Protective mother

Cassandra - posted on 07/04/2010 ( 17 moms have responded )

7

9

0

I was wondering if you would rather let another person boss/yell/punish your children, or would you rather have the individual come to you and let you deal with your children? I feel that if you are not the mother/father, grandmother/grandfather, that any thing that bothers you about my children you should let me know, so I can address the situation, and not the other way around.

17 Comments

View replies by

Pumla - posted on 10/09/2011

4

59

0

I think as a parent it is your responsibilty to do the discipline and punishing....i rather do it myself.

Kelly - posted on 10/06/2011

168

24

8

It depends what it is. I've spoken to parents, aboput their 4yr olds beating up on my 2 yr old at playgrounds and all they've done is tell me he must've deserved it. If my son is genuinly doing something dangerous or hurting another child, fine, tell him off. B ut don't expect me not to do the same to yours.

Donna - posted on 10/03/2011

657

16

39

yes i would let someone correct my daughters's behavior bc sometimes i feel lke if its someone else telling them they tend to listen better than to have me yelling at them.

Sherri - posted on 09/27/2011

9,593

15

391

Yes at anyone's house we visit then they most definitely can say something to my kids if they feel their behavior is inappropriate and do, if they feel it is warranted.



I also have the same rule in my house if you do not like it then please do not visit. Sorry my house my rules and I will speak to your child if he/she is breaking one of them.

Leeann - posted on 09/27/2011

235

26

8

i have a small group of girlfriends More like my sisters really) and we all have children about the same age. from day one we have been in each other childrens lives and have watched them grow. we also step into discipline when needed. when my bestie son was having behavioral issues i stepped in and told him to Knock It Off We Dont Speak T Mommy That Way. he listened, I'm auntie leea to him and my word is as good as gold.

when my daughter mouths off and one of my girlfriends are around they fuss at her as well. we're family and its just how we've always been. now if a strange stepped in and said something that would be a different story. they would have to come to me calmly and politely. But if my children were doing something that could not only harm themselves, but others people should step in. it takes a village to raise a child.

Bevely - posted on 08/17/2011

120

0

16

I'm actually looking into getting t-shirts for my kids that say, "If you see me acting up, please feel free to fuss at me, I'm sure I deserve it, and my mother appreciates it"



I can't be everywhere at once, so if I am not around then please fill in for me. I am not worried about them getting their feelings hurt, if they would of been acting right in the first place they wouldn't of gotten into trouble.

Jenelle - posted on 08/16/2011

9

10

0

It depends on the situation. If it is a behavior that you are teaching your child not to do and another parent is just simply reinforcing that behavior whether it be talking to the child or stating that if the child does the behavior again that that parent will put the child in time-out or something similar, I feel it's ok. I feel that if other parents can help reinforce the behaviors I am trying to teach my children that it only helps the child realize that there are rules and they apply to all kids. Children need to see that just because it's not their actual parent disciplining them, that other adults are capable in doing so. To me, it teaches them to behave and that adults will guide them into the correct behaviors the parents are trying to instill in them. Now, to boss or yell at a child other than their own, is not acceptable. A nice firm tone of voice in communication while explaining to the child why the behavior is unacceptable is sufficient.

Amy - posted on 03/30/2011

7

22

0

I agree, anyone else but family should not be punishing your child!! Mother bear doesn't do well with that, ask me first that is my most important little person...My daughter! I should be notified before doing anything! ~ Amy

Amy - posted on 03/30/2011

7

22

0

I agree, anyone else but family should not be punishing your child!! Mother bear doesn't do well with that, ask me first that is my most important little person...My daughter! I should be notified before doing anything! ~ Amy

Jeannie - posted on 07/07/2010

30

31

2

I absolutely agree with you...I DO NOT let anyone discipline my child at all....if he's doing something, come to me cause if not there will be h--- to pay...lol If I am present, I don't care if it's my family or friends...no one disciplines him but me...if im not around and someone is watching him, do not hit my child, label him nor scream at him or someone will go through the wall....lol

Aniko - posted on 07/07/2010

10

43

0

I think that person should definitely talk to you first, about the situation that had happened, and i mean whoever, may it be grandmother, mother, teachers and so on. You can talk to your child about it, if it occurs again, you could tell the other grownups, that they can talk to your child in of course not yelling ways to your child, but punishing as long as it is, sitting them in a time out corner, should be enough and you do the rest of punishing IF necessary.

Tina - posted on 07/06/2010

7

29

0

If it's a safety issue... sure yell at my child. Punish... no way. Only I can do that. Correct him if he is being rude or disrespectful, but if it's a big issue, then they better be telling me about it.

[deleted account]

punish.... no one but family.
yell, i gues anyone, but I will yell back
boss, anyone who is entrusted with my kid. AND my kids know that if anyone tells them to do something that feels wrong to them, they can tell that person they have to ask mommy first, and whether they do it or not they have to tell me. Then there will be..... lets just say I am all for the punishment they implement in Singapore.

Angie - posted on 07/05/2010

2,621

0

407

It depends on the situation and who is disciplining them. If it's the parents of a friend or a teacher, I don't mind if they discipline them. I don't yell at my kids and I don't anyone else doing it either. When it was the lady down the street who yelled at my girls and told them they were thieves because they were picking flowers out of the neighbors yard - for the neighbor; I don't appreciate that!

Rebecca - posted on 07/05/2010

104

32

5

In addition to my husband, myself and the grandparents, I allow my best friend and her husband (who are "Aunt and Uncle") to discipline my son. Anyone else had better come to me or one of the people I mentioned above to correct my his behavior.

Monica - posted on 07/05/2010

171

0

45

It depends on the situation. If they were staying at someones house and I am not there, they should be able to have the rules of their home apply to my kids. When children come in my home without their parents, I expect the kids to obey my rules. For example, we do not allow standing or bouncing on furniture and I have had a child come into my home to do that and I have told them to stop it.

If I was among friends and closeby but not right there with my child who was acting up, I would want them to come tell me, so I can handle it. I would do the same and go get that child's parent.

However, if there is a child on a playground indoor or outdoor who was being a terror to the other children and the parent who I do not know was sitting on a bench allowing it to happen, you bet I would be right there telling that kid to stop it.

So, I guess it depends what is going on and where you are.

[deleted account]

I agree, I think it confuses children when they are punished by too many people. There is no reason anyone should yell at your children, they should have enough respect for you as a parent to come to you with their concerns. As long as you have open ears and are willing to listen this should work out well no matter what the situation. I have never yelled at anyone's child in my home. I calmly tell them "we don't do that in our house". Works just fine with no hurt feelings.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms