Lost and confused.

Stephanie - posted on 11/16/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My son is 6 and very happy, often overly generous child. He is in boy scouts and is usually pretty active playing outside, baseball, or soccer. My husband and I are also active in these activities with him. I've talked to the school and he was observed by the principal but him and his teachers agree that he is an extremely social child with tons of friends even for his age. He shows a lot of compasion for his younger brother who is 3 but also gets in the normal regular arguements with him.

What I'm trying to find out is why in the last few months he has been getting so upset about "not having any friends" or about all the kids having something he doesn't (even when NONE of them do!). He says things like "I'm horrible", or "I don't matter." We spend a lot of time with him. We read books together every night before bed. Do homework together. We camp with his scouts. My husband even coached both his soccer and T-ball team. Unfortunatly for my younger son we probably spend majority of our time with Kaiden because of all his activities.

My husband and I have a great marriage too. We generally get in one all out arguement a year but still have our grouch moments with each other on occation. Still we enjoy each others company and I couldn't speak more about how great of a man and father he is.

I don't think that there is necessarily anything wrong with Kaiden. He has always been a little sensitive to other people but even when everything is great he will still throw a random crying fit and I don't know what to do or say to him to help. This happens 2 or 3 times a week.

Really I'm just looking for something... anything. Validation, advice, even if you tell me I'm doing everything wrong I would be excited because I know I can change that!
Not sure if this is a normal 6 year old behavor, if it's just his personality, or if I should be addressing something differently.

3 Comments

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Sharlene - posted on 11/17/2011

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Do you think he has bad behavior's just as Autsim?? If you are that concern seek your doctor to see a child spcialist to assess him.All the best

Kathy - posted on 11/17/2011

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Have you delved with him? Let him explain. Ask him questions? My 7yo is super social and has anger issues. He's very verbal and has a great vocabulary ever since he was like 4. So, we've asked him question about his feelings. And he's answered them and then we've helped solve those questions together. Good luck! It always hurts a mom's heart when she hears her kiddos say things like that.

Janet - posted on 11/16/2011

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Not to sound like a big downer, but it is entirely possible that your son suffers from Childhood Depression. If you've spoken to your school, observed that his declarations of "not having any friends" or "I don't matter" etc are fairly, in your opinion, is unfounded - he may actually be depressed, which can happen without him actually having anything to be sad about. "depression is a biologically-based illness and children can fall prey to it just like adults."

http://depression.about.com/od/childhood...

I'd probably talk to your family doctor about it and see if there is anything they can do to rule out, or confirm, suspicions of depression.

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