My son started kindergarten in sept and is having behavoiral problems

Ashley - posted on 11/06/2009 ( 15 moms have responded )

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he's always been on the wild side but the school is so quick to judge. They are having him evaluated and have been sending me things about my special needs child. he is not special needs. He is very smart and understands him hw. any advice?

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Stacy - posted on 11/17/2009

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Maybe he is bored with it. Or maybe have him tested for adhd can shed some light on a few things. My best friend after fighting with her child just found out he suffers from being bipolar he is normal in alot of ways, but has these outraged fits from time to time. He was classified adhd for a year, recently classified bipolar. There is nothing wrong with having a child with a sort of special needs. Do all the test they send you for and go from there. Go over all your options!

Rose - posted on 11/17/2009

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I agree with letting the school do the IEP. Make sure after it's done that they really do add it to his file, my middle son's was never recorded properly so the extra helps he needed were hard to get until I jumped thru a lot hoops. Both of my son's have ADHD, we had one evaluated but not the other, his doctor didn't think it would help because he didn't have any learning disabilities but in hind sight it would have helped tremendously I think if only to let the teachers know that he wasn't a bad egg. He was labeled a problem in kindergarten and made sure he lived up to their expectations from that time on until he entered a technical high school and the hands on environment, all new school system and new classmates gave him the chance to start over and enough acitivity and challenges to help him stay focused. He took medication but we found that it wasn't the miracle answer. My middle son takes medication, he can barely read without it, we don't give it to him in the summer because his zooming around doesn't bother me and he doesn't have to do intricate work that would require him to be really focused. I am not opposed to medicine as so many parents are but I don't think everyone needs it, I think children are labeled too quickly these days and I don't believe it should be used as a means of keeping a chlds behind in a seat. Be careful though that you don't not get the correct help, if that involves medicine, because of false information. I always told people that if my child needed crutches or a wheelchair and I didn't provide it people would think I was an abusive parent, I see medication no differently.

Kim - posted on 11/11/2009

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Kindergarten was a nightmare for my son. After talking with his pediatrician, we discovered he was not ADHD, he was just acting out. We started giving him NordicNaturals-cod liver oil twice a day and that really helped. He was also really bored with kindergarten...giving him harder work and moving him up in math and reading helped also. When my son is bored, he is active. Keep him active and he is not bored! We kept all this up for 1st grade and he made principals honor roll all four marking periods! Hope this helps

Shamekia - posted on 11/11/2009

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He'll get use to it. It's a new environment, where he has to share things and learn hoe to get along with other children his age. Try paly dates see if that will work. Where he can work on his social skills.... Good Luck...

[deleted account]

I am the same way my son was in the gifted for higher learning but was always getting in trouble, he's in 7th grade this yr. and it seems to be better but it's hard to listen to teacher critisize your child, i am from a very small town and went to school with most of the teachers, so i know they don't have much experence but i also understand how difficult if can be with a class of 20 + kids and having one that just wont or can't sit still and pay attention. the teacher here aren't as understanding he was labled a bad egg all threw elementry and it's hard on the child also, but other than home school there isn't any choice of what to do around here if you don't agree with the school. Hope your problem isn't this bad but if it does get ugle there are many places you can look for a childs rights. Google child advocate for kids with ADHD & ADD. it's not just for those problems but it's for all kids with special needs. It's helped me alot with knowing and understanding what you and your childs right are with the school. I thought i had to medicate my son cause the school said i had to until i did reaserce. I don't want my son medicated it's not for him he hated it & i hated what it did to him.

[deleted account]

So ... there has just been a huge jump in events and expectations, in surroundings and routines, in friends and interactions ... kids playing up at that kind of thing is normal.

If the doctor does not see any reason for your son having special treatment (special needs), then I would personally opt to ignore the school.

Instead I would create more one on one space with him to talk through events, developments, what he's enjoying, what he doesn't like and then make a plan of action.

Rose - posted on 11/11/2009

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From experience. My oldest was extremely smart, reading @ 4 yrs. Anyway, we had the same problems. Looking back I should have pulled him out and kept him home for another year. He was smart but not mature enough to handle the situation. My pride kept me from pulling him, we had nothing but problems until high school.

Kristin - posted on 11/10/2009

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Coming from a mother who had an IEP growing up and with a son who has one. Trust me there are several different forms of special needs out there and it would be better safe then sorry. My son was the same way when he started kindergarden and was constantly getting in trouble to the point that they were going to hold him back. We had an IEP on him done before he started school b/c I knew what to look for since I was an IEP and ADHD (before it became a fad) child so we knew what was wrong, he speech problems and a ADHD, but his school just didn't want him after we discovered several parents with children like my son was being singled out constantly for behavior issues and be told of being hold back, they didn't want IEP children in their school from what us parents could tell. We moved him to another school system 2 months before summer and lets just say my son is in the 1st grade, a straight A student, and very rarely gets in trouble. Get an IEP on your son just to make sure there is nothing there and also check up on the school and talk to other parents there maybe something there that the school doesn't want you to see. Besides IEP are good if there is something as simple as needing a calculator in class to a laptop. Me I needed a tape recorder so I could listen to my teachers give notes, it helped me. Its better safe then sorry in my book.

Jackie - posted on 11/10/2009

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My son had a really, really hard time in kindergarten. After watching him in class, having evaluations done, testing, etc... my husband and I finally figured out the bus driver was smacking kids (as well as our son) on the way to school which was causing a lot of emotional stress on our boy; the driver was threatening the kids that he would kill the family of any child that told.
Anyway dont always think about learning problems but look into emotional and environment issues as well.

Julie - posted on 11/09/2009

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I agree with Jayme. Once your child is tested, you might find out something or there might not be anything there at all. But it is best to find out now when he's 5 and not when he's 7 about to fail the 2nd grade. If your child has an EIP done, doesn't mean he's slow. My daughter had an EIP done when she was tested for gifted. Your school must keep on record of any findings from the testings and it's done in an EIP. The EIP is updated yearly or every other year. It's also kept on file with the school system which is an advantage like Jayme wrote, so the school has on record of his testing results. Good luck. Hope we can get an update when you know more.

Kennetha - posted on 11/09/2009

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Well when a child can not be controlled then they feel that the child has a problem. Just go to the school and see what his day is like. Sometimes our children acted differlty around others when we are not around. See if he is bored, or if he is asking for help and is being left alone to much. He is tring to get someones attention and you need to see why. Hope this helps.

Jayme - posted on 11/09/2009

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My son is in 1st grade this year, in Kindergarten he had the same problems as you- he has always been very very active and he was bringing discipline notes home every day. We had him evaluated and he has a very mild Tic disorder and along with that comes hyperactivity. This year he has a very understanding teacher that has ways to let him move his body throughout the day and discipline troubles have not been an issue. He is also very bright, reading at 4th grade level so I was hesitant to get an IEP but our teacher suggested a 504 plan for him which means that the school has a record of his needs and he's not just labeled as "naughty". This way they need to take into consideration his need to move and not discipline him for it.

Angie - posted on 11/07/2009

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He's still very young and may be having a hard time adjusting to kindergarten. The evaluation will not show anything that is not there, so don't worry about that. Children can be "special needs" for many different reasons. Don't let the label scare you. As Michelle Hansen Daberkow said, schools see a lot of children and can see difficulties quickly. She's also right when she says it's wise to have him tested early because he will get the help he needs to learn in the way that is best for him.

Michelle - posted on 11/07/2009

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i see from your thing he's only 5 years and 3 months so on the young side he just may not have the maturity to be in kindy yet or he may have adhd or add

[deleted account]

Special needs might be as nice as getting an individual educational plan (IEP) done for him to help with gifted issues. Special needs are a large range of items.

Sign to get testing done in school, then see what the deal is. Maybe they have an idea of how to guide his learning so that it is not disturbing to the class... maybe he is not disturbing the class... schools aren't too quick to judge. They have seen a lot. They know an issue and may be able to help...and the sooner you and those teachers jump into a plan, the sooner he can learn with ease.

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