What do I do?

Jolene - posted on 10/18/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )

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My 13 year old wants to End Her Life.. She talks about it all the time, and when I asked her to tell me why she feels this way, she tells me Not to worry about it. I am going to worry about it. I tell her. I'd probably shouldn't read her journal, but when my own child doesnt want to talk to me about her problem, how else am I do help her. (so if ya' think I was wrong for reading it... Maybe you haven't dealt with a child who wishes she was dead, and won't talk to you about it. It was my only way to get some answers.) My daughter doesn't trust me, I don't know why, I want her to trust me, so I guess I'm just going to have to built that up. She has to deal with her Dad and his girlfriend Alisha arguing all the time. She doesn't like her dad g/f. And when she asked her Dad if Alisha wouldnt go back in the room, for her appointment, he doesn't care. She can't express her feelings about Alisha to her counselor. (yes she is getting some help) She has to deal with alot of drama at school, her Friend Amanda refuses to sit with her cuz of some Boy won't allow her, she does't eat lunch at school and she feels that the whole school hates her. When she is with me, she had to deal with Andrew making fun of her stuttering. Which was quickly put to an end, And I told Andrew if I caught you doing it or if I'm told you are doing something stupid like that again. U won't be here anymore. So far, everything been going okay. My daughter, been staying with me more, refusing to go to her dad, who has legal custody of her. So, I suppose that things are less stress at my place right now, which I guess is okay, but I just wish she would just open up more to me. I want my kids to be happy, but I know I can't force them. Sometime she calls me drama queen, What is that suppose to mean? When you don't do what your suppose to your going to get some sort of punisment. in this case. Your going to get lecture. Like she didn't get dishes clean and I told her to re wash them and she called me drama queen. Excuse me child, learn to pay attention, and i wouldn't have to yell. then of course she gets upset and calls her dad, and that gets her even more upset, cuz seem like everytime she calls him straight to voicemail, so she goes off on him and how he is spending to much time with Alisha. I know I need to gain her trust. It will be a work in progress. I want to help her before its to late. How do I?

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Dove - posted on 10/19/2012

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Who is Andrew?



Her dad may have legal custody, but SHE has a right to be in with her counselor alone and I can't imagine a counselor that would stand for even a parent supervising their entire conversations... the girlfriend has zero right legal or otherwise to be there. Even my 6 year old was alone with her counselor 50/50 or more.



If you don't have legal custody then I don't know exactly what your rights are, but I would be taking my child straight to the ER if they were talking about wanting to die. She NEEDS help and is obviously not going to get it with her father micromanaging the 'help' that she is getting. Call your lawyer and take this to court if you need to. Something HAS to be done and better sooner than later.



She still has chores and responsibilities that she should not be slacking on, but you are seriously yelling at your daughter over the dishes when she is so depressed that she wants to DIE?! Find another method... please. Perhaps a chore and consequence chart clearly printed out on the fridge. Then there is no discussion, no argument, and no yelling needed when something doesn't get done.

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