PLZ HELP! My nearly 6 yr old has daily toilet accidents

Bek - posted on 10/31/2013 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I've spoken to her teachers about bullying ( which has occurred very little) I've tried ignoring it, hassling her about it, lovingly coaxing her, reward chart, empty threats but nothing is working. She says she doesn't want to miss out on anything i.e playtime & lunchtime & strangely, would rather wet/soil herself, then go to the bathroom. Any suggestions at all r very welcome. Bar seeking professional help, I am completely at a loss.,,

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Bek - posted on 11/03/2013

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Thnx for the reply. I do minimise her fluid intake anyway. Was your girl initially unfazed by it?

[deleted account]

My daughter use to do that and for the same reasons. Watching TV, playing...does not think about it and runs at the last min to the bathroom. She grew out of it. Now she does it once in a while but she is aware and embarrassed by it. Don't worry she will change. Meanwhile, make sure you make go to the bathroom on regular intervals even if she does not feel like it. When she is not around such as school,...maybe try giving her less fluids.

Bek - posted on 11/02/2013

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Yeah, I totally agree with the fact that she doesn't want to because she can. My girl is quite lazy in a lot if ways - i have repeatedly cautioned her re: other kids possible taunts but the odd thing is she doesn't seem fazed or that she is wet or soiled. What to do.....

Enna - posted on 11/01/2013

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Well, if she doesn't have some medical reason for doing it, then I think it's just something she's going to have to deal with. Eventually the other kids are going to start making fun of her for it. That will probably be a pretty big motivator for her to stop doing it. That's one way people learn to behave in socially acceptable ways: other people point out things that they're doing that aren't normal, then they change their behavior. For example: picking your nose and washing your hands. If you see someone picking their nose or leaving the restroom without washing their hands, then you are probably going to say something. Maybe not directly to them, but something out loud. I find myself saying things like "I can't believe someone would leave the bathroom without washing their hands YUCK!" when I walk past them. It's just natural. The problem is when someone can't change the behavior. It sounds like your daughter just doesn't want to.
Also, it sounds to me like the teacher could also do a better job of getting all the kids to go to the restroom. If everyone's going, then she won't feel like she's missing anything.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 10/31/2013

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Perfectly normal, actually (unless she's been needing to go more frequently than usual, which is a medical concern)

Kids that age worry that they'll "miss something" if they stop to go to the restroom.

I would recommend that you get her in to the pediatrician, explain your concern, and her symptoms, and see if she needs any tests for medical conditions, though. Otherwise, continue to encourage her to do better.

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