school woes

Nikki - posted on 11/19/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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my son recently started resisting going to school. we'd drop him off at the gates in the morning so he can walk up to where he lines up, recently tho he's stopping still half way up the path and refuses to go any further. i then have to physically drag him into the school office so they can take him. he'll them refuse to go into his class, do schoolwork or do anything. im at my wits end and do not know wat to do to help him. he says he does it cos he wants to be at home with me or his dad, or schools boring or any other number of reasons! please advise

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Kekua - posted on 11/20/2009

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Something's up. If it's something that came on rather suddenly he's probably afraid of someone or some situation and is doing everything he knows to avoid it so now you have to try to find the cause.

My daughter did the same thing and even came to the point of screaming fits at her class door (and this is a kid who loves school). I suggest talking to him but you have to be kind of roundabout with it. You can't just ask why b/c you'll get the same stuff. Asking questions that seem random can eventually get a little more out of him but it's hard to do.

Maybe consider taking him to a child psychologist. School counselors are well intentioned and all but ours really wasn't any help, she was pretty set in her belief that it was just upsetting to change grades but I knew it was more. I figured out that she was afraid of the boy who sat facing her so the teacher moved her seats around - end of problem. In fact they're classmates again this year and she's friends with him.

Nicola - posted on 11/20/2009

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If its a recent occurence have you considered he may be being bullie dhorrible to think about i know but if its a sudden thing maybe a reason.

April - posted on 11/19/2009

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Hi Nikki, I have a daughter who is 6 and started school this year, often she wants to stay home(sometimes tantrums and hiding under the kitchen table just as we are leaving!) Usually I just take the time to talk to her and try to work out the reason for her wanting to stay home, sometimes it is because she has issues with peers or teachers at school and has not yet learned the coping mechanism to face these things.. School is such a vast learning ground for our children, often daunting for them too. If you can be involved on his class at school it would help, and you would get an inside view into his experiences in the classroom too.. I think that force will only make him more inclined to resist. Speak to his teacher too, maybe he/she has some insights or advice to offer you about your son.. If he is just refusing to participate, and not being disruptive in class, then it seems that he is not able to voice what his real issue is..Find a time when he is involved in an activity he likes, and then (while he is happy) talk to him about these things, you may be surprised at how easily he will talk to you when he is not in the emotion of the moment.. Good luck!

Kimberly - posted on 11/19/2009

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I have a friend who has the same issue. your def. not the only one her older sons 9 he did and her younger boy started this year hes 5 he is the same way. she said try a reward if that don't work talk to his prin. see if you can join him a couple times to get him more into it.it will get easier so just hold in there! good luck

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