal. Once I started a journal, we could clearly see times of day that my son was most upset or times of month and what things seem to trigger it etc. It was soooo helpful. Even if it is only a phase, it couldn't hurt to track his behavior for a few months and see if any patterns arise. Mine is simple. Just a calendar with big boxes. I write his a.m behavior on mon, then afternoon, then evening. I do this each day and at the bottom I have room to expand if I need to write about something in detail. I also ask him how he is feeling. I would start there. You may see no patterns. You may see he is most upset in the early evening and it may be something as simple as low blood sugar? Hope this helps.

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