problems with kindergarten teachers

Larissa - posted on 09/29/2009 ( 31 moms have responded )

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as the title says im having issues with my sons kindergarten teacher,he is ready and old enough to be in kindergarten,his pre school teachers both said he is ready but she(teacher) keeps telling me to pull him out.
now i know he can do the work,and he does but her thing is and i quote her here "i have 21 other kids in my class and dont have time for him".
my response to her in my head was "well then why in bloody hell did you take that amount and not 3 you horrid wench".(lol)
i just dont know what to do with her,she knows i dont want to pull him out and i have no reason to other then her"issues" i have "bought" him till the 15th of oct before i will go meet with her with my husband but i cant keep taking him to school where the teacher doesnt want him around.has anyone else had this type of prob? any help would be great!!!!

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Julie - posted on 10/07/2009

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This is so frustrating!!! Last year my son's kindergarten teacher never smiled, intimidated him, was constantly on the computer emailing people or on her cell texting her Boyfriend. Yet when I filed compliants to the principal she sent me back to the teacher to work it out. I finally had to go to the school district. Now because of the ineptness of the kindergarten teacher, he is struggling in some areas in 1st grade.

The bottom line is. Don't wait. Tell the principal that you need to talk to her now and don't take no for an answer. If there is no resolution just go up the chain. Don't wait the whole year like I did then have your child be behind later. Nip this in the bud.

[deleted account]

If you don't have another option for a class for him, it might be better to pull him out. My daughter had a late birthday and while we had no problems in Kindy, our grade 1 sounds like what you are going thru. I ended up homeschooling grades 2&3 b/c of the damage done in grade 1. Her teacher didn't like to show her what to do and didn't like that she was shy and quiet and had a hard time speaking up in class. Due to the stress in the classroom my daughter learned very little that year and we had to catch up alot in the homeschooling. With his late birthday it wouldn't be bad for him to wait a year anyways. BUT if he is totally ready then you need to get it sorted out with her and the principal as that is wrong of her to do. Just look out for what is best for your son.

Jodi - posted on 09/29/2009

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Larissa, what does she mean by "I don't have time for him"? I can't see in your post that you have indicated the exact reason for this. Has the teacher talked to you at all about the exact behaviour she has issue with? Starting kindergarten isn't only about academic readiness, but much more about emotional and social readiness for school. Also keep in mind that the teacher doesn't have any say in how many children she has in her class. I know here in Australia the ratio of teacher/assistant to children at pre-school is 1:10, whereas once they get to kindergarten, they can be in classes of up to 30 students (depending on the school), which is a HUGE jump, and some children just aren't ready for that. On average, boys tend to cope less well when they are younger.



I think you need to really get down to what the problem really is. If you can't communicate with the teacher, then see the principal of the school about the matter and see if they can get to the bottom of it.

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Jen - posted on 10/07/2009

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Oh, my son had a few similar issues when he was in kindergarten. He was shy and his Kindergarten teacher resorted to sign language to interact with him. The idiot refused to make my kid use words; all through the year she used nothing but sign language; and complained that he wasn't ready etc. Even when she saw him use words with me. "What?? He can talk???" Yet...that didn't even changer her approach.



Is changing school's an option? That did help my son. The principle at his school back then was not helpful at all though, so I just changed his school's. Hopefully your son's principle is a help. If not, go higher up and talk to the school district or superintendent etc.



Edit: The change in school's made for a drastic improvement on my son and his shyness too. The school we changed him to was much better, attitude-wise. The school that had the idiot sign-language-using teacher wasn't helpful. At meetings the principle would side with the kindergarten teacher; and so did the counselor etc. They just sat there with a wall of opposition; ready before hand to agree with each other and disagree with me. Even the evidence that yes, my son talks was not taken as proof that his teacher should stop using sign language with him. If it ever gets as bad as that for you and your son; consider a new school if that's an option!

Ilene - posted on 10/06/2009

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I realize that she doesn't have alot of time. There are 24 K students. Unfortunately, our relationship is bad enough that I doubt she would allow me to volunteer at this time. She does seem to have issues talking with parents as we saw even on a consult. Last week, I asked for a private consult with her. She brought in the assistant Vice Principal, and two counselors from the Independent Education plan meeting. My son doesn't need an IEP. What he needs is a teacher who will give him a chance. I've had numerous people (teachers) who know my son who agree with me on this.

Angie - posted on 10/06/2009

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Quoting Ilene:

Well. Our issues are this: my son went two years to a non-academic preschool. Motor skills, etc were simply not worked on. It was all about social skills. If I could do it again, I would have pulled him out last year and put him into a real pre-k preschool. It is a combination of things with my son. First, was the "social skills preschool".

Second, we didn't realize how bad his eyesight was. We had taken him two years ago for an eye test but he refused to do it. So a month ago, I took him to see an eye doctor and found out he is practically blind in one eye and the other eye is not perfect. So he wears glasses but even that corrects the bad eye to 25/125.

He's very smart...can read, can use a computer and knows how to figure stuff out but with his bad eye sight, motor skills delays and a teacher who barely speaks to me....we're just having many issues. Today she didn't speak to me. I just don't know what to do. Just keep telling my child to do good in school and to behave.


Why doesn't his teacher speak to you?  Do you speak to her?  The honest truth is my children's teachers are usually so busy when I pick them up that they don't speak to me either - they have other things to be doing at that time.  I don't take it personally.  Start volunteering in your son's classroom so she developes a personal relationship with you.  It might help your son as well.  But to be honest, whether she speaks to you or not doesn't matter as long as she's working well with your son and you didn't mention that there was a problem with that.

Ilene - posted on 10/06/2009

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Well. Our issues are this: my son went two years to a non-academic preschool. Motor skills, etc were simply not worked on. It was all about social skills. If I could do it again, I would have pulled him out last year and put him into a real pre-k preschool. It is a combination of things with my son. First, was the "social skills preschool".

Second, we didn't realize how bad his eyesight was. We had taken him two years ago for an eye test but he refused to do it. So a month ago, I took him to see an eye doctor and found out he is practically blind in one eye and the other eye is not perfect. So he wears glasses but even that corrects the bad eye to 25/125.

He's very smart...can read, can use a computer and knows how to figure stuff out but with his bad eye sight, motor skills delays and a teacher who barely speaks to me....we're just having many issues. Today she didn't speak to me. I just don't know what to do. Just keep telling my child to do good in school and to behave.

Maranda - posted on 10/06/2009

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The worst thing about schools nowadays is that there are too many kids for one teacher to spend time teaching them in the way that they learn the best. Even if they had the time, I don't think most teachers would take the time to teach to each individual. They aren't tought how to do that. They just think that everyone learns the same. I had the same issue with my oldest son, but it didn't start until 2nd grade. He was very smart, but got bored very easily. About half of his class needed extra help with their reading and he got shoved aside. He still gets good grades but this did have an impact on him because he didn't want to be the smart one and his grades could still be better. I really didn't know what to do at the time either, but my advice now would to be to contact the principle and request that he be changed to another teacher.

Heidi - posted on 10/05/2009

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My son started JK this year and prior to school starting, we found out who is teacher was going to be and I contacted to Principal to let him know how uncomfortable I was with that specific teacher, and some underlying issues I had with her in the past. So between a few emails, and a few phone calls the principal switched classes for me. I was so happy and relieved, because JK and SK is only the beginning of school for these youngsters and if they have a bad experience that early on chances are they will not enjoy school. If it were my child I would go directly to the Principal and tell him or her what the teacher said. No teacher should ever talk like that about any child. The kids are there to learn and some are more advance then others, so the ones that aren't quite as advanced do need a little extra care and that is what the teachers are being paid for.

Libby - posted on 10/05/2009

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Quoting larissa:

problems with kindergarten teachers

as the title says im having issues with my sons kindergarten teacher,he is ready and old enough to be in kindergarten,his pre school teachers both said he is ready but she(teacher) keeps telling me to pull him out.
now i know he can do the work,and he does but her thing is and i quote her here "i have 21 other kids in my class and dont have time for him".
my response to her in my head was "well then why in bloody hell did you take that amount and not 3 you horrid wench".(lol)
i just dont know what to do with her,she knows i dont want to pull him out and i have no reason to other then her"issues" i have "bought" him till the 15th of oct before i will go meet with her with my husband but i cant keep taking him to school where the teacher doesnt want him around.has anyone else had this type of prob? any help would be great!!!!


 

Cristy - posted on 10/04/2009

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well I havent had this issue but my suggestions are.......Talk to the principal about the issue & maybe see if he could switch teachers...just because it is that teachers(issue) dosnt mean it will be with the rest of the teachers. If he is learning with the rest of his class and not disrupting it in anyway then it shouldnt be an issue at all......has she told u about any problems she has had with him? Has she said he needs more help than the other kids? If not then U should ask her to have a meeting with u, the principal,and herself. This way all questions are answered and u will know what to do.............If non of this works I guess u could move him to a different school. Thats all I have hun hope it all works out.

Shawn - posted on 10/04/2009

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I agree with the other posts, I would take these concerns to the principal and on up the ladder until a positive resolution was found. Are you able to come in and volunteer your time and be a "helper"? to better understand the teacher's concerns? With my son, his birthday is Aug 31, I've started a notebook that is kept in his backpack for any concerns to be written down between the teacher and myself - that way things are in writing and can be specifically addressed. I have already told his Pre-K teachers that I will remain open-minded about holding him back from attending Kindergarten next year if he isn't ready. Having the teachers know that you are understanding and compassionate is important not only for the relationship between you two but for your child as well! I wish you the best of luck and hope things get better soon!!!!

Williams - posted on 10/03/2009

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Definitly go to the principle and if that doesn't work, go to the Superintendent. Maybe you can have him moved to another class, I wouldn't want my child to be in a class where the teacher "Doesn't have time for him". That's what she's getting paid for.

Andrea - posted on 10/03/2009

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My son had a hard itme in kdg too, and his birthday is also late, but after some talking with the teacher and proncipal, we decided to keep him in school and if he needed to be help back then it was better to have ahead start the next year, and it helped him to not be so shy the next year too. I would keep him in if you can, maybe see about switching teachers. I am not sure where you live but I know here it is not tolerated to tell aparent those types of things. I would speak with the principal asap (sit and wait in her office after school if you have to) and if that doesnt show imediate improvement, call the school board, there is always someone else higher up the totem pole to talk to. Dont give up on him yet.

Pamela - posted on 10/03/2009

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I actually work in a school and was an aide for preschool and have to say try to keep the communication lines open sometimes teachers with all there education aren't very skilled in diplomacy or expressing themselves clearly.It could be that even though your child is ready academically he may be having some social problems that have been missed (you would be surprised how a harsh word from a classmate can affect a little one)If it can't be talked through and you still aren't satisfied then I would speak with administration but don't go over her head until you really have to it just causes hard feelings.

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What teacher says she does not have time....she needs to look for another job!!! Talk to the principal.Switch classes, her behavior may not be good for your son...Good luck!!!

Cynthia - posted on 10/03/2009

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I don't agree with what the teacher told you if that was a direct quote, but I do know that kindergarten is not always what people think it is. You have 22 students, some of whom have never been away from their parents or had any exposure to anything. In order to truly teach the students what they need to know for first grade, you need to have students who can pay attention, follow directions, and work independently to some degree. You can't focus on one child for too long because you have 21 other kids who need you too. You will ultimately have students who are high enough to be in first, low enough to need to be held back, and unfortunately you will always have some who are unidentified special ed and as the child's first teacher, you have to burst that parent's bubble and tell them that there's a problem. After reading your post, I wondered if the teacher was trying to say that perhaps your child would benefit from another year in Pre-K because while he's very bright, he isn't mature enough to stay with the class and keep up the pace. Kindergarten is not what it used to be. Kids are expected to leave Kinder reading, writing, doing addition and subtraction, identifying fractions, knowing social studies and science concepts to be built upon in first grade, and so much more. Don't let your feelings for that teacher upset you so much that you lose sight of your main goal...doing what's best for your child. I have a November child too, and I held her back a year. She entered Kinder reading, writing, and knowing so much more than most kids, but developmentally and socially it was where she needed to be. Now, she'll always be at the top of the class. If I had pushed her in too early, she could have been chronically at the bottom. Something to think about. Good Luck!

Amy - posted on 10/02/2009

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Quoting larissa:

problems with kindergarten teachers

as the title says im having issues with my sons kindergarten teacher,he is ready and old enough to be in kindergarten,his pre school teachers both said he is ready but she(teacher) keeps telling me to pull him out.
now i know he can do the work,and he does but her thing is and i quote her here "i have 21 other kids in my class and dont have time for him".
my response to her in my head was "well then why in bloody hell did you take that amount and not 3 you horrid wench".(lol)
i just dont know what to do with her,she knows i dont want to pull him out and i have no reason to other then her"issues" i have "bought" him till the 15th of oct before i will go meet with her with my husband but i cant keep taking him to school where the teacher doesnt want him around.has anyone else had this type of prob? any help would be great!!!!



why can't you guys meet until the 15th? that's a long way away! how old is your son? if he is 5 he may not be developmentally ready to sit still that long! my son couldn't think about sitting still for a 1/2 day of kindergarten until he was 6. you should not feel like your teacher doesn't want him, are there other k teachers? just remember that you are the best advocate for your child and do what you feel is best for him!!

Lisa - posted on 10/02/2009

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no I can't say I've had this issue. I would however take it up the ladder and that Oct meeting should be with an administrator. I know there are placement test that could back you up on his development level.

Toni - posted on 10/01/2009

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I would pull him as well. My daughter started at four and she wasn't mature enough. She knew the work and understood it but there was a major maturity issue. I wish i would have kept her home another year.

Jennifer - posted on 10/01/2009

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How completely unprofessional and just plain rude of her. I am a kindergarten teacher and I'm sorry but that is just wrong... Definitely, go to the principal as soon as you can and get him out of that classroom. She cannot dictate who she has in her classroom and she cannot make you pull him out. Has she spoken to you about the issues he is having in the classroom. If not, find out what they are. She should be trying to work with you not against you! Ugh... some people were just not cut out to teach.

Angie - posted on 09/30/2009

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My youngest was "ready" for kindergarten at 4 as well (her birthday is also in November). The teacher suggested that even though she was ready that because she is very shy, it might be better for her to wait a year. I took her advice and I've never been happier. It was the best decision I ever made for my daughter. If the teacher does have 21 other students in her class, she truly may not have time to stop her teaching to show one child everything. Try to take a step back and really think about it. The teacher may not like younger, shy students because they might make it impossible for her to stay on schedule with the rest of the class.

Jodi - posted on 09/30/2009

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Larissa, both of my brothers had boys who would have been still only 4 when they started Kindergarten year (which is the first year of 'big school' here), and so was my step-son. All of them ended up being held back until the school year they turned 6, and we all agree it was the best decision because they are doing extremely well in school. They just have that little extra bit of maturity. It is quite common for boys to be further behind the girls socially and sometimes waiting that extra year will make all the difference. Sometimes a second year of pre-school can work magic :) Just a thought - if you can't sort things out, don't feel that bad about it - it happens all the time with some of the younger ones, and it has now become very common here in Australia for people to wait that extra year if they have one of the younger kids - particularly with boys.

Larissa - posted on 09/30/2009

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im going to talk with the principal soon,she just said he doesnt do what she asks but he is one of those kids who need to be shown what to as well as told.but i dont think she understands that. all the other classes are full :( he will be turning 5 in nov he is mentally ready but he is shy ive told her that but she doesnt like shy kids? i cant make him an outgoing nn shy child.thats just the way she is..i believe this is mostly a attitude clash with him and her hopefully we can figure something out here soon.

Michelle - posted on 09/30/2009

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I can not believe the teacher told you she doesn't have time for him. She is a kindergarten teacher for pete sake. She knew what she was getting into when she signed up to teach kindergarten. I can't believe she would say something like that.

Get hold of the principal ASAP and tell him/her what the teacher said. It may be time to put your son into a different class at the school. It may just be something as simple as their personalities do not mesh but for her to tell you she doesn't have time for your child is wrong in so many ways.

Good luck with this.

Beth - posted on 09/29/2009

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is he 5 or will he be before the end of the year? if he will be then what's her issue? Speak to the principal if you have to about it.

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